Jump to content

Surviving Suicide: Nut's story


  • Please log in to reply
83 replies to this topic

#1 EBeditor

Posted 07 April 2011 - 02:56 PM

http://www.essentialbaby.com.au/life-style...0407-1d56s.html

leave a message for Nut here.

#2 Guest_Dinah_Harris_*

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:03 PM

Thanks for sharing and for reminding us to connect with family and friends as often as we can.  I'm so sorry for your loss.
But Nut, this wasn't your fault.
RIP Lothar.



EFS.

Edited by Dinah_Harris, 07 April 2011 - 03:11 PM.


#3 PurpleNess

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:04 PM

So sorry for your loss & thank you for being brave enough to share your painful story. RIP Lothar

#4 Bex_star

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:09 PM

A heartfelt and raw account of something so painful and yet so often not spoken of.

Im so sorry Nut that you and your family had to experience this type of loss and Im so sorry for your brother who obviously felt so lost he couldnt see the way out.

xx



#5 Therese

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:09 PM

Thank you for sharing your story with us.  It took a lot of courage.

You have reminded me to cherish every moment with people.  Thinking of you and your family.  Xxx

#6 TinyTeddys

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:12 PM

A member of my immediate family took their life a few years back and other than family, most people close to me don't know they commited suicide. Thank you for sharing your story, I know how hard it can be, RIP Lothar

#7 B.M.C.M.I.E

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:19 PM

Thank you for sharing your story Nut.

I'm sorry for the loss of your brother but I appreciate you sharing, it gives a little comfort to those who've been in the same situation.

I truly hope this helps people see warning signs and to help someone in need.

#8 boymakingmachine

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:24 PM

Nic you wrote your story so well. I am like i was when it happened so deeply sorry that you have to go through this.

#9 andyk

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:24 PM

Thank you for sharing your story.  I am so sorry for the loss of your brother.

#10 Mercurial

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:25 PM

Nut - thank you so much for sharing your story.  I can't imagine how difficult the last 10 months have been for you and your family.  

Thank you also for reminding us why it's so important to love and enjoy our families.

#11 Guest_maybelle_*

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:30 PM

Thankyou for sharing.  I wish you didn't have such a story to tell.

#12 mummy2bailey

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:32 PM

I am so very sorry for the loss of your precious brother, thankyou for sharing your story I can't imagine how hard it was to write

And thankyou for reminding me not to take my family for granted, we too are a very close family and you would never think it could happen to one of our's, your story made me relise it can happen to anyone, anytime

Take care xx

#13 YodaTheWrinkledOne

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:33 PM

that's powerful reading.

#14 ToddlerWrangler

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:35 PM

Oh Nut I am so sorry for the loss of such a kind hearted soul. Thank you so much for sharing your story, i know it would have been hard to write. I think that it is truly beautiful that you all have a tattoo that is a memory and will stay with you always.
It has made me think of my BIL who is currently depressed, i will make an effort to see him more.


Sending you lots of love to you and your family

#15 Accidental

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:42 PM

Thanks for sharing, Nut.

I'm going to take a family photo with DH when he gets home, we don't have one yet and I guess I never considered there may be any urgency, but you really never do know.

#16 cardamom

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:44 PM

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Thank you for sharing your story - it has a real personal resonance for me. My family too are very close, like you said, others joke that we are 'abnormally' close. For the past few months my younger brother has seemed down and withdrawn; whenever I've asked him if everything has okay, he's brushed me off. I've always thought that, because we are so close, if something was really wrong, I would know about it. This has reminded me that that's not true.

#17 =R2=

Posted 07 April 2011 - 03:50 PM

What a touching story Nicole and so sorry for your loss  sad.gif.

My husband (also in IT) was bullied at work some years ago before our first child was born. I'm sure he went into depression and it was scary seeing your loved one replaced by a souless being. We agreed that resigning was the best thing to do. He found more dignity in being unemployed in the short term compared to his whole being ripped apart at work week after week.

I'm so sad for your brother having nobody to turn to and talk to during his darkest days. I hope your family finds some peace and love in remembering him.

#18 B-B-M

Posted 07 April 2011 - 04:00 PM

Thank you for sharing a story that never should have to have been written. I have also lost a sibling to suicide (sister). No words can describe it.

