[Pup-pup]

My DD is starting to test the boundaries. Things that come to mind are kicking/screaming when having to go in high chair or pram, running off or ignoring me. I feel like I'm yelling a lot, and I don't want to. How do you discipline & what for?

[Chezmlka]

I am in the same situation at the moment. My son is 2 and whenever I try to change his nappy he kicks at me as hard as he can, when I try to put him in the pram he kicks and screams, when I try to put him in his car seat he digs his nails in and scratches my arms. The scratching worries me. More often than not I have big scratches on my arms from him. Usually when he scratches me he draws blood so I end up with scabs all over my arms. Generally he's a good kid but when he doesn't want to do something he certainly lets you know. I find yelling at him doesn't work. If I get frustrated and start yelling he just laughs at me. I'm not sure what to do about it so I can't help you but hopefully someone here has some good ideas.

[AvadaKedavra]

Counting to three and then sitting in the corner works for us. To get out of the corner, have to count to ten and then apologise for what he's done wrong. Started about age 2. Now at 2.5 we almost never get to ''3' - the threat of 'do we need to count to three and sit in the corner?' is usually enough, and we get to 2 at worst. But it did take some ripper tantrums in the corner to get to this point! We just stayed really calm through them and reiterated the rules until he claimed down, and he just got better with time.

[meggs1]

I have NFI (DS is only 6 mo) but I was reading a book which suggested

Giving plenty of warning of what's coming next, and what you expect them to do.

Role playing the correct behaviour with a teddy.

[SomeAussieChick]

DS2 is 2 and I usually say NO! Or that's not nice be gentle. I say gentle in a soft voice lol. I also clap my hands together loudly and that gets his attention and he stops being silly. 1,2,3 works as well. I remove and distract if a situation isn't going well. Once in a while if he is being particularly foul I give him a swat on the bum. Never on the skin just on his pants. I know spanking isn't for everyone but I only do it as a last resort.

[Soccer Mum]

LOL my DD who has just turned one does most of this
Sorry im no help


ETA counting to 3 was excellent for a friend's DS. He never got to 3!

This post has been edited by Soccer Mum: 12/04/2012, 12:25 PM

[HeroOfCanton]

DD is only 22 months, but 1,2,3 has already stopped working
If I say 1 and hold up a finger, she replies with 'two' and a huge grin, then continues whatever she was doing.
Grrr

[hollysmama]

Oh I'm hearing you. My 2.5 yo DD is driving me bonkers. Not only does she not understand the word 'no', but she refuses to ask for things in a calm manner. She'll just throw a hissy fit straight away and it's almost impossible to calm her down. I've tried yelling, I've smacked her out of sheer frustration, putting her in her room, but the tantrum continues.

So I've tried to change my approach. If she refuses to do something that I've asked her to do, I will threaten to take something she loves away from her, like a toy or a book, or her colouring pens. or I will tell her we won't go to swimming lessons or something else that she loves to do. This has been working quite well.

If she won't take no for an answer, or refuses to use her manners, and then starts chucking a tantrum, I will ignore her, after explaining to her why I've said no. She gets so hyped up that she'll start screaming in my face. So instead of yelling back at her, I calmly lead her into her room and onto her bed, and shut the door behind me. Then I will go in only when she has settled down and explain to her why her behaviour was unacceptable and how we can avoid it in the future. It's really hard because sometimes I am just in tears because she really pushes me to the limit, and I have no idea what I 'm doing. I get so angry that I just have to get her out of my sight.

I hope you find something that works for you. It's a really hard stage to go through, and very very challenging. We just do the best we can. And remember to pick your battles, because sometimes it feels like you are just yelling at them and being mean to them all day. Sometimes you just have to let them go, don't sweat the small stuff.

[TopsyTurvy]

I find engaging DS with eye contact and getting down to his level seems to work the best here. Lots of calm talking and less yelling keeps both of us on a more even keel.
Sometimes it takes a few minutes to get his attention, so I just wait until the carry on stops then turn his head (gently) towards me until he makes eye contact and firmly but calmly explain why we do/don't do XYZ that it's not a choice. Follows by a kiss and hug and then we move right along.

I still do yell from time to time (dont get me wrong) but realise that yelling is more MY problem in that I have failed to remain as calm and patient as possible.

Also I have only DS which makes giving him the time and patience heaps easier.

[Mummy_123]

Hi OP, all good tips from PPs.
If I'm being ignored or he's being in my face and getting a bit too physical with his baby brother, I'll try counting (although I count to 5 lol). As in, 'I'm gonna count to 5, if I get to 5, I'll put you in the other room'.
For it to work, (eventually) you have to actually do what you threaten, so I don't make it too harsh. He gets a bit of a shock when I follow thru.
Distraction sometimes works if they are in a full-blown tantrum ie ask them about their fave toy etc. Lots of cuddles when he is does as I ask (eg puts his dirty (plastic!) dishes in the sink). He loves it.