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Mem Fox's Husband Guilty
Of Child Abuse

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120 replies to this topic

#101 virtuallotus

Posted 31 August 2011 - 12:49 PM

Once again, money talks and bullsh*t walks...



Edited for spelling.

Edited by virtuallotus, 31 August 2011 - 01:23 PM.

#102 ~Nodnol~

Posted 31 August 2011 - 01:21 PM

QUOTE (virtuallotus @ 31/08/2011, 12:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
One again, money talks and bullsh*t walks...



Doesn't it?  sick.gif

#103 Pobbs

Posted 31 August 2011 - 01:50 PM

QUOTE (FluffyOscar @ 09/07/2011, 07:33 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
If my husband admitted having sex with a child, "consensual" or not, I would not support him.

There are certain things that my partner could do that would certainly mean that I would not support him, including something similarly heinous, as a PP said.

I would never support my partner if they were accused in court of child molestation. Never. There has to be a reasonable amount of evidence to support a charge such as this in the first place for it to get to court.

I don't believe that this 17 year old could have pulled down someone's pants and started performing oral sex on someone before that person could stop them. Wrong.

#104 GWTW

Posted 31 August 2011 - 05:48 PM

I am furious.

Th poor dear "suffered" through media attention...UM YES BECAUSE THE GUY SEXUALLY ABUSE A STUDENT.

And he has done a considerable public service so it is ok that he abused at least one person in that time, because he did a lot more good than bad?!

And people wonder why those who have been abused don't come out and report!

And the fact the guy was found guilty, where he used a defence that HE was in fact the victim of untoward sexual advances speaks volumes of a perverse situation and his inability to show he had any responsibility for his crime.He had no remorse.

This guy deserved Jail time. His survivor deserved it.

I am so furious. I can't imagine how his survivor feels after having gone through the examination about his supposed sexual advances towards his abuser.

Edited by Zombie Shakespeare, 31 August 2011 - 05:50 PM.

#105 atua

Posted 31 August 2011 - 08:07 PM

i just read this online and it makes me feel physically ill - the child turned to him for help and he abused his position of trust.

and to think they have full time care of their grandson turns my stomach even more sad.gif

#106 Melissa4444

Posted 31 August 2011 - 09:17 PM

I'm finding this story pretty upsetting at the moment, almost triggering. I'm so angry that he has received no custodial sentence. So angry that a judge can rule that he commited the crime and choose not to punish him.

It defies belief and sends just the worst message to other victims of molestation. Yet again. Don't fight it. Don't tell. You'll lose and they'll still have all of the power, so what's the point? :-(

#107 Melissa4444

Posted 01 September 2011 - 02:58 PM

Couldn't help myself.  I blogged it. Had to get it out somewhere.  sad.gif

#108 GWTW

Posted 01 September 2011 - 03:52 PM

Great blog post Melissa.

#109 baddmammajamma

Posted 01 September 2011 - 05:35 PM

QUOTE (mummacat @ 24/08/2011, 06:05 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I just got in our pigeon hole at DS kindergarden and advertisement to attend "An evening with Mem Fox".

They want you to pay $5 to hear "the world respected writer".

OMG I can not believe they are advertising in the kindy newsletter for this women on the same day as this article is printed.


I for one would not pay a cent to hear anything she says.

mummacat, I would be inclined to let your school know that Ms. Fox is married to a convicted child molester and therefore, it is inappropriate for them to be promoting such an event.

Melissa,really powerful blog post. I think I will be writing to that judge as well. What a miscarriage of justice.

#110 BetteBoop

Posted 01 September 2011 - 06:03 PM

Melissa, your blog was wrenching. I am so, so tired of this being the reality for millions of women and children.

There is no justice. Men can rape again and again with absolute impunity.

I hope I live long enough to see the sick attitudes that support and condone this behaviour change.

#111 She-Ra

Posted 02 September 2011 - 08:40 PM

I'm also outraged at this decision, I just dont get it. How the hell can they justify that? The way the judge continually referred to his outstanding career should be the very reason that he did some time.

Melissa that was a remarkably powerful blog. Are you sending it to the magistrate? I would, I'd also like to read the case on austlii if its ever published. I just cant get my head around the decision not to send him to prison, people have been sent to jail for far lesser evils than this. It really makes you wonder doesnt it?

#112 baddmammajamma

Posted 02 September 2011 - 08:53 PM

I continue to fume about this decision. What sort of message does this send to victims?

