Jump to content

Not enjoying the newborn stage
Anyone else?


  • Please log in to reply
41 replies to this topic

#26 I*Love*Christmas

Posted 01 May 2012 - 04:24 PM

I hated the newborn stage as well. My SIL is having a baby soon and a friend of mine is due next week and I get asked all the time if it is making me want another. Nope, no way. I don't like the unpredicatability of newborns and the sleep deprivation. But it does pass, and rather quickly in the scheme of things.

#27 melodypond

Posted 01 May 2012 - 04:28 PM

I wouldn't be feeling guilty - you see so many people feel the same!  Newborns can be really hard work and the sleep deprivation and disruption to your settled life with your DS1 probably isn't helping matters!  

My second bub is great and I'm not hating it as I did with number 1, but I am still looking forward to a bit more predictability and settledness in this house!




#28 abc_123

Posted 01 May 2012 - 04:41 PM

Another here who really disliked the newborn stage. In fact, I'm not a fan of the first 12 months at all! DS is now 14 months old, and I'm really beginning to enjoy hanging out with him now - tantrums and all original.gif

I used to cringe when he was a newborn and people told me that it was the best age. Best age? What the...? You're telling me it gets WORSE?

Thankfully it gets MUCH better as time goes by.

Hang in there original.gif

#29 Tea~for~two

Posted 01 May 2012 - 04:45 PM

QUOTE (Rawr @ 01/05/2012, 12:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Aw, I love the newborn stage, they're just so squishy and lovable. They have the sparkliest eyes, too. Yes, it's hard, but it's a stage that is now gone for me and I miss it terribly.


Hehehe - this is what I think whenever I hold other people's newborns - and then it all comes back to me...

Newborns are so much nicer when they belong to someone else original.gif

#30 Cat Burglar

Posted 01 May 2012 - 05:17 PM

I didnt enjoy the stage from 1 - 5 months as DD had shocking reflux. I seriously want the next one to be 6 months old when it pops out - they are much more interactive and have developed personality by then.

Doesnt mean you are a bad mum or dont enjoy being a mum. Hope things pick up!

#31 katevin

Posted 01 May 2012 - 08:31 PM

Double post.

Edited by katevin, 01 May 2012 - 08:35 PM.


#32 katevin

Posted 01 May 2012 - 08:33 PM

QUOTE
I seriously want the next one to be 6 months old when it pops out - they are much more interactive and have developed personality by then.

Ouch blink.gif laughing2.gif

Would be lovely if you could somehow skip the horrible parts of those first 6 months though!

#33 JupitersMoon

Posted 01 May 2012 - 08:57 PM

The newborn stage was awful for me.
DD was a difficult baby, hated the pram, the car, anything other than non stop cuddles and/or bf, including at night, until... oh 12 months, still hated the car until she was turned FF about 14 months.  After that she got better and better, and is a delightful toddler so far - although she is still a crap sleeper. she has tantys but i understand what she wants, and can deal with it.
its only now at 22/23 months i am toying with the idea of another... and im still not ready to take that leap!

#34 belindarama

Posted 01 May 2012 - 09:10 PM

The only thing stopping me from signing on for number three is the thought of being pregnant and the newborn stage.

I don't get the love for it. Yes, there are lovely moments but they are few and far between.

Three months of morning sickness and not sleeping, followed by 6 months of horrific back pain and not sleeping, followed by a newborn and not sleeping. Not sure I can face it...

#35 lylac

Posted 01 May 2012 - 09:16 PM

I really really didn't enjoy my son as a newborn, my daughter wasn't quite as full on.
I'm really glad I'm not going back there.
I don't regret feeling that way - I'm just glad it's over.

#36 Madeline's Mum

Posted 01 May 2012 - 09:17 PM

The first few months are hard. I didn't enjoy it at all. I found it wasn't until about 6 or so months that I really started enjoying him.

Don't beat yourself up, I bet you're doing an amazing job!

#37 nik_klinger

Posted 01 May 2012 - 09:22 PM

I'm quoting a friend of mine who is about to have her 3rd child,

"The first 12 weeks can be a very dark place",

I found this to be quite true. It became a bit of a mantra!!

#38 coolbreeze

Posted 02 May 2012 - 05:01 PM

Oh I love the newborn stage. If they stayed like that I would have a hundred! Predictable, Portable and Feed, Play and Sleep.
Now 18months to 3.5 I find more of a challenge, especially with my second, mainly because I had an older one to deal with and they are harder to communicate with. Lots of chasing down streets and re direction. Tantrums too!
He is four now, great age and the autumn of dependence and almost on the cusp of being a "boy" instead of a pre schooler.
They are still totally in love with you, have more common sense and can control emotions better. Plus they say the cutests things!
But look really, all in all most stages have there pluses and minuses, but I agree each to there own and it is natural to like some stages beter than others.
My mantra through these years are "the days are long, but the years are short" and I am sure I will look back at their babyhood with rose coloured glasses and love ever minute of it. Maybe we remember only the good bits.
Good luck
CB

#39 Mummy-2-1boy

Posted 02 May 2012 - 08:01 PM

I could have written your post word for word! I really don't enjoy having a newborn and a toddler! At least I'm not the only one that feels this way!

