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What’s something hilarious your kids have said?


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#101 sahmie

Posted 20 July 2019 - 11:41 PM

My grandmother had just died, and to avoid any awkward questions at the funeral (where they were likely to happen) we were having a chat about the death of loved ones.
My mum asked my girls if they knew how great nan had died, and DD2 (aged 6) replies “cause she was old and yucky”.

We were in the car discussing car seats, safety, and why new baby sister was rear facing, when DD 2 (aged 7) comes out with “yeah we don’t want DD3 to die, cause when she’s older she can help us empty the dishwasher”.

A cousin of mine also passed away this year in tragic circumstances, so I was very emotional. DD2 tells me “I know he was your favourite cousin mummy, but it’s ok because you have lots more”.

We were heading to Thailand earlier this year, and as my girls have ASD and very bluntly say whatever comes to mind, I thought I needed to somewhat prepare them for some things they would see and no doubt question or find strange.
I told them that we were very privileged here in Australia, and as such our housing was different, lifestyles were different, we may see some poverty to which they are largely sheltered from here, and so on. I focussed mainly on saying they could ask me anything they had questions about, but to wait until we were on our own, so we didn’t upset or offend anyone. I stressed this many times.
So we’ve been in Thailand for approximately 20 mins, and we’re in a taxi doing the airport - hotel transfer, and DD2 is so excited she can hardly contain herself. “I just can’t wait until we see the poor people mum!”
20 minutes. 20 minutes is how long we lasted in Thailand before I wanted to ground to swallow me whole.

DD1 (age 7) “if we be careful on roads, you’ll die before us”.

#102 Ellie bean

Posted 20 July 2019 - 11:48 PM

DS (who had just seen the Aladdin movie) this week to an Indian man wearing a red vest: “wow are you Aladdin?” Cue me sinking through the ground...

#103 Ellie bean

Posted 20 July 2019 - 11:51 PM

Ds is also a bit obsessed with death after the death of our pet earlier this year and keeps asking lots of questions. Today (after 100 other questions) it was “but WHY do people have to die mum”. Me: “I don’t know, there’s no answer to that.” Ds: “yes there is, just google it on your phone!”

#104 22Fruitmincepies

Posted 21 July 2019 - 12:05 AM

View PostEllie bean, on 20 July 2019 - 11:51 PM, said:

Ds is also a bit obsessed with death after the death of our pet earlier this year and keeps asking lots of questions. Today (after 100 other questions) it was “but WHY do people have to die mum”. Me: “I don’t know, there’s no answer to that.” Ds: “yes there is, just google it on your phone!”

DD suggests we ask “Siries”. I don’t even use Siri!

#105 maryanneK

Posted 21 July 2019 - 08:19 PM

Me to DS 3 this morning -finish your breakfast please, its time to go
Him - but mum, I haven't EVEN been up into space yet!

(as if its something we do every morning!)

#106 Blue Shoe

Posted 21 July 2019 - 09:20 PM

Little DS likes to pick up sticks any time we’re out near trees. He will often excitedly hold up any big ones he finds to show me, and tell me repeatedly “I have a big stick!”
Unfortunately, he can’t pronounce the S at the start and it gets collapsed to a D instead...
I know it’s very immature of me but it’s hard to stop a little giggle.

#107 cvbn

Posted 21 July 2019 - 09:34 PM

View PostBlue Shoe, on 21 July 2019 - 09:20 PM, said:

Little DS likes to pick up sticks any time we’re out near trees. He will often excitedly hold up any big ones he finds to show me, and tell me repeatedly “I have a big stick!”
Unfortunately, he can’t pronounce the S at the start and it gets collapsed to a D instead...
I know it’s very immature of me but it’s hard to stop a little giggle.

He he, my DD has trouble with hard C's, she is having speech pathology and I think I will miss 'Titty Tats'

#108 Fillama

Posted 22 July 2019 - 02:37 PM

Playing "I Spy" with at the time 4yr old dd. She spied something beginning with "f", we all eventually gave up.

A very proud smug dd proudly declares... "it's fong!!"

She was looking at a thong haha

#109 seayork2002

Posted 22 July 2019 - 02:45 PM

Can't say this is funny exactly but took me a while to work out why DS was talking about a doorbell, turns out as a boy (ie I do not have one but his dad does) he owns one.

(I will leave it to your imagination to see if you can work out any quicker what it is)

#110 Bethlehem Babe

Posted 22 July 2019 - 02:54 PM

View PostFillama, on 22 July 2019 - 02:37 PM, said:

Playing "I Spy" with at the time 4yr old dd. She spied something beginning with "f", we all eventually gave up.

