Jump to content

2yo biter starting at daycare


  • Please log in to reply
14 replies to this topic

#1 Mummyjane24

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:54 PM

Hi all,
I have twin boys who have just turned 2 and are starting daycare 1 day a week. My problem is that one of the boys bites his 3yo sister and twin brother when he becomes really frustrated. If this happens whilst he's at daycare and he bites another child what will happen? I am aware that I could be confronted by another parent but I have informed the Childcare Centre of this behaviour and they weren't phased by it. Are there alot of biters out there? I have no control over his biting when he's at daycare. At home he gets time out and reprimanded as well as having to apologise to his siblings. It doesn't happen unless he is seriously frustrated or over-excited. I am a little nervous. What have been your experiences?

#2 bubmakes3

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:03 PM

My DS has also just turned 2 and he has also just starting biting when frustrated or angry. It is usually myself and occasionally DH who cops it and he is removed immediatly (put down or take my hand away if we are holding hands)and made to apologise.
He has biten twice at daycare in the last month and again it is when he is frustrated - waiting for his turn and someone pushes in etc. The staff are aware and watch him now and remove him if its an escalating situation. He was also biten him last week and was quite shocked I think - he continued to say 'ow my arm Mummy' and rub or point at the mark for a couple of days afterwards - hopefully this will help with his own biting but I am not sure yet!
The staff insist its common and a result of inability to communicate wants and needs etc. We try and install the same techniques that they use and hope its a phase that will pass.

I hope your twins enjoy daycare!

#3 Leha

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:06 PM

My DS is a biter. He also pulls hair, hits and scratches. I was very concerned as when I took him last year before he started to get him used to the kindy he bit another child after only being there for 20 minutes.

I spoke to all of his teachers and they have never been worried telling me it is very common. Since he started there  has been quite a few incidents but he is getting better. They discipline him by removing him from the situation  and telling him no which is what I do as well.  I think just make sure you keep talking to his teachers, be consistent in telling him off for the biting and you should be ok.



#4 PurpleChicken

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:13 PM

My 21 mo DD is a biter.  She's bitten a few times, and they generally just remove her from the class and get her doing other things for a while to let her know it's not on.

She's also been bitten quite a bit at DC.  They never say which child did the biting, but just that they've informed the parents.  This saves parents confronting other parents over the issue.

As long as they know he's a biter they can keep an eye on him and watch for the signs.

#5 amesv

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:23 PM

[/size]My DS was a biter from 1 -3 years old, I started him atoccasional care when he was 2 as I thought it might help to socialise withother children and be disciplined by others too. The day care workers were veryunderstanding I don't think biting is really common but common enough theyweren't surprised by it and knew how to deal with it. I always had to sign aform informing me I was told my son had bit and the details leading up to thebite, and I believe the parent of the child my son bit had to do the same.

[size="3"]


#6 galitayia

Posted 23 April 2012 - 01:04 AM

I TO HAVE A BITER HAIRPULLER SCRATCHER AND SPITER HE IS ABOUT TO START DAYCARE FOR THE SECOND TIME TOMORROW BUT DONT WISH FOR HIM TO HAVE A BAD DAY BUT A REALLY GOOD DAY ..I HAVE NO-IDEA HOW TO STOP THIS AS HIS NOT AN ONLY CHILD HE HAS A OLDER BROTHER AND TWO OLDER SISTER'S ONLY ONE OF MY GIRL'S BITES .. IM IN NEED LIKE EVERYONE ELES ON SOMEHOW GETTING HELP OR ADVICE ON HOW TO STOP THIS !!! unsure.gif

#7 Lightning_bug

Posted 23 April 2012 - 01:52 AM

OP, most children go through the biting stage and unless it's chronic and he doesn't respond to the carer's intervention I wouldn't be concerned.

In our case when it happens we get an incident report sent home.  That's about it.  Most parents are understanding that it does happen and only get concern or upset if it goes on for a long period.

Trust the carers.  They have strategies and intervention techniques which they can put into place.  

OP, how is your little one's communication skills?  This could be off topic but with my son he had horrible frustration at that age so we taught him some basic sign language.  It made a world of difference.

