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whats the best parenting advice, trick or tip you've received or can give/or wish you knew back when


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#51 CCABW

Posted 07 May 2019 - 07:21 PM

Drop your housework standards. Sleep and you time is more important

Go for a walk in the fresh air every day. Good for baby, good for your mental health

Cloth nappies can be used for everything. Chuck cloths, lining car seats, putting under baby in the cot (for spews and poonamis)...

Breastfeeding is hard. It’s not the serene experience they make it out to be in the pre natal classes

Toilet training is not a competition

Make dinner early in the day as the cluster feed time is right at dinner time

Do what works. Until it doesn’t work any more and then do something else.

Learn to make coffee/hang washing/eat/cook one handed

The only thing you can rely on is that things will change.

Don’t take advice from randoms on the internet ;)

#52 PrincessPeach

Posted 07 May 2019 - 07:42 PM

Be adaptable to your baby.

You might not want to bottler feed/use a dummy/rock them to sleep/baby wear etc, etc, etc - but if it results in a settled baby then DO IT.

Also get your baby used to sleeping on the go, makes life a zillion times easier when you have another to deal with - plus if they transfer from cot to car seat to pram you are laughing.

Also there are no awards given for motherhood.

Edited by PrincessPeach, 07 May 2019 - 07:44 PM.


#53 blueskies12

Posted 07 May 2019 - 07:58 PM

Don't worry about what anyone else in your mother's group is doing. They also haven't got a clue, they are just better at faking it.

Some babies are easy and some babies are hard. Some sleep when you want them to, and others do not no matter what you try. Some cry about nearly everything and others do not cry about much. Babies have their own temperaments from the beginning.

Be you, be proud, have confidence in how you want to do things.

#54 cinnabubble

Posted 07 May 2019 - 08:02 PM

You can start toilet training as early as you like, but the child will be in charge of when you finish it.

Being a parent is a very long marathon. Try to leave some fuel in the tank for later. You’ll need it.

#55 mlztwins

Posted 07 May 2019 - 08:52 PM

Keep baby wrapped/swaddled for night feeds.

#56 two_ones

Posted 07 May 2019 - 10:20 PM

Make sure you are actually in some of the photos that are taken of bub in those first few days (even though you will probaby feel like you've been run over by a bus).

The other day I was looking at the photos taken in hospital from when DS1 was born, and they are about 80% of him with DH, 15% with grandparents or other visitors, and 5% with me. 😔

#57 Pooks Combusted

Posted 07 May 2019 - 10:46 PM

You’re not doing anything wrong. Your judgement is solid. Trust yourself. And ask for help. You matter too.

(I wouldn’t believe my excellent advice though, because I still don’t.)

Also, stop thinking things are going to get better one day because they won’t. It’s energy wasted, and much better spent on learning from the kickass women around you how to handle sh*t.

#58 YodaTheWrinkledOne

Posted 08 May 2019 - 12:00 PM

View PostHellbent, on 07 May 2019 - 12:40 PM, said:

When purchasing first "big bed" make it a double or a queen straight off the bat.  Single beds are a struggle with a sick/unsettled kid and they'll be 12 before you know it.
or a king single. (because that's big enough for an adult and a child, particularly if you don't have super big rooms)

KS has the length of a queen bed (useful if you are likely to have long/tall kids) but it's not as wide as a double bed (width is in between a standard single and a double). Perfect for a growing teenager!

#59 Crombek

Posted 08 May 2019 - 12:39 PM

This too shall pass. But in the meantime accept the help. None of this means you are failing.

You only have to be a good enough parent approximately 30% of the time for healthy attachment. Relax. Make space for the mistakes. Your beautiful child wouldn’t be who they are without those either.

#60 Ellie bean

Posted 08 May 2019 - 03:21 PM

If you can’t get any help, therefore accepting it isn’t an option, you will probably still be ok- eventually!

#61 Lily-bee

Posted 08 May 2019 - 03:30 PM

It's ok if you don't 'love it' all of the time....you are not suppose to.

It's ok if you don't fall in love with your baby the minute you see him/her. Doesn't make you a bad parent.

You matter as well....don't lose yourself while you are being a parent.

Talk openly and honestly with your partner. They are going through a massive change as well.

#62 Lallalla

Posted 08 May 2019 - 03:38 PM

Tell your toddler the brown spot on bananas are honey spots.

A friend told me this before my oldest first asked, she took it hook line and sinker and convinced her younger sisters of it for me.

#63 DebbieDoesSanta

Posted 08 May 2019 - 03:38 PM

Things don't get easier, they get different.

