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What time does your 12 year old go to bed?

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#1 Twinmum+2

Posted 15 June 2019 - 10:16 AM

Currently our 12yo DS twins have a 9pm bedtime but they are allowed to read in bed till 9.30.  We haven't changed that in a couple of years and while I would be a bit more relaxed DH always insists on bed by 9pm. They don't get up till 7.30am so not super early risers either.

At what age did you start to relax a bit about bedtimes?

Edited by Twinmum+2, 15 June 2019 - 05:30 PM.

#2 jovana

Posted 15 June 2019 - 10:22 AM

DD is almost 12 (will be in August).

Her bedtime has been around 1030 for years now. Unless she's super tired, then she'll be gone by 10.
I think it's partially our fault since rest of us don't go to sleep before 10.

We do try to enforce earlier bedtime but it never worked with her.

#3 Mae55

Posted 15 June 2019 - 10:53 AM

I don’t think I’ll let my nearly 12 year old read this thread. His bedtime is flexible but we aim to be in bed at 8pm and then read. There’s not a strict lights off policy for him because while he does love to read he tends to get sleepy quickly once in bed and would generally be ready to sleep within half an hour. His natural wake time is around 6.30am-7am so he’d get 10 hours sleep most nights if he is asleep around 8.30pm. 9pm would be a late bedtime and too many of them would lead to him being very tired and emotional. After enough later nights he’ll start sleeping later but he is still grumpy - the timing of the sleep seems to make a difference as much as the total hours.

My nine year old has the same bedtime (to the 11 year old’s disgust) but tends to fall asleep later. He has always taken longer to get to sleep and has needed less sleep. He’d often be awake at 10pm when he was younger.

I teach Year 5 and 6s and quite a number of my students complain that they’re tired because they stayed up late the night before.

Edited by Mae55, 15 June 2019 - 10:54 AM.

#4 seayork2002

Posted 15 June 2019 - 11:05 AM

I prefer DS to be asleep rather than just 'in bed by x' so he has no specific  bedtime, he likes to read before bed so school nights earlier than weekends, he will be 12 soon

He is awake till 9 or so but probably in bed after his story by half 8 but can never say exact  as we watch a show
or shows  with him after dinner and dinner is all sorts of times

Edited by seayork2002, 15 June 2019 - 11:09 AM.

#5 -Emissary-

Posted 15 June 2019 - 11:17 AM

DS goes to bed at 9 and lights are off then.

We have a rule that all tv and electronics are off from 8:30. I find that this has helped him sleep much faster and he’s usually asleep by 9:30.

#6 Elizabethandfriend

Posted 15 June 2019 - 11:21 AM

My almost 12 year old has to be up by 6:15 for school and sport commitments 6 days a week.  She is meant to be in bed by 9pm but is not uncommon for her to take herself to bed earlier.

#7 Kreme

Posted 15 June 2019 - 11:43 AM

My 12 year old DD (almost 13) was going to bed around 9 but since starting high school it’s moved out to 9.30 because she was complaining about lying there awake and unable to get to sleep.

She gets up between 6.30 and 7 and functions well on that amount of sleep.

DS is 11.5 and he goes to bed at 8.30 and sleeps til 7.30. He’s always needed more sleep than DD.

#8 IamzFeralz

Posted 15 June 2019 - 11:50 AM

My 13 year old DS has 9.30 pm bed time. Devices off an hour earlier except for music to help him fall asleep.

#9 Jersey Caramel

Posted 15 June 2019 - 11:51 AM

11.5yo DS has to be in bed at/around 8.30, reading till 9pm. I'm sure he would be fine to stay up later,  but I need some time to myself/ with DH.

#10 melib

Posted 15 June 2019 - 11:56 AM

Our 12 yo son goes to bed at 8 pm, lights off by 8:30pm. He wakes up between 6 am and 6:30 am, so gets 9.5 to 10 hrs a night.

#11 RocktonResident

Posted 15 June 2019 - 11:59 AM

I allow half an hour each night tucking her in so we can chat, read whatever. So she's in bed 9pm, lights out at 9:30pm at which time she goes to sleep.

I have a rule of all technology off at 7pm though, so they aren't still hyped by screens at bedtime.

#12 BeAwesome

Posted 15 June 2019 - 12:08 PM

My nearly 11 year old goes to bed at around 9pm most nights. She has evening extra-curricular activities 4 nights a week, and needs down time afterwards to chill out in front of the tv or read a book.  She wakes up at around 6am no matter what time she goes to bed.  She seems to be getting the optimal amount of sleep, she wakes up ready to go, and rarely complains of being tired.

