Jump to content

2yo biter starting at daycare

  • Please log in to reply
14 replies to this topic

#1 Mummyjane24

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:54 PM

Hi all,
I have twin boys who have just turned 2 and are starting daycare 1 day a week. My problem is that one of the boys bites his 3yo sister and twin brother when he becomes really frustrated. If this happens whilst he's at daycare and he bites another child what will happen? I am aware that I could be confronted by another parent but I have informed the Childcare Centre of this behaviour and they weren't phased by it. Are there alot of biters out there? I have no control over his biting when he's at daycare. At home he gets time out and reprimanded as well as having to apologise to his siblings. It doesn't happen unless he is seriously frustrated or over-excited. I am a little nervous. What have been your experiences?

#2 bubmakes3

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:03 PM

My DS has also just turned 2 and he has also just starting biting when frustrated or angry. It is usually myself and occasionally DH who cops it and he is removed immediatly (put down or take my hand away if we are holding hands)and made to apologise.
He has biten twice at daycare in the last month and again it is when he is frustrated - waiting for his turn and someone pushes in etc. The staff are aware and watch him now and remove him if its an escalating situation. He was also biten him last week and was quite shocked I think - he continued to say 'ow my arm Mummy' and rub or point at the mark for a couple of days afterwards - hopefully this will help with his own biting but I am not sure yet!
The staff insist its common and a result of inability to communicate wants and needs etc. We try and install the same techniques that they use and hope its a phase that will pass.

I hope your twins enjoy daycare!

#3 Leha

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:06 PM

My DS is a biter. He also pulls hair, hits and scratches. I was very concerned as when I took him last year before he started to get him used to the kindy he bit another child after only being there for 20 minutes.

I spoke to all of his teachers and they have never been worried telling me it is very common. Since he started there  has been quite a few incidents but he is getting better. They discipline him by removing him from the situation  and telling him no which is what I do as well.  I think just make sure you keep talking to his teachers, be consistent in telling him off for the biting and you should be ok.

#4 PurpleChicken

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:13 PM

My 21 mo DD is a biter.  She's bitten a few times, and they generally just remove her from the class and get her doing other things for a while to let her know it's not on.

She's also been bitten quite a bit at DC.  They never say which child did the biting, but just that they've informed the parents.  This saves parents confronting other parents over the issue.

As long as they know he's a biter they can keep an eye on him and watch for the signs.

#5 amesv

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:23 PM

[/size]My DS was a biter from 1 -3 years old, I started him atoccasional care when he was 2 as I thought it might help to socialise withother children and be disciplined by others too. The day care workers were veryunderstanding I don't think biting is really common but common enough theyweren't surprised by it and knew how to deal with it. I always had to sign aform informing me I was told my son had bit and the details leading up to thebite, and I believe the parent of the child my son bit had to do the same.


#6 galitayia

Posted 23 April 2012 - 01:04 AM


#7 Lightning_bug

Posted 23 April 2012 - 01:52 AM

OP, most children go through the biting stage and unless it's chronic and he doesn't respond to the carer's intervention I wouldn't be concerned.

In our case when it happens we get an incident report sent home.  That's about it.  Most parents are understanding that it does happen and only get concern or upset if it goes on for a long period.

Trust the carers.  They have strategies and intervention techniques which they can put into place.  

OP, how is your little one's communication skills?  This could be off topic but with my son he had horrible frustration at that age so we taught him some basic sign language.  It made a world of difference.

#8 IShallWearMidnight

Posted 23 April 2012 - 02:05 AM

One of our friends sons does this, but the CC just reinforce gentle touching (hes in the baby room until june) and keep him away from the little ones.

#9 Bluenomi

Posted 23 April 2012 - 10:24 AM

We have a bite at daycare and DD is his favourite target  mad.gif He's not the best talker and gets bored easily so he either bites because he's bored and wants some attention or because he's angry and can't express it. They are working on it but it's been going on for over a year and he still does it. I can't wait for him to leave at the end of the year and leave DD in peace!

Both parents have to sign an incident report (seperate ones) and they aren't allowed to tell the parent who bit their kid. DD dobs him in though so I know who it is. Some of the other parents really don't like it and actually tell their kids to stay away from him.

#10 tazcan

Posted 23 April 2012 - 10:46 AM

Most parents are understanding that it does happen and only get concern or upset if it goes on for a long period.

