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So I'm going to hit my due date and I'm not pregnant

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#1 mrsboof

Posted 29 January 2012 - 08:02 PM

I know many of you have had a harder journey than me.

But seriously after falling pregnant first go and having a dream pregnancy with DD I never thought I would have troubles with TTC #2.

After falling the first month TTC, I had my first early loss, I just though it was a hiccup, just a little speed bump to getting my second child. I never could have believed what else I would have to endure. I thought I wouldn't get upset about the due date coming around because I would be prenant and focusing an that baby. I never ever thought that I would be empty and broken.

stupid AF


#2 caroldiem

Posted 29 January 2012 - 08:06 PM

mrsboof i know how you feel *hugs* I am trying for no 2 as well i also had a loss my due date is May i am praying i am pregnant by then but i probably won't be don't give up, keep going i believe when it is meant to be you will have your baby

#3 Chocolate cake

Posted 29 January 2012 - 08:08 PM

I am so sorry to hear this! I hope you have someone for moral support with you tonight to keep you company and give you a hug.

#4 Spring Chickadee

Posted 29 January 2012 - 08:23 PM

Im sorry your are going through this.
Would be milestones are the worst. I was due last August and I had a constant reminder in the lead up to it with a friend due within days of my EDD.  Each milstone (12 week announcement, gender scan etc) I watched her enjoy as my heart broke feeling that I 'should' be enjoying those milestones also. The baby now has its second tooth coming through and I don't even have a baby on the way.

I think I found the EDD harder then hitting 1 year TTC

My due date for my second pregnancy is around the corner also, so I will probably feel down and have a little cry on the day.
I hope you have a healthy baby soon  hhugs.gif

Edited by Spring Chickadee 2, 29 January 2012 - 08:24 PM.

#5 Fillyjonk

Posted 29 January 2012 - 08:26 PM

Hi girls... Just wanted to say that I was in the same place a couple of years ago. And damn, it sucks! But if this sheds any hope for you, I was actually relieved to hit my EDD even though I was not pregnant. I had been putting so much pressure on myself to conceive again by my due date. But once it rolled around unfulfilled, that was that. It was only then that I felt I was really to get past my m/c and could really start TTC without the extra pressure of a time limit.

I am sorry you are at this point at all, but I hope things get better for you soon. Take care. And good luck!

#6 wallofdodo

Posted 29 January 2012 - 08:32 PM

I hit my due date and WAS pregnant, but I had a feeling it wouldn't last. And I found out in that same week that it was not to be.

I was glad to be pregnant, but it still was really hard. I had 3 friends with babies due, some knew of my loss others didn't. One remembered and it was nice.

Look after yourself, and I hope it helps that there are others who know how you feel.

Edited by wallofdodo, 29 January 2012 - 08:33 PM.

#7 little lion

Posted 29 January 2012 - 08:32 PM

Mrsboof it must be a hard time for you. May was to be my EDD and I know I'm telling myself I will get through it better if I have a new EDD to look forward to. But I think for most of us, until our baby comes along, there will be several times of year we struggle with: birthdays, anniversaries and Christmas. It sucks! Here's a virtual hug for you! bbighug.gif

#8 Lagom

Posted 29 January 2012 - 08:43 PM

QUOTE (icesprite @ 29/01/2012, 09:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi girls... Just wanted to say that I was in the same place a couple of years ago. And damn, it sucks!

And the icing on my pity cake, my friend who was due around the same time had a son on my EDD and used the name that we had chosen for if we had a boy.  It was devastating.  So much so that I hardly see her now.  I can't look at her son and not think about our loss and what our baby would have been like.  

It's such a hard road and I am so sorry that you are on it.  hhugs.gif

#9 mrsboof

Posted 29 January 2012 - 09:03 PM

Thanks ladies,

It's sad to know thats so many of us have had to go through this. Thankyou all for being so lovely and supportive about my little whinge.

I also have a friend who is due 2 days after I would have been. I havn't seen her since she announced the pregnancy. It was seeing the pickys of her nuchal of FB that made me realise I was not OK.

