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Not nice experience with dr
at checkup

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#1 Phoenix Blue

Posted 11 April 2012 - 11:58 AM

Just came back from a rather un-nice appt at the hospital with a doctor.

I'm 34w5d. First he said my children were making a mess (4 and 5 year old with colouring books on the floor) - It's school holidays - I had no choice but to take them - and they were fine.

Then he said they'd probably break my waters with this baby because he doesn't like women having babies accidentally at home like I did with my 2nd. He knows nothing about my 2nd labour yet he's already predicting things like this?

Then he said I was measuring very big (37cm) and was I stuffing myself with sugar? No more sugar or you won't get that baby out. I'm 161cm tall, and weigh currently 69kg - was 58 before getting pregnant so I've put on 11 kg. How accurate is the tape measure anyway? Surely if I'm eating too much sugar, I'd have GD problems or sugars in my urine?

All that doesn't sound so bad, I guess. It was just his whole manner and tone was rude and condescending and I just didn't want him near me. I feel terrible. He gave me an anti D shot and half of it dribbled down my arm... I asked if the next appt was for my strep B swab - and he said I seem to know too much about what's going on so that means I should stop having babies!  mad.gif

I've been booked to see him again in 3 weeks for the Strep B swab (will be 37 and 5 days then - is that too late?) but there is no way I want him taking a swab from me. I'm going to ring the hospital and try to change the appt so I don't see him.

This is the first time I've gone public, my previous two children I was private. This time I was suppose to be shared care but my lovely GP has gone on holidays for the next 6 weeks - great timing!

I'm probably hormonal - but the whole experience was just yuk and I just felt like crying after my appt - not reassured. I so hope he's no where near me when I give birth...

#2 Expelliarmus

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:01 PM

Ugh. I don't think you are being hormonal. If I had the guts I would have laid a complaint about him. Surely there's a way to request 'not him'? (I've not had any experience with public birthing so am not sure)

#3 meljb

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:07 PM

He sounds very unpleasant. I don't think you're being hormonal at all. Is it possible to see a midwife for your next appointment? Definitely try to change to a different dr for next time if you can't see a mw instead.

#4 sjl

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:10 PM

If you don't feel comfortable with him call the hospital and see whether there is anything they can do.  I had an umpleasant experience at my last ultrasound with funnily enough a pregnant woman doing it.  I stewed and stewed about it then got teary and thought buggar it i'm more stressed now than what i was going into the ultrasound appointment.  it turned out the person had had a few complaints and obviously they need to know these things as often no one else is in the room to see their bedside manner demonstrated.

#5 happygurl06

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:10 PM

I complained about an OB in public and I never had to see him again.  I refused downs testing and he kept  on at me about how horrible it would be to have a baby with disabilities.  Even said "do you know what they look like??" in a nasty tone.

#6 Mummy Em

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:14 PM

I definately ask to be shifted to a different team if I were you! Is he the OB consultant? If so he is the head of the 'team' who will be delivering your baby and even if he is a resi it means you could end up seeing him when you give birth. Personally I'd want him far away from me whilst in labour!

#7 vbos

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:15 PM

No, you are NOT hormonal, he is just plain rude.

I'd complain to the hospital and to the Royal Australian and New Zealand College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists (03 9417 1699 ).

He is just a rude pr*ck.

#8 lizb87

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:23 PM

He sounds incredibly and unnecessarily rude. I would simple call the hospital, say you were unhappy with his manner & do not wish to have him for future appts or the birth and change your next appointment. They must have different obs. Unfortunately being public you probably will just get whichever obs is rostered on at your birth, but if it is in your notes that you dont want this guy, then at least there is a chance you might get someone different if they are available.

If he has annoyed you this much at an appointment, imagine having him being the one present at your birth! Definitely worth kicking up a stink over.

#9 follies

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:26 PM

QUOTE (Phoenix Blue @ 11/04/2012, 11:58 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I've been booked to see him again in 3 weeks for the Strep B swab (will be 37 and 5 days then - is that too late?) but there is no way I want him taking a swab from me. I'm going to ring the hospital and try to change the appt so I don't see him.

I just had my swab at 36+5 and was told that was pushing it. Also I did the swab myself at home straight beforehand. No one else needed to touch me. It takes 3 days to get the results back and he should be taking it into account.

I have been using exclusive midwives care at my local public hospitals birth centre and if I received that kind of treatment I would be complaining as well.

#10 new~mum~reenie

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:26 PM


Def complain and ask to see another doctor.

Even if he is having a BAD day, surely he can be civil and professional.