#40 Natttmumm

Posted 02 May 2012 - 08:06 PM

Newborn with another child at home is tough work. Hang in there those smiles are worth it once you get more sleep. My youngest is 2 now and sometimes I wish she was a newborn again happy.gif

#41 Oriental lily

Posted 02 May 2012 - 10:34 PM

I love the first year.
From newborn until they are walking.

Toddlers are the bigger challenge in my opinion. I would gladly list my 3 year old and 20 month old on eBay most days lol.

To be honest though I was terrified of my first newborn. I was totally lost and didn't have a clue. With my second and third I threw out the rule book and done my own type of attachment parenting. Co slept from day dot, baby carried and let routine develop at its own rate.

This really gave me freedom.

Newborns make my heart melt They amaze me and fascinate me and they have the most sweet tender little bodies.

A little silky head tucked under your neck and their little bodies curved in to your chest with their little warm breath against you is a type of heaven for me.

I get clucky just thinking about it lol.

#42 Feral_Pooks

Posted 02 May 2012 - 10:46 PM

QUOTE (meggs1 @ 30/04/2012, 07:37 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
There's a reason they call it the fourth trimester.  Any other species and they would still be gestating. Hang in there.


Great point
QUOTE (Tea~for~two @ 01/05/2012, 04:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hehehe - this is what I think whenever I hold other people's newborns - and then it all comes back to me...

Newborns are so much nicer when they belong to someone else original.gif


Agreed..

QUOTE (nik_klinger @ 01/05/2012, 09:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm quoting a friend of mine who is about to have her 3rd child,

"The first 12 weeks can be a very dark place",

I found this to be quite true. It became a bit of a mantra!!


I've discovered this.

Actually I think I'm just starting to sometimes have moments of enjoyment when ds recognizes me, and we have little games we do together and he gets into them quite quickly now. It's like, wow, you are a person, you have a personality, we have a relationship. The more this happens, the more i will bond and enjoy it, I think. I mean I've loved him before I met him, but enjoying him is something else. I wish people talked about this more openly. I'm telling all of my childless friends exactly how it is. If they find it easier than me, great. If not, at least they won't feel as weird and wrong as I did.




2 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 2 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Why Tracey Spicer has given up make-up

"After 30 years on television, I had become what I despised: a painted doll who spent an hour a day and close to $200 a week putting on a mask."

Empowering bikini photo of 46-year-old mum goes viral

When a group of teenagers made rude remarks about her body as she walked past them in a bikini at the local beach, Julie Cross refused to cover up.

Devastated widow discovers she's pregnant the day before husband's funeral

They had been trying to conceive a baby for seven years. Tragically Kristy Kirchner found out she was pregnant the day before her husband Royce's funeral.

Gabriella Goat sues Peppa Pig

Every toddler's favourite television pig is being sued by an Italian woman who shares a name with a Peppa Pig character.

Meet the Mpregs, the male pregnancy enthusiasts

"Men can't have babies - that's something only women can do! But our community is full of like-minded people who wish otherwise."

Your new motherhood survival kit

Forget about the bright, pretty baby things - while you're in survival mode, all you'll need are the essentials.

More than 100,000 cars recalled globally after death of pregnant woman

The announcement of a mass recall comes as Malaysian police investigate the death of pregnant woman in July.

Win a family pass to Disney Live!

We have 4 family passes to give away to see Disney Live! presents Three Classic Fairy Tales, touring Australia this December/January.

I had a 'good baby' but still suffered from postnatal depression

I had a much wanted precious baby girl, a 'good baby' who slept well, self settled and was mostly content. It just seemed implausible to think I could succumb to depression.

There's no need to eclipse a babymoon

As long as pregnant women do their research, travelling during pregnancy can be done safely.

Mum and daughter have babies on same day

"It's not really something you ever want or think could happen. To have my mum going through it with me is probably the most special, amazing thing ever.”

Our baby's reflux caused the longest endurance test of our lives

I'm glad she wasn't my first child, or I would have thought that this was normal.

Win one of 5 Little Tikes Cozy Coupe Sport

Australia?s No 1 selling car is now available in a Sports model and we have 5 to give away to some lucky Essential Baby families.

The podcast that reminds mums they are not alone

A mum's complicated, gruelling labour gave birth to two lovely beings: her daughter and her delightful podcast, The Longest Shortest Time.

Is it too late to change my midwife?

My wife is nine months pregnant and we are planning a home birth - but we've had late problems with our midwife team.

The Very Hungover Caterpillar: a parody many can relate to

A new book released this month will be sure to have parents nodding and giggling in recognition the world over.

Babywearers unite against misinformation

Everyone has heard of people power, but what about passionate babywearing power?

