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Teenage boys and sexual activity
What laws exist and whats normal?


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22 replies to this topic

#1 Mummy Duck

Posted 12 February 2012 - 05:40 PM

I have both a ss and bs and I would like to know what laws may exist regarding sexual activity. I have heard of boys being put on the sex offenders list for being sent images of peer aged girls. So I want to make sure that I know and can educate them on the facts.

What is the age of consent? Does this change if both the participants are under age?

What would you think is normal behaviour for a 13/14yo boyfriend/girlfriend couple (how far do they go)?

Any other thoughts for a mother freaking out.

#2 I'm Batman

Posted 12 February 2012 - 05:50 PM

http://www.aifs.gov.au/nch/pubs/sheets/rs16/rs16.html

This is a fact sheet provided by the AFP about the age of consent.

Just as a practical aside, I would be supplying condoms to my children, in a visible place. I would say, these condoms, here in the bathroom cupboard, take from them, I will chuck them out every 6 months.

I would also be exposing my teens to toddlers/children. Its a valuable lesson in contraceptives.

I would say that 13/14 years are experimenting with sex, in my experience.

#3 StudyMum

Posted 12 February 2012 - 05:50 PM

Funny you should be asking this - I heard on the radio the other day this government initiative to help with such questions.

http://www.theline.gov.au/

ETA - check out the section "Share the Line"

Edited by StudyMum, 12 February 2012 - 05:52 PM.


#4 ShamelesslyPooks

Posted 12 February 2012 - 05:55 PM

Hi! I don't belong in this section but I've worked with lots of teens on healthy and respectful sexual relationships and related issues. I think the suggestion of "the Line" is great, it is a great resource, there are lots more links for parents at the bottom of this page too- have a look around!

http://www.theline.gov.au/parents_and_teachers/faq

#5 Mummy Duck

Posted 12 February 2012 - 06:08 PM

QUOTE (BabyJaguar @ 12/02/2012, 05:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
http://www.aifs.gov.au/nch/pubs/sheets/rs16/rs16.html

This is a fact sheet provided by the AFP about the age of consent.

Just as a practical aside, I would be supplying condoms to my children, in a visible place. I would say, these condoms, here in the bathroom cupboard, take from them, I will chuck them out every 6 months.

I would also be exposing my teens to toddlers/children. Its a valuable lesson in contraceptives.

I would say that 13/14 years are experimenting with sex, in my experience.


We are in Qld and it says

The age of consent for anal sex (referred to as sodomy in legislation) is 18 years, and for all other sexual acts (referred to as carnal knowledge in legislation) is 16 years.

If a person is charged with engaging in sexual activities with a person under the legal age, a legal defence is outlined in section 215(5). It states that:


If the offence is alleged to have been committed in respect of a child of or above the age of 12 years, it is a defence to prove that the accused person believed, on reasonable grounds, that the child was of or above the age of 16 years.

Note: This defence does not apply to acts of sodomy.


So does that mean that a teenager under 16 can be charged with having sex with another teenager under 16? It is clear that they would both know that each other is not 16yo. Some of the other states have a clause for underagers.

#6 ~waiting~for#5~

Posted 12 February 2012 - 06:21 PM

This is for Vic:
http://www.legalaid.vic.gov.au/cle.am_i_old_enough.pdf
Sex is on p32 and Sexting is p35/36.

QUOTE
Child pornography
You could be charged by the police with producing child pornography if:
• you take a nude or semi-nude picture of a person under 18, even
if that person is your friend and they agree (consent) to the picture
being taken
• you take photos or video of a person under 18 involved in sexual activity
or posing in an indecent sexual manner (or who looks like they are).

Mobile phone pictures and the risks of ‘sexting’
‘Sexting’ or sending ‘sext messages’ is where nude or sexual images are
taken on a mobile phone. This is a crime if the photo includes a person
under 18. Sexting has led to police charging young people with child
pornography offences.
The police could also charge you with possessing child pornography if
you go onto the internet and download pornography showing people
under 18. If you put a pornographic photo or video on the internet or
your phone, print a photo, or email or text it to a friend, you could be
charged with publishing or transmitting child pornography. You could
be charged even if you’re the same age or younger than the person in
the picture or video.
People found guilty of sexual offences or child pornography can get
serious penalties and are stopped from working or volunteering with
children.
Think carefully about what can happen if you take or send pictures of you
or your friends on your mobile phone, especially if they’re not fully dressed
and even if they agree.
It may seem like harmless fun, but once you send pictures electronically
they become part of your ‘digital footprint’ and this lasts forever. It could
damage your career prospects or relationships.


#7 Mummy Duck

Posted 13 February 2012 - 06:50 AM

Bump

QUOTE (Mummy Duck @ 12/02/2012, 06:08 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
We are in Qld and it says

The age of consent for anal sex (referred to as sodomy in legislation) is 18 years, and for all other sexual acts (referred to as carnal knowledge in legislation) is 16 years.