A very proud smug dd proudly declares... "it's fong!!"

She was looking at a thong haha

Reigning eye spy champ here. About the same age. Something beginning with L.
Lectricity wires.

#111 Ayr

Posted 22 July 2019 - 03:00 PM

View PostBethlehem Babe, on 22 July 2019 - 02:54 PM, said:



Reigning eye spy champ here. About the same age. Something beginning with L.
Lectricity wires.

My friends son said exactly the same thing a few years back. They were driving through country side at the time so plenty of "L" things to come up with while trying to guess.

#112 james_c

Posted 22 July 2019 - 04:02 PM

When she was around 2, my daughter had a big peekaboo phase, where she would cover her face and then scream "'aboo"while pointing at you.
I took her to an artplay performance for young children, where a troop of aboriginal artists were doing story telling, singing and dancing. We all sat in a circle on the floor, the artists came, everybody was quiet while they set up, she ran and stood in front of them, and screamed what sounded exactly like "'abo" at the top of her lungs while pointing at them... Swallow me ground, please!

#113 Moo point

Posted 22 July 2019 - 04:50 PM

View PostWolf87, on 19 July 2019 - 06:35 PM, said:

I heard a really cool thing I might do, if you make an email address for your kid and send emails with this hilarious stuff you can then go back and read it with them when they are older. Might do it ������

I bought a gorgeous blank-page notebook from Kikki K and last year wrote a page a day summarising DS' day or writing about some random memory, and always having a "quote of the day". He loves when I read from it, and I love looking at it. I need to start writing in it again, and get a new book :)

#114 arc en ciel

Posted 22 July 2019 - 04:55 PM

My son is 17 but has a disability. He has carers and it has always been important to use appropriate language for body parts with him as you would do with young children (he is currently learning at about a 6 year old level). We were in Kmart the other day and when passing the toy section I said "Look at the dinosaurs." He looked shocked, turned to look and then said he thought I said vagina sores.

Everytime I see a dinosaur now I say " look at the vagina sore".

#115 Lunafreya

Posted 22 July 2019 - 05:00 PM

“Who wants to play axes?”

Says my son holding a foam axe.

#116 rosie28

Posted 22 July 2019 - 05:40 PM

View PostPooks Combusted, on 14 July 2019 - 10:29 PM, said:



DD calls them Kombrayas, and I stare down anyone who dares to correct her.

My DD calls her umbrella a “hanbella”. I don’t correct her.

#117 Hands Up

Posted 22 July 2019 - 05:53 PM

DS2 says hootie instead of hoodie and for some reason I find it adorable. He also says pritacy instead of privacy and always very earnestly.

#118 nasty snaugh

Posted 22 July 2019 - 07:51 PM

View PostBethlehem Babe, on 22 July 2019 - 02:54 PM, said:



Reigning eye spy champ here. About the same age. Something beginning with L.
Lectricity wires.

You just reminded me of one DS (8) had with eye spy just a few weeks ago

Something beginning with W

White

That's all, just white

#119 No Drama Please

Posted 22 July 2019 - 08:00 PM

We were looking at some old videos of the kids and DS saw one of himself as a baby he was like “omg I was still in my cylinder form”.

#120 steppingonlego

Posted 22 July 2019 - 08:10 PM

DD5 to DS7 “what’s a turd?”
DS7 “I think it’s a kind of frog”

#121 needs to get out

Posted 24 July 2019 - 04:17 PM

DS2 (aged 5) has been telling me all afternoon about the Lucky Grover in the backyard that works on Fridays to bring the daddy-long-legs back to life so they can kill the venomous spiders that have tusks.

I pictured something like this:

Posted Image

But he actually means this kind of thing:

Posted Image

:rofl:

Edited by Renovators delight, 24 July 2019 - 04:18 PM.


#122 MadMarchMasterchef

Posted 24 July 2019 - 04:44 PM

DD2 again when I told her off for something 'Help mum, Im growing up into a naughty adult!'

#123 NannyPlumPudding

Posted 24 July 2019 - 06:01 PM

DS2 calls tuna sushi - tuny. It will forever be known as tuny.

#124 Lime-Polka-Dot

Posted 24 July 2019 - 07:03 PM

DD age 5 - cuddling the cat while he's laying on the couch.  "Awww! I love him, he knows me better than I know myself!"

#125 Aughra

Posted 24 July 2019 - 07:33 PM

DS6 casually over breakfast one morning:

‘Soooo...I came out of your vagina did I?’




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