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Parents drinking at school function
Is it ok?


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#301 Dionysus

Posted 13 April 2012 - 09:57 AM

Sarah, most ppl are asking you to explain why ppl would feel excluded if alcohol was served at a school function.

You are saying that in a public school more ppl would feel excluded (don't agree, but whatever)

But, what makes them feel excluded in the first place?  Why would they not feel welcome?

'Cos more public school parents are alcoholic and would feel bullied?    huh.gif

#302 Guest_~Karla~_*

Posted 13 April 2012 - 09:59 AM

Would anyone here seriously not go to a school event just because there might be someone having one or two alcoholic drinks?

I could understand feeling excluded by alcohol if there was a rule that you HAD to have an alcoholic drink before you were allowed to participate, but to feel excluded by the mere presence of alcohol? Really?

#303 BadCat

Posted 13 April 2012 - 10:10 AM

QUOTE (~Karla~ @ 13/04/2012, 09:59 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Would anyone here seriously not go to a school event just because there might be someone having one or two alcoholic drinks?


Yes.  I'm sure a couple of people upthread said exactly that.

So far I haven't seen one single argument in favour of prohibiiting alcohol at a school function that makes any sense to me.


#304 Guest_~Karla~_*

Posted 13 April 2012 - 10:18 AM

QUOTE (BadCat @ 13/04/2012, 10:10 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Yes.  I'm sure a couple of people upthread said exactly that.

So far I haven't seen one single argument in favour of prohibiiting alcohol at a school function that makes any sense to me.


Oh, I must have missed that. I can't imagine that sort of extremist attitude is particularly common though...

#305 Jane Jetson

Posted 13 April 2012 - 10:20 AM

Wow, I'm learning a lot from this thread.

Alcoholism is now defined as not caring if a school event is alcohol-free or not, and can be identified by people objecting to directives from people they don't know on the Internet.

"Want," "need" and "oh okay, don't mind if I do" are now synonyms, given the number of people still claiming that we desperately need a glass of wine to get through a school event if we accept the presence of alcohol at all.

The presence of a substance not consumed by others constitutes bullying and exclusion. I will thus stand up and complain about my victimhood next time there is avocado or Coke or anything with mushrooms served because I don't like those.

Working class people will feel excluded if there's alcohol present. Apparently. I don't understand this one either. I grew up working class and went to public school, and am now middle and send the kids to Catholic school with all us lushes, so do I feel excluded or not? I'm very confused.  tongue.gif

#306 Melidia

Posted 13 April 2012 - 10:57 AM

QUOTE
Yep. Lots. The "think as I think or there's something wrong with you" attitude is mostly coming from you.

You've also assumed that any clinical understanding of alcoholism precludes any direct experience. I've seen it too growing up, and it's quite far removed from what we're talking about here: having one glass of wine at a school function.

Again, it's not a case of "what's wrong with ya". It's a case of you deciding that you should get to make the rules about what everybody else does, and hysterically declaring us alcoholics because we simply don't agree with your stance.

For the record, I don't need a drink to get through a school function. Nobody here has said they do, apart from a couple of people who were clearly joking.


You know, there is nowhere in this thread that I have said that.  I don't expect people to think the same way I do.  I DO expect those who are undiagnosed alcoholics to react they way they have in this thread though.

I do understand alcoholism, both in the clinical sense and the personal sense.  The abject denial of the psychology of the alcoholic seen here is a huge sign that alcoholism is a poorly understood disease by the majority - still.  Having a couple of wines at a school function does not make you an alcoholic.  I agree with that.  It's the couple here, couple there, couple everywhere, to the point that you CANNOT attend a school function, or anything else for that matter, without a few under your belt, or bringing a bottle for social lubrication, that is pointing people in the direction of the alcoholic path.  People who are so damned SENSITIVE about the idea that someone observes their behaviour as being potentially alcoholic need to do some self-examination.  However, it is far easier to condemn someone who points it out than look at yourself, isn't it.

I don't get to make the rules about everyone else's drinking, and haven't attempted to.  However, I do have an opinion, which is that there is a time and a place for alcohol consumption and I really don't believe a school function is the place.  I am as entitled to express that opinion as anyone else here, whether you like it or not.

