[mamma2miracles]

My kids are older now, but when I had a baby and toddler, and DH was out at work, I kept to the same routine - 5.00 toddler dinner, 6.00 bath for both (I put baby in one of those reclined bath seats that looks like a little slide), then would pull baby out of the bath first, put them on a towel/blanket on the bathroom floor, dress them, pop them in a rocker. I bottle fed so I'd then start bottle, when toddler finished bath, I'd take him out, dress him and then take both out to the lounge for final cuddles etc. Then both to bed, it gets MUCH easier when baby gets a bit older and has the same night time routine as the toddler.

[ausmumof2]

My DH is home but some nights works late or is away and is not superinvolved. Some nights are easy some are hard.

What helps

start baths early around 4.30 to 5.00 (or a suitable time before bedtime)
get dinner organised earlier in the day so its just putting it together
read bedtime stories to older kids while feeding the bub
sit/cuddle toddler while you are feeding the bub on or in their bedroom to help them wind down for sleep.

And yes it is a challenge but you will manage if its necessary.

[Manicmum]

DH works 5.30 to whenever.

When the youngest was born the older two were 19 months. Dinner was cooked in the monings, often with bubs in the sling, so was breakfast and most things. Insould b/f whilst getting the others to sleep. Get a swing!

It's hard, but worth it !

[Luci]

My DH works long hours, I don't think I have ever had him help with the evening routine. My kids are now 4 and 6 but what I used to do was early dinner for the toddler (if possible prepare it earlier so when she went feral at 5pm it can be served up quickly).

Then I would bath them together - toddler in big bath, baby in baby bath next to the big bath. Then the 3 of us would hop into our bed together and watch TV while I breastfed the baby to sleep. I would then pop him into his cot, and take the toddler to her room for stories and bed.

When the baby was really tiny I would breastfeed him in bed with the toddler, while reading her a book. I would then pat the toddler until she dozed off (while still holding the baby) then pop the baby into the cot.

TBH I found it worked very smoothly. The evening routine is worse these days - they don't want to turn off the TV, won't do piano practice or homework blah blah, plus now they can talk they like to argue and ask for a night off having a bath, more stories, it just goes on and on!!

[lozoodle]

Oh its not so bad, just find something that works and do it. I've always done bedtimes on my own as DP works quite long hours.

When DD2 was a newborn, I'd put DD1 to bed first, then I'd bath DD2, then do her last feed and put her to bed shortly after.

When she got a bit older and started going to bed earlier I started putting DD2 to bed first, while DD1 would sit and watch a TV show. We still do this today.

At the moment our routine goes like this:

5pm - dinner for both (and sometimes I'll eat with them if I'm hungry)
5.30pm - bath for both, and then a bit of quiet playtime
6.00pm - bed for DD2
7.00pm - bed for DD1

When number 3 arrives early next year I will likely do something similar.

This post has been edited by lozoodle: 03/08/2012, 07:32 AM

[Frau Farbissina]

You work out whats the best routine for them and do it. DD2 was a night owl, so I used to just put DD1 to bed whilst either bf or just holding her

Same. Just read stories with DS1 while he was in bed and often I was bf'ing or holding DS2 if he was awake. Both of my kids are of the night owl variety, so this was usually around 8pm.

[winkywonkeydonke...]

Early dinner and always put the toddler to bed first is what worked best for me. Once the toddler is asleep you can just relax with the new baby and not worry about breastfeeding for hours. And things are alot easier if toddler has dropped the day sleep as they go to bed early

Stick to the bedtime routine.

[belindarama]

I have always done bedtime alone as well. I didn't find it so bad. You have to adapt the routine regularly as the baby changes his routine so quickly. There's always a way to manage though.

I have done the BFing while reading stories to the older one, putting them down separately or at the same time and so on, it just evolves as the baby grows. Now they are on the same routine it is easy. The most difficult time was when DS2 was a newborn and cluster feeding like crazy in the evening. I just carried him around attached while i did stuff. I had DS1's little table in front of the couch where I fed and he ate there while I fed the baby. Sometimes he watched a DVD or we chatted. Then he helped me bath the baby and I would put him to bed then bath DS1.

Now it is dinner at 5.30, a bit of play, bath together at 7, into pjs and then stories for the little one and into bed. DS1 either chooses his stories or just amuses himself in his room for a few minutes while I get DS2 into bed. Then his stories, we do chapter books for him so separate stories, brush teeth and into bed. No drama.

You have to be firm from the outset that there is no monkey business at bed time if you are alone. Here if there is too much mucking around or making it hard for me there are no stories that night. The other ing that helps is ensuring the big one can amuse themselves for a while before the baby comes along. If they are no good at independent play it will be a struggle generally.

[nessrose]

Hi there,

We have a 7 year old, 5 year old twins, a 2.5 year old and 3 month old.

During the week my DH is never home before at least 9pm.

At the moment our 3 month old goes to bed first at around 6.30. I breastfeed her in her room with the door open so I can keep track of what the others are doing. Our house is one level so it's not such a problem. they are good at keeping each other amused too.

At about 7 It is teeth and story time for the others, then our 5 year olds and 2.5 year old go to bed. At 8 pm our 7 year old goes to bed.

We bath on alternate days, ie 2 one day, 2 the other day etc. we also meal plan which makes things easier and I prepare dinner if I can earlier in the day, ie cook bolognaise sauce at lunchtime ready to just reheat later. We always have an early dinner.

I get out school clothes, pack bags the night before and put on a load of washing ready to hang the next morning. You always feel a bit more organised if you make sure the kitchen is cleaned up before you go to bed.

You will soon work out what works for you.