I don't think most parents are understanding when their child is bitten!  The daycare won't tell the parent who bit their child but with DD I always found out because she was talking well at 2 and told me who bit her. I wouldn't have confronted the parent about it (and I'm sure doing so would be against the daycare's rules), but it still made me very cross and concerned. She was once bitten on the face and if the bite had been a tiny bit harder she would have had a scar in the shape of teeth on her cheek forever. It just takes one bad bite for a scar, and I imagine being bitten is extremely painful.

At least you have warned the daycare and hoepfully they can intervene and keep an eye on your DS, particularly if he's getting frustrated.

#11 ubermum

Posted 23 April 2012 - 10:54 AM

It depends who he bites. If it's KylieMinOgues kid, it could start another EB hissy fit. wink.gif

#12 Catmummy

Posted 23 April 2012 - 11:00 AM

My son went through the biting stage. I am under the impression most children do it. He bit me hard enough to draw blood a couple of times, and we had one incident at daycare where he bit a little girl, however the next week he was bitten himself. In the end he was bitten more often than he bit someone else.

I didn't flip out, I understand that's what children do, however some mothers get really unreasonable when their child is bitten in such a situation.

He'll grow out of it, I promise OP

#13 tazcan

Posted 23 April 2012 - 11:37 AM

I am under the impression most children do it

I don't think most children bite but it is common enough - probably one child in a room of 20 would bite (as a statistic), at least that is what I have observed. If a child is bitten they might start to bite back in retaliation. One little girl was always biting my DD at daycare. DD had never bitten anyone, but one day the girl bit her (for about the 10th time in a period of a few weeks) and DD turned around and bit her back - that was the last time she bit DD. (and secretly I was very pleased DD had bitten her back, which is bad of me, but at least it stopped the problem).

Edited by tazcan, 23 April 2012 - 11:39 AM.

#14 Xander2

Posted 23 April 2012 - 11:44 AM

My DS has been the 'bite-ee' and also the 'biter' at his daycare.  I had to sign an incident form both times as did the other parents.  it's a phase they go through (he's 3 now and doesn't do it anymore, only lasted about 3 or 4 months I think) It's frustration in most cases not being able to express themselves properly.

My DD (15 months) hasn't started biting yet (although she has been bitten at daycare) but I'm sure her turn will come.

Good luck OP  original.gif

#15 Lightning_bug

Posted 23 April 2012 - 08:14 PM

QUOTE (tazcan @ 23/04/2012, 10:46 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't think most parents are understanding when their child is bitten!

I'm not suggesting they like it.  Not the Kumbaya-style understanding but more the gritting your teeth and accepting it happens.  Once or twice.  Basically, they're not about to come running with pitch-forks.

If you hadn't been understanding you would have confronted the other parent, or worse still the child.  

If biting was a recurrent thing I'd be more angry with the child care facility for not dealing with the issue appropriately.  When DS went through his stage our CC facility was fantastic.  They organised a meeting with us; gave us some tactics so we were on the same page at home and; they took a detailed diary of DS's day to identify triggers.

A good CC has training to deal with the issue.  If they didn't, I'd be looking elsewhere.

1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users


9 things I need to thank my parents for

You really don't realise everything your parents did for you until you find yourself doing them for your own children ... vomit catching and all.

The adventurous baby who's already putting safety first

When you're a baby, even getting off a bed and onto the floor can be a tricky procedure.

The story behind the love video that went viral

It is a quiet video, less than a half-minute long. It features no flourishes to speak of. It has no kittens doing kitten things. None of the things that often make a video go viral.

Anthony and Elle Watmough's joyous news as baby cleared of fatal condition

Rugby league star Anthony Watmough and his wife Elle have shared their joy at learning their unborn baby, who was thought to have Trisomy 18, was cleared of the fatal condition.

Win a family farmstay with Shaun the Sheep

To celebrate the Home Entertainment release of Shaun the Sheep Movie, Essential Kids and Universal Sony Pictures Home Entertainment are offering one winner and their family a holiday to a farm.

How I learnt to be a better friend

I may have lost that particular friend years ago, but I have gained so much from that experience.

What goes in the nappy bag?

It's far more than just a bag for nappies - it's the travel companion for your baby that should contain all the things you might need when away from home base.

