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Adult child angry with me over Covid 19

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#1 yummymummycakes

Posted 25 March 2020 - 04:47 PM

Like we dont have enough stress at this time.

We have decided to self isolate as much as possible due to 2 x SN kids one whom is being assessed for being immunocompromised. I have my own health issue. The 2 kids at home are 13 & 15 and I am a single parent.

DD32 facetimed me Monday night at a friends house. About 15 people all drinking and sharing food, no social distancing.
Yesterday she facetimed me from a park with a group of about 10 having a picnic - once again no social distancing.
Today she rings me and said she was going out to pick up a friend who was flying in from Sydney and was then going to come visit.
When I said "I'm sorry but no we are self isolating and you haven't been" she cracked it with me.

Apparently I am the worst mother in the world. I am taking this to seriously. I told her that this was really no different to the Aids epidemic. You don't know who the people you are associating with, have been associating with.

I am so disappointed in her reaction to this. Why can't the younger generation understand this? Since when did they get so selfish? And to make it worse - she is a youth worker! Willing to place vulnerable people at risk.

Probably doesn't help that we have a Uncle in hospital dying from this very virus at present. He came into contact with someone who was in contact from someone who came from overseas.

Have I over reacted to this?

#2 Zippypeaks

Posted 25 March 2020 - 04:53 PM

Not overreacting at all! I found this to be a very user friendly explanation of the epidemiology behind what's going on.

#3 spr_maiden

Posted 25 March 2020 - 04:53 PM

You don't need to ask,  you know you haven't. Your DD though, sheesh. I'm sorry she's placing extra unnecessary stress on you right now. Very unfair.

#4 Hypnic Jerk

Posted 25 March 2020 - 04:54 PM

God no!  You have not over reacted at all!!!

When I read "adult child" I was expecting a 20yo (apologies to offence caused to 20yos) she 32 freaking years old!!!

You have absolutely done the right thing.  Stick to it.

#5 caitiri

Posted 25 March 2020 - 04:55 PM

No you haven’t,  people need to get it but some people won’t until it’s too late

#6 Mrs Twit

Posted 25 March 2020 - 04:56 PM

Absolutely not. I wouldn't let her come to my house either.

Your DD has no idea and is being very selfish and foolish.

You are doing the right thing for your family.

#7 Mozzie1

Posted 25 March 2020 - 05:04 PM


However, most of my friends (in our 30s) are taking this very seriously and some of our parents (boomers) think it’s an over reaction and we shouldn’t be shutting the economy down just because of a virus. So I’d be careful labelling an entire generation with a broad stroke. Some people are taking it seriously and some aren’t.

#8 magic_marker

Posted 25 March 2020 - 05:05 PM

Planning on travelling from the Epicentre after not taking steps to protect herself or others.
I would call the appropriate authorities on her and have her given a stern talking to.

And l would like to add that a lot of cases in Victoria are in the 25-29 year age group.

STAY THE **** HOME!!!!!!!!!

Edited by magic_marker, 25 March 2020 - 05:05 PM.

#9 Silverstreak

Posted 25 March 2020 - 05:07 PM

No way are you overreacting. You are being very sensible, unlike her.

#10 purplekitty

Posted 25 March 2020 - 05:09 PM

You are being sensible and maybe you will get through to her and save a few lives.

Edited by purplekitty, 25 March 2020 - 08:13 PM.

#11 NikiOne

Posted 25 March 2020 - 05:15 PM

Opposite here. I just had a fight with my mother 76 who is very high risk because she is taking stupid risks.

#12 PrincessPeach

Posted 25 March 2020 - 05:35 PM

View PostNikiOne, on 25 March 2020 - 05:15 PM, said:

Opposite here. I just had a fight with my mother 76 who is very high risk because she is taking stupid risks.

same for myself, plus several of my friends & we are mid 30's.

#13 Not Escapin Xmas

Posted 25 March 2020 - 05:40 PM

Your daughter and my dad would get along just great. Omg. Get with the program people!!!!

#14 born.a.girl

Posted 25 March 2020 - 06:07 PM

Yeah, I agree about the age groups.  I've struck it in all of them.  I think it's just people.

I also assumed you were talking about 20 year olds, too, and was grateful the ones here are 28, and taking it seriously.

I'm sorry you're having to go through this - the vast majority of us don't even know someone who knows someone with it at this point (about to change, I know), but you'd think given she has a relative with it that would focus her attention.

Given that age group are making up most of the cases at the moment, it's probably true that enough of them are still mixing all to happily thinking it's not serious enough yet.  Most cases mid - late twenties.


The two 28 year olds here have been read the riot act - repeatedly, and we're putting a roof over their head and food on their plates as they're both now out of work, so I guess compliance is an easier path for them.