My 7 year old has started going to bed the same time as her sister,  she used to have an 8pm bedtime, but she'd just keep getting up out of bed for at least an hour each night (toilet, more drink, another book, etc) getting everyone frustrated, so we tried just letting her stay up til her sister went to bed, and she seems to drop off to sleep quickly now.  We have to drag her out of bed around 7am most days, she's not a morning person.  We do try and have a couple of earlier nights a week for her to catch up.

#13 Claudia Jean

Posted 15 June 2019 - 12:19 PM

Our bedtimes vary but generally they get ready/fluff around from 8.30 ish, in bed by 9ish and after stories/tuck in, it's about 9.30. My 12yo and 10yo share a room and I read aloud to them at bedtime (still!).  My 12yo falls asleep very quickly once in bed and settled.

#14 lotsofbots

Posted 15 June 2019 - 12:21 PM

My twins 12 go to bed at 8:30, no electronics after 7.

#15 kerilyntaryn

Posted 15 June 2019 - 01:04 PM

between 8.15 - 8.30

#16 Romeo Void

Posted 15 June 2019 - 01:10 PM

11 and almost 13 year old in bed by 8.30 (except weekends), read for 30 minutes then lights out. No electronics from dinner, so about 6.30

#17 Veritas Vinum Arte

Posted 15 June 2019 - 01:22 PM

We generally try and get in bed around 8pm then quiet reading. Some days he reads until 9pm other days he falls asleep as soon as head hit pillow. He awakes about 6.30am. We are getting to leave the house by 7.30am.

Similar for my nearly 14yo. He will do quiet time to about 9-9.30pm. His falling asleep is dependent upon when he takes his melatonin. Without melatonin he is up after midnight and up by 4am.

#18 yummymummycakes

Posted 15 June 2019 - 01:42 PM

12 & 14 yr olds both in bed asleep by 7.30.

The 12 yr old I have often found asleep by 6.30 lately. Both wake at approx 7am

#19 EsmeLennox

Posted 15 June 2019 - 01:48 PM

12 year old: 9-9.30.

Up at 7.30am.

14 year old: 9.30-10 (what time he actually goes to sleep...who knows?)

16 year old: Dunno. I’m in bed asleep by the time he goes to bed.

14/16 year old up with a fine-tuned amount of time to dress, eat and walk/run the 200m to school in time for school start at 8.35...so about 8.20!

#20 just roses

Posted 15 June 2019 - 01:55 PM

View Postmelib, on 15 June 2019 - 11:56 AM, said:

Our 12 yo son goes to bed at 8 pm, lights off by 8:30pm. He wakes up between 6 am and 6:30 am, so gets 9.5 to 10 hrs a night.
Exactly this.

#21 Octopodes

Posted 15 June 2019 - 02:05 PM

DS12 goes to bed at 8, but reads until 8.30-9pm. No intention of changing it for a while as he get up at 5-6am.

It will be relaxed only when he proves he is capable of recognising his own tired signs. He possesses no such ability atm.

Edited by Octopodes, 15 June 2019 - 02:06 PM.

#22 But seriously

Posted 15 June 2019 - 02:06 PM

during the week lights out at 9

#23 Kirralee2015

Posted 15 June 2019 - 02:30 PM

DS11 (turning 12 in two weeks) has been going to bed between 8.15-8.30 for about a year now.  On Fri-Sat nights, his bedtime is stretched to 9-9.30 depending on sporting commitments the following morning but invariably he will take himself off to bed before then.  He wakes up between 6.30-7.15am.

DS really needs a solid 9-10 hours sleep so this bedtime will not be changing anytime soon.  According to DS, a number of his mates go to sleep much later (9.30-11.30pm) but I've also spoken to some mums who send their sons to bed around 8pm.  Whatever works for the individual and the family!

#24 FuzzyChocolateToes

Posted 15 June 2019 - 04:04 PM

9 to 9:15 at the latest. She's up at 6:45.

#25 **Xena**

Posted 15 June 2019 - 04:49 PM

My 13yo is 8:30pm, my 15yo is 9:00pm and my 11yo is 8:00pm. They can all then read in bed for awhile.

They are about to move into new rooms and bedtime will be 9-9:30pm for all three.

Holidays they get an extra hour and weekends an extra half an hour.

Edited by **Xena**, 15 June 2019 - 04:50 PM.

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