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How important is it for kids to have their own rooms?
Looking for a new house

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#26 QueenIanthe

Posted 04 April 2012 - 09:20 AM

I don't think it would be a problem with a four bedroom. I have five kids in a 4 bedroom house. I think that by the time your older daughters need their own rooms then your younger two girls will still share pretty happily.

#27 Soontobegran

Posted 04 April 2012 - 09:22 AM

QUOTE (steppy @ 04/04/2012, 09:18 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It is important for kids to have their own rooms when they are older (teens)

It isn't really. It can and does work. Our kids are the best of friends, they all succeeded at school, university and life and always shared rooms.
It is a first world problem. original.gif

#28 steppy

Posted 04 April 2012 - 09:27 AM

QUOTE (soontobegran @ 04/04/2012, 09:22 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It isn't really. It can and does work. Our kids are the best of friends, they all succeeded at school, university and life and always shared rooms.
It is a first world problem. original.gif

It is a first world problem for sure.

#29 Bel Rowley

Posted 04 April 2012 - 09:30 AM

I would have thought kids sharing a bedroom is one of those things that comes part and parcel with a larger family. In cities at least, I'd be shocked if families with 4+ kids didn't have at least a couple sharing a room, there aren't that many 5+ bedroom houses out there that would be affordable for families!

I agree with STBG that the requirement for kids to have their own rooms is a recent phenomenon. I liked having my own room as a teenager, but my two sisters (who were closer in age) shared well into their teens quite happily.

#30 Ingrid the Swan

Posted 04 April 2012 - 09:34 AM

QUOTE (soontobegran @ 04/04/2012, 08:52 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It isn't really. It can and does work. Our kids are the best of friends, they all succeeded at school, university and life and always shared rooms.
It is a first world problem. original.gif

I disagree.

For some people it might be a "first world problem" but for some people, like me, having privacy, security and a place to have time out without interruption is an urgent personal need.

Plus there's the allegation of fairness. Kids don't understand why their siblings get to have their own space and they are forced to share. Trust me, by the time I got my own room, I already had a pretty big case of middle child syndrome.

Plus there can be legitimate mismatches in personality. My sisters are both social party animals, I liked to study. We couldn't have shared a room in our teens for that reason.

#31 MickeyBoo

Posted 05 April 2012 - 09:07 AM

I think it depends on the childs individual personality and personal needs. My other kids are all fine sharing and enjoy it, but eldest DS has anxiety issues and likes his own space in his own way, so he gets worked up if someone has moved his stuff around. He shares with his younger brother but his younger brother only uses the room to sleep in and isn't getting into anything else, so there's no problems, but as they get older and he has to 'split' his space more and there's the risk of his things being disturbed, then there would be problems for him.

All of my kids get on fine, share and play together in the main areas of the house with no major issues, and enjoy each others company, but DS in particular needs his own private space and even the thought of someone having something in 'his space' gets his anxiety rising, it's not something he can control.

My sister and I when growing up were also at odds with sharing, she was 6 years older than me and we are completely different personalities, we fought like cats and dogs and sharing really damaged our relationship in the long run, it wasn't until we were both 'grown up' out of home, and having our first children that we started finding common ground again. So while I have no issue with kids sharing, even into their teens, I do think that if someone asks for a space of their own then it should be able to be available to them. There are a hundred other uses for bedrooms in houses if they don't end up getting used as sleeping areas too, sewing rooms, study rooms, hobby rooms, music rooms, media rooms etc etc etc

Edited by MickeyBoo, 05 April 2012 - 09:09 AM.

#32 mokeydoke

Posted 05 April 2012 - 09:45 AM

We would get more out of more space and a pool than bedrooms, which are only used for sleeping.

Plus if it's your forever home, do you really want all those extra bedrooms for the rest of your life?! laughing2.gif

Here my boys share, and my girls have their own rooms. DD1 needs her space, and I can't imagine her sharing very well tbh.

Growing up in a 5 bedroom house with 7 kids, we rotated having our own room. Every 6 months (or so) we moved and had our own room for 6 months laughing2.gif Luckily I was the second youngest so didn't have to do that too often before other kids started leaving home and I got my own room for good wink.gif

#33 Illiterati

Posted 05 April 2012 - 09:55 AM

OK for brothers and sisters to share a room up to about 12. As they head into puberty they probably need a little more privacy - so I would do boys in one room, girls in the other (but up till then I would room them by age).   Nothing wrong with same sex siblings sharing a room till they leave home.

#34 Another one

Posted 05 April 2012 - 10:05 AM

FIL shared a 6m x 2m room with his 4 brothers until they each started moving out as they got married, his two sisters shared another room and his parents always kept a "guest room".  They have always been the best of friends and a very close knit family.

My FIL then lived in the same house with his wife and DH and his two brothers shared a room until they moved out while his older sister had a room to herself.  My DH and his brothers all get along really well to this day.

DH moved out when we met and moved into the other house on the farm (he was 31) and now that we are maried and ILs have retired we live in the main house.  We are having 2 kids only so they will not need to share  - they would share if we had more kids though.

My younger sister and I shared until I was 16 and she was 15 and while we had fights like any sisters they were the same fights we each had with our older sister who had her own room.

I think it's fine to share if the house with less rooms suits your needs best.  Also as another PP said do you really want all those rooms when the kids leave?

#35 KristyMum-

Posted 05 April 2012 - 10:14 AM

My first choice would be no pool.
then what the running costs/design/eco/solar etc are of the house

bedrooms would come somewhere after that.

original.gif  good luck!

#36 Nofliesonme

Posted 05 April 2012 - 12:13 PM

We are about to have this issue. Each child gas there own room, my new bub baking will mean someone has to share. Well my kids all want to sleep together anyway so I think it will be fine.

#37 sophiasmum

Posted 05 April 2012 - 04:22 PM

Kids having their own rooms is v.important to me, so the 1st house would be a deal breaker for me despite the other positives. So unless you plan to add room/s then I wouldn't take it. As for the 2nd house, you can always add a pool if that is what you want.

#38 poodle may

Posted 05 April 2012 - 09:43 PM

Thank you for all your replies. It's given me a lot to think about. Especially from those who have older children/ teenagers.

Our thoughts are that we would really like to have the option of the children having their own rooms from late primary/early high school.

Because there will be nearly 8 years from eldest to youngest we should be able to manage that as DD1 will be moving out before DD3 and 4 reach those ages.

As for the pool, we understand it is a risk with having such young children, but feel that with proper fencing, supervision and care it is something our family would greatly benefit from. We already have a spa and the children love using it.

We have since found another house which ticks both boxes. Has a pool, but also enough bedrooms. Will go and have a look at it and see what happens.

Thanks again for your advice. Much appreciated.

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