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IVF Multiple Cycles & the Long Haul Buddy Group #2


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#76 Rangeman

Posted 01 July 2010 - 11:45 AM

Welcome Rose.  Have you had your TFR yet?

Spock - glad to see your body is back to normal and good luck for your results when you get home. How was Japan?

Spring - how are you going, feeling OK after your TFR, your BT must be soon since you're already 8-9 days DPO.  Sounds like the FET's do go really fast!

Still - thanks for the info, this time I will be on prednisone and clexane too.  How's your cold going, hope you're holding up OK.  I know what you mean about the MS, in a strange way it wouls make you feel a bit more confident - but everything sounds pretty good for you so far.  I think that us girls here that finally get preg will have very nerve wracking pregnancies analysing every little twinge and until the little thing is born.

Meggie - How did you go today?  

CC - Hope you're having a nice time with your Mum and you've got a nice sticky one in there!!!

Hi to anyone I have missed.......

AFM - Well I went for my BT to start the next cycle today but my progesterone was too high??? I've never had that before, I'm going for another BT tomorrow so hopefully it will be OK if not I don't know what happens, not sure if I keep having BT's until it levels out or I wait till next month.  
Had the open house & no bugger came I even made friands so they would feel nice & homey.......mind you it was raining so we have another this Sat - I HATE having to keep the house so clean arrrghhhh!

Kim.



#77 meggie2

Posted 01 July 2010 - 05:37 PM

Hi everyone

Kim can WE have the friands?  I had that thing with the too-high progesterone once but it dropped enough by the next day.  I hope you don't get delayed.

Hi Spring.  You can't just say "weird doctor" and leave us hanging....how was he weird?  Hope you are going OK and not stressing too much.

Welcome home Spock.  Sounds like the holiday hit the spot.  

Yay Still, you are so far along!  Is it starting to feel real yet?

Sounds like you have an awesome plan Rose - I like you have have the next 2 steps all thought out.  

Hi Carita, BB and everyone.

Still sending the sticky-vibes over the airwaves CC.

So I had my transfer today.  All 3 thawed OK (I think the FS was hoping one wouldn't) but only 2 were expanding and 1 was squished up.  You remember I made them do the ultrasound guided transfer, which they don't normally do?  The poor things, the FN couldn't visualise the uterus properly with the ultrasound thingy so the embryologist had to do it.  She just squashed the probe right down on my tummy (no fun with full bladder).   Plus they had to get a new catheter with a metal tip so they could see it.  Then I went to acu and made them count the needles.  

Blerg I hate the 2WW, even if it is already half over.

M

#78 Rangeman

Posted 02 July 2010 - 01:52 PM

Hey Meggie, I'll make you guys friands any day - I'm doing cinnamon scrolls tomorrow.........you were right about the progesterone! Congtrats on the TFR yesterday, did you explain WHY they needed to count the needles, I still have a giggle when I think of that.

Well girls, I start jabbing tonight YAY!!!

Hope you all have a great week end.

#79 cheshire_cat

Posted 03 July 2010 - 09:42 AM

Hi all, am back in the land of broadband.

meggie, great you've had your transfer- yep 2ww is nasty I know. So you didn't put the squished one back, just the other two? Fingers crossed for you!

Kimbar- yay- your wait is over, it's great to be doing something again rather than waiting. Can't remember which protocol you're doing? Down reg?

Rosabella, welcome, that's great you're getting some answers and will be able to treat the problem. Good luck with the single transfer!

Spock, welcome back to Oz, I'm sure you had a fantastic time. Mmmm Japanese food!

spring, grrr to weird doctors! Hope the  2ww is going by without too much worry for you.

stillinhope-- oh your poor kitty sad.gif very sad. I hope she gets better, my cat is my baby too and I always fret about something happening to her.

carita, bb- any news?

Well ladies, it's a BFN for me, as AF arrived with a vengeance on Thursday. No time to even POAS. Am very resentful that I'll still have to go for BT. I think the hardest thing is just not knowing WHY this is happening, having no concrete, medical reason. I feel betrayed by my own body  sad.gif sad.gif sad.gif   ....

#80 meggie2

Posted 03 July 2010 - 01:22 PM

Oh CC I'm so sorry.  It sux and it's not fair.  