The nature naming trend

The biggest joy of our daughter's name is that people really light up when they hear it (pun intended).

Win a Justine Clarke Pyjama Jam! prize pack

The Pyjama Jam! tour will see Justine Clarke returning to more intimate venues around Australia, creating the perfect comfy and cozy atmosphere for a PJ party.

Parents of baby born without part of his skull stand up to critics

When Brittany and Brandon Buell's son Jaxon was born missing much of his brain and skull, doctors said he only had days to live.

Baby plans are 'none of your business'

Emily Bingham had been asked about her baby making plans one too many times. 

Diet shakes to lose weight? Think again

Thinking of investing in meal replacement shakes to slim down ahead of summer?

Study offers support for cancer treatment during pregnancy

It is among the most delicate and difficult dilemmas in medicine: Should a pregnant woman who has received a cancer diagnosis begin treatment before her child is born?

Awards 2015: Vote now for a chance to win $2000

Vote for your favourite pregnancy, baby and toddler products for your chance to win your share of $2500 in cash prizes.

64 baby names based in nature

Looking for a baby name with a nod to nature, or one with an organic meaning? Check out our list to get inspired.

What coffee does to your body

That cup of Joe is just the boost your body needs.

Mum leaves triplets at hospital because she can't afford them

An illiterate and poverty stricken mother has abandoned her newborn triplets at hospital because she cannot afford to care for them.

I gave my daughter up for adoption - then tried to be her mum

The first time my oldest daughter called me 'Mum', she was 17.

Rainbow Babies lighting up the internet

A recent Facebook photo post is prompting widespread discussion of an emotional topic for many parents: rainbow babies.

The new wave of virgins giving birth

Dozens of young women have had virgin births after undergoing IVF in Britain, it has been reported.

'It sort of became an addiction': parents buying, reselling Bonds Wondersuits

Your baby might be crawling around in hundreds of dollars worth of clothing.

Adjusting your child to daylight savings time

A one-hour difference to the day is pretty big deal when you're little.

Born too soon: life on the margins of existence

The frontiers of life are advancing ever further into uncharted territory.


What's hot on EB

Stella McCartney honours mum with lacy bra

Fashion designer Stella McCartney has honoured her late mum, Linda McCartney, by designing a special bra for post-mastectomy patients.

Don't panic: A granddad midwife's guide for dads-to-be

Mark Harris has helped deliver 500 babies. And he's now telling fathers what to expect.

How to be a calm parent when you're feeling anything but

Being a calm parent takes a lot of work, sometimes more than is obvious to those around us.

The joy and isolation of being a stay-at-home dad

It's cool, kind of like a second childhood. I love him to bits and think, on average, I'm an okay dad. But I also want to talk about the other stuff.

How baby Teddy's short life is helping save thousands of lives

He may have only lived for 100 minutes, but that didn't stop baby Teddy from saving the lives of others.

A heartbreaking trail of missed chances in death of baby forgotten in car

A haunting reminder to stay mindful about babies in cars, especially as we approach summer.

What to do if your baby has tongue-tie

Tongue-tie can cause feeding problems. However once it is diagnosed, the condition can be easily treated.

How to move house without losing your mind

Some people move frequently, while others like to stay put. But everyone finds it stressful.

'She had nowhere to go': how new mum's life began to unravel

The birth of her first child should have been happiest of times for Campsie mother Phuong Cao, but friends say it marked the beginning of when her life began to unravel. 

Women giving birth to a son keep some of his Y chromosomes

It was an experiment doomed to failure - they were looking for male cells in female bodies. And their search was stunningly successful.

Photos: How babies fit in the womb

A gorgeous photo series shows babies in the first hours after their birth - as they were positioned in the womb.

Baby tries to persuade stubborn bulldog to walk, fails

We don't know what he's saying, but this baby has a very clear message for his bulldog pal: let's walk - NOW.

The best toddler gift ever? Nine gender-neutral play kitchen picks

Without a doubt, one of the best gifts for a toddler turning two or three is a play kitchen.

9 easy steps to improve your baby photography

With a few simple tips you can take your images from random happy snaps to lovely clean images that create beautiful lasting memories.



What are your favourite baby products?

The Essential Baby Awards are on now, and we need your help! Have your say on your top picks and you'll go in the draw to win a share of $2500.

Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.