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Breastfeeding advice in the Parents Room....


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55 replies to this topic

#1 superhotd

Posted 11 January 2017 - 12:24 PM

Hi Guys,

Please dont flame me for this post but I would like your opinion/advice.

I don't really care if you bottle feed or breastfeed your baby as long as your baby is fed & thriving.

Perhaps I am being over sensitive as I am only new to this game...

I had no choice but to breastfeed on the floor (no available seats) whilst both cubicles were taken up with bottle feeding Mums. Is it first in first serve or do breastfeeding Mammas get preference? I don't mind getting my boobs out as a parents room is a parents room etc.

It is a hard one.

#2 Paddlepop

Posted 11 January 2017 - 12:26 PM

First in, first served.

#3 Brutta Borgia

Posted 11 January 2017 - 12:28 PM

It is a hard one.

It goes to show how woeful facilities are doesn't it - it's the pits really.


#4 seayork2002

Posted 11 January 2017 - 12:31 PM

View PostPaddlepop, on 11 January 2017 - 12:26 PM, said:

First in, first served.

This but if I was in there doing whatever it is I was doing and I heard a 'excuse me do you mind if I could sit here' or whatever I would help.

I am presuming the people in there were not psychic? did you ask?

same as needing a seat on a bus, someone to hold a door for me etc.

If you asking in general then yes I presume it is first come first served.

#5 MrsGrinchyWanderer

Posted 11 January 2017 - 12:32 PM

First come first served. How do you even know what method someone is feeding their baby with behind the curtain?

#6 amdirel

Posted 11 January 2017 - 12:34 PM

First in first served.
Some people like the cubicles not just for privacy, but also to have a quiet non-distracting environment for their baby to feed.

#7 born.a.girl

Posted 11 January 2017 - 12:35 PM

First in, best dressed.


Plenty of bottle fed babies can take an eternity to feed if they are surrounded by enough distractions.

Perhaps the parents also wish to avoid chit chat - perhaps they're anxious, or have PND or have been subject to comments about 'breast is best'.

Who knows?  Either way, feeding method, to me, is irrelevant in terms of entitlement to the privacy.

I fully appreciate those new to breast feeding may crave a little more privacy than they might get in that situation, but that's not the fault of the two already there.

Edited by born.a.girl, 11 January 2017 - 12:36 PM.


#8 Brutta Borgia

Posted 11 January 2017 - 12:35 PM

Maybe they didn't have the curtains drawn?

#9 MrsGrinchyWanderer

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:14 PM

View PostLucrezia Borgia, on 11 January 2017 - 12:35 PM, said:

Maybe they didn't have the curtains drawn?

If the OP knew that the people in the cubibles were bottle feeding, then it's first come first served for a chair then. Did she expect one of the people who were already there  and part way through a bottle to get up for her and sit on the floor themselves?

#10 lazycritterisferal

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:15 PM

First in best dressed. However I didn't use the feeding cubicles either way.

Not all parent's rooms have them anyway.

They are after all a courtesy by shopping centres and really to help to get people out of their home and into a shopping centre spending money.

Cynical.
Yes.
😋

Edited by lazycritterisferal, 11 January 2017 - 01:16 PM.


#11 José

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:16 PM

If a parent enters the parents room and its empty i would say they get to choose where they set up to feed.
Then i think it may not be easy to relocate if another parent wanted the space they were using. As in bub may be hard to settle into feeding again, might have lots of bags and bub to juggle etc.

So, i think first in best dressed


#12 ekbaby

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:21 PM

Sitting on the floor to feed your baby is no fun! Can you breastfeed your baby in another part of the shopping centre i.e. not the parents room? Eg sometimes there will be cafes with quiet booths, if you are still getting used to breastfeeding in public this can be a good start. Also lots of supermarkets etc have seats outside of them where you can sit. You are legally allowed to breastfeed anywhere that you are allowed to be with your baby. I know getting confidence up can be hard but as time goes on when you go out to different places not all places will have a parents room so it can be good to practice feeding in some different places. Most people won't be looking or care, and the older your baby gets the easier all the attachment stuff is likely to get (in terms of getting them on quickly and easily)

#13 Starletta

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:21 PM

First in best dressed. It's definitely not any easier to bottle feed standing up then it is to breastfeed standing up?

Why is it a hard one? Why would breastfeeders get preference?

#14 Brutta Borgia

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:24 PM

View PostMrsGrinchyWanderer, on 11 January 2017 - 01:14 PM, said:

If the OP knew that the people in the cubibles were bottle feeding, then it's first come first served for a chair then. Did she expect one of the people who were already there  and part way through a bottle to get up for her and sit on the floor themselves?

