14 mo tantrums
Please tell me its normal
, Apr 18 2012 02:41 PM
9 replies to this topic
Posted 18 April 2012 - 02:41 PM
For the past month or 2 DD has started throwing the odd wobbly. We have been dealing with them ok but recently she has got a bit more aggressive with them. It is usually when she is super tired and generally when she isn't getting her way eg, i take something off her.
She just seems to completely lose it. She will go red in the face, arches her back, screams and more recently has tried to bite me while doing this.
Up until now we go down to her level, hold her hands and tell her no, we don't bite people. This has just made it worse so I am at a loss as to what to do. If I am on the floor with her for example should I just get up and walk away? I don't know what to do when she is trying to latch her mouth onto me!
She has been bitten herself at daycare by another child but has not bitten anyone thankfully (so far) apart from me.
It seems far too early for these sorts of tantrums. They have said at daycare that she is quite advanced for her age so maybe it is just starting early?
I should also mention that she says a few words but is not overly vocal so understand it may be due to frustration at not being able to communicate.
Is this normal and any advice?
Posted 18 April 2012 - 02:45 PM
Yes, it is normal - even that early.
If staying with her and talking isn't working, then trial walking away. Sometimes this is effective as the child begins to associate the behaviour with being alone, so if they don't want to be alone, they (theoretically) stop the behaviour.
Posted 18 April 2012 - 02:53 PM
I distract my now 19 month old when she is having one of these tanties. They started at about 14 months old too. It is especially worse when she wants something and I take it off her, or she wants to tell me something, but cannot verbalise it.
I think this s the root cause of the tanty in the first place, the ability to understand that she wants something, but the inability to verbalise it to someone.
Posted 18 April 2012 - 03:11 PM
My DS who is now fifteen months old, has been doing the same for the last few months too. Although, now that I think about it, it's kind of stopped more recently.
For us, DS would chuck a major tanty sometimes after he had woken up. He didn't want to be held, didn't want to be put down, didn't want a drink, didn't want anything. He would just bawl and writhe around... There was nothing I could do for him. So eventually, I started sitting him in his room on his little couch, saying to him "I know you're feeling frustrated right now, you can sit here as long as you need to, and when you are ready for a cuddle, mama will be right here", then I'd leave him. I would stay in eyesight though, so he knew I hadn't left him, left him, IYKWIM? It took about five minutes, and then I'd go back and ask if he wanted a cuddle, most times he would nod yes and climb up for a cuddle and he'd be right again.
The biting thing, I think, is a frustration thing as well. I know sometimes I feel just so helpless and frustrated I could just bite! DS has done this a few times, and every time I just say "ouch! Don't bite mama". I know he doesn't mean it maliciously, it's just his way of expressing his frustration, so I'm not worried about him biting other kids yet!
GL, I hope it's just a phase for your little me and it's over quickly!
Posted 18 April 2012 - 03:13 PM
Its not only normal but it can get a lot worse than that! I can assure you.
She will grow out of it its just a stage, DS was the same.
Posted 18 April 2012 - 03:16 PM
DS does the same thing (19 months here) but he started at around 14 months and we walk away. He has started to throw any items he can reach around if we tell him no. We just remove those items and ourselves from his situation. its not ideal but he is just at that age.
Hope you can have some luck with your DD in the future!!
Posted 18 April 2012 - 03:22 PM
Sounds exactly like my DD at that age.
She's the same now, minus the biting, 16 months later.
Posted 19 April 2012 - 10:21 AM
It's normal! DD3 is 19 months and started chucking tantrums at 10 months. It continued to get worse and at 12 months she was throwing herself on the floor and screaming.
Yet my 3 year old has never had a tantrum. She just cries. They have completely different personalities. DD3 is a lot more energetic and louder than DD2.
You are right in that when DD is having a tantrum she is loosing it. Tantrums happen because the child has lots control of their feelings. At this age distraction is the best tool to use. DD will often stop a tantrum if I can distract her. We tend not to really ignore tantrums because she is out of control and needs help calming down.
