Jump to content

Toddler not able to self settle
Sleep School?


  • Please log in to reply
4 replies to this topic

#1 Praetor VitaeChel

Posted 30 March 2012 - 04:02 PM

My DS has never been a good sleeper. We ended up having to co-sleep most of his first 6 months. He started getting a bit better for a while, but has reverted lately (prob due to house move). We can spend 2 - 2.5 hours every night trying to settle him into his bed. He sleeps in a big boy bed now and can get up. He does so - continuously. He also throws tantrums and destroys things in his room. We have tried controlled ignoring, putting him back, night lights and we are down to lying in bed with him and rubbing his tummy, singing etc until he falls asleep. This can take an hour or so on it's own and is exhausting. I end up doing it most of the time as DH is losing patience (he is a great dad, but I think he is suffering some feelings of rejection as DS has always been a daddy's boy and lately has been calling out for me).

I can't keep it up as I am getting to uncomfortable with pregnancy and also making my sore back a whole lot worse.

DS is VERY active and is a bit delayed in his speech (seeing speech therapist in nearby hospital and he is improving, she has suggested he goes to Pediatrician in same hospital for further testing due to over activeness). He gets along well with others, but is not a great eater and recently has started throwing massive tantrums. We have tried dropping day naps, but he is just too tired. We now restrict nap to one hour (it can take an hour to get him to sleep and if he won't sleep he has quiet time). Lately he has fallen asleep on my lap or shoulder during quiet time if I stay with him.

Once asleep (atm that is happening around 10pm) he will sleep until 7am around 4 days out of 7. The rest of the time he is up and climbing in our bed between 2 - 4am. I know he should be sleeping about 12 - 13 hours, but we are lucky if he is getting 10 hours. It is obvious he is tired most of the time from his behaviour.

I have done Positive Parenting classes, followed books and advice from Maternal health nurses. Have reached the conclusion we need more help. I have been given the number of Tweedle in Melbourne (we are 2.5hrs away, but nearby sleep school can't help).

Has anyone taken a Toddler to sleep school? What kind of fees will we be looking at?

*edit due to sleep deprived spelling.

Edited by vitaechel, 30 March 2012 - 04:03 PM.


#2 ubermum

Posted 30 March 2012 - 04:15 PM

Maybe I am mean, but I would put a gate on his bedroom door and leave him to it. If he destroys things, I would remove them. If he only ends up with his bed, blanket and pillow in his room and everything else removed or secured then so be it. Without stimulation, distractions and attention, he will tantrum or get so bored he falls asleep. If he doesn't fall asleep in his bed, it doesn't matter. So long as he is in his room. Currently, his methods are working. He has your full attention for hours. He is big enough to know you are still there and he hasn't been abandoned. My girlfriend did this exact approach but she shut her child's bedroom door and latched it so they couldn't open it. I prefer the baby gate so they can hear you and don't feel totally isolated, but can't get out. Her son used to fall asleep behind the door within 30 minutes.

#3 Praetor VitaeChel

Posted 30 March 2012 - 09:10 PM

He is perfectly capable of climbing over a baby gate unfortunately. We have moved into a rental (just sold house) so adding a lock to the door is out of the question. We have tried controlled ignoring, but he will happily put himself in danger (climb up shelves etc) to get attention and that is unacceptable. We can't remove everything from his room as we just don't have that option. We already have locks on fridge and any dangerous cabinets after I caught him having a midnight snack one night.  rolleyes.gif

On the bright side - Tonight DH put him to bed and for the first time in a loooonnnnggg time, it only took 30mins. We varied our night routine. I gave him food at around 5pm (this was a suggestion from Parenting class - feed earlier to get see if we can get more food in him) then we went to the pool for some swimming for about 40mins. This also allowed me time to exercise and relax while DH played with DS.

We gave him a bit more dinner when we came home - which for once he devoured and then started on bedtime routine with DH completely in charge (I had a bad headache and there was no way I could do the bed routine tonight).

Unfortunately, this is not something we can do every night, but I am relieved we have at least one night of peace.

#4 ubermum

Posted 31 March 2012 - 11:07 AM

I wouldn't waste your money on further sleep schools then op. I went to Tweddle and they will give you very similar advice to mine. If it is too hard to remove distractions and dangers from your child and keep him in his room, there is not much they can do to help. I guess he will eventually grow out of it.

#5 Riotproof

Posted 31 March 2012 - 08:54 PM

I'd be pursuing the paed.




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

11 things that will happen when you're breastfeeding

After having three children and various degrees of success feeding them all, there's one thing I can tell you: virtually nothing will go as planned.

Surgery for baby born with a tail

A baby born with a tail has had it removed after doctors feared the birth defect might cause long term damage to his lower body.

When 'skin to skin' becomes a family affair

An adorable photo of a little boy and his dad enjoying skin to skin contact with newborn twins is melting hearts everywhere.

35 hilariously weird 'top tips'

Who would have thunk it? We never knew there were so many uses for feminine hygiene products. 

