Putting baby to bed awake
Has anyone successfully done this?!
, Mar 23 2012 07:21 PM
62 replies to this topic
Posted 28 March 2012 - 02:27 AM
My little girl (10 weeks) does go down awake most nights and will drift off quickly and mostly without any fuss. We don't stand there patting her etc - she is reliant on her dummy as comfort and it usually only takes a couple of sucks once it is plugged in and she is out to it!
She is put to bed as soon as we notice she is getting tired. If she gets overtired and overstimulated she tends to fight sleep and get really cranky, wakeful and upset.
We don't do a feed, bath, bed routine as she loves her bath so much that it overstimulates her if she is tired. I made the mistake of bathing her just before going to the doctor today right at the time she was wanting to sleep and ended up with a screaming baby who dropped off just before we were called in for her immunisations. Cue one overtired and miserable baby until she conked out this evening.
It depends on her level of tiredness as to whether she is wrapped or not. If she is a little overtired, wrapping seems to help calm her. If she goes to bed just as she is getting tired, she can drift off without being wrapped. She seems to startle more when overtired.
I have found that knowing when my child is starting to get tired is the key. No overstimulation at night helps and a washing machine/dryer/something rhythmic can help them drop off.
I have put all three of my children down to sleep awake and all have slept well and with little fuss. Even now, at 9yo and 11yo my older children show tired signs and if I send them to bed then, they drop off almost immediately.
I'm loving my little one's sleeping patterns at the moment. I'm getting 8-10 hours a night uninterrupted sleep. Well, at least I would be if I ever went to bed at a reasonable hour
Posted 28 March 2012 - 07:29 AM
Yep I did this.
DD1 was about 12 weeks old before I started doing this, but with DD2 I started at the 6 week mark and I just did what I did with DD1 as that worked well.
So for us it was wrap tightly, put in cot, put white noise / music on, put dummy in, walk out. At first I sometimes had to keep going back into replace the dummy every few minutes for up to an hour, it really does take a bit of patience. But I never left them to cry it out or anything. A slight grizzle sometimes, but never if it started to escalate.
The key is consistency. Whatever approach you take, you just need to make sure its the one you always take. It wont be an instant change, these things are gradual. If baby seemed squirmy I would sometimes pick up for a quick cuddle, rub their back, and usually they'd let out a burp or fart. Then they'd be laid back down in cot, dummy in, and out I'd go.
After about a week all i took was putting them in the cot and putting the dummy in once, saying "night night" and that was it. No having to go back in.
I'm a huge fan of this method because it meant during the night if they woke unsettled all I'd have to do is go back and put the dummy back in and they'd go back to sleep for a few hours.
Posted 05 April 2012 - 09:01 AM
We found with our first as with all new mothers fnding their feet that consistancy was the key. We rocked our DD to sleep to start with and then after a while of doing that she'd wake up when she realised we were'nt there, so we had to try and stick to the putting her to bed awake and re settling her when she'd cry sometimes it took up to an hour hour and a half, but she near a year old when we did this too. We learnt the hard way by not sticking to the same thing and it just confused her. At 3 she is a great sleeper now and goes to bed no prob's. At 6 weeks they are so small, so don't stress aout rocking them to sleep some nights or extra feeds. Read your child too, as every baby is different. Our DS who is now 6 months old was a different story we put him to bed awake now and have for about the last 2 months, he lets you know when he's tired by grizzling rubbing his eyes hands at his head and arching his back. To start with as a newborn we swaddled him which worked. At night he's better, will fall asleep in 5 after we put him down, cause he knows it's bed time. During the day, he'll protest but I just keep going back in there and tuck him in give him a kiss and try not to engage in too much conversation or eye contact and he settles more quickly. Doesn't cry just yells LOL. if he's hungry too he won't settle. Good luck.
Posted 05 April 2012 - 09:08 AM
Pat used to have a bottle then go into the cot awake and he would go to sleep. We have done this since he was born.
