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Are you freaking kidding me?


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#1 Alacritous~Andy

Posted 16 March 2012 - 02:53 PM

I am 7 weeks pregnant.  I have told my parents and ILs, but no one else.  Even my siblings etc don't know.  

I am suffering terrible morning sickness, and confided in my boss, because it is/will have an impact on staffing/rostering etc.  I told her in confidence.  And stressed that I was very early in my pregnancy and that this was not "public knowledge."

Today, I found out that not only has she been speaking freely of my pregnancy to my colleagues, but in front of clients.  My clients!  

I found out when one of my clients floored me by asking about "bubby".

I feel so violated.

#2 Weirdly Sane

Posted 16 March 2012 - 02:58 PM

Hi AA

that is SO not acceptable!
It doesn't augur well for how you'll be treated around mat leave etc, IMO.  I'm not sure if you think this would be overly formal but I think I would be putting in a formal written complaint.  Not harsh words, not long - but just making it very clear that you are not impressed and expect that future discussions will be managed appropriately.

#3 Liv_DrSperm_sh

Posted 16 March 2012 - 03:04 PM

That is COMPLETELY unacceptable!

I'd be putting in some sort of formal something... that, or resorting to extreme violence!

#4 Nasty Bunsen

Posted 16 March 2012 - 03:22 PM

I hope you don't mind me responding, I came in from recent topics.

This happened to me - I told my manager at around 20 weeks (many problems with the way women were treated in the company I worked for so I left it as late as possible to tell anyone) and asked him to keep it confidential until I had a chance to speak to my colleagues personally. It was announced the next day at a state wide company meeting as part of the "good news" section!

I was absolutely furious - particularly because their incompetence actually made me look unprofessional. My direct manager was apologetic but blamed it on the CEO who actually announced it - and no apology was forthcoming from him. I didn't go back to that company after I had the baby.

#5 Spring Chickadee

Posted 16 March 2012 - 03:27 PM

How incredibly insensitive and unprofessional!

It's not just a fun little piece of gossip they can be the one to share first, what if the pregnancy is not successful then you have to spend MONTHS having to retell the heartbreaking news when a client says 'congratulations' or 'how is the baby going' .

such a selfish and thoughtless thing to do. I would be writing an email outlining how unprofessional their behaviour was, that it was not their place the announce the pregnancy and remind them of the reasons why women do not announce a pregnancy yet.

Now I'm feeling very angry for you. Huff!

#6 Alacritous~Andy

Posted 16 March 2012 - 03:29 PM

Unfortunately, there is no avenue for "formal" anything, but I have sent an email to my colleagues explaining the incident today and asking that it not happen again.  

I am on a contract, so no leave entitlements at all, and will not be renewing my contract when it expires in a month.  

I think what p*sses me off most is that managing confidentiaility is a huge part of our work.  So they should all know better.

#7 LouwithTwo

Posted 16 March 2012 - 04:41 PM

Is there no Human Resources group? Would it be a Workplace Relations issue, if you wanted to take it that far?

If all you really wanted to do was vent you've come to the right place. I hope your colleagues have all been supportive of you!!!!!!!!!  

I went through this as well, though I told work at 27 weeks.



I hope it all works out well for you in the end!!!

#8 White-Lily

Posted 16 March 2012 - 04:52 PM

That is awful!

FWIW I know how you feel. After my M/C my boss thought it would be a great idea to tell my WHOLE workplace where I was and what I was doing - I was in hospital having a D&C. No one at work had even known we were pregnant. He thought it was best they know so they wouldnt upset me. That worked out really well, I was fielding inappropriate questions for weeks...  mad.gif  cry1.gif


#9 missj

Posted 16 March 2012 - 04:53 PM

Very unprofessional, you have every right to be angry!

#10 Spring Chickadee

Posted 16 March 2012 - 05:11 PM

QUOTE (White-Lily @ 16/03/2012, 05:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
That is awful!

FWIW I know how you feel. After my M/C my boss thought it would be a great idea to tell my WHOLE workplace where I was and what I was doing - I was in hospital having a D&C. No one at work had even known we were pregnant. He thought it was best they know so they wouldnt upset me. That worked out really well, I was fielding inappropriate questions for weeks...  mad.gif  cry1.gif


Oh my god, that's terrible. I just can't fathom how your boss could be so stupid as to actually think that's a good idea! I'm so sorry you had to deal with that.

#11 Soontobegran

Posted 16 March 2012 - 05:14 PM

OMG I would be furious too.
I am sorry sad.gif

#12 Alacritous~Andy

Posted 16 March 2012 - 05:33 PM

QUOTE (White-Lily @ 16/03/2012, 04:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
That is awful!

FWIW I know how you feel. After my M/C my boss thought it would be a great idea to tell my WHOLE workplace where I was and what I was doing - I was in hospital having a D&C. No one at work had even known we were pregnant. He thought it was best they know so they wouldnt upset me. That worked out really well, I was fielding inappropriate questions for weeks...  mad.gif  cry1.gif


I am so sorry for your experience White-Lily.

#13 White-Lily

Posted 16 March 2012 - 05:39 PM

Thanks Andy and Spring Chickadee. He is a jerk through and through. No people skills at all. I wont even go into what happened when I complained about him... it gets worse if you can believe that.

Hope everything works out for you Andy. They all should know better. Some people don't think before they speak and then just upset everyone around them.

ETA - sorry I didnt realise this was the November DIG!

Edited by White-Lily, 16 March 2012 - 05:54 PM.


#14 franno

Posted 16 March 2012 - 10:22 PM

So inappropriate. I told two senior people at work yesterday and now freaking out slightly.

#15 Ms_Jae

Posted 17 March 2012 - 06:43 AM

Omg I would be totally p*ssed off.. That is so wrong especially from the boss.. What an invasion of privacy.. sad.gif So sorry sweet.

#16 suzy-c

Posted 17 March 2012 - 08:29 AM

That's it. Telling everyone at work it's a tumour. I will have to anyway, so I can make the work test for the paid parental leave. If I tell them, they'll probably reduce my shifts for my own good.

#17 Guest_V's mummy_*

Posted 17 March 2012 - 08:59 AM

Oh noooooo! AA that is unacceptable!  I can't believe they did that!  I would be having words that's for sure!




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