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Breastfeeding advice in the Parents Room....

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#26 Nastyflea

Posted 11 January 2017 - 02:25 PM

I have no issue with who uses the cubicles, what I do have issue with is going into a parent's room to (BF) Dd and seeing 2 cubicles full and the one couch remaining with a FF baby by her mum and the other 2 seats taken up by the 2 men with her.

If you're not feeding a baby at least offer to stand up so other people can sit to feed.

Yes I'm sure I could have asked them to move but I had PND and anxiety and breastfeeding in public was hard enough as it was, without men taking up chairs in the parent's room.

I fed in the car a few times. Radio on, undercover out of the sun, no one looking.

#27 superhotd

Posted 11 January 2017 - 02:38 PM

Thanks for all your feedback Girls.

I knew both cubicles were taken by FF's as one Lady had the curtain open & the other the husband was heating the bottle up for his partner in the cubicle.

My mistake here was assuming the cubicles were designed more for breastfeeders, my apologies to those I have offended with that assumption.

I am a shy girl so could not ask a Mum or Dad to move just so I could feed.

Anyways, I have learnt my lesson & for the record after a rocky start with much perseverance I love breastfeeding & am so proud I can.

#28 lucky 2

Posted 11 January 2017 - 02:59 PM

No, the rooms are for infant feeding irrespective of the method. But they are not just for feeding, that's the only place that nappy changing facilities are situated, usually.
Both FF and BF mothers might need to sit down somewhere quiet, could be post birth exhaustion, C/S recovery or perineal trauma.
Or going through the distractible baby stage.
Could be that mothers (and fathers) might think this is where you "should" feed your baby.
I only used them for nappy changes as they usually stank to high heaven with poo, but they seem to be a bit bigger these days so that might help dissipate the smell.
Try and bf in a cafe, perhaps at the back or in a corner if you wish. You could also turn the seat so it gives you more privacy.
Maybe your confidence will pick up so you will have more freedom. :)

#29 rosie28

Posted 11 January 2017 - 03:40 PM

View PostJBH, on 11 January 2017 - 01:32 PM, said:

Generally first in best dressed.  That said, when my babies were a bit older, if I happened to use a parents' room I would have stood for someone with a tiny baby.

Edit: nothing to do with breast or bottle, just because I remember how it was to be a nervous parent of a really little baby, needing everything for feeding to be just so.

Yep this- although even when mine were tiny they happily breastfed while I was standing so I'd have moved if someone looked like they were going to sit on the floor.

#30 casime

Posted 11 January 2017 - 03:58 PM

First in, best dressed, but I think it's acceptable to ask a grandparent/partner/friend to stand up if they are taking up a chair and there are no others available.

#31 Overtherainbow

Posted 11 January 2017 - 04:08 PM

I found I often fed in the car.  I could park in the shade, feed bub and then head to the shops.  

My first, I was more comfortable feeding in private; I was happy to feed the others in more open surrounding but there are still limited quiet spots.

Cafes are great but you can't sit there without purchasing.  The rest of the seating at shops are very public seating.

I think it would be great to have some general quiet seating for parents feeding and for elderly or those with disabilities to just sit and catch their breath.  Unfortunately, it wouldn't make any money though.

Is there room for more seating where you went?  Could you suggest they add additional seats (not necessarily in cubicles?

#32 MadnessCraves

Posted 11 January 2017 - 04:09 PM

First in first served.

Those chairs are for ANY feeding carer. Regardless of breast or bottle If you need a seat taken up by a non feeding person in there, find that voice to ask if they can move.

Ultimately you could also just put in feedback to centre management about lack of chairs. The feeding rooms at the nearest big store normally has a cubicle or two and a lounge.

Ultimately the cubicles are not just for breastfeeding. Some mothers also feed bottle feeding is just as private as breastfeeding, especially when unwanted unhelpful advice is dished out when you're out.
Some like you feel shy about bottle feeding. It doesn't matter how you feed your baby, no one gets more rights over seating because they're feeding one way opposed to the other.