As for the 'jokes', they are in very poor taste.  Anyone who has lived through alcoholism would know that.

#307 FeralFerretOfDoom

Posted 13 April 2012 - 11:06 AM

QUOTE (RoxieRouge @ 12/04/2012, 10:25 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The alcoholic behaviour I am referring to is the belief that if you don't do as they do, or think as they think, then there is something wrong with YOU.  There is plenty of that in this thread.


Yes, an alcoholic may well have the attitude that you describe.

But equally, so may someone who has been told something they consider hysterical and/or irrational - such as; you are not allowed to drink coffee because it will set a bad example for the children and exclude the people who don't drink coffee.

Now, I may or may not want to have a coffee - in fact I may dislike hot drinks in general, but if someone came out and said something like that, I would react in a somewhat "WTF are you thinking" way.

#308 Aquitaine

Posted 13 April 2012 - 11:08 AM

QUOTE (RoxieRouge @ 13/04/2012, 10:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I DO expect those who are undiagnosed alcoholics to react they way they have in this thread though.


There are undiagnosed alcoholics in this thread? As evidenced by them not being upset about alcohol at school events? Oh boy.

#309 Expelliarmus

Posted 13 April 2012 - 11:16 AM

I don't drink alcohol (not ever, never had a drop in my entire life) and hold the same view that is being described as that held by those who are clearly 'undiagnosed alcoholics' ...

Did you know that it is possible to be seen with a drink in your hand at every social function - including among an entire family who do not drink alcohol - to drink pretty much constantly and yet NOT tick the boxes required to diagnose you as an alcoholic?

My brother is an alcoholic. I know it, my sister knows it, I think mum even knows it deep down although wouldn't admit it, but he has never been identified as one. Because there are some boxes he doesn't tick. He proudly states, with Jacks in hand that he's not an alcoholic.

Yet he can't go a day without a drink.

Figure that one out.



#310 threelittlegems

Posted 13 April 2012 - 11:26 AM

QUOTE (RoxieRouge @ 13/04/2012, 10:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I DO expect those who are undiagnosed alcoholics to react they way they have in this thread though.

I do understand alcoholism, both in the clinical sense and the personal sense.  The abject denial of the psychology of the alcoholic seen here is a huge sign that alcoholism is a poorly understood disease by the majority - still.  Having a couple of wines at a school function does not make you an alcoholic.  I agree with that.  It's the couple here, couple there, couple everywhere, to the point that you CANNOT attend a school function, or anything else for that matter, without a few under your belt, or bringing a bottle for social lubrication, that is pointing people in the direction of the alcoholic path.  People who are so damned SENSITIVE about the idea that someone observes their behaviour as being potentially alcoholic need to do some self-examination.  However, it is far easier to condemn someone who points it out than look at yourself, isn't it.


Isn't there a banging head against brick wall emotion somewhere?

RR, you may understand alcoholism, but you sure as hell don't understand 'normal' drinking. Your judgement is clouded by your experiences.

Can someone please call the APA and tell them to add - 'wants to have a glass of wine at school functions' to the alcoholic checklist. Put it on the top of the list, because if ticked yes, the subject is definitely an alcoholic. No need for any further questions.

Edited by threelittlegems, 13 April 2012 - 11:31 AM.


#311 Jane Jetson

Posted 13 April 2012 - 11:35 AM

QUOTE (RoxieRouge @ 13/04/2012, 10:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I do understand alcoholism, both in the clinical sense and the personal sense.  The abject denial of the psychology of the alcoholic seen here is a huge sign that alcoholism is a poorly understood disease by the majority - still.  Having a couple of wines at a school function does not make you an alcoholic.  I agree with that.  It's the couple here, couple there, couple everywhere, to the point that you CANNOT attend a school function, or anything else for that matter, without a few under your belt, or bringing a bottle for social lubrication, that is pointing people in the direction of the alcoholic path.  People who are so damned SENSITIVE about the idea that someone observes their behaviour as being potentially alcoholic need to do some self-examination.  However, it is far easier to condemn someone who points it out than look at yourself, isn't it.


