Jump to content

Need a man's perspective
someone openly hates your wife


  • Please log in to reply
8 replies to this topic

#1 snappy tom

Posted 21 February 2012 - 08:36 PM

Someone is going through a really tough time right now.  Really tough.  He needs people to blame, I'm one of them.  That's fine, while not reasonable, it's not terribly important that he hates me under the circumstances and I'm actually more worried about his well being than worried that he hates me.

Anyway, he sent my husband a text asking him to forward to me - saying he hopes he gets the chance to repay me (in a bad way) and he wishes nothing but the worst for me, he hates my guts, never wants to see me again etc.

My husband arranged to visit him, told me about the message then asked did I want to read it - of course I said yes.

Anyway, I'm really really hurt my husband couldn't at least have said - 'Hey!  That's my missus your talking about!'   I know I'd never get away with talking badly about his family (I pointed this out, he said that I'm speculating, but he has very sternly told me not to talk badly of his family in the past)  He thinks It's nothing to do with him, why should I be upset with him over something his mate said?

I feel unimportant.  Again.  sad.gif

So, would most men be fine with this, nothing to do with them who wishes their wife 'the worst'  Would you be going for a friendly visit?

I actually think his friend needs him right now, so I'd be fine with him visiting - but I'd at least like b**ching and hating on me to be off limits.  

My husband says he doesn't care about his friends issues, so he didn't not say anything out of fear of pushing him that bit too far.

Please don't quote me, I'd like to delete this if I can



#2 EoinCuinn

Posted 23 February 2012 - 07:34 PM

Not on. I understand this bloke is having a rough time, but jeese, there's a line.



#3 bubblebear

Posted 23 February 2012 - 07:40 PM

I don't think that's how anyone should speak about someone else. By all means your DH should support him if he's going through a rough time, but that should extend as far as disrespecting you.

#4 Red Cabbage

Posted 23 February 2012 - 07:45 PM

It seems he feels you have betrayed him, and he doesn't want to see you again. I don't think he has overstepped to be honest, he didn't say he was going to hurt you or threaten you in any way.

Without having all the information, its hard for me to say if his feelings are warranted or not.

#5 Buff Daddy

Posted 29 February 2012 - 11:34 AM

Nope - no one would get away with talking to my DW like that.   rant.gif

OK, sounds like this person is having a tough time, but that is no excuse.

Buff   biggrin.gif

#6 Lemmings

Posted 05 March 2012 - 08:39 PM

I would definitely expect my DF so say something, Thats really not on and I think he should stand up for you

#7 Jennamoriss

Posted 12 May 2012 - 11:40 PM

get over it,if you don`t try...time will solve this problem

#8 hannahsmummy

Posted 12 May 2012 - 11:57 PM

hi

i have the same problem.. my dh has never once stood up for me with his friends or his family...

i feel exactly the same way that in the great scheme of things i come last...

i have come to the realisation though that they can only bother me if i let them..

hopefully he will get over whatever he has against you and apologise..

tanya

#9 Tobias'smum

Posted 13 May 2012 - 12:18 AM

I get why you r upset it depends say if it was my husbands friend some i wouldnt let it bother me as they can be like that sometimes and have had hard times in the past and got upset my hubby didnt visit as he was helping me with a neck injury. but others i know he would put them in their place including his family acouple times i have not wanted to say something for fear of overstepping so he tells them off for me.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Wondersuit heaven: Bonds & Disney launch exclusive collection

Bonds and Disney fans with babies to buy for will be celebrating this news. Bonds and Disney have just released collaboration Wondersuits.

Perth hospital mistakes cancerous tumour for "behavioural issues"

When Naomi Holly, a mother of three, noticed her eight-month-old daughter Nora, was having difficulty crawling and standing up as normal, she knew there was something wrong.

Piano playing dad soothes son to sleep in moments

There's nothing more frustrating, or distressing to a parent than a sick child who can't  - or won't got to sleep. 

Lucky escape for mum and bub after snake found in couch

Perth mother Laurie Rushton Dyble was sitting on a recliner chair in her home holding her six-month-old son when her husband suddenly told her to get up and leave the room.

When your partner misses the birth

While no one wants their partner to miss their baby’s birth, it can happen. Here’s what to do if you find yourself in that situation.

