Jump to content

12 year old boy not taking food to school


  • Please log in to reply
26 replies to this topic

#1 redchick

Posted 22 May 2019 - 06:00 AM

Hi all

One of my DS’s has recently said he is not hungry at school so has stopped taking snacks or lunch because he feels bad wasting food.

He’s always had a great appetite and happily eats breakfast (4 Weetbix with lots of milk), after school snack (home baking), dinner and after dinner snack (fruit).

I’m concerned that he won’t be able to concentrate at school but he said he is fine (and teachers haven’t said anything). He sometimes has lunchtime activities which makes eating lunch rushed but only a couple of days a week. He enjoys school so it is not related to anxiety etc. He’s fit and healthy and loves running around.

I’ve asked of there is anything different he would like for lunch (wraps etc) but he keeps saying he just isn’t hungry.

I’m assuming this phase will pass and when the next growth spurt hits he will be eating at school again but just wanted to see if anyone else’s child had done similar or if I am missing something.

TIA

RC



#2 xxyzed

Posted 22 May 2019 - 06:32 AM

My high school boys both don’t eat lunch at school. I insist the boys make their own lunch.One is on medication that makes him not hungry during the day. The other is just too lazy to make his and would prefer to go hungry. He just eats breakfast and then as soon as he gets home from school.

#3 Expelliarmus

Posted 22 May 2019 - 07:36 AM

My teens have been the same. They eat and eat at home but not at school.

I find it weird but they appear to do well at school and are still alive so I try not to sweat on it.

#4 laridae

Posted 22 May 2019 - 07:48 AM

He's not taking money to spend at the canteen instead?

#5 DirtyStreetPie

Posted 22 May 2019 - 07:54 AM

Hi OP. Maybe just get him to keep a non-perishable food item (like a bar or something) in his bag, just in case. That may be a good compromise, as it will give you some peace of mind while insuring he's not wasting food, since that's his concern.

I'd also let his teachers know, so they don't become worried when they discover he doesn't have any food!

#6 TheGreenSheep

Posted 22 May 2019 - 07:57 AM

My 12 DS has gone through stages of not eating lunch. As long as he is eating healthily the rest of the time I wouldn’t worry too much until he gives u a reason to worry. I found he usually had other things to do, like play sport etc and just wasn’t fussed. He continued to grow and never lost weight.

#7 ~J_WTF~

Posted 22 May 2019 - 07:58 AM

Is he at high school? They don’t monitor kids lunches like they do at primary.

If he isn’t going to eat it, I wouldn’t worry about it because he is right about waste.

One of my high schoolers (15yo) takes lunch, the other (12yo) takes a couple of snacks. I leave it up to them. They eat well the rest of the time.

#8 José

Posted 22 May 2019 - 07:59 AM

View PostDirtyStreetPie, on 22 May 2019 - 07:54 AM, said:



I'd also let his teachers know, so they don't become worried when they discover he doesn't have any food!

I don’t think high school teachers monitor the food situation like some primary schools do.
You might be surprised at the number of high schoolers who choose not to eat at school. I can’t imagine they have time to follow up with each of them and their families. They might ask the young person but if the student says there’s food at home but they choose not to bring it I think that would be the end of it.
I wouldn’t try to phone each of your child’s teachers.

#9 luke's mummu

Posted 22 May 2019 - 08:24 AM

Mine always takes lunch, but probably brings it home 50% of the time, and eats it for afternoon tea. He says he’s too busy on the oval, talking etc.    I do sometimes wonder if he takes cash for the canteen though

#10 seayork2002

Posted 22 May 2019 - 09:02 AM

My DS11 nearly 12 eats like a sparrow, always has, he takes snacks to school and a plain sandwich.

He brings his sandwich box home at the end of day, sometimes it is half eaten sometimes one or 2 mouthfuls out of it.

Most of the times his snacks are eaten.

He is fussy with what he eats but we have just accepted this is him.

He is given food (and money for the canteen) and we just leave it to him what he eats or not.

He has to have breakfast before school but sometimes this is only half a slice of toast.

He is willing to have porridge so I make this some mornings and try and give him variety within his fussiness.

We do think he was swapped at birth and DH and I LOVE food big time!

#11 scooty

Posted 22 May 2019 - 09:14 AM

My DS 10 is the same. For at least a year now he has really minimised the amount of lunch he wants to eat. A lot of it comes home, and the waste frustrates me. I've really eased back now and make sure that dinner is ready super early and he has a really big breakfast.

Otherwise I try and pack snacks and something yummy. Today I cooked mini dim sims and put them in a mini thermos. Not sure he'll eat them at school! I'm still trying. Trying to think of interesting school lunch food is hard when he wont try it lol.