It's so hard to then front up for the blood test.  I have tried to get out of it in the past but they said I couldn't get the Medicare back if I didn't.  I hate having to be all brave for them.  Hope it's not too awful.  

M

Edited by meggie2, 03 July 2010 - 05:19 PM.


#81 jobstar

Posted 03 July 2010 - 03:57 PM

bbighug.gif Cheshire_cat  bbighug.gif

#82 carita

Posted 04 July 2010 - 10:56 AM

CC-I'm so sorry to hear your news. Thinking of you. xoxo

#83 Rangeman

Posted 05 July 2010 - 07:46 AM

What crappy news CC - thinking of you.

I must be lucky, my clinic doesn't make me go for the final BT if I don't want to.

#84 spring08

Posted 05 July 2010 - 08:30 AM

I am so sorry Cat - I was really hoping for a better outcome for you this time. This is so crap.

I am out also - started spotting last night, more today, so expect AF this afternoon or so.

Cat I agree with your words "hardest thing is just not knowing WHY this is happening, having no concrete, medical reason. I feel betrayed by my own body."  I feel like I just keep doing the same thing, and have no idea what to try to get a different outcome. I don't really have any hope that this will ever work now, but don't know when you pull the plug and just stop.

Meggie, good luck


#85 meggie2

Posted 05 July 2010 - 09:43 AM

Oh Spring I'm sorry.  Crap crap crap.  

I know exactly what you mean, I said to my FS that I feel I have to keep going until I get either a baby or a reason, but I don't feel any positive vibe for myself at all.  

I just reached the stopping point I set way back when ($20,000) and have now renegotiated that into "$20,000 on actual IVF procedures, not including DS, acupuncture, vitamins, drugs etc".

M



#86 Rangeman

Posted 05 July 2010 - 10:04 AM

Oh Spring - bugger, bugger, bugger.

This is a long, hard, horrible road we're on.



#87 stillinhope

Posted 05 July 2010 - 12:23 PM

Spring and CC - I am so sorry. I dont know what to say. I know there is nothing to make you feel better...

Are you both in 'Unexplained Infertility'? I did just want to ask if you were given the lining test? I had this done to see if there was a problem with my lining and if thats why implantation was a problem.
I am also in the unlexplained cat. I know that im not in the same place now but i havent forgotten and dont feel that my journey is over at any cost. I know im in the 'easy for you to say' catagory now but i really believe now if it could happen for me then there is still hope for you both even if you dont have it for yourself...
I hope this is all coming out right....

take care girls....

bbighug.gif

#88 cheshire_cat

Posted 05 July 2010 - 01:07 PM

Thankyou ladies for your kind & understanding words.

Spring hhugs.gif - I'm so sorry for you too, yes it's like being stuck in a horrible rut, just doing the same thing over and over with hopes getting fainter every time. Sometimes I even feel it would be 'easier'  if someone would just put me out of my misery & tell me I'll never have a baby, then I could at least try to deal with that and get on with my life in some way (obviously not easy at all, but at least some concrete information)... Now it's like being stuck in an awful Groundhog Day with no ability to plan  for the future....Hope you're feeling as 'ok' as possible.

Thankyou for your thoughts stillinhope- Not sure about the lining test- do you mean a biopsy? I did have a biopsy during my lap & apparently all was fine. FS always says my lining is very good & thick. I do have anovulatory cycles so not technically 'unexplained', but yes my repeated implantation failures are completely unexplained at this stage. Hope you're doing well!


Everyone else- Big hugs to all & thanks again for your support, hope you're all travelling well.

xx
CC

#89 Rosabella

Posted 05 July 2010 - 01:57 PM

Hey guys, just a quick one from me as I'm replying from my iPhone.
I just wanted to say a big that sucks to Spring and CC. I too know the feelings you are discribing which is why DH and I had a 2 year break from AC. Was the best thing for me as I now feel like a can cope with what this cycle will bring. Also taking a break for me meant new test were available and I went from 'unexplained' to them finding I have NK Cells. I don't know if this discovery will lead to a BFP but it feels better to have a reason. I hope that there is something still out there for you to be tested for or a new protocol you can try.
Anyway, sending love and praying you can get some answers soon xoxo

#90 spring08

Posted 05 July 2010 - 05:34 PM

thanks all for your thoughts and for understanding - 2 things made me feel better today - reading your posts and my kickboxing class (physical pain is great at blocking emotional pain for a while).
It means a lot to have people to vent to who actually get it. Even my DP doesn't understand what this does to me - he's just keen to keep trying, and doesn't have the fear of being destroyed by this that I do. I really hate how this has changed me as a person.

