Two years of TTC
, Apr 10 2012 09:16 PM
6 replies to this topic
Posted 10 April 2012 - 09:16 PM
The last two years of our life has been taken up with the thought and effort of falling pregnant. The total joy we felt 2 1/2 weeks ago when that little stick read positive was amazing. It had been a long time coming after having a miscarriage in 2010 and we were really starting to think it would never happen.My world fell apart again at 7 am this morning.The bleeding was not severe, but all the same the world stopped spinning. After a frantic phone call to my amazing husband who turned the car around and came home, off to emergency we went.After what felt like forever my blood results came back with my hcg level at 236. Last Wednesday they were at 257 and 24 hours before that only a low 170. Even though the initial levels were low I still believed this baby would make it because it was wanted do much.I was sent home to 'wait it out' and told to organize an ultrasound for early next week. At the time I just said mm ok, but now I've thought about it I'm really upset that woman who have just lost their baby are treated like its just a bloody nose and not a life altering sad event. I'm hurting and I'm scared and now I have to worry about booking an ultrasound to see if I need a d&c. I asked if the ultrasound would be. For seeing if by chance I haven't miscarried only to be told its a spontaneous abortion and there will be nothing there.I feel for everyone who has ever lost their baby and I truly wish some doctors out there had a bit of compassion.
Posted 10 April 2012 - 09:26 PM
I am so sorry for your loss
I agree with you about the lack if tact or compassion some women receive, it impacts so much on their situation. I remember when I lost my DD at 18 weeks that there was a woman who went through a similar ordeal who delivered her stillborn child in a toilet in an emergency department at the same time. My heart just broke for her and I often think about how she recovered from that. It would be so much harder if medical practitioners showed little compassion.
I hooe you are surrounded with lots of love and support and that time is gentle for you. There are a lot of wonderful members here who were a tremendous support to me, and I'm sure you will receive lots of support through your journey.
Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:54 AM
I'm so sorry for what you're dealing with right now OP. Please, please be gentle with yourself and surround yourself with people who will love and support you. Your DH sounds wonderful.
After our m/c ten days ago I've been overwhelmed by all the love and support we've got from people close to us - but I agree, sometimes doctors just don't seem to get it. I switched GPs as my original one was so unsympathetic about my first m/c.
Chelli is right - there are some wonderful people here who really do get it, and who've been wonderful when I just needed to vent out feelings.
Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:09 AM
I was sent home to 'wait it out' and told to organize an ultrasound for early next week. At the time I just said mm ok, but now I've thought about it I'm really upset that woman who have just lost their baby are treated like its just a bloody nose and not a life altering sad event.
So true. OP, I'm very sorry you've been faced with this awfulness, m/c is just horrible. And I agree that women aren't given enough care and compassion by some
medical staff when facing a m/c. When I started bleeding at 8 weeks and then again 16 weeks, I was told by a number of Emergency dept doctors that "yeah, the pregnancy just isn't viable" and to go home and wait it out. WTF??? How about phrasing that awful info a little more gently, dear Doctor??! And how about giving me some kind of info pack about what to expect and what to do?? I was bawling my eyes out in Emergency at 16 weeks, and the (female) doctor couldn't have been more disinterested in my impending loss. And then when I did lose him, I had "retained product" that caused more bleeding. The terminology and compassion regarding m/c needs to be significantly improved, in my opinion.
Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:43 AM
OP I totally understand what you are going through. It almost made me feel sometimes that because I was so early (7.5 weeks) that it wasn’t so bad. Do they realise what you go through in that one week wait before you get your ultrasound. They don’t tell you what to expect, what’s normal, what isn’t.. I started bleeding bright red blood (not period type blood) and sat there wondering if I should see a DR, should I go to the hospital, my OB was on holidays so I couldn’t talk to him, eventually I was put through to a midwife... It was really, really hard not knowing what to expect, what was happening, and even though I did have my husband he wouldn’t accept it was all going bad and told me to stop being so negative until we had the ultrasound later that week. As we had one ultrasound when I first started bleeding and it showed our bubba with its little heart beating away measuring a week behind.. We had been trying for a long time too so I know how unfair it feels.
I did come across some lovely doctors through some of it and was told up until you hit 9 – 10 weeks you should likely pass it naturally with no problems at all. My GP did recommend a follow up ultrasound though to check all the tissue had passed. So maybe ask about that.