I also have begun giving him some small coins, incase he wants something from the canteen, but he has hardly touched the money at all, so I know its not that he wants junk, its just that he's not hungry. I think I have to accept it.

I always have lots of food ready for when he gets home though.

#12 littlepickle

Posted 22 May 2019 - 09:15 AM

My 16 year old DD hasn’t taken a lunch to school after the first couple of weeks of year 7. She eats a great breakfast and cooks something when she gets home (eggs, bruschetta, grilled vegetables). If she has exams I insist that she takes a muesli bar/ muffin just in case.
My DS 14 does take lunch but nothing exciting -vegemite sandwich and snacks.

#13 perthgal3

Posted 22 May 2019 - 10:05 AM

My DS14 stopped taking lunch to school this year. He tells me he doesn't have time to eat. I don't know if this is the real reason or not?? (He does prefer junk food).

We have compromised - I still make his lunch but I leave it in the fridge and he eats it when he gets home. (I am happy to make it when I make my own in the morning). I am at work when he comes home.

It might be a teen thing.

#14 Lady Monteagle

Posted 22 May 2019 - 10:18 AM

I am so grateful for this thread!  DS9 doesn't want to eat at school as there are always other things he'd rather be doing.  The catch is that he is our Big Eater, so he comes home ravenous, and often more than a little hangry.  I was feeling quite bad about it all.  

Being primary school, the teachers do take an interest, so I've spoken with his teacher and sorted out that he can have some cut up crunchy fruit at his desk after lunch.  Working so far.  

Otherwise, he has a massive brekkie (which of course then contributes to not needing to eat during school hours), massive arvo tea, and an early dinner.  And early dinner then contributes to him waking up starving for a massive brekkie... and so it goes.

#15 4kids mostlysane

Posted 22 May 2019 - 10:20 AM

DD13 often doesn't take lunch but several "snack things" like fruit and museli bars.  She not a fan of sandwiches that have been in a lunch bag for several hours (even with an ice brick).  She has taken to salada's recently but still only with vegemite on them.

She has weirdly timed breaks too (IMO) of I think about 11.30 and then 1.30.  So she mostly just snacks.

She eats a proper breakfast before school and will generally have some fruit when she gets home as well as dinner so I'm not worried - she'd tell me if she was hungry...

#16 mayahlb

Posted 22 May 2019 - 10:39 AM

Maybe get him to take things that are basically non perishable. My oldest doesn't eat much at lunch or recess due to medication (my youngest barely eats either but that's a different cause). But just in case he is hungry he often takes an apple because they can go pretty much every day for a week and be fine, and maybe something like a muesli bar, or some other non perishable packaged thing. Come 3pm he's normally devouring a decent amount of food, so I'm not worried.

#17 lizzzard

Posted 22 May 2019 - 10:42 AM

Yep, my DS is disinclined to eat at school too - he also says he doesn't have time and I think it's a a 'real' reason because he'd much rather run around and play sport than sit and eat during his break. To be honest, from a learning perspective I think it might even be more important for some kids (my son included) to 'get the wriggles out' at lunchtime than spend the time eating - as long as they have enough fuel to get them through the day of course, which means a proper breakfast is really important.

That said, my DS10 Is also underweight and isn't good at eating breakfast either - so I did need to get some food into him during the day. This term I started giving him a lunch order every day because he actually does eat it. They have good system and get has a variety of hot food options during the week. I suspect he gulps it down and probably gives himself indigestion in the process! But it's been a good solution for us.

#18 CallMeFeral

Posted 22 May 2019 - 11:04 AM

How old is he?
I've just this week stopped sending lunch with DS, as it was coming back uneaten. He still has crunch and sip (which he half gets through) and a small container of cornflakes for recess (which used to come back uneaten, we'll see if that continues).
But yesterday he forgot to take his food and was hungry at the end of the day, but pretty unperturbed.

I dunno, I worry about it but I know if I try to force it he could just dispose of his lunch at school and pretend he ate it, so I'm running with it for now.

#19 Veritas Vinum Arte

Posted 22 May 2019 - 11:06 AM

I can say my mum in primary school called my lnches boomerang lunches as they always came home. I eat breakfast, afternoon tea and dinner but only eat lunch if I am actually out to lunch with people. Have always done this.

DS1 is in grade 8. Since grade 6 he has only taken 3 scotch finger biscuits to school to eat and will not always eat it.

I say let your child self regulate food if heis otherwise outside of school eating appropriately.

