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Would you go present free?

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#1 AprilEthereal

Posted 07 November 2019 - 08:28 PM

What do you think?  https://www.independ...GRpl3lUr4sIkFlw

#2 tweedle-dee

Posted 07 November 2019 - 08:34 PM

I can absolutely see the benefits of this. We are not in that scenario (yet), but each year feel like within our family we are more restrained on quantity and  value of gifts we exchange.

#3 Hypnic Jerk

Posted 07 November 2019 - 08:44 PM

Ive bought DD a second hand box set of the Chronicles of Narnia, DS I’m trying to source a second hand maze and my family will be getting jars of home made curry paste.  

kids also get a family seasons pass to a local theme park which is a big hit of $$

#4 Freddie'sMum

Posted 07 November 2019 - 08:55 PM

Yes absolutely.  As the kids are getting older, they understand quality over quantity and I would rather buy 2 or 3 presents that they really love than dozens of presents of tat.

Plus I just want to spend time together as a family e.g. going to the movies or mini golf etc, than buy more stuff which just ends up as clutter.

#5 Contrebasse

Posted 07 November 2019 - 08:59 PM

Adults in my extended family have stopped giving each other presents. It’s a big relief!

#6 **Xena**

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:03 PM

I've never really felt a need or felt overwhelmed enough to go completely present free for the kids and we don't do presents for adults in either of our families. My kids usually get one special present from us and then clothes, books, a couple of smaller toys (for the littlies not so much the big kids as their special present is usually more expensive) and lollies from Santa.
My parents, my brother and my sister give the kids all a gift and one of our close friends gives us and the kids a gift each and that's it really. Everyone asks us first and buys them something quality or sometimes gives them money for something they are saving for.

We don't really buy them toys etc during the year- it's only really their birthday and Christmas.

Edited by **Xena**, 07 November 2019 - 09:04 PM.

#7 got my tinsel on

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:04 PM

In my family, there is only DH, DD and me for Christmas each year.

We buy for each other things we need or want because it would make life easier, but wouldn't necessarily buy for ourselves because it is not an imperative.

eg.  We could do with an armchair for our lounge because when we have visitors, there is not enough seating without bringing in a kitchen chair (which is not particularly comfortable for relaxing on).  My 60th birthday is coming up and I have finally found an 'armchair-ish' chair, it's wicker and fits the bill perfectly - not too big so will fit perfectly in the room, sufficiently deep in the bum to back of knee measurement that is important to me, is really great value at the price and can be taken outside to relax on if necessary. And it's sooooo comfortable.

My birthday is coming up and I have dropped the hint.  Might have to remind DH this weekend.

DD is at uni, so we've been buying stuff for her career/uni requirements.

#8 blueskies12

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:09 PM

Not present-free, but scaled down. We are doing calendars and kid-decorated tea towels, plus honey for the grandparents. Friends and teachers are getting crocheted wares and preserves.  I do buy some of my kids toys second hand. They don't mind at 2 and 4. Maybe not possible in a  little while.

#9 CallMeFeral

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:12 PM

View PostContrebasse, on 07 November 2019 - 08:59 PM, said:

Adults in my extended family have stopped giving each other presents. It’s a big relief!

Same here. It's wonderful.

I'm wondering how to downsize for the kids though. The older ones play with toys less, but I feel like they are used to multiple gifts so I'm stuck. The younger one plays with toys still but has so many hand me downs. It's time to cut down but I don't know how without disappointing them.

#10 seayork2002

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:15 PM

If I wanted to yes but we don't buy enough to feel the need.

I just buy presents because I want too

#11 tothebeach

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:20 PM

We are at this point now in our immediate family.  Both my children (11 and 14) have realised that things just clutter up the house and they don’t need them.  I hate the fact that perfectly good things get thrown away or put in charity bins because they get things that they don’t want or don’t use.   Both of them prefer money to use for experiences.  I have never wanted presents so now the pressure is off to buy them.  My parents love presents though so they continue to give them.

#12 Sharalanda

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:22 PM

Not present free but certainly a reduction in giving “stuff”. The kids will definitely get some toys but we are scaling back due to the sheer amount of stuff they already have. We will be giving movie vouchers, passes to the water slide park, mini golf vouchers etc because they couldn’t tell you what they got last Christmas but they certainly remember all the fun things we did. We’ll be giving my parents and in-laws vouchers for their favorite restaurants. Bottles of bubbly always seem to be well received as well.

#13 BadCat

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:34 PM

For a long time now, the only people I buy for have been my kids, my parents, and myself.

We buy very little in the way of "stuff" through the year, so a once a year treat is no big deal.

Never been a fan of buying presents for the sake of it though.  Only ever did teacher gifts for really special teachers, so only two or three over the course of all the school years.

Gave up buying for my sibs decades ago.

But present free?  Nope.

