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Toilet training question/vent..


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#1 spottydog

Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:40 PM

Was just wanting to have a mini vent, and a bit of a WDYT.

My DD is 2y7m and is not yet toilet trained, she has just never been ready. Now its cooler in NSW i probably wont start TT again until the spring, when she will be around 3y or so.

Loads of people ask is she TT, its like one of the first question people ask, how old is your daugheter, whats her name, is she TT? She is VERY tall for her age and wearing 3-4uk or 4 AU clothing, so maybe its that.

The thing i find hard is the whole, no she isint, she isint ready yet, but i focus on the things she can do, like the alphabet etc, and boast about that so to speak.

Anyway my question is.. what age was your LATE toilet trainer toilet trained?

What age is too late for a girl?

cheers, spotty.

#2 scooty

Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:54 PM

Dont let them bother you. People always have an opinion that they cant help but express whether you want to hear it or not.

My DS is 3 1/2 and still wears nappies when we go out sometimes. I'm not going to pressure him to wear undies when he is too tired or is not comfortable doing it for the day. I do however, encourage him to go naked when we are at home, so he can get the idea of going whenver he needs to. He has much improved over the last few months and I also thought he would just never 'get' it. He even woke up dry one time this week overnight, so there is hope for us yet.

I dont think 3 1/2 is really too late, she'll get it in her own time.

#3 Marchioness Flea

Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:05 PM

My GP told mum that no child starts school in nappies.
But I suspect that's because any child still in nappies at 5 or 6 might be refused a spot in the class.
Your daughter is just over 2.5, I don't see a rush UNLESS she's starting preschool and can't be in nappies(my niece had to be TT by 3 to go to 'playschool' early learning centre type place.)
Some kids just aren't ready before 3 or so and i don't see a problem with it personally. My mum seems to think once my daughter turns 2(next week) she'll automatically TT, and I KNOW that won't happen! She can't even say yes if I ask if she's done a poo, let alone go to a potty or toilet in time.
I don't mind changing nappies, easier than cleaning messes on the floor from a child who's not ready.

#4 HIH.GD.Isolabella

Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:09 PM

DS1 and DS2 were both 3.25yrs when I TT them. DS1 'got' it within 5 days (and 10 days after that did the drive Mel-Syd with the same toilet stops as DH and I). DS2 'got' it within 5 days too.... but for pee only. He refused to poo on the toilet (would poo in his undies) until 3.75yrs of age.

DD is 2.25yrs. Although she has done some Poo's on the toilet, she has hit the 'no' resistant stage so I am not pushing it. I am happy to wait over the winter and re-asses as she turns 3 in Dec (although she will have to be TT for wees at least for Kindy by the start of Feb).

DS2 started Kindy not being TT for poo. He only did one poo in his undies in the 5m he was at Kindy and not TT for Poo.

I would say it is possibly more due to her size then age.

#5 Angelina Ballerina

Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:27 PM

We've been trying (and failing) to TT my 3 yr old DS for about 6 months.

We get him to sit on the toilet regularly and he will usually wee. But he never asks to go to the toilet and doesn't care if his undies are wet.
He locks himself in the pantry to poo...and then sometimes takes his pants off and gets it everywhere.

It's very frustrating. I'm amazed I haven't throttled the child.

#6 Sweet like a lemon

Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:36 PM

I tt'ed early because I'm lazy and I hate changing nappies but I don't think there is a normal age. As long as you're there by kinder age there is probably no reason to worry and 3 years seems to be the current trend anyway.

OT though, "isint" is a bit of a worry. Please tell me you're typing on your phone.

#7 Soontobegran

Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:37 PM

Relax, she isn't ready!
There are always those people wanting to tell you thre babies were trained at 12 months but they weren't..they were parent trained.
When she starts waking from her sleep dry then it is a sign she may be getting some control. It doesn't matter if it is winter or summer when you train your children because they don't need to be clothesless just because they are TTing.

There is a long time frame yet before you need to be worrying at all.
Good luck

#8 spottydog

Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:43 PM

QUOTE (ForsakenTruth @ 11/04/2012, 08:36 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I tt'ed early because I'm lazy and I hate changing nappies but I don't think there is a normal age. As long as you're there by kinder age there is probably no reason to worry and 3 years seems to be the current trend anyway.

OT though, "isint" is a bit of a worry. Please tell me you're typing on your phone.


Geez thanks for picking on my typing/spelling. No wonder people are too scared to post simple questions.


QUOTE (soontobegran @ 11/04/2012, 08:37 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Relax, she isn't ready!
There are always those people wanting to tell you thre babies were trained at 12 months but they weren't..they were parent trained.
When she starts waking from her sleep dry then it is a sign she may be getting some control. It doesn't matter if it is winter or summer when you train your children because they don't need to be clothesless just because they are TTing.

There is a long time frame yet before you need to be worrying at all.
Good luck


Thanks, the she isint (haha) ready is good, what i kind of needed to hear.