Alcoholism is defined as a physical dependence on alcohol via daily drinking to the point where cessation would cause withdrawal symptoms. No physical dependence may mean pre-alcoholism, it may mean harmful or hazardous drinking in the long or short term and it may mean a bingeing problem, all of which are not alcoholism. This does not mean they are not problematic.

Nobody here is displaying alcoholic behaviour by not caring if somebody else has a drink at a social function or not.

I have just "had a look at myself" as you suggest and come to the conclusion that half a dozen glasses of wine a year probably mean I'm in the clear.

#312 threelittlegems

Posted 13 April 2012 - 11:41 AM

In any case RR, your definition of 'alcoholic' means that Howdo is an alcoholic.


















I rest my case.



Edited by threelittlegems, 13 April 2012 - 11:41 AM.


#313 Liv_FERAL_sh

Posted 13 April 2012 - 11:48 AM

Undiagnosed alcoholic because I don't think some parents having a beer at a school picnic will bring about the next apocalypse...now THAT little gem is going straight in my bag of WTF!!!

#314 BetteBoop

Posted 13 April 2012 - 11:55 AM

I went to my first school event last month. They had a bar even though the event only went for 3 hours.

TBH I was surprised that alcohol was allowed and that people wanted to drink. But if that's what people want to do and the school allows it, then fine by me.  

QUOTE (fancie @ 11/04/2012, 08:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
oh dear.

Get invited out much?


This made me descend into great guffaws of laughter complete with unladylike snorting - and I'm at work.

Thanks fancie. My colleagues probably think I'm p*ssed again.

QUOTE (RoxieRouge @ 12/04/2012, 10:25 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
If you had a relatively decent level of comprehension, you would already understand that it isn't the drinking I am referring to.  It is in fact the excessive "whats wrong with ya?!?!?!" posts that are coming from those who think drinking at school functions, indeed NEEDING a drink to get through a school function is 'normal'.  

The alcoholic behaviour I am referring to is the belief that if you don't do as they do, or think as they think, then there is something wrong with YOU.  There is plenty of that in this thread.

Having grown up with alcoholism I understand all too well what alcoholic behaviour is.  Far better than someone whose sole understanding comes from a DSM-IV manual I suspect.


There is no definition of alcoholism that applies to the behaviour you're suggesting. A difference of opinion doesn't imply mental illness or dysfunctional thought processes.  

It could be that when you grow up watching a particular type of behaviour, you tend to look for it. It may not mean it exists everywhere.



#315 BadCat

Posted 13 April 2012 - 12:20 PM

QUOTE
I DO expect those who are undiagnosed alcoholics to react they way they have in this thread though.


Once again, nobody is seriously suggesting that they can't get through a school function without some booze.  A few people joked about it.

Being in favour of people making their own decision whether to have a wine with their meal is not any sort of sign of being alcoholic. It is more a sign of acceptance that people should be allowed to run their own lives without reference to my personal choices.

#316 Mumsyto2

Posted 13 April 2012 - 12:42 PM

QUOTE (FrogIsAFrogIsAFrog @ 13/04/2012, 08:26 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Several weeks ago we attended a sleep-over at school which was a "family event".  DH and I didn't bring drinks and I was surprised at how many parents either didn't get the several memos about this, or blatantly disregarded it.  Despite this, there were no shenanigans but I was a little disappointed that these events can't just be all about the kids, and not our desire for a relaxing drink.

No wonder.  If I was made to sleep in a hall or what not with a school load of kids I would also require a 'relaxing drink'. Totally justified. Note, that would probably mean two drinks during the entire course of the evening/night and I would in no way be lurching around in bushes exhibiting the behaviour you describe below.  Actually not allowing me to have one or two in this situation would be exclusionary as there would be no way I would be sleeping in a school overnight crammed with god knows how many other adults and kids without it so I would not attend.  It sounds like something one would have to endure in the event of a crisis (emergency bushfire/flood accom or something) rather than something to do for fun which is 'all about the kids' so I am in no way surprised people ignored notes and took BYO in order to survive the ordeal if they felt it was expected they participate for the sake of 'school community'.