Christmas to me is two things:

1. The joy of giving my kids something they really want
2. Christmas songs

Take away anything else and I don't care, but leave me the gifts and the music.

#14 Hands Up

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:35 PM

We’ve reduced and it’s great. Secret Santa for the adults. Then we buy our kids 3-4 presents each and I’ve convinced my parents and my sister to buy one thing each. Sooooo much better they get a few decent presents than a bunch of crap. This year I’ve invested in second hand LEGO and I’m looking into cameras. They’ll also get a transformer each because they’re obsessed and probably a book each.

#15 seayork2002

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:39 PM

We don't by experience gifts for DS because we just do things on weekends/holidays when we want to do them so if we want to go to the cinema,zoo, theme park,do pottery, race cars, go abseiling we just do it. (Examples only)

#16 Ollie83

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:44 PM

Both sides of our family do a draw out of a hat and buy one quality present for a person or couple.

This year is our daughters 2nd Christmas and she’ll be getting 2 wooden items and some clothes.

We are big on experience gifts and weekends away rather then house clutter ;)

#17 BadCat

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:50 PM

The word clutter bandied about in threads like this always bothers me.

Clutter is stuff you don't love but takes up space nonetheless.  By all means don't buy clutter, but don't imagine that thing you or your kid loves is clutter simply because it requires a space in your home.

#18 Lou-bags

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:51 PM

No. We don’t tend to go over the top. I like the process of choosing gifts for those I care about, and my kids love it too. It’s nice for them to do something for others, that brings them joy. They (obviously) love getting gifts too.

#19 seayork2002

Posted 07 November 2019 - 09:56 PM

View PostBadCat, on 07 November 2019 - 09:50 PM, said:

The word clutter bandied about in threads like this always bothers me.

Clutter is stuff you don't love but takes up space nonetheless.  By all means don't buy clutter, but don't imagine that thing you or your kid loves is clutter simply because it requires a space in your home.

This! Our sons Lego is taking over the place and driving us bonkers BUT it his thing so we let it go

He is very into it same with our things we love

#20 Lunagirl

Posted 07 November 2019 - 10:13 PM

We went present-free for adults in my extended family last year. It was great, though I’d happily go back to Secret Santa like we did the year before. It’s so much less stress in the lead-up.

#21 got my tinsel on

Posted 07 November 2019 - 10:50 PM

View PostBadCat, on 07 November 2019 - 09:50 PM, said:

The word clutter bandied about in threads like this always bothers me.

Clutter is stuff you don't love but takes up space nonetheless.  By all means don't buy clutter, but don't imagine that thing you or your kid loves is clutter simply because it requires a space in your home.

So much this.

I have only 1 thing from my childhood and 2 items from my teenager-hood.  Everything else was 'disappeared' by my mother - I understand why - with so many children it would easily have gotten out of control.  But there was no consultation and the things I loved most are gone.

We have always given DD the choice of what to keep and what to donate/throw out.  None of her choices would have been my choice, but it wasn't my heart making the decisions.

#22 ainira

Posted 08 November 2019 - 06:06 AM

I don't think I'll ever go present free for the kids, but most of their presents aren't toys anyway and stuff they need? (Clothes, suitcases, books). Even for DD1's recent seventh birthday, the only actual toys from us were two Schleich blind bags (the rest were books and a Nat Geo Kids subscription), but I figured she would get some toys from her friends at her party.

#23 Bearynice

Posted 08 November 2019 - 06:31 AM

I couldn’t go present free as I love to give gifts ( and I feel I’m honest I love to receive a couple of things too)

We have definitely tried to improve on our decisions on what we buy. As the kids get older I find it easier to get something that they will use throughout the year.

But yes our house is filled with lego. That’s something my kids love, so I run with that.

Birthday and Xmas both kids get some lego. They love it!

We buy for our household, my parents, school teachers. I don’t buy for coworkers but take in nice food for end of year!

#24 onetrick

Posted 08 November 2019 - 06:41 AM

I love giving presents, but DS was overwhelmed at Christmas last year (he was 8mo), and we have asked family to scale back the amount of stuff and we have done the same. No clutter, though- stocking stuffers are useful things he needs, and will be the same for DH and I.
We try to ask for experience gifts, but having time to do the said experience is also difficult sometimes.
We gave my mum and MIL zoo memberships last year and will probably renew those if they want, so we will try to think of other similar gifts for each other.

#25 Caribou

Posted 08 November 2019 - 06:41 AM

We’ve started the transition to swap ‘gifts’ for experiences. The kids having being used to gifts wouldn’t appreciate the sudden swap. So we have 2 small gifts to unwrapAnd keep them busy for that day (LEGO Set for one, bike for the other) and then 2 cards with Experiences in them. DD is going to SeaWorld to swim with dolphins. Her LEGO set is underwater themed too.

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