Reliving the birth experience

When people ask about how my labour went, I usually respond: "Good, I think? Four hours long, and yeah it hurt, but I dunno, it's labour, it's giving birth, it's painful... but I guess it was good? As good as good gets?"

Literary baby name inspiration

From Harry Potter to Shakespeare and everything in between, we've scoured the library shelves for literary baby name inspiration.

Preparing your child to attend a sibling's birth

Thinking about having your kids at the birth of your baby? Here are some things to consider.

Counselling helps mum deal with triplets' early birth

When Kimberlee King's waters broke nine weeks before her triplets were due, she went into autopilot as she packed her hospital bag.

The women balancing babies with new businesses

Motherhood teaches us that we can be more tolerant, patient, and loving than we ever thought possible - and can also show us that we're innovative, creative and entrepreneurial, too.

It's true, kids grow up overnight

A dad ponders how his toddler daughter can change so much in just one 24 hour period.

Father sings to dying son days after losing wife

A heartbreaking video shows a new dad singing 'Blackbird' to his dying son just days after losing his wife.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Win one of 5 Little Tikes Cozy Coupe Sport

Australia?s No 1 selling car is now available in a Sports model and we have 5 to give away to some lucky Essential Baby families.

Join PADDINGTON on the red carpet!

To celebrate the release of PADDINGTON, we are giving five lucky winners the chance to win a family pass to the exclusive Australian Premiere in Sydney on December 7!

Knowing you are one of the lucky ones

I am secure, confident and strong, but the responsibility of protecting my children can almost bring me undone.

Why I am so emotional now I have kids?

There are so many ways in which parenthood changes us as women, but one of the most noticeable, for me, has been the changing state of my emotions.

Baby survives despite sharing womb with 'foreign body'

Baby Maia was conceived against the odds, only to find she was sharing a womb with an ominous "foreign body".

Video: Baby shows dog how to jump - or vice versa

They say dog is man's best friend, but this playful pooch seems to have chosen a jumping baby as her number one buddy.

10 ways to soothe a crying baby

New paernts can get frustrated when their newborn gets fussy and can't settle down. When you're feeling overwhelmed, try some of these simple tips to help soothe your baby.

20 baby names that are becoming more popular every year

The data-lovers at nameberry.com have been at it again – this time, they’ve discovered the names that are continually rising up the ranks, ready to take out some top spots in the next few years.

10 great meals to make for new parents

Ideally, you want to give food that isn’t expensive to make, isn't too difficult to create, and freezes well; stews, bakes, soups and pasta sauces are perfect.

'It's not you, it's me': Boston bombing survivor mum to have leg amputated

Rebekah DiMartino is going through a break-up. She even wrote a farewell love letter. But it's not to her husband.

What it's like to go through early menopause

In a cruel twist, Carla had been breastfeeding and perimenopausal at the same time. But she's far from the only one to go through menopause early.

Restaurant served alcohol to two-year-old

Busy restaurants can be forgiven for getting food and drink orders mixed up from time to time, but not when the confusion leads to a two-year-old being served an alcoholic cocktail instead of the child-friendly beverage they ordered.

Julia Morris tells of miscarriage on a flight

Julia Morris has spoken about the devastation of suffering a miscarriage while on an international flight.

Woman's survival after birth 'a story of two miracles'

A US mother is home and tending to her new baby less than a month after surviving without a pulse for 45 minutes.

Eating ice may give mental boost to the iron deficient: study

A new study proposes that, like a strong cup of coffee, ice may give those with insufficient iron a much-needed mental boost.

Tiny lives in caring hands: Thank U NICU Day

Each year in Australia, over 40,000 newborns need the help of a special care nursery or neonatal intensive care unit. One day a year, the staff are honoured by the parents they help through those dark days.

I paid $50,000 to have a girl

This time my husband and I hadn't taken any chances. We had paid $50,000 and travelled 13,000 kilometres to make sure the baby growing inside me was female.

Weird pregnancy products

Some pregnancy products come to market and are just awesome. Others just leave you scratching your head.

Dear firstborn, I'm sorry

Being a first-time mum is tough for so many reasons – particularly because you really have no idea what you're doing.

A trace of sesame could kill my son

Helen Richardson son's had two anaphylactic reactions in a month. It's traumatic for everyone.

When you know before the test says yes

It wasn't a pregnancy test or missed period that told me I was pregnant with my second baby; it was too early for those things. A doner kebab told me I was going to be a mum again.

What not to do when your partner is in labour

Robbie Williams stole the show during his wife Ayda's labour, pretty much demonstrating everything on the "what not to do when your partner is in labour" list.

Best maternity swimwear and beach cover-ups

Thinking about a tropical babymoon but have nothing to wear? Here are some great swimwear and beach cover-up options for mums-to-be.

Mark Latham, you have no idea

Parents who treat their depression are "cowardly", feminists are baby haters with a "psychoneurotic disorder". Really, Mark?

 

How many weeks til Christmas?

On your To-Do list

Get the "Santa" shopping done without the kids in tow.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.