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Nap time frustration


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#1 Riotproof

Posted 04 February 2017 - 11:17 AM

Miss 2 is quite consistently declining the opportunity to nap. She clearly needs one, but is determined to power through nonetheless. She will not fall asleep even in the car.
So, I have enacted quiet time.
In her cot, couple books, all the soft toys with sleepy time music playing.

Yesterday she was happy to do it, but today she has a severe case of FOMO because everyone is home.

It is quite seriously doing my head in. I'm not even getting anything done during the quiet time because it is anything but quiet. She is sleeping 12 hours at night and I do love the early night, but nap time has me wanting to cry.

I don't even want solutions. I have tried everything. She's got a stubbornness that I can't get through on this. It feels like there is no solution but waiting for her to gtf over it. She is a delight most of the time. Even overtired she's mostly a happy soul.

Edited by Riotproof, 04 February 2017 - 11:20 AM.


#2 22Fruitmincepies

Posted 04 February 2017 - 12:02 PM

I have given up on nap time, but I was chatting to a friend about quiet time, as I can't get DD to do it. My friend puts out 5 m&ms, and tells her 3yo that every time she has to come in to remind about being quiet, mum will eat one of the m&ms. Apparently it has worked brilliantly. I think my friend is an evil genius.

#3 Lou-bags

Posted 04 February 2017 - 12:11 PM

My DS1 had a few nap strike periods. They sucked. He never ever napped in his cot either, right from birth. And I've been driving him down for naps for over a year now. He's just one of those kids who can power through no matter how tired he is. I feel for you. Fingers crossed your DD is napping again soon OP

I can't wait until he finally won't need a day sleep anymore.

22T I am so going to try that trick of your friend's!!

Edited by Nasty-bags, 04 February 2017 - 12:12 PM.


#4 Lallalla

Posted 04 February 2017 - 12:49 PM

I hope you find a solution soon. It is painful having a 2 year old who just won't sleep, even if they are good natured.

Around the time DD1 turned 2 she became impossible to get to nap short of lying next to her the whole nap and even then only after flapping about for 20 minutes and only for half an hour - it was totally impractical especially since she had twin newborn sisters. After months of trying everything 1 day I was totally frustrated with her (and overtired) and just letting her do her thing and she fell asleep in the living room in front of ABC News on one of those little kid foam fold out couches. I've been getting her to nap there pretty consistently ever since (maybe 5 months), though still often only for 30-40 min. And it has to be the dulcet tones of ABC news too, even the cricket or 7 news is too interesting apparently.

#5 Riotproof

Posted 04 February 2017 - 12:57 PM

That is genius! I don't think she's ready for bribes though. I realised yesterday she complied with quiet time so well because it was what she wanted to do at the time anyway. When I got her out of her cot, she continued to read books in her room for another 30 minutes. That's why i'm so annoyed! I thought we had a solution. But alas, tiny girl has a mind of her own.

Loubags, you can't mean that!

I have friends who's children napped almost right up until going to school. They had to wean them off it. And they weren't having stupidly late bedtimes either.

#6 Riotproof

Posted 04 February 2017 - 01:01 PM

 Lallalla, on 04 February 2017 - 12:49 PM, said:

I hope you find a solution soon. It is painful having a 2 year old who just won't sleep, even if they are good natured.

Around the time DD1 turned 2 she became impossible to get to nap short of lying next to her the whole nap and even then only after flapping about for 20 minutes and only for half an hour - it was totally impractical especially since she had twin newborn sisters. After months of trying everything 1 day I was totally frustrated with her (and overtired) and just letting her do her thing and she fell asleep in the living room in front of ABC News on one of those little kid foam fold out couches. I've been getting her to nap there pretty consistently ever since (maybe 5 months), though still often only for 30-40 min. And it has to be the dulcet tones of ABC news too, even the cricket or 7 news is too interesting apparently.

I had to laugh at abc news!
I decided that since it's the weekend, I would have quiet time when I got her up. I hid in my room intending to read but fell asleep. it was so quiet, I had the fleeting thought she may have crashed on the sofa. Nope, watching Carebears.

She is now rolling about crying because she can't get her sandals on. Not sure where she thinks she's going.

#7 22Fruitmincepies

Posted 04 February 2017 - 01:10 PM

Lou-bags, not even driving is working for us these days. And on days she does nap at daycare, she is awake until 9pm! I need my evening. She is pretty ok on days she doesn't nap, and is out like a light by 7pm, which is bliss. I think we are reaching the end of naps...hence the need for quiet time.