If a person is charged with engaging in sexual activities with a person under the legal age, a legal defence is outlined in section 215(5). It states that:


If the offence is alleged to have been committed in respect of a child of or above the age of 12 years, it is a defence to prove that the accused person believed, on reasonable grounds, that the child was of or above the age of 16 years.

Note: This defence does not apply to acts of sodomy.


So does that mean that a teenager under 16 can be charged with having sex with another teenager under 16? It is clear that they would both know that each other is not 16yo. Some of the other states have a clause for underagers.



#8 Pupalumps

Posted 13 February 2012 - 07:10 AM

...

Edited by Pupalumps, 05 March 2012 - 02:30 PM.


#9 Azadel

Posted 13 February 2012 - 07:24 AM

I read (and I can't remember where so sorry no link but it was reputable IMHO, and Australian and current) that 10% of Australian children have had sex by their 14th birthdays. Numbers rise sharply from there.

Afaik the age of consent laws only come into play if the parents of the young person decide to make a police complaint.

Having worked in this area I will also be making condoms discreetly available from a young age.

#10 idle

Posted 13 February 2012 - 07:39 AM

My son is 17 and while he has been sexually active for some time, it is mainly everything bar intercourse for most of his female friends up until recently. From ages 13-16, most of them were happy to "fool around" and experiment but not actually have sex. Now that they are 16/17, more re beginning to look at having sex but definitely not a regular thing, more of a once off or with serious bf/gf.
As far as the legalities go, they are told and have classes specifically about this in my son's highschool, with visits from the Police and drug/sex/pregnancy/sti awareness groups. Especially once they were 15-16.
They were all educated on the legalities and consequences of sexting and age of consent.
I would be surprised if that is not the case in most of not all highschools.


ETA, I bought my son his first pack of condoms when he was 14, to be told "i wont be needing them fo r a while mum" and sure enough they sat there. As of last year, I've been buying him a pack every f/n in the grocery shop and throwing them on his bed original.gif

Edited by idle, 13 February 2012 - 07:41 AM.


#11 It'sStella

Posted 13 February 2012 - 08:04 AM

I think that is a really good idea idle. What age would you all start supplying your daughter with condoms? 14 also? I don't know how I feel about it yet, obviously not wanting to condone teenage sex but definitely wanting to promote SAFE sex above everything. Parenting teens is not an easy business!

And another question - if your daughter was 14 and had sex with her 17 year old boyfriend - would you report it to the police?

I don't need to deal with these questions at the moment but am curious as to what others would do.

Edited by Stella97, 13 February 2012 - 08:05 AM.


#12 platypus

Posted 13 February 2012 - 09:00 AM

QUOTE (Mummy Duck @ 12/02/2012, 06:08 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
So does that mean that a teenager under 16 can be charged with having sex with another teenager under 16? It is clear that they would both know that each other is not 16yo. Some of the other states have a clause for underagers.


Mummy Duck if you go further down the page there is a section on "what if both parties are under the age of consent" and it states:

It is a common and normal part of sexual development for young people to explore and experiment in sexual interactions with their peers (Araji, 2004; Barbaree & Marshall, 2006; Eade, 2003). Appropriate sexual exploration is when there is mutual agreement between same- or similar-aged peers, it is non-coercive and all participants have the control to participate, continue or stop the behaviour. If two young people who are close in age engage in a sexual relationship and there is no evidence of a power imbalance or violence, the sexual interaction is not a legal issue (Barbaree & Marshall, 2006).

#13 Mummy Duck

Posted 13 February 2012 - 11:25 AM

QUOTE (platypus @ 13/02/2012, 09:00 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Mummy Duck if you go further down the page there is a section on "what if both parties are under the age of consent" and it states:

It is a common and normal part of sexual development for young people to explore and experiment in sexual interactions with their peers (Araji, 2004; Barbaree & Marshall, 2006; Eade, 2003). Appropriate sexual exploration is when there is mutual agreement between same- or similar-aged peers, it is non-coercive and all participants have the control to participate, continue or stop the behaviour. If two young people who are close in age engage in a sexual relationship and there is no evidence of a power imbalance or violence, the sexual interaction is not a legal issue (Barbaree & Marshall, 2006).

Im not sure this applys to qld as it says...The state jurisdictions that provide a legal defence when the sexual interaction is between two young people close in age (Western Australia, Tasmania, Victoria and the Australian Capital Territory) Im specifically asking for Qld

#14 GenWhy

Posted 13 February 2012 - 11:33 AM

Oh gosh I am dreading this age. I don't belong here just saw it in hot topics. When I was in school not so long ago most of my friends were fooling around but not intercourse. A rare few were at 16 but most us were out of school when we decided to go further.
Am I out of touch to be thinking that I can discuss this with my children at 13-14 but make it clear that if they feel they are responsible enough to be engaging in adult acts that they will need a part time job to pay for their std screens and condoms/birth control? Instill a little responsibility and initiative in them?