I've personally made complaints to centre management when once I walked into a parents room to find two men using the room to hold a work conference with zero children in there. They took both cucible chairs and had their laptop and papers out. I didn't feel safe or comfortable feeding there.

#33 Aerith

Posted 11 January 2017 - 04:22 PM

This is why I use a BF shawl. I can feed anywhere, good for distracted or fussy babies, I won't spray anything or anyone with forceful letdown, and privacy. Also, department stores like Myer and David Jones also have their own parent rooms which are usually not as busy as general shopping centre ones (although can be a bit dirty..)

But yes, first in first served. Everyone is entitled to same amount of privacy.

#34 Fright bat

Posted 11 January 2017 - 04:35 PM

What's wrong with sitting on the floor?

#35 Prioritising Pooks

Posted 11 January 2017 - 04:39 PM

People use those cubicles for expressing too. Even if you see someone heating a bottle, they may also be expressing. I think expressing mums should get the highest priority of all for a private seat! I have a friend who is expressing and using a special bottle for a cleft palate and I think she should have a red carpet rolled out on her way to the parents room ;) I've only ever used the curtained area to only bottle feed if there was no other seating and I think people do generally try to leave the space for those who need it.

#36 Nastyflea

Posted 11 January 2017 - 04:53 PM

Floors are filthy in public areas. I can't get up and down off the floor easily, especially with a newborn and recovering from the birth.

We shouldn't HAVE to sit on the floor, there should be enough seating ideally.

#37 liveworkplay

Posted 11 January 2017 - 04:57 PM

3 kids breastfed and I never understood why people would voluntarily sit in the poo stench of a parents room. One of mine was a sticky beak hen feeding but I always managed to find a quite, poo smelling free, spot to feed.

Edited by liveworkplay, 11 January 2017 - 04:57 PM.

#38 Mummy_Em

Posted 11 January 2017 - 04:57 PM

View PostThe Fright B4 Xmas, on 11 January 2017 - 04:35 PM, said:

What's wrong with sitting on the floor?

If you are comfortable then nothing, but if your baby fusses or you are still getting their latch right, or still recovering post-birth it is difficult.

I remember sitting down on the floor about 2 weeks post c/section with dd2, to try to engage dd1 in a speech therapy assessment. When it came time to get up I thought I might be stuck down there! But I managed to get up with only a little discomfort.

#39 Riotproof

Posted 11 January 2017 - 05:01 PM

View PostStarletta, on 11 January 2017 - 01:21 PM, said:

First in best dressed. It's definitely not any easier to bottle feed standing up then it is to breastfeed standing up?

Why is it a hard one? Why would breastfeeders get preference?

I don't understand either. In most shopping centres I frequent, there are maybe two feeding rooms and also a sofa outside with some toddler play stuff.
But failing that, you've got no option but to wait or go elsewhere. Waiting I know is not really an option in most cases, but TBH I wouldn't have thought the floor was either.

#40 Starletta

Posted 11 January 2017 - 05:15 PM

In case you're ever in Castle hill, the DJs parent room is always clean, empty and quiet. I've never seen anyone else in there! It's at the back of he store and it's like no one knows it's there. I always head to a department store if we needed to use a toilet or feed, good for the early days when you're not as confident. Hasn't failed me yet.

#41 Seven of Nine

Posted 11 January 2017 - 05:15 PM

I remember that it hadn't occurred to me that bottle feeding parents might want to sit in a cubicle to feed when my oldest was a newborn many years ago. I used the parents room to feed because I was still learning and when Baby came off my breast was completely exposed. In fact my breast was completely exposed at many times throughout each feed! OP your question was a reasonable one.

Several kids later I know more about babies and I can see many reasons why people might want to feed in a cubicle. I also haven't fed anyone in a parents room since my oldest.

Edited by Seven of Nine, 11 January 2017 - 05:16 PM.