QUOTE (FrogIsAFrogIsAFrog @ 13/04/2012, 08:26 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A few years ago, there were several children lost and crying on school grounds in the dark, not being able to find their parents because their parents had nicked off to smoke in the bushes (drunk).  One child was locked in the toilet, hysterical because they couldn't operate the lock and their parent could not be found.  Children were seen drinking left over alcohol in styrene cups because adults had left them laying around and not disposed of them properly.  Parents drinking to the point they're incapable of taking responsibility of their children, let alone drive them home from said function.

I have never known a school community to carry on in this manner or indeed any individual at a school event so if this is the type of parent at the school and the way they imbibe alcohol and carry on then I would say a blanket ban on alcohol conumption at that particular schools events is warranted and the school did the correct thing by putting this policy in place. I would also go so far as to say that they ARE  most likely alcoholics given the reference they were drinking alcohol out of polystyrene cups as no normal person could be so desperate for a drink they are willing to drink out of those, you would just give it a complete miss.

Whilst parents at this particular school obviously cannot be trusted to behave appropriately when they have access to alcohol it does not mean that a blanket ban should then cover all schools where people have no issue with responsible behaviour if they choose to have a drink at a function, and of course others may choose not to which is fine and dandy also.

#317 roses7

Posted 13 April 2012 - 01:02 PM

Oh boy, what a thread!

I grew up with a father who was most likely an undiagnosed alcoholic and a mother who has 1-2 drinks most evenings. There is a world of difference between the 2.

My life experience taught me to be very wary of people who drink excessively and behave badly when drunk. It did not teach me that alcohol is an evil substance and that anyone who chooses to drink it in any quantity must automatically "need" it and is probably an alcoholic.

There is a staggering absence of logic evident here from most of the anti-drinking brigade, and therefore I will exercise my free choice to completely ignore them.



#318 Nora.

Posted 13 April 2012 - 01:13 PM

EB loves to over-react about alcoholism. I'm a 1-2 drinks 5 days a week gal. Hell, I'd love a drink at a school function they're so mind numbingly boring. But according to the moral police on EB, that makes me an alcoholic  rolleyes.gif



#319 Froger

Posted 13 April 2012 - 01:28 PM

QUOTE (fancie @ 13/04/2012, 01:16 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
This is so offensive.  Yes people do have a choice.  They have an option of applying to another school (albeit another public school) and that is a choice.  I know a great many people who choose one local public school over another local public school and I live in an area that is considered far less salubrious than Auburn, Guildford, or Lakemba!  People can choose the public school best suited to their needs and those of their families and in my education district very few requests for an 'out of area' enrolment are turned down.


Yes I suppose you're right. I guess that's why when my kids went to school in Sydney there was hardly a white child at their school. Leave all the "ethnics" to their ghetto.







QUOTE (fancie @ 13/04/2012, 01:16 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Everyone is welcome.  I suspect that those who feel excluded because some parents might choose to drink moderate amounts of alcohol at the event, would in all likelihood feel excluded even if alcohol was banned.  There will always be an excuse/reason why some people feel they are excluded.


Public schools in Australia are a very comfortable place for white people of culturally Christian background. The whole way school is organised is based around stuff that is comfortable and culturally appropriate for them. The school days, the school hours, the uniform, what is taught, how it is taught, who teaches, the food, the drink, the extra subjects and special activities. And because of this school is a very exclusionary place for a great many parents and students who are not of this background. Children like mine (Aboriginals or "ethnics") are forced to all the adapting. Which is unfair really as they are required by law to attend school. They pretty much feel excluded most of the time. They are not making "excuses". But so much stuff is just so inappropriate for them, yet they still get in there and do it. They already give up so much to try and do so much which is foreign to them to be included and try to get along with the school.

So if alcohol was served at school functions which weren't compulsary we would of course have a choice as to whether or not to go. We may say we didn't care, because we do say that about alot of things, as otherwise we are complainers trying to change the great Australian way of life, lol. And of course we want to be polite, so no one hates us anymore than they already do. So if we didn't go, it is just one more thing we feel excluded from. And if we did go we would still be excluded because all the people having just "one or two" glasses are not really wanting to talk to us anyway. Once they start drinking they just want to hang around with their mates being "jolly".