#8 Tinned asparagus

Posted 04 February 2017 - 01:11 PM

I gave up on DS1s day sleep when he moved to a bed at about 22 months. Not worth the angst of late bed time. We just had very boring afternoons from 3pm onwards to minimise the tantrums etc.

#9 Lou-bags

Posted 04 February 2017 - 01:24 PM

We're kind of similar 22T.

DS1 is up until 8.30-9pm with a nap, but is a crabby a-hole without one. Some days he's ok though, then I don't worry about the nap and he goes to sleep 7.30-8pm. The ok days are getting more frequent so I think we're on the way to no naps too. Driving still works on his crabby days. I just need him to sleep in a bit later every day and we'd be fine. If he's up before 6.30 then I know it's going to have to be a nap day.

#10 22Fruitmincepies

Posted 04 February 2017 - 01:35 PM

 Nasty-bags, on 04 February 2017 - 01:24 PM, said:

We're kind of similar 22T.

DS1 is up until 8.30-9pm with a nap, but is a crabby a-hole without one. Some days he's ok though, then I don't worry about the nap and he goes to sleep 7.30-8pm. The ok days are getting more frequent so I think we're on the way to no naps too. Driving still works on his crabby days. I just need him to sleep in a bit later every day and we'd be fine. If he's up before 6.30 then I know it's going to have to be a nap day.

DD doesn't get at all grumpy, she just has a bit less patience. I certainly give her opportunities to nap in the car, and when she needs one she will fall asleep fast. Last Sunday she was at my parent's in the morning, and they were driving her back to ours at lunchtime. My mum says she was chatting away in the back for the first minute, then when silent and when my my looked back she was fast asleep. When she doesn't need one no amount of driving around will induce her to sleep, sigh.

#11 meohmy

Posted 04 February 2017 - 03:32 PM

Mine gave up at bit before 2.5 yrs and 21 months.

Quiet time did not work at all. In the end I just figured it was easier to get on with my day and not fight them to sleep or for quiet time. Exhausting but less frustrating (not wrestling with them or arguing) which was actually the easier thing for me.

I was actually glad not to have to worry about or consider their naps.

#12 Ellie bean

Posted 04 February 2017 - 03:35 PM

Dd dropped her nap right on 2 and hasn't had a nap since, she used to stick her hand down her throat and make herself vomit if I tried to put her in the cot, she can out- stubborn anyone, that's when we introduced an afternoon movie...

#13 Riotproof

Posted 04 February 2017 - 03:51 PM

 Ellie bean, on 04 February 2017 - 03:35 PM, said:

Dd dropped her nap right on 2 and hasn't had a nap since, she used to stick her hand down her throat and make herself vomit if I tried to put her in the cot, she can out- stubborn anyone, that's when we introduced an afternoon movie...

I'm going to thank my lucky stars on that one!

And yes, pp, it is a bit liberating. But only when they are at the age where they don't lose it over stupid stuff. She likes to do everything herself. Woe betide if you offer to help and it is not wanted. I took her swimming just now and she absolutely refuses to jump and grab my neck. She actively pretends she is going to and then shoots to the side. Ds was so happy to be swimming, he just followed the activities from lessons. She spends the time trying to get away from me and telling me to go swim.

Going to be an early night at least, she's eating curry and rice and rather enjoying herself.

As an aside I think language and learning are playing a part. She simply can't stop talking, even at bedtime. It's exhausting.

#14 mandala

Posted 04 February 2017 - 05:14 PM

 Riotproof, on 04 February 2017 - 01:01 PM, said:

I had to laugh at abc news!


My aunt told me that she would put a video of the 7pm bulletin on for my cousin every bedtime for years! Bedtime was often conveniently adjusted via the video.

I've got another inconsistently napping 2yo. At least he doesn't get insanely overtired and wake up at night if he skips it, but he's also far, far more destructive trying to get out of his cot. I think he could possibly do without it at least some days - I feel like I need the nap more than he does after wrestling him into the cot and sleeping bag, and attempting to keep him in ther!

#15 Riotproof

Posted 04 February 2017 - 05:47 PM

Honestly. The way she says "ni night, mummy" would make you think she is a perfect little angel.

#16 Riotproof

Posted 04 February 2017 - 07:41 PM

In bed at 6.45, I heard one shout at 7ish and then 7.15 when I checked she blissfully asleep, hugging her book.