#42 Kallie88

Posted 11 January 2017 - 05:30 PM

I would say first in first serve, there's really no other way to do it i don't think. It's a shame you had to sit on the floor - though i get it, i physically couldn't bf standing, would not work. But might have just fed on a chair elsewhere, though i realise that's a comfort and privacy thing too.

#43 Nasty Bunsen

Posted 11 January 2017 - 05:45 PM

View PostThe Fright B4 Xmas, on 11 January 2017 - 04:35 PM, said:

What's wrong with sitting on the floor?

Thinking back to my post partum self with 5kg of baby to juggle the problem with sitting on the floor is getting down there and getting back up again!

#44 Appleaday

Posted 11 January 2017 - 05:49 PM

OP I suggest one of those breast feeding aprons so you can fed anywhere (if you are more comfortable covered that is), I used one religiously for my first but my second I didn't care as much but always liked to wear a breast feeding top so minimal nipple was exposed.

The best thing about the aprons is the they loop out at the front so baby's head is not actually covered like with a blanket.

#45 unicycle

Posted 11 January 2017 - 06:04 PM

View PostThe Fright B4 Xmas, on 11 January 2017 - 04:35 PM, said:

What's wrong with sitting on the floor?

It is the getting off the floor again, holding the baby, that completely stuffed my sacrum for the next three months: thanks for nothing,  relaxin.

#46 CallMeFeral

Posted 11 January 2017 - 06:09 PM

View PostOvertherainbow, on 11 January 2017 - 04:08 PM, said:

I think it would be great to have some general quiet seating for parents feeding and for elderly or those with disabilities to just sit and catch their breath.  Unfortunately, it wouldn't make any money though.

Actually my local Westfield has some lovely random seating areas interspersed throughout the shops. It's really nice actually, and yes I often see seniors resting, people (presumably) waiting for their other halves to come back from somewhere, and my kids often wanted to stop and sit at them as they were quite pleasant looking.
They also have a random area with beanbags and free wifi. All really nice, and way more pleasant to breastfeed in than the parents rooms!

#47 Avocado tree

Posted 11 January 2017 - 06:25 PM

I had terrible time getting DS1 to latch, having to expose practically all of myself to get him on.  Curtains and privacy were crucial for me to feel comfortable, and for him to concentrate.  I had and have no interest in normalising breast feeding for others. It was pretty much all about me and my bub, rightly or wrongly.  Some parents rooms were spacious and clean ,and others not so much.  In the end for me , I worked out that going back to my car, parked in the multistory carpark of my local shopping centre (so in the shade) , doors locked, gave me room and privacy and I have to say I have some lovely memories of me and bub quietly feeding in the back seat.  Cried when we sold that car for that reason.

#48 Fresh Start

Posted 11 January 2017 - 06:28 PM

View PostThe Fright B4 Xmas, on 11 January 2017 - 04:35 PM, said:

What's wrong with sitting on the floor?

They're festy?

#49 Fright bat

Posted 11 January 2017 - 06:42 PM

I understand there are specific reasons why some people specifically can't get off the floor. But that's not how it was worded in the OP, which seemed to make a universal claim against the undesirability of the floor.

Anyway, that's all a bit off topic. I do think anyone should be able to use a parents room to feed a baby however they like.

#50 Pilar Palabundar

Posted 11 January 2017 - 06:51 PM

View PostBlueSheep, on 11 January 2017 - 04:09 PM, said:

I've personally made complaints to centre management when once I walked into a parents room to find two men using the room to hold a work conference with zero children in there. They took both cucible chairs and had their laptop and papers out. I didn't feel safe or comfortable feeding there.

I see your two guys using cubicle chairs and raise you a couple (sans child) walking out of a feeding cubicle in a busy Brisbane city parents room a couple of days before xmas.  Really, what the hell.

And then a complete douche canoe making two sets of parents wait at the Qantas club parents room as well before our flight home. Again sans child.

Talk about the silly season.

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