[littlebeany]

Hello i deff dont belong at this section but just thinking ahead and would love opinions from those who have been there and done that....


I had my first baby whos coming up to 6 months. Ive always dreamed about having between 4-6 kids. I do want to be done by the time im 30 though esp since 12 yr age gap between hubb and i.

Im 23 yrs old and was wondering... would you rather

1) Have 6 kids and have them one after the other and finish at age 30
2) Have 4 kids quickly and by done by age 28 ish
3) OR have 4 kids but space them out a bit and be done by age 30

I know this depends on sooo many factors but was curious what would you do now looking back? Whats easier in terms of spacing or not? 4 kids or 6 kids?

[rosiebird]

Why don't you just see how it goes? You don't need to plan the spacing now - and babies are not very good at arriving on your schedule anyway. See how you feel with 2 and when you have that under control, start trying for 3 etc

[sophiasmum]

If I had to choose I would pick option 3.

[Sassy Girl]

I'd see how it goes but I also wouldn't give yourself a cut off of thirty.

What if it takes you 7 years of ttc and you still aren't pregnant with no.2 do you stop and have an only child or do you keep trying ?

I would love to have six, we have four. If I wasn't so old (and the fact that every time I give birth someone close to me dies, but that is a whole other issue ), I'm 40, I'd have two more.

[mama123]

You sound just like me! You know this is irrational thinking don't you

We started at 24 going on 25. We wanted 6 and had to be finished by 32. So you do the math on that one, all close spacings.

I am 29 and pregnant with no. 4. All going to plan this little one will be born before we turn 30. We will have 4 under 5, just!

I had the first 3 under 3 and let me tell you, breastfeeding whilst pregnant and chasing a toddler is hard work! So that's why this one is coming along a little later than 'usual'.

I don't know exactly where we will go from here. I have up'd my age limit to 33. We may still have more children, depending on the finances and our sanity. We are finally at the stage where 'planning' has gone out the window and we are just taking it day by day.

I know how you feel though. I have this compulsive need to know what we are doing but it's just not realistic when it comes to life in general. Only time will tell

[GenWhy]

I'd go with spacing at least 3 years between kids if it was me. I had 3 under 3 and also worked and I almost had a complete breakdown. Not fun at all. I'm starting to enjoy my kids a lot more now the youngest is 3. We are planning on TTC number 4 this month and I'm 31. I wish I spaced them way better but in saying that, I am hopefully going to have 3 bigger helpers.... Or I'm losing my mind. Either or

[back*again]

I think you should take it 1 at a time, and with gaps you're happy with AT THE TIME.

Having said that, I had 6 kids by the time I was 30, although I started when I was 20. And it was/is pretty hard core.

I didn't plan to do this before I had kids, when people asked how many kids we were planning I just said "wait and see if I like the first one first".

[Ianthe]

Less kids bigger gap. But I always knew I wanted five kids and didn't want them too close so I knew I would have babies into my late 30's. I was 38 when my youngest was born.