[kemisz]

I don't think complaining about motherhood being boring, makes it boring. I think singing "If Your Happy And You Know It" for the five hundredth time makes it boring.

Smiling and getting through the day is fine, so I get your point. But in my opinion, we're human beings. We need to be ourselves at some point.

We're Mummy to our children all day long. The point of the blog is to say what we can't to our kids: that being a mother can suck, that it's often painful and a massive sacrifice. They don't need to hear of feel that coming from us. I get everything out so that I can laugh about it and come back to my kids the next day, refreashed and ready to be what they need me to be.

[Rumply]

I was just thinking the other day that so many books and forums and blogs are just full of whinging. In particular the book of Kaz Cooke's (Up The Duff), that got so depressing and full of whinging that I didn't bother reading it past 30 weeks.

I agree, it is good to be able to say stuff is rough and hard. In fact I went looking through my Facebook timeline recently and noticed how hard things were last year when we were having a lot of sleep issues with DS. I knew it was hard at the time, but looking back now I can see how far we have come... I am sure all my friends got sick of me whinging!!

I agree with what you say, once you start saying something is 'x' then you come to expect to always be 'x'. I admitted that I was lazy and now I feel almost justified when I don't do something, because I admit I am lazy. We pack ourselves into little boxes and start thinking that our worlds are just the sides of the boxes.

I whinge often here on EB and appreciate all the support I get back. But I particularly love reading those posts that a proud parent put up about their childs achievements... they too give me hope that maybe one day my child will also do something so exiciting that I need to post about it too.

In fact, last night he decided on his to go and sleep by himself in his own room. We have been trying to do this on and off for 12 months with a lot of tears and tantrums (both his and mine), but last night he decided it was time. It might not happen again for a while, but it happened once I feel good that it could happen again...

Ok, will stop rambling now...

[BBabymaker]

I agree Amity!

Everyone loves to have a whinge, but I think people just like to be:

• inspired
• realise that others are in the same boat sometimes
• get reassurance that things will get better
• relate to different situations
• get some sympathy
• and know that there are worse things in life than having your child throw a tantrum in the middle of a shopping centre.

I also agree with a few other posters who mentioned they feel like they can't scream from the hilltops that they love being a mum and their child has been nothing but sunshine! I too am one of those mums and feel like I'm bragging about my gorgeous little 16 month old girl sometimes. Some of us are blessed with happy, easy going bubs. But I think the difference is is the way the parent reacts to a situation. I'm pretty easy going myself and most things don't bother me, so I think that rubbed off a little on my daughter. It's the old if you show them you are terrified, then they will be too!

I've recently been getting alot of inspiration from my sister who is on a big weight loss journey and is blogging her progress. She's currently dropped over 40kgs with plenty to go and is just looking great! Her blog just gives me motivation and energy to get through my days.

Here's her blog: Sandie's Slimming Down


Enjoy!

[BearBait]

Nice one Amity. I like how BBabymaker put it - everyone wants to share & feel supported in the ups & downs. Most of the time I want to stand on a mountain & sing Sound of Music style about how happy I am. Sure sometimes I change vomit stained sheets 3x in one nite but hey, this is what I signed up for. Sure sometimes it's exhausting, but I don't whine too much on FB or in life - I have friends battling infertility who tear up when getting hugs from my little girl. I count my blessings, which would make very boring blog reading.

[Jip]

Hey a blog about blogs. You're kids must be well-behaved.

[Dinosaurus]

I don't blog and rarely read them.

Short, sharp happiness, whining, terror...on FB or twitter is fine - you hear what your friends are up to and assess if they need a call/visit/meal. It's also lovely to hear the absolute adoration of a new mum. I was so completely besotted with my first for so long I probably drove everyone nuts with it (a bit like the PPs but more full on!)

Then he got older, harder, insubordinate, challenging, started hitting, kicking... Well, the gloss faded

It is nice to have an outlet like EB because it is reassuring that we're not alone in our (negative) feelings, the positives are largely taken as given - we do all adore our kids, I wouldn't blink at cleaning up vomit, wet beds, poo. It's the "I don't waaaaant mashed potato, I don't waaaaant to go out, I don't waaaaaant to wear that" that makes parenting hard. Vomit is easy, it just cleans up!

As for 'in my mums day...' well they had it a lot harder, they had a lot less help, they had a lot less money. They almost definitely still whined to each other.

And talking about the mundanity of motherhood doesn't make it boring, on the whole it's not boring for long, but there is a definite window post-independent movement and pre-coherrent words that is very. Very. Tedious.

Of course, some people are all 'woe is me' and some are all 'there's people worse off you know' but most of us teeter in the middle, enjoying lots, hating lots, wondering how long that piece of pop corn has been under the sofa as your child deftly pops it into his mouth with the joy of a prize found.

A nice piece, but as you say, not as interesting as some good old fashioned carnage!

[Guest_NinjahKitteh_*]

I totally agree - letting it all out, especially focussing on the humourous side of an otherwise CRAPPY parenting day is terribly cathartic!

[BetteBoop]

I do agree that the "Tales of Woe" get the most comments. It is not that we celebrate the bad, it is that we want to support each other when motherhood gets really, really crappy.

Personally, I avoid "Happy, happy, joy, joy" blogs because they're boring. They don't inspire me to seek happiness, unless they acknowledge the bad and provide practical solutions and advice on how to enjoy motherhood more.

I enjoy blogs that show that there is more to a woman than mothering. I enjoy blogs that talk about all aspects of mothering. I enjoy blogs that are funny, wise and thought provoking.

This.

I also think talking about the negatives of mothering is fairly socially unacceptable, If it's humourous, it's entertaining so people don't get offended.

I suspect mummy bloggers would get flamed if they whinged about their kids with no attempt to be amusing.

[jmv123]

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