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My Vent.
That is all.


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#1 Peridot

Posted 30 March 2012 - 12:24 PM

I thought I'd put this here, because unless you've been big, are big etc, it's hard to know where I'm coming from!

Size Vent
I am sick of my size! Granted I have done well, going from 135kg the day before my youngest was born January last year, to 104kg now. Granted it does take a long time to lose weight, no quick fixes etc.

Shape Vent
BUT I hate my shape!!!! I have amazing legs.. Toned, lovely muscles, lovely skin, granted there's a little bit of fat on them, but otherwise they are great. It's just everything from my stomach overhang upwards, is fat! Most of my 50kg left to lose is in my stomach!! It's gross! It overhangs way past my girl bits, and if it weren't for my stomach, I could easily fit into size 14s. I need a 20 for my stomach, and a 14 for my legs! It's impossible finding pants that look good, because what fits at the waistband, is so baggy and unflattering around my thighs!

Exercise Vent
I wish there were spot-fix exercise solutions! It sucks that there aren't.

Shape Vent #2
My arms are ok, albeit, fat. But they're not massive to the point I will need surgery to be ok with them at my goal weight. My boobs sag, I think this is my fault as I didn't wear a supportive bra for my last pregnancy.. Spending the majority of the time either braless (around the house) or wearing a sleep-bra when going out somewhere. Mainly because I was too big to find a bra that would fit that didn't cost much (we were paying off a lot of debt, and thankfully now are debt-free and have savings!). So this I can handle.

Cosmetic Surgery Vent
But right now, I have very high hopes that I will need a tummy-tuck and a boob lift/implants when I do get to my goal weight of 59kg, which is perfect for my 162cm (5'3) height, and my small bone structure. I wouldn't mind so much, except that I am SCARED to death of being under general anesthetic! I have never had it before and I really don't want to!! I will also want a tubal ligation as I have massive anxiety over getting pregnant again. As it is we use the pill (three alarms set every night in 5min intervals around 9pm so I don't forget!) and condoms, and I still get worried and do a test every month!! So all three procedures would have to be done at once, which they should do right?

Placing the Blame Vent
I also have hang-ups to my mother for letting me get fat in the first place! Before you say anything, my GP has also said numerous times that I have her to thank for it, my sister too. But now at my age (just turned 24) I am too old to be blaming my mother, and I need to take it on as my own problem, and am fixing it.

My Life in Weights Vent
But my whole life has been focused on my weight. I have photos of me from 1 year old, twice the size a normal sized 1 year old should be. At 6 years old, massive double chin, huge belly, again, twice the weight I should have been. At 11 years old, nearly 70kg. At 15 years old, 92kg. At 18 years old, 110kg. At 23 years old, 135kg.
It isn't medical, my GP has ruled everything out. It is just food based. Growing up on junk food, and no exercise.

Back to the Point Vent
Back to the point of my vent I guess. ARGH.. I want to be small like I was designed to be! For the first time in my life. Is it really so much to ask?
I am so desperate to see what I was designed to look like! I want to see my ribs when I lay down, I want to feel my hip bones.. I want to see my spine protrude when I bend over forwards.. I want to see my jaw bone, I want to see my collar bones.. I want to see my girl bits without having to pull up my stomach and contort myself sad.gif

End of Vent.





#2 PatG

Posted 30 March 2012 - 12:28 PM

Just wanted to let you know that your vent has been heard!

#3 4WD_Baby#1

Posted 30 March 2012 - 12:35 PM

Well done on your weight loss!!!

One question, will they let you get a tubal ligation at 24? My SIL wants one after 5 kids and she is 36 and they wont let her. Could you try the Mirena?

#4 Peridot

Posted 30 March 2012 - 12:41 PM

QUOTE
Just wanted to let you know that your vent has been heard!

Thank you original.gif

QUOTE
Well done on your weight loss!!!

One question, will they let you get a tubal ligation at 24? My SIL wants one after 5 kids and she is 36 and they wont let her. Could you try the Mirena?

I'm not sure if they'll let me, but by the time I have got down to 59kg, and maintained for a year, I will be around 26. So given my anxiety over pregnancy, surely they'll consider it? I have looked into the mirena, but I really don't like the idea of a device inside my uterus!!
I had two cesareans, the last one with a lot of problems healing, and scars adhering to each other, and the chances of everything not going to plan are pretty high even if we did want another bub. So hopefully they'll let me! DH is younger than me, he is 22 at the moment, and I doubt they'd let him have a vasectomy!

