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WHY does it still happen ?


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#1 argo1967

Posted 09 December 2015 - 08:33 AM

Hi

I am just gob smacked that bullying still happens - its a problem that parents & schools should continue to strive to squash. Cause it means a change in the worlds mentality doesn't it.

It is a lot better than it use to be ... I guess, but am not convinced. And to be honest its a minority but is disturbing how a mob mentality can easily form. Why do some feel better about themselves by hurting others?

Number one - parents parents parents need to spend time talking about diversity and I don't just mean race & religion - I mean everybody has something positive to bring.

And schools - schools are just such incredible institutions and deserve all the funding they need and pay the teachers and support staff more - this is where the world can change in addition to parents and home.

I started this conversation because yet again  my son who has eczema and because his skin got really bad recently got called 'red bull' by some boys in year 7 - diversity comes in many shapes and forms not just the typical mainstream of race & religion!

Have a great Christmas & Safe and Happy New Year!

#2 Chicken Pie

Posted 10 December 2015 - 10:40 AM

yep scary and sad isn't it. my dd suffered badly at the hands of a bully and she is only 6 - the effects were traumatic to all of us for a long time.

sad part is sometimes the parents of the bullies seem to not care? or encourage it? or something mind boggling

#3 Rapscallion Cat

Posted 10 December 2015 - 10:49 AM

Bullying is such a complex issue.  You cannot broadly deal with it as each case is unique.  And this is why schools ultimately fail at rectifying it.  They are used to dishing out set curriculum in a pass/fail environment.  I don't know what the answer is but contrary to popular opinion I don't believe the bully ever suffers more than the victim.

Sorry about your son OP.  Give him an extra hug tonight from an internet random :)

#4 lurfest

Posted 10 December 2015 - 10:51 AM

Oh no, your poor son. I have psoriasis and rosacea.  Made for some 'fun' times as a child!

#5 aquarium2

Posted 10 December 2015 - 12:00 PM

I hope this comes across constructively and I understand name calling can be very upsetting - esp from older children to younger.

I don't think it's realistic to expect name calling to be removed from human behaviour - adults esp amongst men do it all the time as humour.

I think kids try to replicate this sarcastic type of humor but don't have the maturity to handle it in such a way that it's taken as funny and not hurtful.

However I do think name calling is different to bullying.

#6 lurfest

Posted 10 December 2015 - 12:10 PM

View Postaquarium2, on 10 December 2015 - 12:00 PM, said:

I hope this comes across constructively and I understand name calling can be very upsetting - esp from older children to younger.

I don't think it's realistic to expect name calling to be removed from human behaviour - adults esp amongst men do it all the time as humour.

I think kids try to replicate this sarcastic type of humor but don't have the maturity to handle it in such a way that it's taken as funny and not hurtful.

However I do think name calling is different to bullying.

It really isn't sarcastic humour to be called 'Rudolph' from ages 10 to 13.  Truly, it isn't.  

I can't imagine grown men enjoy being made fun of, either.  There is a vast difference between 'Davo' and 'Passion fingers' (everything you touch, you ****).

#7 Olive-pip

Posted 10 December 2015 - 12:18 PM

Words are very powerful and can be very loaded, so name calling is often a strong part of bullying. I don't even want to provide the examples.
ETA: Adults are just as much hurt by name calling.

Edited by Olive-pip, 10 December 2015 - 12:19 PM.


#8 Rapscallion Cat

Posted 10 December 2015 - 04:07 PM

View Postaquarium2, on 10 December 2015 - 12:00 PM, said:

I hope this comes across constructively and I understand name calling can be very upsetting - esp from older children to younger.

I don't think it's realistic to expect name calling to be removed from human behaviour - adults esp amongst men do it all the time as humour.

I think kids try to replicate this sarcastic type of humor but don't have the maturity to handle it in such a way that it's taken as funny and not hurtful.

However I do think name calling is different to bullying.

Sorry but there is nothing constructive about your response at all.  You are basically telling this mum that her son should suck it up because the kids were trying to be sarcastic and that is wrong.

#9 Trevor Trove

Posted 10 December 2015 - 04:15 PM

Quote

diversity comes in many shapes and forms not just the typical mainstream of race & religion!


How true!



#10 Dark unicorn

Posted 21 May 2017 - 02:45 PM

The thing is... I work in a pretty liberal forward thinking environment. All of my colleagues abhor any form of bullying. Yet, on many occasions (MANY) I have witnessed them doing the things that they profess to be above. The are bullies, but don't even realise it.

So if adults, who consider themselves anti-bullying, are still capable of doing it - what hope do children have? All we can do is the best we can. But unfortunately I don't think it will ever stop.




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