Cat, you and I can both have a nice glass of red tonight - take care of yourself too  hhugs.gif

Still, we are unexplained - what is the lining test? I have had a stack of BTs for immunity/NK etc, so not sure if that was among those. I haven't had a lap or anything like that - only a hsg.

Rosabella, it is good news that they may have found an explanation for you - and hopefully a new drug regime can fix your NK issues. At least it means there are more things to try.

Meggie, my prayers are with you for the rest of your 2WW

Kimbar, how did your open house go? This Sat was a nicer day, so hopefully that brought out the buyers.

Spock, how was your holiday?

waves.gif  to BB, Carita and everyone else

AF has arrived full on now - spoke to my clinic and I have about 8-9 days to decide whether I want to do another FET straight away or not. Can't decide at the moment, so will leave that for a few days.

thanks again girls



#91 Spock

Posted 06 July 2010 - 05:57 PM

Hi Chesire cat and Spring, so sorry sad.gif . I don't know what to say except I know how you both are feeling and it suks. Life is definately unfair. I highly recommend getting away if you can, so you can both get back to just enjoying being a couple with your partners. Hope you are each having some good wine and some good quality chocolate. Sending you both big bbighug.gif s.

Spring - kickboxing sounds very therapeutic!

Meggie, how are you going in your 2ww?

Kimbar, how goes the jabbing? Hope your open house went well on the weekend. Sounds stressful having to have your place picture perfect for strangers to look through.

Rose, have you had your transfer? If yes, hope things are going well in your 2ww. That's great a 'real reason' has been found that means better ivf treatment for you (hopefully you know what I mean here). Reduces the guesswork involved.

hi carita and bb, hope all is well with you both.

afm, I think the holiday from IVF and what we've been through this year has helped dh and me as we actually had fun and weren't thinking about IVF or anything baby related for a change. Japan was great because we hardly saw any babies to remind us of what we want so desperately. My bts were to see if there were any reasons for the 2 m/c's I had this year. All the bts came back normal which I know is good but also annoying as that means my m/c's can't be explained. It also means we continue to be 'unexplained infertility'.

Well, seeing dh and I are feeling 'refreshed', we are possibly going to do a natural FET on Monday. I get my bt results tomorrow to see if my levels are right for the transfer. Think I'll wait and see what the bt results are before I think too much about it as it might not happen.

#92 Rosabella

Posted 06 July 2010 - 07:12 PM

Hi Ladies, how is everyone?

Kimbar - Hows the jabbing going? I dread having to go through that again. I was so relieved to finally have some frosties after my last stim cycle but if we start putting 2 in each time we will fast run out. Hope your house opens are going well.

Meggie - All the best for the rest of your 2WW, hope all is going well. When is your BT? I am looking forward to having a short 2WW too  original.gif We have not set a limit on our AC costs but the money was also a factor in our 2 year break. We knew the emotional and financial strain was getting too much at the time. I am to scared of reaching the limit to set one.

Spring - Completely agree with 'physical pain is great at blocking emotional pain for a while', I love doing a good Combat class to get out the anger, frustration and heartache. It is definitely hard to decide where to go next, having a break means a longer time before getting a BFP but jumping straight in again can also do your head in. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Spock - Good to hear you had a great holiday. Its good that your BT came back normal but I also understand the desire to hear that there is something wrong, that can be fixed, so that you can get out of the unexplained category. Good luck with going into a FET.

CC
- When did you have your biopsy? I was told by a nurse when they did mine last month that the test for NK Cells is relatively new (only really popular in the past 18 months???) and not all clinics do it. Also they don't do it unless you have many failed cycles, which is obviously why you are in here. I am told that this is the reason behind my implantation issues as I have only had a Chem pregnancy so far. Anyway I might be telling you something you already know.

waves.gif to everyone else

AFM I had BT's on Saturday and Monday. I was told Monday that it looked like I was Oing and that I need to have another BT tomorrow and they will schedule transfer then. I forgot how impatient I am. I just want to get the transfer done already original.gif I have day 5 or 6 frosties so I guess transfer will be Friday or Saturday. I can't really remember the whole process lol

Take Care everyone




#93 meggie2

Posted 07 July 2010 - 11:00 AM

Hi everyone,

Rose that's great you have your transfer going ahead.  Friday and Saturday are the best days I think.  