I know I should count my blessings and all, and I know many in a far worse situation. And for most part now I am doing OK, but these little milestones just get me down. I think this one was like a little psychological deadline I had in my head. I was just not expecting it to be so hard this time and was not prepared (if you ever could be)

amabanana - that would have been so hard, and I am worried I will do this same with this friend.

btw Spring Chickadee, I do love that photo in your sig and I'm glad to see it back

Edited by mrsboof, 29 January 2012 - 09:08 PM.

#10 Beth E

Posted 29 January 2012 - 09:10 PM

I'm so sorry you are going through this, and feeling so sad.

Don't feel your issues are any less than anyone else's - yours is massive too, and a hard one to get over.

So many of us grieve our little angels who never got too far along...

Sending you best wishes and comfort at this time.

#11 MarsBarSlice

Posted 29 January 2012 - 09:12 PM

I too have been in this position. It's so hard to understand why no. 1 comes pretty easily and then it goes downhill. I had no explanation for my 2 losses. I wasn't pg for the 1st EDD and I put so much pressure on myself and built it up. When it had passed I felt relief that I had made it. I was pg for my 2nd EDD which was slightly easier. I am still not over my m/c's and probably never will be. All I have noticed is that in time it has gotten easier to cope with regardless of my circumstances.

#12 -HungryWoman-

Posted 29 January 2012 - 09:15 PM

Sorry, wrong section

Edited by -HungryWoman-, 29 January 2012 - 09:35 PM.

#13 Honey Pot

Posted 30 January 2012 - 01:06 AM

sad.gif  I've been where you are and it's terribly hard. It took me a while to get pregnant after my first loss and I was so grateful that I did before my EDD came up. On the day however, i couldn't stop thinking about what could've been, and didn't feel any sense of relief that I was pregnant. Late that afternoon I started bleeding and had another miscarriage. So in a stupid case of irony, I lost the 2nd one, on the due date of my first.

TTC can really suck at times...  I hope that you get a baby in your arms before the year is over.

Edited by thesame, 30 January 2012 - 01:09 AM.

#14 porkchop's mama

Posted 30 January 2012 - 10:21 AM


Sorry you're here and feeling this way.

I can't say much except I can relate.

I miscarried at the time I was due with my first pregnancy and am not going to be pregnant by the due date of my second pregnancy due to a third pregnancy loss.

Thinking of you and hoping for better days ahead for us all.  I mean, how much worse can things be?

PCM xxx

#15 Alyx

Posted 31 January 2012 - 11:52 AM

Mrs Boof

Im sorry you are feeling this way, sending you  bbighug.gif  

I know how you feel my first EDD was on sat and with my second EDD one of my friends is due on the same day and another is due two weeks after and she lives just across the road from me so I know that one will be harder than the first one.

#16 Duck-o-lah

Posted 04 February 2012 - 10:17 PM

I just realised last night if I don't fall pg this cycle I won't be pg on my EDD. I always assumed I would be (I mean how long can ttc take, right? rolleyes.gif ), so it was a bit of a shock sad.gif
Sorry for your losses, OP bbighug.gif

#17 mrsboof

Posted 04 February 2012 - 10:28 PM

I actually came in to do a little update.

I have had my big cry, and now I feel (just slightly) like a weight has been lifted. I think I put so much pressure on myself to be pregnant by now, and now its not realised, that pressure is gone.

I had an appointment with my O&G this week. He is sending me for tests and now going to monitor me by ultrasound as he wants to check if I'm ovulating (I think because my B-hcg took so long to get down).

My big test is tomorrow. A kiddy's birthday party with a whole bunch of pregnant women (including the one due 2 days after I would have been). I am hoping for much strength to keep that smile on my face.....

Edited by mrsboof, 04 February 2012 - 10:39 PM.

#18 Grant Me Wings

Posted 04 February 2012 - 10:34 PM

I'm another in the same situation if I don't fall this month (and I know I wont).

I am trying not to think about it, but still catch myself and can't help but have the feeling that I should be holding my baby now.

Sorry you are going through this.

#19 kmaharaj

Posted 12 March 2012 - 11:42 AM

I lost my DS at 18 weeks in Nov last year and coming up to the due date on 18/4. I am dreading it. Was hoping to be expecting by then but it hasn't happened yet. cry1.gif

Me - 35
DH - 34
TTC #1.

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