Then he said they'd probably break my waters with this baby because he doesn't like women having babies accidentally at home like I did with my 2nd. He knows nothing about my 2nd labour yet he's already predicting things like this?

His opinion or medically indicated? Surely precipitous labour, although fast, isn't an indication that something is wrong, but more everything is 'right' and body is super efficient at birthing?

#11 new~mum~reenie

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:31 PM

info on how to make a complaint..

But the world isn't perfect, and like any provider of a service, doctors make mistakes. These mistakes can range from unprofessional behaviour to incompetence or simply a momentary lapse in judgement where the doctor makes a poor decision.

It's important not to accept poor treatment, but to make a complaint about it. This doesn't just benefit you the consumer, it's also in the community's interests because it means there's less likelihood of someone else experiencing the same problem in the future.


#12 CherrySunday

Posted 11 April 2012 - 12:39 PM

What a jerk sad.gif

Everyone else has given good advice, but I'd think that at near 35 weeks, a measurement of 37cm is fine - I was 2 weeks behind all the way last time, and this time I'm 1-2 ahead depending on who takes the measurment...

#13 Liadan

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:03 PM

No, you're not being unreasonable or hormonal, the Dr was out of line.

The measurement is a guideline, it isn't accurate. Having said that, if he was REALLY concerned, then he would have sent you for an ultrasound (which is what happened to me at about 36-37 weeks, the Dr said it's not unusual to measure "wrong" by the measuring tape, but she just wanted to be sure).

Put in a complaint, don't let this bad experience linger in your mind or it'll stress you out, my first Dr's appt at the hospital was HORRIBLE, I left in tears. Had a big cry about it to my mum, we ended up going back and speaking to the head midwife, who was just lovely and put my mind at ease.

If you don't feel comfortable seeing him, then let them know, ask to see someone else. You are completely within your rights to refuse to see him, and you can refuse to have him treat you.

#14 Liadan

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:05 PM

QUOTE (Phoenix Blue @ 11/04/2012, 11:58 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Then he said they'd probably break my waters with this baby because he doesn't like women having babies accidentally at home like I did with my 2nd. He knows nothing about my 2nd labour yet he's already predicting things like this?

You could have responded with "oh, I was actually PLANNING on having this baby at home"

His reaction would have been priceless, I'm sure.

#15 niggles

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:12 PM

What a jerk. I think if I felt that uncomfortable I'd request to see someone else.

(I also did my own swabs. My doctor just sent me into the loos with the swab and had me hand it in at reception after the appointment.)

#16 Xiola

Posted 11 April 2012 - 01:18 PM

I agree with everyone else...he sounds like a complete jerk and not someone I'd want taking swabs!

#17 Phoenix Blue

Posted 11 April 2012 - 02:51 PM

Thanks for all your replies.
if he was REALLY concerned, then he would have sent you for an ultrasound

This is what I thought too.

I just rang outpatients and spoke to the lady on the desk. Have changed my next appt to a female dr. She didn't seem to worried about it - I got the impression that perhaps it happens a lot with this dr (not wanting to see him!). I did ask why I couldn't see a midwife but there seems to be something on my file saying to see a doctor. My 2nd son was born with a heart condition so that is probably why, but I've had an extra scan this pregnancy and it all seems fine on the heart front.

Thanks again for the reassurance that I'm not over-reacting. I'll think about whether to make a complaint or not. I kind of just want to forget about the whole thing now that I don't have see him next time.

#18 Guest_Buy Me A Pony !_*

Posted 11 April 2012 - 03:18 PM

What a douche. My Dr gave me the Strep test to do myself.

Why are other people mentioning ultrasound? OBS has said there's little point in US at this later stage. I'm now getting some other type of test in place of the scan.

#19 Chelli

Posted 11 April 2012 - 03:37 PM

Oh you poor thing. I had a similar experience with an Ob and they were the only option within 600km, so I was stuck with them. Luckily GP's delivered where I was, and I wrote out a birth plan to say this Ob was not to go near me unless there was an emergency, and was not to be left alone with them under any circumstances.

#20 mks81

Posted 11 April 2012 - 03:43 PM

I had horrible experience with midwife not doctor....she was elderly and a bully. Ended up having to leave hospital early with c-section. I wish I had known back then (I was 22) that I could have asked for her not to be near me.

#21 Banana Pancakes

Posted 11 April 2012 - 03:50 PM

What a t*at! Im so glad that you changed your next appointment to another dr OP.

Try not to let him get to you (as hard as it may be). Have some chocolate and a warm bath and forget about the silly old goat  wink.gif

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