Pregnancy skin woes: acne, dry skin, itchy skin

Here are some of the most common skin complaints in pregnancy and how to tackle them, face on.

Watch this fun dance class for babywearing dads

Is there anything sexier than a babywearing dad?

Parents, this is how to cut grapes to avoid choking

One mum has learnt a harrowing lesson about the best way to cut grapes to make it safe for toddlers and little kids to eat.

When your kids have totally different temperaments

Sometimes it has felt like whiplash parenting. She perches watchfully while I vacuum; he tries to climb on and go for a ride.

How do our stress levels influence our baby?

Since having my second baby a number of people have commented on how placid, content and settled he is and, similarly, many have commented on how this is a reflection of how I am with him.

Separation anxiety isn't just for kids

Despite its prevalence, most doctors tend to be reluctant to diagnose adult patients with separation anxiety.

A charm bracelet, a boy, and my beliefs questioned

I was staring at the face of my son, realising that my once steadfast decision to be open minded was quickly unravelling at the seams.

Why I'm so grateful for Hayden Panettiere's PND honesty

There are baby steps and giant leaps forward. But there are steps backwards, too. And, oh, how they can hurt your heart.

The heartbreaking story of little Moko

The mother of 3-year-old Moko Rangitoheriri said she should have picked up on the signs. {Warning: distressing content}

Kate Beckinsale and teen daughter recreate birth photo

Kate Beckinsale has recreated her daughter Lily's birth photo, 17 years after she was born.

The adult-size stroller you'll want to test drive

It's one of the biggest baby related purchases they will make, so it makes sense that parents-to-be get a chance to road test a stroller.

Pregnancy announcement shows the reality of IVF

It's a long way from baby booties or bump shots people have become accustomed to in social media pregnancy announcements.  

Soleil Moon Frye welcomes fourth baby

"Punky Brewster" is a mom again, for the fourth time. Soleil Moon Frye announced the birth of her baby boy, Story, on Instagram Wednesday.

Mum breastfeeds baby found abandoned on the street

A woman has been praised as a "beautiful mother" after breastfeeding a baby which had been abandoned at the side of a street. 

A birth with a difference: the 'natural caesarean'

We've shared stories of gentle caesareans before, but a new video shows a new option called a 'natural caesarean'.

Baby name inspiration by music genre

If you're all about the music, then you'll need a musical name for that baby. We've got all the lists for you by music genre.

Giving effective instructions to toddlers

One of the most common errors made by parents is in how they give instructions to their children.

 
Advertisement
 

Top 5 Articles

Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

The babies who are one in 70 million

Bethani Webb was excited to find out she was pregnant, but the first time mum did not realise she was carrying four babies not one.

Cafe offers breastfeeding mums a free cup of tea

A Sydney cafe is offering breastfeeding mums free cups of tea in a bid to show support for the right of women to nurse their babies wherever they choose.

To snip or not to snip? When the decision is not clear cut

Jamie Oliver, who considered a vasectomy, is to be a father again. A fellow dad reflects on his own decision 11 years ago

Doctors stunned by rare twins born almost six weeks apart

To everyone's surprise, Kristen Miller "kept doing better each day", keeping her second baby safe.

Baby book ideas for modern parents

Before my son was born I was given a lovely baby book full of blank pages waiting to be filled with weights and heights and first words.

The adorable smile of a baby seeing his mum clearly for the first time

There is no doubt seeing their child smile for the first time is an unforgettable moment for parents everywhere.

Mum tells how toddler 'nearly hung himself' in cot mishap

When Alison Johnson put her 18-month-old Caleb down for a nap, she had no reason to believe her son was in any danger.

Babies are still switched at birth? Yes, it can happen

All my panic and tears aside, my biggest question looking back is about the kind of security measures used in the maternity ward.

Doctors slammed for taking selfie with newborn

Everyone who visits a mum in hospital in the days following childbirth wants to get a photo with the new baby.

ergoPouch Twosie Sleepsuit for winter breastfeeding

Finally, there's a way to keep warm while breastfeeding through winter.

Health check: How long does sex 'normally' last?

What to do with this information? My advice would be to try not to think about it during the throes of passion.

When breastfeeding sucks: fixing common problems

From niplash to tight boobs, biting to milk supply issues, Pinky McKay looks at common breastfeeding issues and how to solve them.

10 things I've learnt in my first six months with twins

Six months on we're all still alive, and the more we get to know each other the easier the days become.

Mum's loving kiss leaves baby fighting for life

Kirsty Carrington thought nothing of giving her newborn son a kiss, little did she know it would leave the baby fighting for life.

When doing chores is your new 'me time'

After children, 'me time' looks a little different.

Get going: 14 travel strollers for families on the move

A stroller can make or break travelling with a baby or toddler. Here are 15 great single travel stroller options.

10 ways toddlers are terrific

It always pays to remind yourself of how terrific toddlers can be - they're little like this for such a short time

 

Vintage Toys

The toys of your childhood

Take a trip down memory lane with these vinage and retro toys that you may have had in your childhood or your parent's childhood.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.