QUOTE (NinjahAlpaca @ 13/04/2012, 01:33 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
How are you excluded because other people choose to do something you choose not to?

I choose not to wear maxi dresses as I find them terribly unflattering and mostly foul.  I also choose not to watch Idol, because I think it's brainless and utterly inane.  I choose to not eat custard, because it is evil, and yet I have no objection to others doing all of these things, even around me and the children at a school event.

I don't mind if you speak terribly wrong English around my kids, I don't care if you choose to smack your child in front of me and my children.  I am ok with you eating non-free-range eggs where my entire family can see you doing so.  You can even eat kangaroo if you are so inclined.

Just because I have a personal objection to all of the above does not mean that I can't deal with you exercising your right to do any of them in my presence.  Even if my kids are there, although it's a close call on the cage eggs.

I would, if it seemed appropriate at the time, use this as an educational experience for my children.  Look, kids, there's someone smacking their child.  We don't approve of that and we think they're utterly sh*yte parents for doing it but aren't I the best mummy ever because I don't smack you and am clearly superior because I am capable of disciplining you without smacking?


Wow, just wow. Just as an example, my ex speaks nine languages. He may not speak the best of English. So nice of you to not "mind" him speaking his bad English if he does make the effort to overcome his shyness about his English to go to a school function at a school which his children are forced to go to by law. And yeah, so white middle class to object to eating Skippy. As I said before, schools are a place of exclusion for so many parents and children. We "ethnics" do all the adapting and no one else seems to do a thing to make schools more inclusive. We just have to fit in.


QUOTE (**Mel** @ 13/04/2012, 09:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Sarah, most ppl are asking you to explain why ppl would feel excluded if alcohol was served at a school function.

You are saying that in a public school more ppl would feel excluded (don't agree, but whatever)

But, what makes them feel excluded in the first place?  Why would they not feel welcome?

'Cos more public school parents are alcoholic and would feel bullied?    huh.gif


Hopefully have explained a bit above. original.gif Alot of kids have to take on a whole new culture at school and they do so, without complaining, and often struggle day after day after day. Yet people are upset because I merely suggested that giving up alcohol for a few hours at a school function may serve to be more inclusionary?

This should give you some idea of what at lot of non-White kids need to cope with at school when it comes to having to adapt.

Edited by SarahM72, 13 April 2012 - 01:48 PM.


#320 Julie3Girls

Posted 13 April 2012 - 01:47 PM

QUOTE
Public schools in Australia are a very confortable place for white people of culturally Christian background. The whole way school is organised is based around stuff that is comfortable and culturally appropriate for them. The school days, the school hours, the uniform, what is taught, how it is taught, who teaches, the food, the drink, the extra subjects and special activities. And because of this school is a very exclusionary place for a great many parents and students who are not of this background. Children like mine (Aboriginals or "ethnics") are forced to all the adapting, even though they are forced by law to attend school. They pretty much feel excluded most of the time. They are not making "excuses". But so much stuff is just so inappropriate for them, yet they still get in there and do it. They already give up so much to try and do so much which is foreign to them to be included and try to get along with the school.

You obviously have big issues with the school system. Although I'm not exactly sure how the school days and hours can be considered exclusionary based on enthic background ...

But, I guess my question is, if things are inappropriate for your culture at the school, do you get involved and try and change things?

Do you attend the P&C meetings, and suggest activities or school events that fit in with your culture, and to try and bring it into the school?  You could even suggest that alcohol be banned in some events if your school is one that does allow alcohol. I admit, I haven't actually seen alcohol at our school functions (at the school), only at the adults only functions outside the grounds.

Do you volunteer for the canteen, join the committee and get the menu added to, with items that would be more acceptable? Our school canteen has made a lot of changes recently, mainly because of a few mums who are willing to do the work involved, like making homemade foods, organising for Sushi dishes for example. I've read posts about the things some schools offer in their canteens, and there is an incredible range.

We have a strong multicultural focus, with events organised.