#17 MsLaurie

Posted 04 February 2017 - 09:55 PM

I've occasionally had luck with sitting in the armchair with miss2 with food network or the endless House Hunter shows on quietly. Somehow the treat of the tv but the boringness of the content will get her to sit still long enough to doze off. Of course then you either lose all sensation in your arms or risk a high degree of difficulty transfer to cot...

#18 EmmDasher

Posted 05 February 2017 - 06:37 PM

At right on 2 DD went through an anti-napping phase. I'd put tangled on and she'd eventually fall asleep on her flip out sofa.

We introduced a gro clock & a new sibling and she's gone back to napping in her bed properly.

#19 Riotproof

Posted 24 February 2017 - 12:03 PM

I really start thinking yes, we have a pattern and it will hold and then she mocks me.

We'd been having lovely 1 hour sleeps from 11-12. Then she started not again. Quiet time lasts about 30 minutes, which is fine. Then she started going to sleep at school pickup time, highly inconvenient and evidence the nap is required, imo.

So, we are either having a nap and going to bed at 8-8.30 waking at 6ish. Or we are having no nap and going to bed unhappily at 6ish, waking at 6ish.

So after an hour, I give up for today.

#20 mandala

Posted 25 February 2017 - 08:16 AM

Sounds like us, although DS2 will usually fall asleep in the car for me. It's such a pain!

#21 Riotproof

Posted 25 February 2017 - 08:27 AM

I'm glad it's not just me, but sorry for it too. It is a pain.

Particularly as it seems to be such a full on age, so much talking, so many brilliant ideas going through her head. I need a break from her!

Today, she woke at 7.30! I woke at 6, and went to check on her happily dosing away, so I went back to bed. So, I guess I should aim for nap at 12? I feel like she has a window and if I miss it, everything is hell. With ds if he powered through without a nap, he'd be cranky at bedtime, but otherwise quite happy. Her emotions are like a chocolate wheel on no doze.

Edited by Riotproof, 25 February 2017 - 08:29 AM.


#22 ekbaby

Posted 25 February 2017 - 08:49 AM

How old is your DD? Mine is 2 years 5 months. I wish she would just give up day naps all together as at the moment they are more hassle than they are worth.

She rarely naps unless she is in the car. Sometimes she only naps for 20 mins. Any nap, even 5 minutes, is enough to keep her awake until 10pm at night.

I have stopped trying to put her to sleep but then she randomly falls asleep at 4pm on a cushion somewhere, or in the car (we have to drive older kids to activities in the afternoons some days)

My oldest gave up day sleeps at 2 years 3 months, things were much better once he had an early bed time and not an hour or more of battling every day to get him to nap. Luckily we didn't need to go out in the arvo so no car sleeps. I replaced nap time with an hour of the Wiggles or a DVD every day. I did the same with my middle when he stopped having day sleeps (can't remember exactly when but around 2.5 years). Those 2 didn't have much or any TV before then so I didn't feel that bad about it. Poor DD has a stack of TV already because that's what we do in the evenings when she won't go to bed :/  an hour of TV to replace nap time would probably be better.

#23 Riotproof

Posted 25 February 2017 - 08:54 AM

She's 2 and 1 month, so I think a bit early to give it up altogether. Though, tbh if she was a bit more stoic about it, I'd be tempted. Ds never fell asleep in the car after about 8 months. He just wasn't interested, so I know when she's doing that in the late afternoon, it's exhaustion.

I allow 5 hours after nap finishes as bedtime, subject to variance of course, but the latest I'll encourage is 8.30pm.

I think if I was faced with 10pm bedtime, I'd be wiping out naps completely.

#24 mandala

Posted 25 February 2017 - 09:12 AM

We have up to a 9pm bedtime with naps, depending on nap timing and duration. I'm not okay with that. However, if I solidly cut out naps, I'd not be able to go out in the car or stroller past 11am.

I tend to plan my day around whether I need DS2 to have a tactical car nap! That way I control the timing and duration as much as possible.

#25 22Fruitmincepies

Posted 25 February 2017 - 09:24 AM

DD napped 4 days this week at daycare, but was still asleep by 8 and was waking at 7.10. Yesterday was no nap, she was asleep at 6.50 and is still asleep at 7.20. I can only assume she is having a growth spurt or something.

Anyway I get you on the tatical naps thing Mandala - that was us until recently. Now I aim for no naps and it's annoying when she falls asleep when I was counting on an early bedtime!




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