Thank you though original.gif

#5 Mumsyto2

Posted 30 March 2012 - 12:42 PM

QUOTE (Quartz @ 30/03/2012, 12:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Cosmetic Surgery Vent
But right now, I have very high hopes that I will need a tummy-tuck and a boob lift/implants when I do get to my goal weight of 59kg, which is perfect for my 162cm (5'3) height, and my small bone structure. I wouldn't mind so much, except that I am SCARED to death of being under general anesthetic! I have never had it before and I really don't want to!! I will also want a tubal ligation as I have massive anxiety over getting pregnant again. As it is we use the pill (three alarms set every night in 5min intervals around 9pm so I don't forget!) and condoms, and I still get worried and do a test every month!! So all three procedures would have to be done at once, which they should do right

Probably not.
They involve different specialist and I struggle to imagine how this would work as they don't play 'tag team' in this regard.
You would most likely be looking at 2 differnt ops.

Well done though on the weight loss so far, amazing !!!!

#6 Jingle Flea

Posted 30 March 2012 - 12:45 PM

And could you try counselling for the pregnancy related anxiety in the meantime?
Which might also help the anxiety over the GA.

#7 Peridot

Posted 30 March 2012 - 12:46 PM

QUOTE
Probably not.
They involve different specialist and I struggle to imagine how this would work as they don't play 'tag team' in this regard.
You would most likely be looking at 2 differnt ops.

For real? Oh damn.. More stress sad.gif

A tubal ligation is keyhole surgery isn't it? Maybe they might use twilight sedation instead of a full on general? Keep my hopes high?

QUOTE
And could you try counselling for the pregnancy related anxiety in the meantime?
Which might also help the anxiety over the GA.

Thank you, I'll look into it original.gif Might be a big help before the operation!!

#8 Tennasee

Posted 30 March 2012 - 01:31 PM

could you try those suckyinny pants (shape fitters or whatever they're called)? and perhaps a size 14 or 16 jean with the tummy stretcher belt things that you wear when you are pregnant?

#9 Sancti-mummy

Posted 30 March 2012 - 02:12 PM

Not from this section but just wanted to say good on you for your weight-loss so far!!

I would also get some counselling on your anxieties - and probably a bit of general as well, only because I have had weight sagas at both ends of the scale, and one of my big pitfalls is feeling everything will be "all right" at a magic number, only to realise that this isn't always so.

#10 Jingle Flea

Posted 30 March 2012 - 02:32 PM

It is true, you can lose weight thinking life will suddenly become better, but in some cases life stays the same, you just fit smaller clothes.
You also have to work on body attitude and other areas of your life. But being skinnier certainly can help with your confidence of course!


#11 steppy

Posted 30 March 2012 - 02:37 PM

That would be so annoying - I feel for you. Congrats on your huge achievement of losing over 20 kilos and best of luck with your future battle!

#12 123tree

Posted 02 April 2012 - 08:31 PM

First of all I can really understand your vent.  You are working so hard and doing so well, but sometimes working so hard can feel so exhausting.

I think that maybe you should stop and pat yourself on the back about what an amazing job you have done so far.

Aside from that I think that if you maybe (just putting it out there as I am no expert) stop focusing on the operations and just focus on the little steps to achieve your goal.

What I am trying to say I'm sure that when you reach your goal you will be feeling a lot more emotions so don't focus on something now when you will be in a totally different place emotionally in a couple of years.

Also my SIL had her tubes tied at 27.  If you really want it done (as she did) just shop around with doctors.

#13 Alacritous~Andy

Posted 02 April 2012 - 08:40 PM

QUOTE (Quartz @ 30/03/2012, 12:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Shape Vent
BUT I hate my shape!!!! I have amazing legs.. Toned, lovely muscles, lovely skin, granted there's a little bit of fat on them, but otherwise they are great. It's just everything from my stomach overhang upwards, is fat! Most of my 50kg left to lose is in my stomach!! It's gross! It overhangs way past my girl bits, and if it weren't for my stomach, I could easily fit into size 14s. I need a 20 for my stomach, and a 14 for my legs! It's impossible finding pants that look good, because what fits at the waistband, is so baggy and unflattering around my thighs!


I just wanted you to know that I have heard your vent, and you are not alone, particularly this part.  I describe myself to DH as feeling like a chicken - little legs, big body, even bigger breasts. sad.gif

One thing I found when losing weight was how surprised I was at how unevenly I lost weight.  I am still a long way from goal (and it will be a while, as I am pregnant again), but I did notice that my trouble zones seemed to stand out MORE when I first lost the weight, but then as I kept losing, they gradually caught up.   I went from looking really apple shaped, to eventually getting a real waist, and now I feel really top heavy and like my arms/shoulders are massive.  So please don't despair, you might find that as you keep dropping weight that your whole shape begins to change.





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