A school is a community, and the parents who are involved are what makes it what it is.  
You want the school to change, get in there and get involved. Be the organiser. Or at very least, be a willing helper and give suggestions.
Particularly in a school which has a high number of children from different cultures, that is an ideal situation where you could have the backing to make changes.

#321 Froger

Posted 13 April 2012 - 01:56 PM

QUOTE (Julie3Girls @ 13/04/2012, 01:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You obviously have big issues with the school system. Although I'm not exactly sure how the school days and hours can be considered exclusionary based on enthic background ...


For example, the school days and calendar are arranged around Christian holidays and days of worship and Christian norms which are quite difficult for some kids to work around. eg Kids of non-Christian background who have different needs are punished for skipping school if, for example they attend a funeral of someone interstate and it needs to take  a few weeks for cultural reasons, or some kids regularily skip Friday afternoons for non-Christian worship and are told off for wagging etc.

That's the problem. So many people just can't see the inherent difficulties in the school system for kids who are not of a certain background. The days, hours and calender truly are a difficulty for a lot of kids. Just because you can't see it doesn't make the problems go away. ACtually because you, and people like you, can't see it, it makes it more of a problem.

#322 Bam1

Posted 13 April 2012 - 01:56 PM

QUOTE (SarahM72 @ 13/04/2012, 12:50 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
And because that many parents do not get to choose to send their kids to a public school, especially in some of the more diverse areas like I have mentioned, I do think that school events should try and be as inclusive as possible.


I don't think anyone would argue that public (& private) schools should be as inclusive as possible but being inclusive does not mean ensuring that everything that happens is okay with absolutely everybody. It means ensuring there is a choice - a vegetarian option at the sausage sizzle, non-alcoholic drinks as well as beer and wine, ensuring some events are held at night instead of all during the day, respecting other's culture (this does not mean having to follow the rules of their culture though).

Some schools do this well others not so well but an alcohol ban is not going to make a school more inclusive than what it already is. I would dare say that at my DD's public school, which does not allow alcohol, is the most exclusive school I've ever seen, it is very uptight and does a good job at excluding kids who don't fit the white middle class mould (mine included). Part of this is because its always been quite "white" and not used to different cultures. I'm hoping my involvement in the P&C might help change this. If it doesn't I will have to consider moving my DD but its not a fault of the School systen just the particular school's history.

Edited by Bam1, 13 April 2012 - 02:13 PM.


#323 Bam1

Posted 13 April 2012 - 02:08 PM

QUOTE (SarahM72 @ 13/04/2012, 02:56 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
For example, the school days and calendar are arranged around Christian holidays and days of worship and Christian norms which are quite difficult for some kids to work around. eg Kids of non-Christian background who have different needs are punished for skipping school if, for example they attend a funeral of someone interstate and it needs to take  a few weeks for cultural reasons, or some kids regularily skip Friday afternoons for non-Christian worship and are told off for wagging etc.

That's the problem. So many people just can't see the inherent difficulties in the school system for kids who are not of a certain background. The days, hours and calender truly are a difficulty for a lot of kids. Just because you can't see it doesn't make the problems go away. Actually because you, and people like you, can't see it, it makes it more of a problem.


You can't be serious - we can't change the system for every single person's issues with it - it wouldn't function. I know the African side of my family do struggle with the system but to arrange it better for them would mean it wouldn't work for others.  I know my best friends who are Thai struggle to get their children to school on time but a 10am start would mean my children waste 4 hours before school even starts.

Even white christians might need to go to a funeral interstate and I'm sorry if you feel your child needs a couple of weeks off for cultural reasons then it is up to you to work around it rather than the school. Skipping is wrong not matter what the reason, a parent ensuring their child has an allowable absence for cultural/personal whatever reason is completely different.

As a PP has said schools develop their culture over time and it usually does reflect the area, Unfortunately the system can never be flexible enough to suit everybody but most do find that they can work with the school even if it does take more effort at times.

#324 Froger

Posted 13 April 2012 - 02:17 PM

I'm not saying change the system for every single kid. I'm just saying be aware of the difficulties some kids face, and just be aware who is doing the most adapting for who, before you start complaining about people not fitting in or whatever.