#8 IShallWearMidnight

Posted 23 April 2012 - 02:05 AM

One of our friends sons does this, but the CC just reinforce gentle touching (hes in the baby room until june) and keep him away from the little ones.

#9 Bluenomi

Posted 23 April 2012 - 10:24 AM

We have a bite at daycare and DD is his favourite target  mad.gif He's not the best talker and gets bored easily so he either bites because he's bored and wants some attention or because he's angry and can't express it. They are working on it but it's been going on for over a year and he still does it. I can't wait for him to leave at the end of the year and leave DD in peace!

Both parents have to sign an incident report (seperate ones) and they aren't allowed to tell the parent who bit their kid. DD dobs him in though so I know who it is. Some of the other parents really don't like it and actually tell their kids to stay away from him.

#10 tazcan

Posted 23 April 2012 - 10:46 AM

QUOTE
Most parents are understanding that it does happen and only get concern or upset if it goes on for a long period.


I don't think most parents are understanding when their child is bitten!  The daycare won't tell the parent who bit their child but with DD I always found out because she was talking well at 2 and told me who bit her. I wouldn't have confronted the parent about it (and I'm sure doing so would be against the daycare's rules), but it still made me very cross and concerned. She was once bitten on the face and if the bite had been a tiny bit harder she would have had a scar in the shape of teeth on her cheek forever. It just takes one bad bite for a scar, and I imagine being bitten is extremely painful.

At least you have warned the daycare and hoepfully they can intervene and keep an eye on your DS, particularly if he's getting frustrated.

#11 ubermum

Posted 23 April 2012 - 10:54 AM

It depends who he bites. If it's KylieMinOgues kid, it could start another EB hissy fit. wink.gif

#12 Catmummy

Posted 23 April 2012 - 11:00 AM

My son went through the biting stage. I am under the impression most children do it. He bit me hard enough to draw blood a couple of times, and we had one incident at daycare where he bit a little girl, however the next week he was bitten himself. In the end he was bitten more often than he bit someone else.

I didn't flip out, I understand that's what children do, however some mothers get really unreasonable when their child is bitten in such a situation.

He'll grow out of it, I promise OP

#13 tazcan

Posted 23 April 2012 - 11:37 AM

QUOTE
I am under the impression most children do it


I don't think most children bite but it is common enough - probably one child in a room of 20 would bite (as a statistic), at least that is what I have observed. If a child is bitten they might start to bite back in retaliation. One little girl was always biting my DD at daycare. DD had never bitten anyone, but one day the girl bit her (for about the 10th time in a period of a few weeks) and DD turned around and bit her back - that was the last time she bit DD. (and secretly I was very pleased DD had bitten her back, which is bad of me, but at least it stopped the problem).

Edited by tazcan, 23 April 2012 - 11:39 AM.


#14 Xander2

Posted 23 April 2012 - 11:44 AM

My DS has been the 'bite-ee' and also the 'biter' at his daycare.  I had to sign an incident form both times as did the other parents.  it's a phase they go through (he's 3 now and doesn't do it anymore, only lasted about 3 or 4 months I think) It's frustration in most cases not being able to express themselves properly.

My DD (15 months) hasn't started biting yet (although she has been bitten at daycare) but I'm sure her turn will come.

Good luck OP  original.gif

#15 Lightning_bug

Posted 23 April 2012 - 08:14 PM

QUOTE (tazcan @ 23/04/2012, 10:46 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't think most parents are understanding when their child is bitten!


I'm not suggesting they like it.  Not the Kumbaya-style understanding but more the gritting your teeth and accepting it happens.  Once or twice.  Basically, they're not about to come running with pitch-forks.

If you hadn't been understanding you would have confronted the other parent, or worse still the child.  

If biting was a recurrent thing I'd be more angry with the child care facility for not dealing with the issue appropriately.  When DS went through his stage our CC facility was fantastic.  They organised a meeting with us; gave us some tactics so we were on the same page at home and; they took a detailed diary of DS's day to identify triggers.

A good CC has training to deal with the issue.  If they didn't, I'd be looking elsewhere.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Tot meets his heroes, falls apart with excitement

Two-year-old Quincy finished his potty training last week, and as part of his reward he was able to meet his idols.