And Spock, that would be awesome to come back from hols and straight into an FET.  You'll be all relaxed and mellow and Zen.

CC and Spring - hope you are holding up OK, and have drowned or vented some of the blue meanies.

Hi Carita and BB.   Hi Kim, how are you progressing?

Hi Still.  Love having you around, reminding us it is possible.

As for poor little me, I'm 11 dpo and made a mistake of doing an HPT yesterday (stoopid stoopid) - it was BFN and frankly I can feel less and less IPS as we speak, so I'm pretty confident I'm out this month.   Official test is on Saturday but I'm going to ask to bring it forward to Friday. cry1.gif So that will be 12 beautiful blastocysts which looked textbook according to the scientists, and nothing but BFN and m/c.  

So now this is what is happening: change donor, do an endometrial biopsy, do a scan to have a look at my fibroid and maybe take it out, then another stim cycle (9 months older than the last).   I also want to try some new drugs.  Plus hypnotherapy.  I want someone to trick my brain into thinking i'm superfertile.

BUT I got a huge payrise and a bonus from work, so at least it is all paid for (did that sound bitter?  Cos it is.  I've been reading the bitterness thread and there is something to be said for career focus)

Sorry for my pity-party.  

XX Meggie

#94 cheshire_cat

Posted 07 July 2010 - 11:10 AM

Oh no meggie I'm so sorry sad.gif ... Thinking of you & hoping that there may still be a chance. Congrats on the pay rise & bonus anyway! Take good care of yourself. Spock's suggestion of good quality chocolate is a good idea. I had a lovely coffee from the local Italian bakery this morning which was something of a consolation.
xx
CC



#95 Spock

Posted 07 July 2010 - 01:59 PM

oh meggie, so sorry sad.gif . Maybe there is the tiniest chance your home test was wrong....In any case, congratulations on a good bonus and pay rise from work and hopefully it will be money well spent on a bfp. sending you lots of bbighug.gif s. I echo my earlier post to Spring and cc, time for some good quality chocolate and wine.

#96 Rangeman

Posted 07 July 2010 - 02:10 PM

Meggie - bring on the pity party isn't that what we're all here for!

Rose - how did your BT go will you TFRing Fri/Sat?

Spock - What's your TFR news, looks like you & Rose will be in the 2ww together.  

Spring - Have you made a decision about your next TFR yet, it's hard to decide what to do sometimes.

Still - You're the light at the end of our tunnel, how are you travelling along.

Big hello CC, BB, Carita and anyone else I've missed.

AFM - Jabbing away, had my first scan today and it looks like there are 8 follies all around the same size and the FN said I'll prob have EPU next Wed or Fri.  I'm taking a week off work this time so I'm looking forward to a little R & R.  Open house went OK, at least we got some people in this time but nobody's made an offer - sigh.
DH had a little run in with the clinic this week, he normally takes me for EPU & TFR (I have to go to hospital for TFR too) but he's changed jobs and can't anymore (poor old Mum will be taking me) and so we needed to get some of his "goods' frozen.  Which apparently they can't do on a Sat (the only day DH can) so he rang them to see what could be done and ended up telling them that with the amount of money we've spent with them they should be more flexible blah, blah, blah so anyway he gets to go in on Sat!  I told the FN this morning and even she was surprised.  Has anybody ever used frozen "goods"?

Have a good one ladies.







#97 spring08

Posted 07 July 2010 - 02:59 PM

Jeez girls, what a dud week.

hhugs.gif meggie, I am so sorry that this looks like it hasn't worked for you either. Like spock, I hope there's some chance your hpt was wrong/too early, but by this stage we know our bodies.  Take care of yourself, and feel free to vent away. What is your FS hoping to find with a biopsy?  Well done on the payrise and bonus though!!

Cat, how are you doing? Have you had a chance to think about your next steps or do you need some space first?

Spock, it's fantastic that you had a great break and feel ready to go again with your next FET.