Posted 11 April 2012 - 02:37 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss. The public hospital system has alot to answer for, in how they deal with m/c's. They can be uncaring & down right insensitive.
Take care of yourself, but if you can't 'wait it out" then go back & demand some attention.
Posted 18 April 2012 - 03:17 PM
So sorry for what you have been through. We have lost 3 pregnancies over the yrs. 2 were miscarriages and one there were medical issues where we couldn't continue. It's a sad time and I think no matter what is said by the professionals helps. We have had comments like, the fetus must have been damaged, it's not really a baby at this point so try again, don't be upset miscarriages happen to a lot of people etc all unhelpful. I hope u have some family support to lean on
1 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users
Bonds and Disney fans with babies to buy for will be celebrating this news. Bonds and Disney have just released collaboration Wondersuits.
Since the 1980s, the Italian town of Ostana had not seen the birth of a single baby.
''I've delivered calves, lambs, dogs and cats, but nothing like this.'' This 'Super Gran' calmly peeled the amniotic sac over her great-grandson's head before discovering the umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck ... twice.
It's something that can be taught as early as possible and reinforced as they get older and more mobile - even from toddlerhood.
Meet the brand new understated chic model from Bugaboo.
It's been two and a half years since Heather Clark's seven-month-old son Lukas passed away.
One minute your productivity is skyrocketing and the next you're sitting there trying to focus – just like that you draw blank, your brain, mush.
Guess what? Despite not pushing him out, I cried, and my heart skipped, and I felt the rush of love and pride when I saw him for the first time.
For parents, having a child with microcephaly can mean a life of uncertainty.
Here are a few 'other' baby firsts you may not have been expecting, but you'll want to be ready for.
My son was born on the 1 July 2014. It's a fabulous birthday, don't you think? Not only does the first of July ring in a new financial year, but it also means we've hit the year's half way mark.
A naturopath whose treatment of a baby boy allegedly led to the infant being severely ill has pleaded not guilty to charges against her.
A teary-eyed Andy Murray promised pregnant wife Kim he'd be on the next plane home after his turbulent two weeks at the Australian Open came to an end.
A small boy in the US has struck up a quacking good friendship with an unlikely companion ... his pet duck.
Researchers have found that, contrary to prior belief, caffeine does not cause health-threatening heart palpitations.
I've always been one of the most maternal women I know.
For some couples you either both want to know the gender of your unborn baby, or you don't. For others, it's not that simple.
Tough new "no jab no play" laws could hurt children who have not been immunised due to family dysfunction, poverty, or poor access to medical support, experts warn.
Airlines and cruise companies across the world are offering refunds or travel credits to pregnant women who are scheduled to visit countries struck by the devastating Zika virus.
Not all women will require medication, but many will. And there isn't and shouldn't be any shame in that.
Labor frontbencher Penny Wong is used to to hearing arguments against same-sex marriage. But for Australia's most prominent gay politician, one hurts more than others.
Some things in life are inherently served with a big scoop of fun: balloons, bubbles, cupcakes to name but a few, but exercise?
She wanted a fresh colour for 2016, but instead she got chemical burns.
A Perth family has thanked US surfing "legend" Kelly Slater after the star saved a mother and a young toddler from "a freak wave" in Hawaii.
Tech giant instigates massive international recall of power point adapters due to risk of electric shock.
It's impossible not to share this little boy's excitement about the alphabet.
Like all tired parents, Monique and Kyle Ruppel were looking forward to the day their 15-month-old daughter Celia would start sleeping through the night.
An Australian mum who has shared the ups and downs of carrying quintuplets has welcomed her five babies into the world.
It was all too much excitement for this dad.
The way parents respond to their child's babbling can shape how their infants communicate.
The World Health Organization announced that it will convene an emergency meeting about Zika.
Baby Ebony was repeatedly failed by the agencies tasked with her protection before her horrific death at the hands of her father, South Australia's deputy coroner says.
Thirty-eight weeks or 39? Non-medical factors are pushing women to have elective caesareans earlier than official guidelines - and hospitals are playing along.
Two police officers delivered more than a traffic fine by the side of a busy Melbourne road yesterday.
One Direction's Louis Tomlinson has posted the first picture of his baby boy, Freddie, on social media.
Get your free ticket to the Essential Baby & Toddler Show and save $20 - register online now!