[neaka]

Hi everyone,

We are in week 2 at Family Day Care. I am pretty happy so far but there have been afew little incidences. Ds has bitten other kids twice and has a tendancy to 'lean' on other children. He does it to our cat at home i actually think its an affection thing but obviously little kids dont appreciate being 'leaned' on.

He didnt bite anyone on Tuesday but the carer said whenever he did the leaning thing she would make him sit on the step away from the kids. Understandably she has to keep a close eye on him becasue of the biting thing but i felt abit uncomfortable with him being singled out and made to sit away at such an early age?

He just squashed the cat just now and tried the whole sitting him on the step and he didnt understand in the slightest what i was making him do, just wondering is it too early for a carer to be administering dicipline such as time out to a 20 month old?

I thought distraction was what was best at this age?

Thoughts? Thank you!

[IBakeBoys]

I'd say it was fine if it was immediatley following and incident, and only for short period of time - 20 months is getting pretty close to two, its not like hes a baby anymore IYKWIM?

ETA: Maybe it depends on the kid? DS3 isn't that much older and very much understands consequences for actions etc.

This post has been edited by IBakeBoys: 22/02/2012, 08:12 AM

[eleishas]

Way too young. Unless he understands what he is doing and the punishment that follows, it won't work.

A simple, "no billy, hop up. You'll hurt sarah if you squash her" and moving him away would be much more effective IMO.

This post has been edited by eleishas: 22/02/2012, 08:14 AM

[amabanana]

I don't agree with time out at all so that's a no from me.

[Working_Mummy]

It wont click the first time, or maybe the first half dozen times, but if it is a problem and needs discipline it will eventually relate.

They use thinking time at the childcare for even the under 1s - DS seemed to be able to relate to thinking time / time out from an early age.

It only needs to be 20/30 seconds. I guess similar to being picked up and moved away to the other side of the room but making it a step / mat / chair makes it discipline rather than moving away - distraction technique.

This post has been edited by Working_Mummy: 22/02/2012, 08:17 AM

[paddyboo]

I think every child is different, but it makes sense they need to understand what is happening. If they don;t understand I doubt it would have much effect on the problem

[bubblegummum]

Fine. I would have no problem with a child that age being temporarily removed for that sort of thing. And she's also got to deal with other parents who might want to know that if he's being too hands on with their kids that the carer is removing the child. If it was my own kids I'd be going for distraction but the reality is that your carer is probably trying to juggle the needs of 4-5 very young children; something I never had to do.

[Jess1]

I would have thought it was too young but she has kids every day so perhaps it does work. I think that as long as your son isn't upset and she isn't to harsh with discipline I would let her do her thing.

[Matthias' mum]

It worked very well with DS at that age. He had a chair he would sit on for a break for about 30sec. It helped break the cycle of behaviour, and he definitely understood that it was his actions that put him there away from his toys.

[~Supernova~]

I think it's fine. He is old enough to start being taught that bad behaviour has consequences, and after a few goes he will understand the correlation between his behaviour and having to sit on his own.