Rose, excellent news that you'll be tfr'g Fri or Sat. How many will you be tfr'g?

Kimbar, great that the follies are coming along. We have used frozen goods with 3 rounds of icsi - the scientists told us it is fine to use, however we never had anything to freeze after those cycles - not sure if it was related or not though.  

hi everyone else - off to grab a coffee!

#98 Spock

Posted 07 July 2010 - 04:36 PM

hi ladies,

rose, looks like you and I will be suffering the 2ww roughly at the same time. How are you feeling about everything?

kimbar, 8 follies sound promising. Glad your clinic came around for your dh. yes, I have to agree with your dh, after all the money being spent a bit of flexibility would be helpful.

cc, spring, meggie, hope you are all getting some tlc.

afm, my bt results are in the clear so I'll be having a single blastie transferred on Monday. I have 3 frozen blasties. AT the moment I'm just hoping they defrost with no issues. I know this may sound silly, but I'm actually terrified of a bfp. Not sure how I would deal with another m/c. The only good thing about this transfer is that it is natural. My fs doesn't think clexane or aspirin will help as I don't seem to have any issues with implantation. I seem to have issues with keeping it after which can't be identified as yet through medical tests. This will also be the first transfer I have using acupuncture. Have any of you lovely ladies any experience with IVF and acupuncture?



#99 stillinhope

Posted 07 July 2010 - 04:43 PM

Oh my goodness....how crap is this journey....feels more like a trip to the moon..

Meggs- im not going to say sorry yet original.gif beccause im still hoping for you that it was just too early for the HPT to detect the hormone. 2 days after my BT i did one just so i could see and it was super feint...it depends on the test..dont give up yet sweet hands.gif Pitty party is our speciality!
I think i had the Endo bobopsy (from my big fat greek wedding!!) - is that where they use a spaghetti like tube to collect a sampl of your lining? if so, mine was to find out if there are any NK cells there, my FS told me there are different NK cells only found in the womb..
YAY to payrise.. ddance.gif

So much happening in here today...

Kimbar - nice work with the follies..hope they get nice and fat and juicy for you..not long now, tho i know it feels like ur jabbing for EVER. Good on Mr kimbar - hes right. Glad you can go ahead as planned, arent mums good?!
I cant believe no one came and then no offer - we are looking for an investment and cant find anything, theres always 100 people at the inspections out bidding us..
Enjoy your week off and relax lots after epu...best excuse for lots of chocolate and dvds!

Rose - hope the TF goes well and those precious little ones know how lucky they are!

Spock - Being refreshed sounds fantastic! I hope this next cycle is smooth sailing..have u had the NK lining test done..did i already ask this..my brain is going squishy already..

Spring - how are you? good idea to not make any decisions for a few days, give yourself time..

CC - hanging in there? hope ur ok...

****PG mentioned****

AFM i had a bit of a scare on tuesday..had a couple spots. although miniscule i dont want ANY spots thankyou. Called my OB and she had 1 appointment yesterday. So i went and had a scan, but DH couldnt come, he was in syd for business. Mum came. During in the scan she found 2 cysts on my ovary but said they were no problem and would go away. She said this was very common with IVF patients (clinic never told me this??!!)
But bub was all good. Growing well and good heart beat. SO thank God for that...i was so relieved and cried a bit when i saw it..little beany.(9 weeks now)
Im still not use to the idea of this happening and find it a bit embarrasing to tell people as i think they wont believe me or something or i feel like im lying..going to take a long while to sink in i think.
I might have to start another BG for post ivf pgs cos i dont feel i fit in the general ones, they're all assuming everything is fine...but im in a very different place..but i'll hang here for now original.gif

My flu is pretty better now but i have a mega sore back, going to osteo tomorrow.

Also update, my kitty is heaps better - they dont know what wrong with her but all her tests came back negative (i know how she feels!)

xoxoxox

#100 meggie2

Posted 07 July 2010 - 04:52 PM

Hi Still

So pleased everything is well with you and the bub.  We love having you (don't leave us) but there is/will be a Due In Group for you in Pregnancy/Parenting After Problems Conceiving. I don't think I would cope in a normal DIG either.

Also, thanks everyone for your support. I also really want a big glass of wine but will wait until my BT.

M

Edited by meggie2, 07 July 2010 - 04:53 PM.



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