Thanks for everyones helpful suggestions. Appreciate it.

spotty.


#9 SMforshort

Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:54 PM

My kids were 3.5yrs, 3.99yrs (decided he was going to use the toilet now because it's his birthday tomorrow... no accidents) and 2.9yrs.

Personally I like a passive agressive response...

Q: Is your child nearly three and not toilet trained?
A: Yes, do you think that makes me a complete failure as a mother?

but then I like to watch people back pedal.

#10 Feral2202

Posted 11 April 2012 - 09:00 PM

MIL claims that SIL was TT at 14 mths 'not that she didn't have accidents'!  Lots of people go on about how early their kids toilet train, when in fact they're just using their undies, not nappies. Wait until your child is ready and they'll actually toilet train instead of peeing on the floor!

#11 Hunch

Posted 11 April 2012 - 09:08 PM

My DD was one of the later ones in our circle of friends, she was 3 yrs 4 months. I tried a couple of times before we had success but neither of us were ready and it was too stressful!

Please don't let it bother you, after our experience I don't believe on pushing it if your child isn't ready. God knows when I'll try with DS wink.gif

#12 spottydog

Posted 11 April 2012 - 09:31 PM

QUOTE (Hunch @ 11/04/2012, 09:08 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
My DD was one of the later ones in our circle of friends, she was 3 yrs 4 months. I tried a couple of times before we had success but neither of us were ready and it was too stressful!

Please don't let it bother you, after our experience I don't believe on pushing it if your child isn't ready. God knows when I'll try with DS wink.gif



Thank you, original.gif

I appreciate everyone taking time out to write a reply.

We do use the potty every night before the bath, she wee's every time. She is a heavy wetter and i have to routinely change her nappy at 6am, 9am,12pm,2pm and 6pm, lol, she wets through atleast once a week. She is NEVER dry.
She is starting to get shy about doing a number two in her nappy infront of us, but we just ignore her, as i dont want to create a problem. We do say do you want to go to the toilet, but she always replies with a no.

I thought initially i was being lazy, but i was looking for the signs, and there are none.

Thanks again.

spotty.

#13 ~ky~

Posted 12 April 2012 - 01:19 AM

Most children are day toilet trained around 3 years of age. What many people forget is that children are 3 years of age for an entire 12 months!

Night training can take anything up to 8 years of age before it becomes a real issue.

Both of my older kids day toilet trained themselves in the week of their 3rd birthdays and night trained themselves at 7yo. No issues with either type of training - as soon as they were ready they were dry from then onwards.

DS was the size of a 3yo at 18mo. By the time he was 3yo I had been told by many people that he was far too old to be wearing nappies. I just stated his age and that he wasn't ready and then tuned them out.

I'll be just as relaxed with Anna ...

#14 Alina0210

Posted 12 April 2012 - 01:56 AM

my son was 3yrs 2months... we never pushed the issue or used a potty... one night he asked if he could go without a nappy at night.. layered his bed with towels and he was dry all night... after 3 nights of this, he decided no more nappys during the day, and would take himself off to the toilet.... no stress and no fuss... maybe 1 or 2 accidents if he was busy playing but not very many...

#15 judy_

Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:19 AM

Have you had a shot at toilet training?

I never saw any magical 'signs' in my boys.  The only sign was 2 candles on the birthday cake and I was sick of buying nappies.....

I trained DS1 at 2 years 3 months and DS2 the week he turned 2.

I think it's worth having a good shot and if it doesn't work then back off and try again later.

I definately pushed the issue but I was sick of nappies.  But I can't say it was particularly hard or stressful and I would definatley do the same thing again.....

They both night trained at 2 years and 6 months without any work on my part whatsover really.

#16 strawberrycakes

Posted 12 April 2012 - 08:59 AM

My DD day TT just before her 3rd birthday, I was also getting the why is still in nappies remarks too & 'so & so' is out of nappies & they are younger etc etc.

TT for DD was so easy becuase we left it until she was ready, only ever had a handful of accidents in the beginning. A year on & I no longer ever need to worry about her having an accident & needing to pack spare clothes.

TT has just started night TT (she is 4yrs 4mths), she is dry about 4 nights out of 7 so pretty good I think. She could probably have stayed in pull nights overnight for a bit longer but tbh I just couldn't be bothered buying them anymore & it is alot cheaper to just buy more waterproof matress protectors original.gif

#17 Mrs_Mystery_Guest

Posted 12 April 2012 - 09:04 AM

I wouldn't worry about it. DS1 didn't fully TT till 3 and a half. DS2 is 3 in June and still in nappies full time. He tells me most of the time when he has done a pooh but only realises he is wet when his nappy is really full. I use cloth so it's not as if it's costing me a bomb.

Do it when kids are ready I say. If other people have a problem than it's THEIR prob.