I send strength to you and your family.

#19 Peppanickel

Posted 07 April 2011 - 04:08 PM

I am so sorry for the loss of your brother Nic.  Please just know that nothing you could have done would have changed it.  As someone who has been to those depths regularly, who has had a couple of failed attempts, has been hospitalised a few times for being suicidal there is not anything that anyone could have done any differently or said any differently that would have changed my mind or prevented the attempts that I did make.

#20 Gurt

Posted 07 April 2011 - 04:12 PM

I am in tears. I am just so sorry for the loss of your brother, but thank you for making us aware that we should make every day count (I am one who has no photos of me with the kids either because I hate them - You have inspired me to change that). Thinking of you x.

#21 Two Socks

Posted 07 April 2011 - 04:13 PM

Beautifully written, Nut.

#22 babatjie

Posted 07 April 2011 - 04:29 PM

Thank you for sharing Nut. It's so true what you said about saying 'I love you' and taking photos. So often I say no to a photo because I don't feel my best.

I can see the family resemblance between your son (when you had him in your sig a while ago) and your brother.

#23 Peanut

Posted 07 April 2011 - 04:37 PM

I have never forgotten that photograph of your father mourning his son at the funeral.  Very powerful and very moving.

All the best to you and your family, Nut.



#24 red door

Posted 07 April 2011 - 04:37 PM

wow Nut...your line "drowning in his own mind..." made me cry.

Strength be with you.

#25 *Ev

Posted 07 April 2011 - 04:38 PM

Nicole, thanks for writing it.

For the other readers.... I am Lothar's mother.
My son's decision to take his life devastated us.  
To those who suffer from depression and keep it to themselves....  my message is, TALK TO SOMEONE.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Win a Mountain Buggy Swift

To celebrate Essential Baby reaching half a million Facebook fans, we have a Mountain Buggy Swift to giveaway to a lucky fan.

Shopping with kids: breaking the pester-power cycle

You're out shopping with your little one and they're incessantly whining that they want a treat. It's easy to say no ... the first time, at least.

eBay jacket may hold clue to murdered girl's identity

A jacket similar to the one found with the remains of a brutally murdered little girl in South Australia has been identified on eBay.

New mum forced back to work early due to paid parental leave 'technicality'

Shelley Parker had to keep driving buses until the date her baby was due and will have to rush back to work at the end of this week after being denied paid parental leave on a "technicality".

Pregnant Amanda Palmer poses naked for book drive

It has to be the most original way ever of promoting a children's book donation day.

The conception dilemma facing many parents today

Some parents who conceived through a sperm donor will be wary of telling the child, while others prefer to deal with it early on. But recent research suggests it makes little difference either way.

The wedding photo the bridesmaid would rather forget

We've probably all seen a passed-out bridesmaid at one wedding or another, but it usually happens towards the end of the night.

Pregnant TV meteorologist takes on haters

Pregnant TV meteorologist Katie Fehlinger has hit back at haters who called her a "sausage in casing".

Honest words from first-time mums

I didn't want to say anything negative to my pregnant friend, but I wish I'd been more honest.

Adorable baby experiences rain for the first time, couldn't be happier

Harper had seen rain from the comfort of indoors before, but had never had the pleasure of being outside and experiencing it first hand.

What it's really like to start a family in your fifties

Many people suppose that it must be much more tiring to have a baby in middle age, but all the mothers in the playground look exhausted, whatever their age.

'Biggest hypocrite ever': Josh Duggar admits to Ashley Madison account

An American reality TV star has been busted with a cheating website account, according to US media.

Long recovery ahead for girl hit by car weeks after baby brother's death

A little girl is more alert and starting to talk after being hit by a car a week ago, but still faces a long recovery.

How to react when a toddler lies

Q: My almost-3-year-old is starting to figure out that he can lie when asked if he ripped the book, threw the food, hit his brother, etc. Totally normal, I know. How do we respond?

The circular experience of a Centrelink client

A mum-to-be experiences the frustration of dealing with Centrelink, myGov and everything in between.

Kelly Clarkson announces live on stage: 'I'm pregnant!'

