[tanyak1]

My 3 1/2 year old has always been a fussy eater and gradually the foods he will eat are getting less and less. He has never been good with meat or alternatives - won't eat steak/chicken/mince/fish/eggs/baked beans etc. The only meat he would eat were sausages (and chicken nuggets but he doesn't have those regularly), and in the last few days he has started refusing sausages as well. he has also not touched a vegetable since he was about 1.

He will eat toast/bread, spagetti (with cheese and tomato sauce), fruit, milk, yoghurt and cheese. And to add to the frustration, he eats lunch at daycare (stuff like meatballs, ravioli and other pasta, rice, fish cakes, burgers etc), but he refuses to eat them at home, even when I cook exactly what he has at daycare.

What do I do?? On Sunday night I decided to be tough and not let him have anything else if he didn't eat his dinner, he refused to eat it so I put him to bed even though he was asking for bread, apples etc, I felt awful and so did DH who took him in some fruit and bread. Tonight I tried again, but gave him a piece of cheese before bed. I just don't feel right sending him to bed hungry (and he was hungry, he said so), and wonder if I am making too big of a deal of it, and should just let him eat what he likes, but then get worried again he's not getting the right nutrition.

He is tall for his age and a normal weight and developing normally, so he doesn't look or seem malnourished, but I'm really worried he's not getting enough protein and iron.

Any suggestions??

[Ehill]

You will never achieve anything if you keep taking him cheese and bread in bed, sorry. I would be sending him to bed hungry. He will figure it out pretty quickly, children dont starve themselves.
Good luck. For the record I know it is not easy, i have a 3 yo who has been fussy but I am getting tougher. Dinner is dinner, once it is packed away it is gone. I have been focusing on dinner being 'yummy' but I am a SAHM and not that busy at the moment so I do have time to cook in the afternoons.

[nlman]

In my house, I make dinner based on what everyone in the house likes. No-one has to eat it.

However, if you decide that you are not going to eat dinner tonight, then the next food offered will be weetbix, which will be served at 7am tomorrow morning.

[Gen71]

If he is eating good food at daycare, I would stick to your guns. You know he can do it, so it is truely a battle of wills.
Do not give him anything. He is still winning with cheese/fruit/bread before bed.
I know it is tough, but I have been doing similar with my DS 3 at the moment, hard work, but you will get there.
Good luck

[Chubbles]

I am one of the tough ones. I believe if they are hungry they will eat what I have given them. I've never offered an alternative unless they are sick. My kids would never eat dinner if they knew they could get fruit or cheese instead.

[squirt081]

OP I made the mistake of giving into DD when she was 15mths old. Now at 3yrs she wont eat anything she doesn't want to. She wont eat fruit and veggies but will at daycare. Anyway for 6mths months we have had a rule that if she doesn't eat most of her meal then she can wait till the next one or eat what she was given. Most nights she eats 1/4 of dinner then goes to bed hungry. Sometimes when really hungry she will eat a bit more dinner.

Now my DS has started refusing his meals and I wont make the same mistake. if he doesn't eat he waits till the next meal. it took 2 meals of this happening for him to give in.

OP stay strong, I know it's hard but it's worth it.