And skipping is only "wrong no matter what the reason" because someone else has dictated rules that work for some and not for others. Most kids of ethnic background do their best to fit in. But as I said before it is mostly a one way street in regards to who is adapting to what. By this I'm not meaning that it should be changed (God forbid anything is made easier for those annoying ethnics  rolleyes.gif ), but just meaning be aware of the numerous difficulties some kids face just in simply turning up for school during a week/calendar that is not suited to them.

#325 Julie3Girls

Posted 13 April 2012 - 02:17 PM

QUOTE
That's the problem. So many people just can't see the inherent difficulties in the school system for kids who are not of a certain background. The days, hours and calender truly are a difficulty for a lot of kids. Just because you can't see it doesn't make the problems go away. ACtually because you, and people like you, can't see it, it makes it more of a problem.

You know, there is a reason I, and people like me, can't see it. It's because it's not part of our background, our culture. And people like YOU don't bother to explain it.  Believe it or not, people are not mind readers, and we don't all instantly know everything cultural need from every different culture.

QUOTE
For example, the school days and calendar are arranged around Christian holidays and days of worship and Christian norms which are quite difficult for some kids to work around. eg Kids of non-Christian background who have different needs are punished for skipping school if, for example they attend a funeral of someone interstate and it needs to take a few weeks for cultural reasons, or some kids regularily skip Friday afternoons for non-Christian worship and are told off for wagging etc


Ok, school holidays are not just arranged around christian holidays.  The school year is broken into 4 terms. The long summer holidays in this country happen to fall at the same time as Christmas.  But the main reason for that long school holiday is due to the summer weather.

Yes, Christmas and Easter are holidays based on christian beliefs. But that is a grand total of 4 public holidays.

Not sure what you mean by being punished for taking off time for a funeral - that surely isn't just restricted to people of ethnic background. I have relatives interstate and overseas, so I would be in the same position if I needed to attend their funerals.
Same with taking weeks off school for whatever reason - you can arrange it. My SIL took her kids out for 6 weeks, she made arrangements to get work from the school for the children.

Regularly skipping Friday afternoons ... I can understand why the school isn't happy with it, and you surely can't expect every school to suddenly finish early on Friday to cater for it.
BUT there should be a way for these parents to work with the school to find a solution.

Edited by Julie3Girls, 13 April 2012 - 02:19 PM.





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'Is that baby yours?'

She is my daughter. I gave birth to her. I nurse her. But she doesn't have any of my genes.

Episiotomy in childbirth: not just 'a little snip'

Episiotomies have a place in maternity care – and can occasionally save lives – but should not be performed routinely.

Toddler aggression not caused by language delays after all: study

The logic was that children who don’t have the language to fully express themselves will lash out when they’re misunderstood. Not anymore.

Why we chose to adopt a child with Down sydrome

Everyone in foster care (and really in life) has something that makes them more vulnerable. We just know what our son's is.

Object of desire

Curvy mums make clever babies

Scientists appear to have discovered why women have evolved to have more curves than men – shapely thighs and bottoms lead to healthier babies.

'We'll make sure they know how much she loved them'

A first-time mum will never get to hold her four newborns, dying shortly after giving birth to the quadruplets.

The baby names NZ knocked back in 2014

A New Zealander has tried to name their baby Senior Constable but didn't get away with it - and numbering children is also a no-no.

How can you go into labour without knowing you're pregnant?

For most of us, the idea that a woman could carry a child to full-term without knowing she is pregnant is mind-boggling.

Will you get to the hospital in time?

Worrying your baby will be delivered by the roadside is a common concern for many mothers-to-be. So how likely are you to be caught short?

Video: Funny 'Lips Are Moving' parody just for mums

Meghan Trainor's song 'Lips Are Moving' was already a hit, but now it's been turned into a hilarious parody that is set to be very popular with frustrated mums everywhere.

Out with the clutter

Decluttering by the numbers: take the 30-day challenge

Forget the 5:2 diet - Twitter's 30-day declutter challenge will have your house back in shape in no time (well, a month).

Parents, don't be too hard on yourselves

We need to stop damning parents of today, and embrace their appetite for knowledge instead.