With the biting I would just ignore it and walk away. There is no point in trying to tell her not to bite when she is in the middle of a tantrum. They do not listen when they are out of control.
this might be helpful.http://raisingchildren.net.au/behaviour/to..._behaviour.html
Posted 19 April 2012 - 03:39 PM
DD (13 months) has been having tanties for about 3 months if we take something off her she wants to play with but is not safe, or stop her playing with power cords etc. She just lies on the floor and bawls though, or stamps her feet, she hasnt done any biting (hopefully she wont). Sometimes distraction works but its getting harder and harder to distract her because when she wants something she will keep going back for it over and over
Posted 19 April 2012 - 03:44 PM
My DS started this sort of tanrtum at around 12 months - and he's still going (20 months) on occasion. It seems to be backing off a bit - maybe because he can express himself more now. He has stopped biting but last week he was so angry with me (took a toy from him) that he hit me in the face. There isn't much you can do because I don't think they can actually "hear" you telling them to stop. If that makes sense.
I will walk away from him if it's safe, or if it's not I'll put him in his cot and walk away for a few minutes, but when it's a tantrum about not wanting his carseat restraint on, then it's just too bad and I have to basically pin him in the seat and do what I have to do.
1 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users
It’s mixed in amongst garbled baby talk, but this 10-week-old's apparent attempt at telling her parents that she loves them has made her an internet star.
To say I became obsessed is something of an understatement. Everywhere I went I found cause to be reminded of my impending pain.
One mum says joy is very a personal feeling and expecting all new mums to feel it in the months after their baby born may do more harm than good.
Blogger Kiran Chug explains why she is going to let her toddler make more decisions for himself.
The Silverton family has heard the phrase "it's a girl" for the first time in four generations.
In future when someone I care for, or even someone I barely know, is experiencing a difficult time, I will not overthink it. I'll follow my heart.
Jac Bowie is the founder of Business in Heels, one of the fastest growing women’s networking events in Australia. She shares her story, including how she juggles work with a young family, and ways to work smarter.
Being a mum of identical twin boys stirs up great interest and fascination. It also opens itself up to nosy, invasive questions, as well as huge assumptions.
A mother-of-five who calls her two youngest sons "miracle babies" is just one of many mums seeking financial compensation for their children's unplanned conceptions.
It's a gorgeous song to begin with, but this dad's version of Hallelujah, sung for his young daughter, is especially touching.
While starting solids can be frustrating and messy (yet also fun!), introducing solids can also play havoc on tiny digestive systems.
A mother whose newborn baby was snatched from hospital has spoken of her joy and relief at getting her daughter back.
Are bumpies - bump selfies - really "exhibitionism of the weirdest kind"?
Acknowledging that motherhood isn't a bed of roses – to begrudge lack of time, sleep, money and spontaneity – is sacrilegious and a no-no, especially by mother superior-types.
A sequel is coming soon to the 2011 hit book 'Go the F*** to Sleep' - and this time, it's about mealtimes.
Fill out this quick survey and tell us in 25 words or less your best pregnancy or parenting tip - you'll go in the draw to win a $200 Pumpkin Patch voucher.
Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.
While watching your baby grow into a unique little person is exciting and wondrous, the intensity of meeting everyone else?s needs can ever so sneakily overtake your own needs for self-care.
Almost all women will experience bruising, grazing or tearing after a vaginal birth. Depending on the degree of tearing, there are various treatments available.
Outings can be lots of fun with the kids, but there are inevitable challenges. Here's some information about days out to help you be a little more prepared.
I sent invitations on burgundy scrapbooking paper stamped with a field of poppies, and told each person why I wanted him or her there. I warned that there would be nudity.
When your baby?s due date comes and goes without so much as a pop - let alone a bang - it can be disheartening. Mums and a doula share their stories of natural inductions.
As I sat across the table from my friend ? me, a seasoned mother of three; her, a brand new mum ? I thought of all the mistakes an old-hand parent can make when visiting a newborn baby.
Unbearable anxiety, unspeakable joy, constant exhaustion and bouts of frustration ... The many shocks of first-time fatherhood resound in a dad's diary of his son's early months.
Finances may not be as cute as a newborn, but with many women?s working arrangements changing post-baby, monetary matters need attention too.
Are bumpies really "exhibitionism of the weirdest kind", as one writer has claimed?
We've scoured the internet to find gorgeous personalised keepsakes and nursery decor to record baby name and dates. They make great gifts for christenings, name days and birthdays! (All prices in AU.)
We look at your wellbeing, covering health, relationships, beauty and fashion, mind and body.