I'm moving DS2 in to a bed from his cot within the next 2 weeks which knowing him will be a bit of a undertaking. I don't want to take on TT and moving to a bed for the first time at the same time. Move to the bed first and establish then try TT after he is 3.


#18 Baggy

Posted 12 April 2012 - 09:05 AM

DD was terrified of the toilet and simply refused to go for such a long time.

At 3.5yo I put her in only knickers, she had a few accidents for the first three days and then was completely day trained. A couple of weeks later she decided she didn't want a pull up in bed, and she is now night trained too.

I have found that the more you try to push them when they are not ready - the longer they will take. So just wait until she is ready and then it will be easy peasy original.gif

#19 liveworkplay

Posted 12 April 2012 - 09:15 AM

Please dont worry. Honestly, when she is ready, she will be ready and their will be little "training" she will just do it! DH was despairing that DD3 would not TT (both older girls were early TTers) He tried to force her and she wouldnt have a bar of it. One day, just after she was 2.5, she started going to the toilet and that was that! We had a few issues with #2 and that took her a few weeks longer to be confortable, but we've not had one "accident" at all and the only problem at daycare they have had was early on when she was till having a nappy for naps and they forgot.

I always smirk a bit when reading all the angst on here about TT. It really does not have to be hard at all. Let them know what to do and where and leave it to them! Three out of three cannot be coincedence.

QUOTE
They both night trained at 2 years and 6 months without any work on my part whatsover really.


Just on this, you cannot "night time train" It is physiological and nothing youo can do can alter the hormone/brain control required. I had one DD dry at night 2 weeks after she was daytime dry. She has never once wet the bed. I had another who took 5 years after she was day time dry to be night time dry and had quite a few accidents in the begining.

Edited by liveworkplay, 12 April 2012 - 09:22 AM.


#20 jessiesgirl

Posted 12 April 2012 - 10:12 AM

QUOTE (ForsakenTruth @ 11/04/2012, 09:36 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I tt'ed early because I'm lazy and I hate changing nappies but I don't think there is a normal age.


Yes I waited until my DD was nearly 3 because I am a hard working mother and I really like changing nappies  rolleyes.gif



#21 Jen1

Posted 12 April 2012 - 10:42 AM

All children are different when they TT, some are ready earlier and some later.

QUOTE
She is a heavy wetter and i have to routinely change her nappy at 6am, 9am,12pm,2pm and 6pm, lol, she wets through atleast once a week. She is NEVER dry.
Just a tip with this, my dd always woke up wet and was wetting the bed through the night. I use to buy homebrand womans sanitary pads and stick them into the nappy of a night time and she never wet through the nappy.

#22 new~mum~reenie

Posted 12 April 2012 - 10:53 AM

DS goes to a family daycare and readily offered to do the 'no nappy, just jocks/shorts' thing to keep training consistant.

Wee's were fine - pops were fine but REFUSED to wipe his own bum! Apparently he wanted to be 'big like my dad' to wipe his own bum - I was not planning on doing this till he was 32 years!! Even nights are pretty good, but I had to wipe his bum!!

Finally! This morning, after weeks of doing each wipe in turns, he wiped his own bum this morning!!

Oh, the joy and rapture!!!

He will be 4 in August! So it has taken a long time, but we got there original.gif

I should add, for us, we just had to stop using nappies - full stop. It was the only way.

I do wonder if, on the whole, disposable nappies do a disservice in the toilet training. Mum had all 5 of us toilet trained between 12-14 months. Even most MCNs have fleece layers to wick away the moisture... Where as terry squares/cotton you make the association between the urge and being wet quicker?

#23 roses7

Posted 12 April 2012 - 11:14 AM

My DD was just about 3 I think. I tried to start at 2y7m but she got sick so I had to wait.

Anyway it took about a week from memory before she was completely dry with no accidents during the day. As soon as she landed the first wee in the potty successfully I stopped asking or reminding her to go to the loo, I just left it up to her to manage and she did.

My DS was 2.5 and he initiated it because he wanted to be like his big sister.

Having seen 2 friends start "parent led training" with their 2yo DDs who were still having accidents a year later, I am glad I waited.

Incidentally both of my kids trained in the winter. I don't do the run around with a bare bum type of training, they just wear undies under their clothes. I do make sure the clothing is easy for them to pull up and down. Tracksuit pants are actually quite good for soaking up the wee before it hits the floor  biggrin.gif

#24 M1B2G

Posted 12 April 2012 - 11:41 AM

DS was a little over 3 years old...

DD will be 3 in May.  She has shown some signs but has lost interest so we have not pushed it...

#25 mumandboys

Posted 12 April 2012 - 11:46 AM

DS3 was 3 years 10 months before showing any signs of being ready. (prior to that he would do a wee on the toilet before bath, and that's it).

He trained in about 3 weeks.

I also got lots of comments about being lazy or whatever, but chose to ignore them having pushed a previous child into TTing and struggled with accidents for YEARS.






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