Beautiful in our eyes: Georgia's story

I will never deny the fact that grief has a place when you give birth to a child who brings a set of circumstances very different to what you imagined. Because for nine months, I thought I knew my Georgie.

'It's been phenomenal': widower dad of quads thankful for support

There was nothing Erica and Carlos wanted more than a baby.

Vin Diesel names daughter after actor Paul Walker

The actor said there was "no other person" he was thinking about when he chose the name.

How midwives can help women who experience domestic violence

More than half of women who live with abusive partners experience violence during pregnancy.

Mum describes giving birth during Cyclone Pam

A new mother was told she must flee Port Vila hospital with her baby as Cyclone Pam bore down.

6 signs you're done having babies

There were a few signs I'm never going back to the land of maternity jeans, breast pumps and bassinets.

Marta Dusseldorp reveals breastfeeding cost her an acting job

Australian actress Marta Dusseldorp has revealed she was forced to withdraw from a Sydney Theatre Company production because a director did not approve of her breast feeding.

Female celebs (or their babies) with traditionally male names

Looking for a name that's a little bit different for a girl? Turn to names that have been traditionally used for males, as these celebs (or their parents) did.

'If you're anti-immunisation ... take a look at this picture of my son'

Greg Hughes is "an absolute shell of a man" as he and his wife Catherine struggle to come to terms with the loss of their newborn son Riley to whooping cough.

How an extrovert can raise an introvert

Introverts are often misunderstood as shy, and sometimes even rude. A timid child can be difficult to build rapport with, but it's important we nurture their sensitive natures.

Sheryl Sandberg's advice

'Choreplay': Help out at home to get more sex, Sandberg tells men

Forget foreplay. The new and improved route to intercourse is "choreplay" - it's good for your spouse, good for your house, and comes with the imprimatur of feminist du jour Sheryl Sandberg.

How to play with your baby

The first time your child learns a new skill at playtime is very exciting - for both you and your baby! Play is important to your child's development for a variety of reasons - here are some simple ideas for you to try at home.

I'm a single mother by choice

For me, being the best mother I can be means being a mum alone, at least for now. Thinking of my friends with inadequate partners, I wonder why more people don’t choose single motherhood.

Awkward wedding photos

Weird poses, surprise photobombs, bizarre editing: these are the wedding photos that should have never seen the light of day.

Four-week-old baby Riley Hughes dies of whooping cough

The mother of a four-week-old Perth baby who died after contracting whooping cough says her family has been left devastated by the loss of her "gorgeous, sweet" son.

Win a Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom prize pack

To celebrate the April 1 release of Holly's Magic Wand on DVD and Digital, we are giving away five DVD packs featuring the newest installment of Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom Holly's Magic Wand and many more hours of family entertainment! Enter Now!

Oh boy! Video shows family's reaction to baby surprise

Little Peyton Williams thought she was getting a baby sister named Charlee. But the two-year-old has had to settle for a doll dressed in pink after her baby "sister" turned out to be a boy.

How to help build up your baby's immune system

We all know that having a strong immune system is the best way to stay healthy – but what can we do to help it along?

'Nick, you need to call an ambulance': home birth mum's tragic death

A Melbourne mum who died after the home birth of her baby pleaded with her husband to call an ambulance because she felt she was going to die, the Victorian Coroners Court has heard.

When dads believe their baby doesn't 'like' them

Q: My two-month-old baby doesn't like me. He's perfectly content with my wife, but when I try to hold him, he gets upset and cries. I've backed off a little, thinking that he just needs a little time to get used to me, but that doesn't seem to be working. I'm starting to think I'm just not a very good dad. Is it too late for me to build a relationship with my baby?

When was the last time a stranger praised your parenting?

Wouldn’t it be great to get some nice feedback every now and then? After all, everyone likes to hear positive praise, particularly when it comes to parenting.

Special Ticket Offer, Save $8!

The Essential Baby & Toddler Show is back this April! Save $8 off the door price for a limited time only!

15 names on the verge of extinction

If you're looking to revive an older name, or don’t want anything near the top 1000 list, check out these rare monikers for your unique baby.