I don't know what the OP may have expected. maybe she did think that someone who was almost at the end of the feed might stand up for her so she could sit down and establish a latch on - who knows? I was just responding to a poster who asked how she knew they were bottle feeding - I just surmised that perhaps it was plainly obvious - if the curtains were drawn. that's all.

#15 fancie shmancie

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:26 PM

OP, were any chairs provided in the parents room excluding the chairs in the cubicles?

Sounds like more chairs are required.

Edited by fancie shmancie, 11 January 2017 - 01:29 PM.


#16 Silly Old Elf

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:29 PM

First in for sure. I would never expect someone feeding their baby, bottle or breast, to move for me. Should a bottle feeding mum sit on the floor over a breast feeding mum?
Personally, I would rather sit on a seat in the centre, or at a coffee shop than on the floor or a parents room.
And yes, your experience highlights a problem with the centre's facilities.

#17 JBH

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:32 PM

Generally first in best dressed.  That said, when my babies were a bit older, if I happened to use a parents' room I would have stood for someone with a tiny baby.

Edit: nothing to do with breast or bottle, just because I remember how it was to be a nervous parent of a really little baby, needing everything for feeding to be just so.

Edited by JBH, 11 January 2017 - 01:33 PM.


#18 EmmDasher

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:34 PM

First in best dressed. If I had to feed in the parents room then I'd feed standing up before I sat on the floor. Sitting on the floor wouldn't even occur to me.

ETA - I'd give priority to new mum's and tiny babies too.

Edited by EmmDasher, 11 January 2017 - 01:35 PM.


#19 CallMeFeral

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:35 PM

View PostStarletta, on 11 January 2017 - 01:21 PM, said:

Why is it a hard one? Why would breastfeeders get preference?

I'm presuming the OP is of the 'breasts are private' school of thought, and therefore feels that she has to go somewhere private to feed, whereas based solely on the privacy issue bottle feeding mums could go anywhere. Is that what it is, OP?

Not suggesting I agree, just that it's the only reason I can think of why one could get preference over the other.

Personally I think the more people popping out a feeding boob in other areas of the world, the better - on the social side it helps normalise it - on the personal side it makes it a lot easier to feed if you are comfortable in a cafe rather than sitting on the floor of a baby poo smelling parents room.

#20 JustBeige

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:35 PM

(FF bubs). I only used the rooms once or twice tbh. Ours always smelt like poo and after having babies my gag reflex changed to super sensitive.

The first time, I tried using just a couch but between DD watching everything else and her feed taking twice as long and being abused for feeding my child 'liquid cocaine'... the next time I ventured in, i sat in a cubicle and pulled the curtains. lol. didnt stop the poo smell though.

After that they got fed in a cafe and mostly still in their stroller.

#21 Ellie bean

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:35 PM

View PostLucrezia Borgia, on 11 January 2017 - 12:35 PM, said:

Maybe they didn't have the curtains drawn?
If someone is BF their baby with the curtains open can I ask them to move so I can draw the curtains and bottle feed my baby in privacy?
First come first served is the only fair rule

#22 Brutta Borgia

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:38 PM

I agree CMF - sometimes you just don't think of all possible scenarios, reasons etc for something - you might be breastfeeding, see a parents room with a cubicle with a curtain and you automatically think: that's for privacy, because society has a problem (wrongly) with seeing breasts. and you don't think of any other possible scenarios - ie, a bottle fed baby might get distracted so the curtains are necessary in that situation too. The OP was just asking a question. now she knows.

#23 Brutta Borgia

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:40 PM

View PostEllie bean, on 11 January 2017 - 01:35 PM, said:

If someone is BF their baby with the curtains open can I ask them to move so I can draw the curtains and bottle feed my baby in privacy?
First come first served is the only fair rule

Ellie Bean you can do whatever you want.

A poster asked the question how the OP knew they were bottle feeding. I put forward a possible explanation: the curtains were drawn - therefore it was clearly obviously they were bottle feeding. that's all.

#24 Ellie bean

Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:59 PM

View PostLucrezia Borgia, on 11 January 2017 - 01:40 PM, said:



Ellie Bean you can do whatever you want.

A poster asked the question how the OP knew they were bottle feeding. I put forward a possible explanation: the curtains were drawn - therefore it was clearly obviously they were bottle feeding. that's all.
Sorry, misunderstood

#25 born.a.girl

Posted 11 January 2017 - 02:03 PM

View PostJBH, on 11 January 2017 - 01:32 PM, said:

Generally first in best dressed.  That said, when my babies were a bit older, if I happened to use a parents' room I would have stood for someone with a tiny baby.

Edit: nothing to do with breast or bottle, just because I remember how it was to be a nervous parent of a really little baby, needing everything for feeding to be just so.


This I agree with.

If I'd been feeding a much older baby, either way,  and saw someone with a newborn come in I would hope I'd have offered to move for them.




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