I would like to see a zero tolerance policy when it comes to crimes against children. You commit the crime: you do the time. No exceptions, regardless of who your spouse is.

#113 Winterlong

Posted 03 September 2011 - 07:21 PM

What a vile couple.  What a a kick in the guts for the victim.

#114 red door

Posted 03 September 2011 - 07:27 PM

QUOTE (tenar @ 08/07/2011, 07:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I see nothing in that article to suggest that Mem Fox was painting the teen as the aggressor.  I also see nothing wrong with supporting your husband.  Maybe she believes his version of events - it wouldn't be the first time someone believed their spouse, even in situations that might not be all that believable.

yeh, I must have missed that detail in the article too.

#115 FloralArrangement

Posted 03 September 2011 - 07:27 PM

I have always thought that woman comes from another planet a sad way to find out I was right. Child abuse is dealt with so badly.

#116 red door

Posted 03 September 2011 - 07:45 PM

QUOTE (Jemstar @ 08/07/2011, 09:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I doubt this is as cut and dried as some people would like to think. Unquestionably, Fox did the wrong thing and deserves to be punished as he was an adult and in a position of power in relation to the 17 year old. But I suspect the 17 year old probably was involved in making advances too - after all the judge found that it was 'consensual'. And a 17 year old is hardly the same thing as a 12 year old or even a 15 year old. I wouldn't even classify a 17 year old as a child in any other way than a legal sense.

That said, Fox was defnitely in the wrong and should have rejected the 17 year old's advances and nor should he have pursued him.

And yes, despite what I may think about Mem Fox's comments about parents putting children in daycare I can still feel some compassion for her in this situation. How awful it must be to find out something like this about your husband.

this is how I see it.

I is wrong in that being someones teacher you should have more professional boundaries, but the judge concluded that it was consensual and it is merely that he was 17 that makes it a crime( 1 year later and no one would have heard about this). I suspect when people read these sorts of articles they project their own feelings of being violated onto the story and assume a whole dynamic that may or may not be the truth in this situation- and it sounds like it may not have been.

The reality might be that in this situation the young man may have made the advances...and the teacher should have stopped it then and there, but I am reading some of you comparing this to a small child intimidated into silence by a looming adult when there is no actual suggestion of that dynamic at all. its projection.

#117 BetteBoop

Posted 03 September 2011 - 07:51 PM

Reddoor, I disagree.

There are age limits on everything. We all need to respect them or we face the consequences. And those age limits are there for a reason.

Saying, 'oh it's only a year's difference' is like saying 'oh it was only an extra drink or two before i drove the car'. It's just an excuse for someone's illegal behaviour.

The reason that people are furious is because this boy went to a teacher for help, to disclose abuse he had suffered and wound up being abused again. I think that's a pretty significant factor, that Fox knew the kids was vulnerable and traumatised and all he could see was an easy screw.

#118 red door

Posted 03 September 2011 - 08:00 PM

QUOTE (BetteBoop @ 03/09/2011, 07:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Reddoor, I disagree.

There are age limits on everything. We all need to respect them or we face the consequences. And those age limits are there for a reason.

Saying, 'oh it's only a year's difference' is like saying 'oh it was only an extra drink or two before i drove the car'. It's just an excuse for someone's illegal behaviour.

The reason that people are furious is because this boy went to a teacher for help, to disclose abuse he had suffered and wound up being abused again. I think that's a pretty significant factor, that Fox knew the kids was vulnerable and traumatised and all he could see was an easy screw.

I agree, as I said, I do believe he DID do the wrong thing, but as much as it appeals to the black and white nature of some, there IS a difference in certain situations. There just is. Just like a 19 year old being charged with statutory rape after having consensual sex with his 15 year old girlfriend, and having a conviction as a sexual predator, it is different from the abuse on a young child, or the abuse from non consensual sex. How can you say it is not? it just is.

I don't think he is without guilt at all, but people get blinded by their own experience that the truth gets lost. Peoples judgement is compromised by sensationalising a situation.

#119 BetteBoop

Posted 03 September 2011 - 08:08 PM

Yes, abusing a traumatised teenager is different to abusing a toddler. It's also different to abusing a teenager who wasn't a virgin through consensual sex.

They're all different scenarios but they're still all illegal. As they should be.

Which one is 'better' or 'worse' depends on a lot more factors than just the age of the victim.

#120 Winterlong

Posted 24 September 2011 - 08:30 PM

Peoples judgement is compromised by sensationalising a situation.

Sensationalising?  How?

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