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So, I got a BFP today
* updates* another loss ...

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#1 mrsboof

Posted 26 February 2012 - 02:19 PM

So as you can see in my sig, my path to TTC #2 has not been a very smooth journey.

I got a BFP this morning and I havn't stopped crying. These are not tears of joy. I'm terrified.

I feel like I've just picked myself back up and now am back on the rollarcoaster. I know I desperately want another child, but I just don't know if I have the strength to weather another m/c ......

At least I only have to wait 2 weeks, as that seems to be when I lose them. I am getting twinges as I I type and am already wondering if this is the start of the end already.....

I am going to be a basket case for the next few weeks. Even worse if I lose another.

ETA: I realise that many have you in this section have had losses so much greater and more significant than mine, so I'm sorry if this is trivial compared with what you have been through sad.gif - I have so much admiration for your strength ...

Edited by mrsboof, 12 March 2012 - 08:34 AM.

#2 little lion

Posted 27 February 2012 - 08:30 PM

Hi mrsboof. Yep I can understand what you're saying. I'm trying to stay neutral, not getting too excited or too anxious after getting my BFP on Saturday. I'm not terrified but more in disbelief, probably a bit of a protective mechanism?

#3 sparkle77

Posted 27 February 2012 - 09:17 PM

Please don't apologies for your feelings.  As SIDS and Kids say, " a loss is a loss".  I can't imagine what it must be like to have several miscarriages in a row, not knowing if this little one is going to stay or go either.

I have wondered how I will react if or when I get pregnant again.  I think I will try and connect with this one early.  I didn't with DS because of my earlier m/c, which I regret.

But I can imagine your terror and fear.

I can only hope, really hope, that this one sticks.

#4 mrsboof

Posted 28 February 2012 - 03:50 PM


I am going to the bathroom multiple times every hour. Not becuase I need to, but because I'm checking for blood..... this is aweful. Every cramp or twinge makes me anxious.

I have an appointment booked with the OB on the 13th March. One day at a time until then ....

#5 mrsboof

Posted 12 March 2012 - 08:37 AM

Well this one is gone too now.

I guess I can get out of my little hole of denial and ackowledge that this is actually a pattern, and that there must be something wrong, and not just a series of unfortunate coincidences.

I supposed now I get to undergo the more invasive testing.

I think maybe my DD is more of a miracle then I gave her credit for ......

#6 katbalou

Posted 12 March 2012 - 08:45 AM

I'm so sorry OP.  I think you're right to go for more tests - it does seem to be an ongoing pattern.  I understand to some extent how you feel after having several MCs in a row between DS2 and DS3.  I sincerely hope you have a sticky one soon.

#7 Soontobegran

Posted 12 March 2012 - 08:54 AM

So sorry OP, that is not the update we like to hear.
Take good care.

Edited by soontobegran, 12 March 2012 - 08:55 AM.

#8 Divine 35

Posted 12 March 2012 - 09:03 AM

I'm so sorry OP, i am also dealing with something similar after my 3rd early loss.

I have started some investigations, hopefully we both have successful pregnancies very soon !

#9 clm1982

Posted 20 March 2012 - 03:09 PM

Im so sorry  bbighug.gif

Have you had any tests done to see what might be causing it?

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