#15 chicken_bits

Posted 25 March 2020 - 06:26 PM

View PostMozzie1, on 25 March 2020 - 05:04 PM, said:


However, most of my friends (in our 30s) are taking this very seriously and some of our parents (boomers) think it’s an over reaction and we shouldn’t be shutting the economy down just because of a virus. So I’d be careful labelling an entire generation with a broad stroke. Some people are taking it seriously and some aren’t.

Absolutely this. I'm in my early 30s and all I'm hearing is my friends complaining about their boomer parents not taking this seriously.

#16 Silly Old Elf

Posted 25 March 2020 - 06:36 PM

You are not over reacting, your daughter is being foolish and selfish.
Age has nothing to do with it though as I’ve seen both sides across all generations.
I had a man around 50 purposefully run across a road and stop in front of me on my run yesterday. He smirked. I dodged and called him out for what he is.
I’m sorry this is your daughter though, that would make it all much harder x

#17 SFmummyto3

Posted 25 March 2020 - 06:37 PM

Yep, my mum's 75 and said nobody is stopping me from living my life. She's a high risk category and I've had an argument with her also. I'm worried for her health and for others health. She's still catching up with friends and going out. She's angry with me for not letting her come and visit us.

#18 annodam

Posted 25 March 2020 - 06:41 PM

View PostNikiOne, on 25 March 2020 - 05:15 PM, said:

Opposite here. I just had a fight with my mother 76 who is very high risk because she is taking stupid risks.

My mum has given up.
She's not listening to the news, she's not self-isolating, not using the hand sanitiser or the masks we gave her & she's not getting the Flu Vax this year, even though it is currently available to the over 65s.

So I am mentally psyching myself up for her death sometime in 2020.


Edited by annodam, 25 March 2020 - 06:45 PM.

#19 Mollyksy

Posted 25 March 2020 - 06:44 PM

That graph going around of 8 of 10 people doing the right thing v just one less at 7 out of 10 doing the right think freaked me out. But still I don't think would have an effect on those people who cannot get how serious this is.

#20 blimkybill

Posted 25 March 2020 - 07:04 PM

You are not over reacting. Your daughter is in denial and you can only hope that her understanding will grow and she will change her ways. In the meantime of course she cannot come to visit you.

I don't think young people are selfish. My beautiful 20 somethings are doing all the right things. My youngest (21) had an argument with her partners parents , who are not taking it seriously and who wanted to take her to dinner at the pub the other night. She stood up to them and refused to go. 2 of my girls work in professions where they have contact with children and every day they have to agonise over doing their job and risking spreading the virus, or becoming unemployed. It's really hard for them.

#21 Chelli

Posted 25 March 2020 - 07:30 PM

You are definitely not over-reacting. I hope your DD listens to the advice as she is putting herself and others at risk. Good on you for standing your ground as I can't imagine that would have felt good after her reaction. You did the right thing though.

#22 born.a.girl

Posted 25 March 2020 - 07:49 PM

View Postchicken_bits, on 25 March 2020 - 06:26 PM, said:

Absolutely this. I'm in my early 30s and all I'm hearing is my friends complaining about their boomer parents not taking this seriously.

And yet the figures show it's the younger people in hospital with it.

Imagine if EB's profile was mostly 50 - 70 year olds.  How many of them would be like the OP?

We (68 & 70) are taking it more seriously than the 28 year olds that we live with, but I am very unusual in terms of EB profile.

Clearly, from the hospitalisations, fewer younger people are taking it more seriously than their parents.

Of course with an EB profile being heavily weighted to 30 - 50 year olds, of course the majority are going to find it the other way around.

My husband was filling the car with petrol tonight - for the duration before we almost totally self isolate tomorrow.  Ab bloke who'd be no older than 30 came out, leant over him to retrive a sign near the petrol pump, no more than a foot away from him.  Husband couldn't move without falling over the hose, and it all happened so quickly he had no chance to respond.

I'm tempted to report it, but don't want to get anyone in to trouble who's actually trying to work to keep the system going at the moment.

#23 MadMarchMasterchef

Posted 25 March 2020 - 08:04 PM

Social Isolation is an act of LOVE.

I heard that on the radio and I think its brilliant.

#24 Julie3Girls

Posted 25 March 2020 - 08:07 PM

Not over reacting from a individual point of view.

Tarring all of the “younger generation” with the same brush ... completely unreasonable.

There are people refusing to take this seriously in ALL age brackets. Ignorance? Self entitlement? Denial? Some strange sense on invincibility?
It’s not a competition of which is the worst age group.
It’s simply individuals, who regardless of age, are not taking it seriously, and are the ones who are spreading it.

#25 raspberry sherbert

Posted 25 March 2020 - 08:14 PM

One of the coronavirus patients in icu in Victoria is in their 30's.

You are not in the wrong

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