8 weeks this week

I am 8 weeks this week, wondering how the hell I'm going to cope with four more weeks of nausea and not sleeping. After being on sleeping tablets for 10+yrs I went off the instantly when I did a home test almost three weeks ago and haven't had more then 3-4 hours of uninterrupted sleep since. All I do is toss and turn, and feel sick all damn day, pramin is working about 40% of the time at the moment.
All I do is eat to stop feeling sick. So far not impressed with the first trimester. Really hope I feel better soon because this isn't fun.
Funny thing is I've been waiting since I will 16 to be a mom, 24 yrs I've been waiting to be a mom, finally at 40 ....never expected this was how it would feel. I was hoping for a glowing beautiful wondrous experience and I get the total opposite. Kinda sad, and depressing at the moment. But deep down I keep thinking I'm going to be a mom and this brat better be worth the hell its putting me through. lol. ALREADY. Not even born yet!
I'm supposed to be about 3 months xmas 25-28th can't wait til announce it to everyone. Hoping then it's a little easier on the stomach.
I've had names picked out a long time, boys names since I was 20 and girls name since I was 30 ish. Lol They are DIFFERENT and unique and not going to be another with that name in the damn country let alone 4 times in their class room. Awesome. I don't want ordinary and boring and the same as every second kids. Some says they will be teased but duh every kid gets teased makes no difference what they are called these days some kid will find something to tease another kid about. so I'm not worried. Karate classes will one day come in handy, lol. My mother had absolutely NO imagination with my name, i hate it. So names are very important to me.
Anyway. Blabbering on I still get this butterfly feeling inside and this wow....I'm going to be a mom finally....every single day...still in shock, and can't wait to hold my baby in my arms and say I'm your mom.
that will be the best day of my life.