5 characteristics of great dads

It’s great to see a generation of dads who are more actively involved with caring, nurturing and loving their kids.

Why doesn't Australia have more breast milk banks?

When there’s no question that milk banks are important, why don’t we have more of them in Australia?

Carrie Bickmore announces birth of daughter

Television personality Carrie Bickmore has given birth to her second child.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Sign up to our 30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Sign up to receive 30 amazing tips and ideas for play with baby during the month of April and submit a picture or tip on our social wall for a chance to win an amazing Fisher-Price prize pack.

Man faces jail after giving woman abortion pill smoothie

A Norwegian man is facing jail after putting abortion pills in his ex-girlfriend's smoothie, causing her to have a miscarriage.

'He's a blessing': family of baby born without eyes

Jordy Jackson was born without eyes. He has anophthalmia, which affects one in every 100,000 babies born.

Win one of 5 Cadbury Easter Hampers

With Easter fast approaching, Cadbury are giving away 5 Cadbury Easter Hampers. Enter Now!

Super fit model Sarah Stage defends her pregnancy body

Model Sarah Stage has defended her pregnancy body after critics claimed her slim figure at eight-and-a-half months pregnant wasn't "normal".

Win a Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom and Peppa Pig prize pack

To celebrate the April 1 release of Holly's Magic Wand on DVD and Digital, Essential Baby and Entertainment One are giving away five bumper DVD packs featuring the newest installment of Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom Holly's Magic Wand and many more hours of family entertainment! Enter Now!

Why I post breastfeeding photos online

I love to take pictures of my children. In some of the pictures, my younger son is nursing.

The day I broke my baby

There are things I wish I didn't know. I wish I didn't know that companies make tiny braces, small enough to hold necks no bigger than a wrist.

The place just for dads of multiples

When a couple discovers they're expecting multiples, the dad can sometimes be almost forgotten in all the excitement and preparation. But one group offers a space just for dads of twins and higher-order multiples.

Brave mum calls for domestic violence law reform

A brave mum of two has shared details of the harrowing attacks she suffered at the hands of her partner in a bid to help other victims of domestic violence.

Why I had the new test for Down syndrome

Early last year I turned 35, and having just found out I was pregnant, I opted to have the new test for Down syndrome.

Geeky baby gear

If your family is more into Star Wars, gaming and the periodic table than most, you might want to check out these geek-chic baby items.

2015: the year of the sheep

According to the Chinese zodiac, babies born in the year of the sheep are creative and enjoy spending quiet time with their own thoughts.

Breakthrough genetic testing now available in Australia

Pregnant women will for the first time have access to locally analysed, accurate, non-invasive pre-natal genetic testing when the first Australian clinic to offer the services opens its doors next week.

Grandbabies: the babies born looking old

Not a day under 65 and a lifetime of struggle! That's the look of these newborns, who look adorably older than their real age. Social networking site Reddit recently featured user submissions of adorable grandbabies, here are our favourites.

Family kicked off flight after toddler seatbelt drama

An entire family was kicked off a Cathay Pacific flight when a misbehaving toddler refused to put his seatbelt on.

Stolen baby found after 17 years

A baby stolen from her mother's arms shortly after birth has been found through an astonishing coincidence.

53 creative pregnancy announcements

Announcing that you're expecting can be a time to express your creativity, sense of humour and imagination. Check out how other parents and parents-to-be have broken the news to friends and family.

IKEA hacks for the nursery and kids' rooms

Are you one of those that know the whole IKEA catalogue by heart? Love their stuff but want to personalise it? Here's some inspiration to help you realise the potential of IKEA furniture and fittings.

36 baby names inspired by food and drinks

A French court may have ruled out Nutella as a baby name, but that doesn't have to stop you from taking inspiration from the supermarket (or bottle shop). See what parents in the US have chosen for their delicious little ones.

Clever breastfeeding products

Check out this range of products designed to help make your breastfeeding journey more enjoyable, manageable and convenient.

 

Sign up now!

30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Receive a daily email from Essential Baby during April with great play tips and ideas, then submit your baby at play photos to our Playwall, Instagram or Twitter for your chance to win.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.