Singer Kelly Clarkson has announced she is pregnant with her second child during a concert in Los Angeles.

Hack

How to search the leaked Ashley Madison data

At least three sites are republishing Ashley Madison's user data on the public-facing internet.

Mum dances her way through labour

There are a fair few ways to distract yourself and beat pains while in labour, but it's probably a rare woman who chooses her dance her way through it.

'Rest in peace, my little lion': premmie baby Jacob passes away

Baby Jacob, whose photo of him born at just 27 weeks was deemed 'too graphic' for a fundraising site, has died.

Mum killed three young sons 'to help her daughter', prosecutor says

Niall Pilkington's death last summer apparently raised little alarm in Bellefontaine, Ohio. Tragic accidents happen, after all.

Shorter women have shorter pregnancies: study

When a group of researchers studied nearly 3500 mothers and their babies, they noticed a curious pattern.

Get your FREE Baby & Toddler Show ticket!

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

The worst 20 minutes of my life

Thirty seconds was all it took to turn a shopping trip into my worst nightmare.

Top baby names for England and Wales in 2014

George has overtaken William in the official rankings of most popular British baby names - and Game of Thrones is still having an impact on parents.

Baseball or baby? Dad's tough choice

What's more important, a baby or a baseball? That's a question this dad seems to struggle with.

Childbirth choices: five star or free?

It's not often you hear the words labour and luxury in the same sentence but for some, a 5-star start to parenthood is exactly what they seek. And with a number of private hospitals now offering packages which include a post-birth stay at a sumptuous first class resort, many mums are choosing to recover in style.

'Where did your boobies go, Mummy?' and other soul-destroying comments from kids

Most women carry a smidge of baby weight after giving birth. If you're lucky enough to have an older child in the house, they can keep you on track with your weight loss goals.

Do you read me, baby?

Is it too soon to be reading to my two-month-old son? If not, what should I read?

Minimising sibling rivalry when you've got a baby

Sibling rivalry is an act of competition, but if your children feel involved and special, this type of jealousy will be minimised.

Will studying on maternity leave take you away from your most important job?

I remember when I was trying to decide if I could combine motherhood and furthering my university education.

Win a Pacapod this Father's Day

To celebrate dads and families, we are giving away a Picos Pack from Pacapod Australia filled with a few extra goodies ENTER NOW

Preschooler hit by car shortly after baby brother's death

A mother has had a frantic race to the hospital after her daughter was hit by a car, just four weeks after her infant son died.

Gay couple and Thai surrogate in custody tug-of-war

A six-month-old baby girl is trapped in the Thai capital in a bitter custody wrangle between her Thai surrogate mother and her biological father.

Couple denied IVF over parenting concerns

A mother of six has been denied access to IVF treatment in order to have another child over concerns about her parenting skills.

The book that promises to put your children to sleep

Exhausted parents from around the world are singing the praises of a "miracle" book which promises to put even the most restless child to sleep in just minutes.

5 things every parent who feels guilty needs to know

Parenthood can make you feel bad, but you're not alone.

Royals criticise 'dangerous' attempts to photograph Prince George

The British royal family criticized paparazzi on Friday for what it called their increasingly dangerous attempts to photograph young Prince George.

'No jab, no play' rule to cover Victorian kindergartens and childcare centres

"Anti-vaxxers" face not being able to send their children to childcare centres or kindergarten if they refuse to have them immunised.

15,000 birthing kits on their way to developing countries

Giving birth in a hospital surrounded by medical experts is tough enough, but some women deliver babies without a clean sheet to lie on.

Photo of premmie 'too graphic', fundraising site says

When their son Jacob was born at just 27 weeks, Christina and Jeff Hinks were thrown into an uncertain world.

The latest Bugaboo collections: cool chevron and runner prams

Bugaboo sure likes to keep things fresh, and with the Australian spring/summer season coming up, there are two new Bugaboo pram releases.

Making room for two in the bed

Mum's room or their own room? Cot or bassinets? Deciding where twins will sleep can be tricky.

 

FREE TICKET

See Hi-5 LIVE in Sydney!

Get your free ticket to The Essential Baby & Toddler Show and save $20 - register online now!

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.