Motherhood challenge: smug or just a bit of fun?

The #motherhoodchallenge sounds harmless, doesn't it? Some women disagree.

Who's the mum? Family photo goes viral

Last year, it was "The Dress". This year, it is a family photo that is breaking the internet.

5 easy meditation practices for beginners

So who's with me? You know meditating is one of the best things you can possibly do for yourself.

Woman to go on trial for being a bad housewife

An Italian woman could face up to six years in jail after her husband accused her of not doing enough cooking and cleaning at home.

Is the latest advice on women and drinking over the top?

While most expectant mums know to stop drinking when they’re pregnant, experts now warn women should stop drinking earlier than that. Is this necessary?

How household chores can double as a workout

If there's less than a slim chance you'll find time to get out for a jog or to hit the gym today, take heart in knowing that household chores contribute to the calorie equation.

I have no idea what I'm doing - and that's okay

Why don't we talk about the fact that when everything goes right, we may still feel completely lost, and certain that we have failed?

Dad warns of hair tourniquet danger after baby almost loses toe

A shocked father has shared his family's experience in a bid to warn other parents about the dangers of hair becoming entangled around a baby's toe.

Town welcomes first baby in 28 years

Since the 1980s, the Italian town of Ostana had not seen the birth of a single baby.

How to start teaching your kids road safety

It's something that can be taught as early as possible and reinforced as they get older and more mobile - even from toddlerhood.

Just announced: Bugaboo Cameleon³ Classic+ Collection update

Meet the brand new understated chic model from Bugaboo.

The emotional moment a mum hears her late son's heartbeat

It's been two and a half years since Heather Clark's seven-month-old son Lukas passed away.

Nine reasons why you have 'brain fog'

One minute your productivity is skyrocketing and the next you're sitting there trying to focus – just like that you draw blank, your brain, mush.

I had a caesarean and it was beautiful

Guess what? Despite not pushing him out, I cried, and my heart skipped, and I felt the rush of love and pride when I saw him for the first time.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Penny Wong

'The most hurtful argument in the marriage equality debate'

Labor frontbencher Penny Wong is used to to hearing arguments against same-sex marriage. But for Australia's most prominent gay politician, one hurts more than others.

Does exercise have to be fun to work?

Some things in life are inherently served with a big scoop of fun: balloons, bubbles, cupcakes to name but a few, but exercise?

Hair dye gives woman second-degree burns

She wanted a fresh colour for 2016, but instead she got chemical burns.

Kelly Slater saves mum and toddler from 'freak wave'

A Perth family has thanked US surfing "legend" Kelly Slater after the star saved a mother and a young toddler from "a freak wave" in Hawaii.

Apple recalls millions of power adapters

Tech giant instigates massive international recall of power point adapters due to risk of electric shock.

Toddler's adorable alphabet goes viral

It's impossible not to share this little boy's excitement  about the alphabet.

Tot's nighttime waking saves family's life

Like all tired parents, Monique and Kyle Ruppel were looking forward to the day their 15-month-old daughter Celia would start sleeping through the night. 

Australian mum gives birth to quintuplets

An Australian mum who has shared the ups and downs of carrying quintuplets has welcomed her five babies into the world.

Dad of four girls faints at gender reveal for fifth baby

It was all too much excitement for this dad.

The simple way you can help your baby's language development

The way parents respond to their child's babbling can shape how their infants communicate.

Zika virus is 'spreading explosively': WHO

The World Health Organization announced that it will convene an emergency meeting about Zika.

National database recommended for child protection cases

Baby Ebony was repeatedly failed by the agencies tasked with her protection before her horrific death at the hands of her father, South Australia's deputy coroner says.

Hospitals put babies at risk by ignoring policy on elective caesareans

Thirty-eight weeks or 39? Non-medical factors are pushing women to have elective caesareans earlier than official guidelines - and hospitals are playing along.

Police help deliver baby on busy roadside

Two police officers delivered more than a traffic fine by the side of a busy Melbourne road yesterday.

1D's Louis Tomlinson shares first photo of baby

One Direction's Louis Tomlinson has posted the first picture of his baby boy, Freddie, on social media.

 

FREE TICKET

See Hi-5 LIVE in Melbourne!

Get your ticket to The Essential Baby & Toddler Show - register online now!

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.