#20 seayork2002

Posted 22 May 2019 - 11:18 AM

View PostCallMeFeral, on 22 May 2019 - 11:04 AM, said:

How old is he?
I've just this week stopped sending lunch with DS, as it was coming back uneaten. He still has crunch and sip (which he half gets through) and a small container of cornflakes for recess (which used to come back uneaten, we'll see if that continues).
But yesterday he forgot to take his food and was hungry at the end of the day, but pretty unperturbed.

I dunno, I worry about it but I know if I try to force it he could just dispose of his lunch at school and pretend he ate it, so I'm running with it for now.

Yeah as much as I hate wasting food first off but my time making it at least when he brings the 'leftovers' at the end of the day home I can see what he has eaten.

I am getting him to have lunch order 2 days a week I would do 5 but he is that fussy!

For high school next year I may just give him money and snacks and just let him get on with it

I don't want him going without food but I think by then he will be old enough to sort it out himself

#21 ~THE~MAGICIAN~

Posted 22 May 2019 - 11:37 AM

My DD in Year 11 is the same. Hasn't taken lunch to school for a couple of years. It always gets stuck in her braces, so she hates eating in front of others. She has breakfast and food as soon as she gets home. I always make sure she has a few $$ on her though.

#22 redchick

Posted 22 May 2019 - 03:49 PM

Thanks everyone!

Reassuring to know he is not the only one.

Canteen food has to be pre-ordered so he isn’t buying anything. DS is in high school so I (thankfully) won’t have any teachers calling me.

I like the idea of non-perishable food just in case I wouldn’t be surprised if he does end up eating it.

We had another chat this afternoon about how important food is for building muscles. He’s also said he would like something other than sandwiches for lunch (he makes his own lunch) like pasta salad/leftovers.

:-)

RC




#23 TheGreenSheep

Posted 23 May 2019 - 08:25 PM

View Postredchick, on 22 May 2019 - 03:49 PM, said:

Thanks everyone!

Reassuring to know he is not the only one.

We had another chat this afternoon about how important food is for building muscles. He’s also said he would like something other than sandwiches for lunch (he makes his own lunch) like pasta salad/leftovers.

:-)

RC

That’s what we do. This week he has taken leftover Pad Thai, spag bol and tomorrow it’s nasi goreng. I occasionally buy cheese n bacon rolls. So he packs it the night before and grabs it in the morning, he’s happy to eat it cold.

#24 Chelli

Posted 23 May 2019 - 09:00 PM

The eating habits of my DD's changed in high school. One especially stopped wanting to eat certain foods and would also save up and open her lunch box the second she got in the car. As long as they're eating something at some time during the day, I wouldn't worry too much.

#25 teaspoon

Posted 23 May 2019 - 09:03 PM

I have a non-eater as well.

Since starting high school he will take a frozen flavoured milk (thaws by lunch), fruit, crackers or a muesli bar.

That's it. No sandwiches, wraps or leftovers. Ever




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

'My parenting style is Survivalist'

A helicopter or tiger mum, I am not.

8 mums reveal their favourite nappy bags

We asked a bunch of mums which nappy bags they love the most.

Why you shouldn't bother throwing a big first birthday party

If you're feeling the pressure to host an all-out, over-the-top shindig for your baby's birthday, I hereby grant you permission to throw the rules out the window.

The 24 baby names on the verge of extinction this year

If you're on the hunt for the perfect baby name and don't want a chart-topper like Oliver or Olivia, then do we have the list for you.

'My mum doesn't seem that interested in my baby'

Q: My mother and I have always been close, but now that I have a baby, she has not helped out as much as I thought she would.

New guidelines: "Bottle-feeding mums need support too"

Breast is best, but mums who can't, or choose not to breastfeed need support too.

Dads also struggle to 'have it all', study finds

Men and women both experience work-family conflict.

Language development may start in the womb

Study found babies can recognise foreign languages before birth.

Meet the baby born from an embryo frozen for 24 years

Experts say little Emma is a record breaking baby.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

From our network

Five things you need to know about flu and pregnancy

As the 2017 flu season begins in earnest, here?s what you need to know to protect yourself and baby.

Mum tips to keep your pre-baby budget in check

Money might be funny in a rich man's world (or so ABBA told us), but for the rest of us it's a major consideration – particularly before having a baby.

5 easy ways to make your maternity leave last longer

Maternity leave is a special time for you, your partner and your new little bundle. The last thing you want is for financial worries to stand in the way of that joy.

10 ways to keep your 'buying for baby' costs down

Becoming a parent is full of surprises – not least of all finding out that, for such small beings, babies cause a lot of chaos and expense.

5 ways to prepare to go from two incomes to one

Here are some ideas for getting that budget in shape, ready for being a one income family.

 

Baby Names

Need some ideas?

See what names are trending this year.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.