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Is EB representative when it comes to fertility/pregnancy challenges?

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19 replies to this topic

#1 Pink opal

Posted 05 January 2020 - 12:58 PM

Just curious. There seem to be a lot of people on EB with extensive experience in relation to fertility issues, difficultly conceiving and maintaining pregnancies etc. Do you think the extent of these issues on EB is representative of the broader community, and it’s just a forum in which people speak more freely about them and that’s why it seems more common? Or is it that people experiencing  such challenges may seek out forums such as this for support, and so prevalence is higher amongst this community?

#2 ~LemonMyrtle~

Posted 05 January 2020 - 01:11 PM

One of the main reasons i first found this forum was to get info on fertility issues, as i was having my own issues.  Im sure im not the only one.  So no, i dont think its representative.  Id say it has a disproportionate amount of people who have had issues.

I also think it has a big population of people with kids with special needs, for the same reason, people come here to get information and to find others having the same issues as themselves.

#3 Kallie88

Posted 05 January 2020 - 01:12 PM

Well I'm not sure, but i can say that I found eb whilst struggling ttc so personally the last is true for me

#4 Moo point

Posted 05 January 2020 - 01:39 PM

Population stats say approx 10% of people of childbearing age experiencing fertility problems (9% of men, 11% of women). And about 4% of babies born in Australia every year are via assisted conception. So not indicative of a population prevalence, definitely an opt-in/selection bias. I came here when TTC just to have a place to share the journey and learn more about pregnancy and birth, and wound up in the AC forums when we needed to do IVF.

#5 Hands Up

Posted 05 January 2020 - 01:43 PM

I came on here when I was struggling with ttc:-)

#6 No Drama Please

Posted 05 January 2020 - 02:15 PM

Same, I found it after searching up “problems with fertility” on google and ended up on EB. There were other websites but just seemed to have tonnes and tonnes of info in here at the time.

#7 WaitForMe

Posted 05 January 2020 - 02:27 PM

I think people are more vocal about it here too, partly due to anonymity. I am. Hardly anyone IRL knows of my experiences. I think only DH knows of every single one of them.

#8 TheGreenSheep

Posted 05 January 2020 - 03:15 PM

I think it’s like minded people sharing and supporting. Which is why there is such a breadth and depth to the topics and subtopics. Sometimes we come for one thing and find others. And stay and leave and find interests or belonging in other areas.
I came when I was having my second baby, my fertility struggles and losses were in the past, but I have shared some of it as others do. But then I natter away in tv, cooking and other bits and pieces.

#9 MooGuru

Posted 05 January 2020 - 04:48 PM

View PostWaitForMe, on 05 January 2020 - 02:27 PM, said:

I think people are more vocal about it here too, partly due to anonymity. I am. Hardly anyone IRL knows of my experiences. I think only DH knows of every single one of them.

Yeah I'm not sure I've ever spoken about it IRL

#10 ckmelb

Posted 05 January 2020 - 04:58 PM

I also came to EB when I was starting IVF

But I would also say more people IRL struggle to conceive than we realise. Since I am a single mother by choice everyone knows I did IVF so more people share their fertility journeys with me now so I am well aware of more people with infertility struggles

#11 Not Escapin Xmas

Posted 05 January 2020 - 05:06 PM

I think it’s probably higher that the 11/9% quoted by an earlier poster. There are lots of people who don’t seek treatment and just play the hand dealt to them. I know LOTS of people in real life who used IVF.

#12 Mooples

Posted 05 January 2020 - 05:49 PM

I talked about my m/c and d&c here but not irl. I didn’t really want my friends and colleagues knowing but I know I could get the support and answers I needed here. Also, I could cry while I typed and no one knew where as I’d be a mess if I was talking out loud about it at the time.

#13 Lallalla

Posted 05 January 2020 - 07:14 PM

I didn’t find this forum until I was already pregnant, for the second time, and baby name hunting. If I had had more trouble i suspect I would have found it sooner.

As it is, we didn’t have a completely smooth ride in either pregnancy and I am much more open on here than I generally am about things like the threatened miscarriage, HELLP syndrome etc

#14 rosie28

Posted 05 January 2020 - 07:26 PM

Maybe it’s over representation, maybe people are more open. Almost everyone i know who has had kids in the last 10 years has had trouble either getting pregnant, staying pregnant or had a complicated birth or trouble feeding. I can think of one person who got pregnant easily, had a simple pregnancy, straightforward vaginal births and breastfed without issues. Out of my closest girlfriends, 3 of the 4 of us have needed or will need IVF. So in my world EB seems pretty reasonable!

#15 Moo point

Posted 05 January 2020 - 07:35 PM


Edited by Moo point, 05 January 2020 - 07:44 PM.

#16 gemgirl

Posted 05 January 2020 - 09:48 PM

I came on here when I was TTCing and it was taking some time (we eventually did IVF, but were on here pre-IVF)... so like others above, I suspect a higher proportion of us are out there seeking information/ people to talk to, etc. And we're informed more generally, even if you don't have fertility issues.

My sister got pregnant without really knowing much about ovulation at all - her and her husband just had sex every day til she was pregnant. But she'd NEVER be in a forum talking about stuff and seeking information, I suspect, unless she had issues. As it was, she got pregnant first cycle each time. I remember telling her about ovulation days, and she said she hadn't bothered even working it out. That astounded me. I thought everyone would roughly know when fertile/not simply because everyone I know - online, in my other communities- is like that.

Edited by gemgirl, 05 January 2020 - 09:50 PM.

#17 Froyohoho

Posted 05 January 2020 - 09:52 PM

I call it the Fertility Paradox- the more fertile someone is the less they need to understand the processes.

#18 Grassyrat

Posted 06 January 2020 - 11:28 AM

I think it is a fairly accurate reflection, at least compared to my circle of friends. Over half have had miscarriages (one multiple), one a 4 year IVF journey and I had a ruptured ectopic pregnancy. Out of about 10 friends, only 2 get pregnant easily.

Maybe we are a vocal bunch as a lot of us work in the medical industry and it's quite matter of fact for us. But I find sharing what's going on with good friends helped me greatly through my darkest time and if I hadn't spoken about it I wouldn't have been recommended cycle monitoring and clomid and it would have taken much longer to conceive my daughter.

#19 Wango

Posted 06 January 2020 - 09:13 PM

I catch up with 6 friends who I started graduate roles with nearly 20 years ago - we are now in our early 40s and half of us conceived with IVF and one had multiple miscarriages so 2/3 had fertility/pregnancy issues.    I just don’t think it’s talked about much.  

I work in a male dominated industry and now that I am in a leadership position I talk openly about my IVF with young grads if they ask about kids because the perception is still that “there’s always IVF” if they leave kids until later and find that it’s not straight forward.

#20 Nut

Posted 07 January 2020 - 09:11 PM

EB is a concentrated environment of people experiencing similar things. A lot of people come here specifically for support because we all share things in common.

I joined when I was pregnant, then miscarried and lived in the TTC, Miscarriage, recurrent miscarriage, charting etc. forums for years until I finally had a baby and moved on again. After I had my kids I was not as vocal on the forums anymore, as a participant.

A lot of people come here because they are experiencing fertility issues and want a place to get support that is more anonymous. I think this is one of the main reasons people find themselves here. So no, I don't believe it is representative of the broader community. If I look at the people I know in real life, probably 10-15% of them have had fertility issues (quite a few I met on here). More of them have Autistic children (as do I, thus having more friends with in the same circumstances).

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