You'll forever worry about something.

And more specific regarding boys in their mid-teens...

"Give him space to think and do for himself and he will come back to you!"

#64 Daffy2016

Posted 08 May 2019 - 03:40 PM

View PostLallalla, on 08 May 2019 - 03:38 PM, said:

Tell your toddler the brown spot on bananas are honey spots.

A friend told me this before my oldest first asked, she took it hook line and sinker and convinced her younger sisters of it for me.

A friend started calling bruises on fruit ‘fairy kisses’. Only it backfired and now her kids try to convince her to buy the most ‘kissed’ fruit and veggies :laugh:

#65 PrincessPeach

Posted 08 May 2019 - 04:07 PM

View PostYodaTheWrinkledOne, on 08 May 2019 - 12:00 PM, said:


or a king single. (because that's big enough for an adult and a child, particularly if you don't have super big rooms)

KS has the length of a queen bed (useful if you are likely to have long/tall kids) but it's not as wide as a double bed (width is in between a standard single and a double). Perfect for a growing teenager!

Plus they are easier to make in the middle of the night, because you will at least once in your life need to make multiple sheet changes in one night.

#66 Abernathy

Posted 08 May 2019 - 05:12 PM

Co-sleep if you want to. We tried everything to get ours to sleep in cot (sleep schools etc...) but when we chucked them in bed with us we were all much happier and finally got some sleep. Wish I’d done it sooner!

Someone also gave me the tip “ just add water” as a solution to almost anything. When they’re miserable/bored/ tired just pop them in the bath, let them play in the shower, give them a bucket of water and a paint brush and ask them to “paint” the driveway, let them wash some dishes in the sink etc... etc.... Works wonders.

#67 just2ofus

Posted 08 May 2019 - 07:41 PM

Probably not overly useful but what I wish someone told me when DS was a baby - soak him up...sit on the lounge and hold him, take in all his beautiful perfectness, imprint it in your brain, smell him, nurse him, cuddle him, watch him...don’t be in such a rush to get “things”’done 😊

#68 purpleblaze

Posted 08 May 2019 - 07:55 PM

Sort out the baby's and your sleep.  With sleep you can tackle anything.

Everything with babies/toddlers is about routine and timing.  Miss the window and all goes to hell.

#69 Chelli

Posted 08 May 2019 - 07:55 PM

Stop! You don't have to be busy all the time. Beathe them in because they are only that small once and then it's over.

#70 RichardParker

Posted 08 May 2019 - 09:36 PM

View PostPooks Combusted, on 07 May 2019 - 10:46 PM, said:


Also, stop thinking things are going to get better one day because they won’t. It’s energy wasted, and much better spent on learning from the kickass women around you how to handle sh*t.

This is really true. Things don’t get better- you get better at dealing with sh*tty things.  Sometimes, you get so good that you end up creating something entirely amazing that you never would have done would it not have been for the boot-camp that is Motherhood.

#71 Wot*A*Lot*Of_____

Posted 08 May 2019 - 09:58 PM

Towelling cloth nappies make the best chuck cloths.

If you can, lay down or sleep when the baby does.

If you can, eat healthy in the first 6wks. However if you can’t eat healthy, then just eat.



#72 ABabyPlease

Posted 09 May 2019 - 01:03 PM

From my Aunt - a clean house is the sign of a bad mother!

Also, just lie down whenever you can.

#73 MsLaurie

Posted 09 May 2019 - 01:11 PM

Let random people cuddle the baby, and indulge the elderly ladies and gents who stop to peer in the pram. You’ll make their day and make the community a happier place.

If at all possible, get your partner to take a decent paternity leave and then go part-time (perhaps a nine-day fortnight or similar). If both of you are used to the baby, both of you will get competent and trust each other’s parenting quickly.

#74 Ozquoll

Posted 09 May 2019 - 01:56 PM

View PostMsLaurie, on 09 May 2019 - 01:11 PM, said:

Let random people cuddle the baby, and indulge the elderly ladies and gents who stop to peer in the pram. You’ll make their day and make the community a happier place.
This was such a delightful surprise to me when I became a mother - I didn’t know him much happiness my baby would bring to so many people. He was a crowd favourite at our regular round of shops (chemist, coffee shop, bakery, etc), with our neighbours and just with random strangers on the street. It was heart-warming to know so many people liked him.

#75 Horangi

Posted 09 May 2019 - 07:35 PM

Don't use nappy rash creams (with zinc oxide) with modern cloth nappies because it wrecks them. Use coconut oil instead. (I learned it the hard way.)




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