#15 Mummy Duck

Posted 13 February 2012 - 01:14 PM

QUOTE (BabyJaguar @ 12/02/2012, 05:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
http://www.aifs.gov.au/nch/pubs/sheets/rs16/rs16.html

I would also be exposing my teens to toddlers/children. Its a valuable lesson in contraceptives.

We have  a 2yo and Im pregnant and so I think the boys understand how much hardwork they are howevery the girls seem to just see cute. Ecck.

Im not concerned about them having sex yet. Ss has a gf and so knowing what is typical and lawful is my duty.


#16 FeralMinx

Posted 13 February 2012 - 03:38 PM

the point about power balance is an important one.  A girl I know was 14, and the boy was 14, the boy made her feel ashamed of not being willing to engage in 'at least' oral sex.  He pressed her and pressed her on the matter, and made her feel that she was wrong if she didn't, so she eventually caved.  Later she felt terrible, and manipulated and has had ongoing emotional trauma.  And to make matters worse she discovered that he had done the same with the former girlfriends, that he had used as proof that this girl was wrong to not do it.  He may or may not have understood that his behaviour was unacceptable, but he certainly had the capacity to coerce unwanted sexual behaviour and possibly could have been charged with assult as a result.  It is incredibly important to talk about no meaning no.

#17 idle

Posted 13 February 2012 - 05:28 PM

Stella97, my daughter? condoms at 14? Hell no!!! Why? Because she wont be leaving the house until she is 30!
unsure.gif

tongue.gif

Also, I don't know about other states but 2 minors having sex have a 4 year allowance in Tassie so if 17 and having sex with a 14yr old, not illegal, however, I have spoken to my DS about the ethical responsibility and how that kind of interaction affects a girl that young. I would be very disappointed in him if he made that kind of choice.

#18 Guest_Buy Me A Pony !_*

Posted 17 February 2012 - 01:24 PM

QUOTE (Stella97 @ 13/02/2012, 09:04 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
And another question - if your daughter was 14 and had sex with her 17 year old boyfriend - would you report it to the police?


The HillmanMinx experience is familiar to me. I'm quite clear about consent even though, legally it's a very complicated area. To me it's quite a straightforward issue of power balance but I would always report underage sexual activity where it's coming from someone who is over the age of consent. Education is what will help keep people out of trouble in this tricky phase and I'm a stickler for protecting kids. I make it clear to anybody listening that this is an area that demands incredible respect for others.

#19 SarDonik

Posted 17 February 2012 - 01:33 PM

The laws are ambiguous and arbitrarily enforced. A lot of kids out there are probably breaking the law when it comes to sex. My neighbours 14 yo son was charged with child pornography for receiving and storing images of a girl from school on his phone. Charges were later dropped, but if found guilty he would have ended up on a sex offenders register.

#20 dessiesgirl

Posted 24 February 2012 - 11:50 AM

QUOTE (~*Twilight~Zone*~ @ 17/02/2012, 02:11 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A pack a fortnight Idle? How many are in a pack?





#21 MidnightDad

Posted 25 February 2012 - 10:53 AM

QUOTE (SarDonik @ 17/02/2012, 02:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The laws are ambiguous and arbitrarily enforced.

Pretty much. If you draw a line in  the sand written in law it does not allow for a chance of common sense to over-ride  it. Two or three year age difference VS ten or fifteen years age difference, sexually  aware Vs sexually innocent. Romeo (16) and Juliet (13) Vs angry  parents.

#22 LittleSister

Posted 11 April 2012 - 11:14 PM

QUOTE (Stella97 @ 13/02/2012, 07:34 AM)
14302675[/url]']
I think that is a really good idea idle. What age would you all start supplying your daughter with condoms? 14 also? I don't know how I feel about it yet, obviously not wanting to condone teenage sex but definitely wanting to promote SAFE sex above everything. Parenting teens is not an easy business!

And another question - if your daughter was 14 and had sex with her 17 year old boyfriend - would you report it to the police?

I don't need to deal with these questions at the moment but am curious as to what others would do.


Providing protection does not "condone" teenage sex.
As for reporting things to the police... If she is comfortable with it and it is a healthy relationship it's OK. But if she is unhappy/distracted/uneasy I would quiz her.... Etc. depends on the individual circumstance. It doesn't really matter how old he is, all that really matters is how she feels about it. If the sex was 100% consensual, calling the police will only traumatize her and everyone involved.

#23 LittleSister

Posted 11 April 2012 - 11:19 PM

QUOTE (MidnightDad @ 25/02/2012, 10:23 AM)
14344453[/url]']
Pretty much. If you draw a line in  the sand written in law it does not allow for a chance of common sense to over-ride  it. Two or three year age difference VS ten or fifteen years age difference, sexually  aware Vs sexually innocent. Romeo (16) and Juliet (13) Vs angry  parents.


It's actually speculated that Romeo could have been 18 - 20 years old, but no one really knows I guess.




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