Is my baby normal?

There are chubby Buddha babies and there are thin, smaller babies. Neither are right or wrong, they are all 'normal'.

When an older sibling starts school

When one child goes to ‘big school’ and leaves the other behind, it can cause deep upset. Here's how to make the transition easier.

Stray cat saves abandoned baby

They say dogs are man's best friend, but one cat has proven felines can be just as devoted to their human companions.

How strangers are helping a mum's wish come true after her death

A mum of five, Liz Marquez wanted to breastfeed her premmie son for a year. So when she passed away suddenly, her friends - and strangers - stepped in to help.

Win an Octonauts prize pack

To celebrate the launch of Octonauts Live! Operation Reef Shield, a spectacular underwater adventure live on stage, we are giving away an amazing Octonauts prize pack to one lucky fan.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
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What's hot on EB

Stars help save choking babies

It's an important lesson to learn, but one that busy new mums and dads might overlook until it's too late.

New Girl star Zooey Deschanel pregnant

Actress Zooey Deschanel is expecting her first child with her producer boyfriend Jacob Pechenik.

16 times 'dad reflexes' saved the day

Of course, in some cases they may be the ones who actually got their child into a precarious position in the first place, but we'll ignore that for now.

Couple's 'non-traditional' pregnancy announcement goes viral

Knowing you are not the father of your pregnant wife's baby would usually indicate a rocky relationship ahead for traditional parents.

The trials and tribulations of identical triplet newborns

Pip Donnelly is still playing spot the difference with her newborn identical triplets, Isabelle, Georgina and Frankie.

Win an Octonauts prize pack

To celebrate the launch of Octonauts Live! Operation Reef Shield, a spectacular underwater adventure live on stage, we are giving away an amazing Octonauts prize pack to one lucky fan.

Earthquake baby thriving five years on

Jenny Alexis is lucky to be alive after spending four days buried in the rubble of the 2010 Haitian earthquake, but now she's a thriving five year old.

Please don't say I'm lucky because I was adopted

On the one hand I was having a regular life with friends and sports and sleepovers and school. But I was also always wondering: Did my mother love me? What was wrong with me?

An open letter to non-parents who offer advice on child-rearing

Kitty, when you’re the parent of my child you’re welcome to wade in with an opinion – but until then, I’d prefer you to have a supportive ear and a glass of wine ready.

Couple arrested over baby gun video

A US couple faces charges after investigators say they found mobile phone videos showing the woman's 12-month-old daughter putting a handgun in her mouth.

NSW Health dumps 10-year limit on frozen embryos

A 10-year time limit on storing frozen embryos that were created with donor sperm has been dropped by the NSW government.

How my happy-go-lucky husband became a monster

Sharan Nicholson-Rogers watched her husband change from a happy-go-lucky police officer into an unpredictable man prone to violent and emotional outbursts.

Dads-to-be experience hormonal changes, too

Dads-to-be experience hormonal changes in line with their pregnant partners, a new study shows.

'They were just doing their job': mum of toddler killed in police chase gone wrong

"They were just doing their job. I feel so sorry for them. It is all just too sad."

Miscarriages to be formally recognised by NSW government

Women who miscarry will be able to obtain an optional "recognition of loss" certificate as a formal recognition of their often heartbreaking loss.

Cafe cubby house 'too noisy' for neighbours

Teenage parties, domestic disputes, or raucous late night pubs are the things that usually come to mind when you think neighbourhood noise complaints.

Dad films baby playing with snake

Most parents would not consider a snake an appropriate playmate for their baby, but a US dad who filmed his daughter playing with a python has defended himself against criticism.

Clever breastfeeding products

Check out this range of products designed to help make your breastfeeding journey more enjoyable, manageable and convenient.

Win with The Boxtrolls

To celebrate the release of The Boxtrolls on 3D Blu-ray, DVD & Digital with UltraViolet, we're giving you the chance to win a Boxtroll stationary package and DVD.

 

School Term 1

Get after-school care sorted

Wait lists too long at OSHC? Use www.findababysitter.com.au to meet local nannies now.

 
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