Posted 08 April 2012 - 11:21 AM
This has to be the toughest part so far - concerns about sleep have been with me for a while now. My son is almost 9 weeks old atm (first child too) and is learning about settling. First week or actively trying to put him down and settle was the hardest, he would scream the house down for us to hold him and rock him to sleep which is what he was getting prior to 6 weeks. We do not leave him to cry it out, we sit with him and shush / pat now but it took a few weeks to see results at all. I think it is progress when previously we would put him down and he would scream to be picked up, now he is able to lie there quietly for a bit before crying out if he is still unable to settle to sleep immediately. The conclusion i have come to is pretty much what the other mums are saying, that it takes time to learn to self settle for most babies. Persistence for the last 3 weeks has seen for us some results, I don't think that any child is born with the ability to self settle and even then it is tempered by personality of the child and other issues along the way. I wish there were some reference manual but we have had to experiment and try different things to see what works. Not sure that it helps you but we put baby to bed either awake or drowsy, sometimes he goes down easily and other times it takes more effort to settle, but that's life with babies! Agree that consistency is definitely the key, also don't chop and change what you are doing immediately as this results in inconsistent approach. I'm working my way through it myself so it's all a learning curve for me and baby too.
Posted 12 April 2012 - 12:08 AM
QUOTE (Shady Lane @ 23/03/2012, 07:57 PM)
Because we like to make more work for ourselves?
Don't have to get snarky. What she was saying (as far as I can tell) is why don't more mums try this method? I'm not a mother myself but you probably already know that some people think that they already know all there is to know - so don't bother researching to find out.
Posted 12 April 2012 - 01:38 AM
i just boob to sleep.
shes out like a light in a few minutes, and apart from an occaisional 3am feed (until we nightweaned at 18months) sleeps till its morning.
works for us.
Posted 12 April 2012 - 12:13 PM
i just boob to sleep.
shes out like a light in a few minutes, and apart from an occaisional 3am feed (until we nightweaned at 18months) sleeps till its morning.
works for us.
This approach is great if you have one who stays asleep. If you have one who wakes every hour or so overnight you have to start teaching self settling or you go bonkers.
Posted 12 April 2012 - 12:18 PM
My DD would never sleep unless I rocked her to sleep. It took time, but she eventually went to sleep and it was the only way I could get her to sleep. It lasted until she was 6 months. IMO, you are not teaching your 6wo to self settle by letting it cry for 40 mins while you pat it. Not all babies know how to self settle or learn how to self settle until much much later. Do what you can to get him to sleep, rock him for an hour if you have to. He has to sleep some time if there's nothing actually wrong with him. Watch for when he's tired, then start trying to get him to sleep.
Posted 12 April 2012 - 12:22 PM
My baby is nearly 3 weeks old and she pretty much falls aslpee on the boob all the time,
Edited by anon4000, 16 March 2013 - 07:41 PM.
Posted 12 April 2012 - 12:35 PM
I think it works for some babies and not others.
My DS would not go to sleep on his own if you put him in the cot awake. He would scream and scream and scream. I would wrap, pat, ssshhh and all the rest and nothing worked. I rocked him to sleep in my arms till he was well over 12 months.
My DD on the other hand did learn to go to sleep in the cot by herself from about 6 weeks. I would just wrap her and pop her in and off she would go. I thought it was a miracle.
Posted 12 April 2012 - 12:50 PM
My little boy is just over 5 months and he has always needed to either be rocked or fed to sleep. However in the last week or two I have been able to put him in bed drowsy (we still feed before bedtime) but not asleep, and he shuffles and fidgets for a few minutes before drifting off.
I have recently stopped going in to resettle him mid-nap as it only seems to wake him up more now, and I've discovered he will go back to sleep himself if I leave him to it for 10 min or so (he doesn't wake crying, just cooing), so I think this newfound skill has made its way to the beginning of the nap as well. It may all change again next week, so I'm not counting any chickens just yet, but it's nice to see him relaxed enough to do this now.
I honestly thought we'd be rocking to sleep at 1yo but it seems to me he just figures out these new skills and makes his own changes when he's ready. As PP have said though, all babies are so different and some need the reassurance of having you there to help them sleep.
Posted 17 April 2012 - 11:23 AM
Put my 3 week old to bed awake for the first time last night (Nature called lol) and she grizzled for about 30-45 seconds before she settled and went to sleep. By the time I got back upstairs from the bathroom she was almost out like a light. no shushing or patting so I left her.
She was drowsy when I put her down though so not 100% awake.
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