Jump to content

Very scared

  • Please log in to reply
80 replies to this topic

#26 Villanofoz

Posted 07 November 2015 - 06:21 AM

Congratulations - being a mum is awesome and 26 isn't that young to be a dad so, it sounds like he's definitely coming round to it. Some tips from me - re flat hunting - you only need a one bed for the first couple of years, the baby will probably be in with you for all of the first 12 months, you can stretch it out to two of you need, or look for somewhere you can have a baby area - my friends daughter slept in her walk in wardrobe until she was three. You want a ground floor unit or one with a lift. You don't need loads of expensive stuff. Gumtree, eBay, op shops, friends and family will all help. I second the baby shower idea, people will want to buy you presents. Don't feel like you now need a big car - my son is transported in a $3000 Ford Focus, I took it to the garage before he was born to get it revamped a bit and it goes brilliantly. Also will you even need a car? I have friends who manage without. It's all very doable on a budget and even though you only work casually there s a good chance you ll still be eligible for paid parental leave. Congratulations again!!!

#27 Psyduck

Posted 07 November 2015 - 06:44 AM

Congratulations! I wasn't much older than you when i had my DS! (I have literally just finished a qualification in MH too!!)

I bought a great pram from my local By sell trade page it looked like it hard hardly been used. I paid $200 and they retail for $750!

I also bought a cot recently to use as a bed for my dog and it was only $30 and i felt guilty using it for my dog as it was a very expensive brand in amazing condition.

There are also great deals on hardly used clothes on buy sell trade pages.

A i agree with other posters, baby shower is a great idea.

#28 Silverstreak

Posted 07 November 2015 - 07:17 AM

I just wanted to wish you congratulations OP! It sounds like you guys are going to be just fine. My DH finished his studies just before DS was born and he was 36! So you guys are doing better than us!

Yep, definitely look on the Centrelink website. You should get family tax benefit and maybe even parenting payment, depending on income. There is also the newborn upfront payment and newborn supplement.

Baby clothes aren't that expensive, unless you're buying fancy brands. DS mostly wore target cotton suits with the enclosed feet. I used to buy the sets of three suits on the one clothes hanger when they were on special and he always looked nice.

I am guessing you will be having a winter baby like I did. So I just layered a lot: cotton singlet or short onesie, then a cotton suit over the top and a little knitted cardigan on the top of that. Socks over the onesie feet if it was cold and a little cotton or knitted hat. So cute! Polar fleece blanket when out in the pram.

Check out Ebay, Gumtree, your local buy and swap Facebook page and your local op shops, you can find some nice things. Also your local market stalls can have nice knitted tops and hats for babies at really good prices.

Once you start telling friends and relatives about your baby, you may be surprised at all the stuff you will get! I had a friend's mum knit me a baby blanket for DS and another friend give me their car seat, that could be used for another four years! We were also given my SIL's pram and portacot. People love making and buying stuff for babies (and clearing out their own closets!)

#29 Taradiddle

Posted 07 November 2015 - 07:53 AM

I just wanted to point out that since I had my kids, I have noticed how there now seem to be cheap, safe versions of pretty much everything for babies - they don't need to be expensive.  

Kmart, Big W, Target - you could do lay buys with them of the big items and pay them off slowly so you will be fully set up by the time the baby arrives.

And prams / strollers can be got off gumtree second hand, just need to keep your eyes out for something good and jump on it when it pops up.

#30 Bravelove

Posted 08 November 2015 - 04:50 AM

Al of you have such great ideas ! You have no idea how much this is helping to calm me and I really feel like we're all gonna be okay !

The other day I made a list of all the things you guys Have mentioned and more , then I went to the local shops and checked out prices on diapers, bottles , clothes , food, cots , blankets, literally anything I could think off and wrote it all down. I compared all the prices to different shops and found the ones that sell the items I'll need at the cheapest price. ...it's a lot of stuff but it's do able, if we're smart.

You guys have such a wonderful advice if I hadn't found this forum I'd be lost !  Also I think I will have a baby shower.  just to make my life easier hahaha xxx

Thank you all !

#31 Charli73

Posted 08 November 2015 - 05:55 AM

Congrats on your pregnancy, I've just read all the replies your going to be fine!

As others have said if you can find a local FB page but swap sell baby one for your area they are filled with mums trying to sell or even give away baby clothes, I k ow because it took me ages to get rid of mine!

I see so many items go for great prices considering how much they cost brand new..

All the best!

#32 SplashingRainbows

Posted 08 November 2015 - 06:04 AM

If you're having a baby shower my advice would be not to purchase for yourself anything under $100 until after the shower unless it's a really great deal (50% off). Save your money so it's there at the end in a separate account.

Much easier to buy the things you're not given than run around trying to return things. And I have found everyone loves a first baby and absolutely loves to buy things for you.

#33 Gateaugirl

Posted 08 November 2015 - 06:18 PM

If I were you I'd ask my mum/siblings/cousins/anyone if they know people who've had babies recently and have gear to get rid of. You could get great stuff and not pay a cent.

#34 Wide Eyes

Posted 09 November 2015 - 04:41 PM

Congratulations, BraveLove! I bet you will be an amazing mum :)

I am a little older than you but I also fell pregnant while on birth control (I am currently 31 weeks pregnant!) I was also terrified at first and all those questions ran through my mind as well - how are we going to cope financially and emotionally with a BABY?!

Things have a way of falling into place if you allow! My partner and I have saved so much money by buying secondhand items! We also have been given so much stuff for free by people we know. There are loads of 'Buy Swap Sell' groups on Facebook where people are always getting rid of baby stuff, too!

And remember, what babies need most of all is love. And I have no doubt in my mind that you will be able to provide your baby with that.

You will be FINE. In fact, you will be great!

#35 ~Peachy keen~

Posted 16 November 2015 - 05:56 PM

Just be brave love! ;)  (Sounds like you are anyway).

Hang around these forums and you'll learn A LOT! I was the first of my friends to have a baby & had no idea. I learnt so much here. I didn't contribute much, just read & read & read. (no facebook then!!)
Also maybe try a local facebook group as the mums/to be will hopefully have some local advise too.

as PP said, try not to stress too much, these things have a way of working themselves out. They have to don't they?! Just keep up your work & study. It's the easiest time to do it I think, study that is, when the kids are young.
Good luck with the next big step in your life.

#36 LilMama15

Posted 23 November 2015 - 09:04 AM


Being a first time young mum can be daunting, I was 17 when I had my daughter and I had never been so petrified in my life. I was a little like you, I fell in love with her as soon as I knew she was in my stomach, but I wasn't sure how I was going to manage, how my partner would feel. I contemplated not hating her, but it's just not something I could do, and I'm glad I didn't. She is now three and a half and even though it hasn't been easy, I wouldn't change it for the world. After her first birthday I became a single mother, and up until 4 months ago I have been on my own. But I have now met someone who is amazing with my daughter and at 21 years of age I am 8 weeks pregnant with my second child. It might seem scary right now, and trust me there are always those daunting moments, but its worth it in the end. I wish you the very best of luck. Message if you need someone to chat to, or vent. (:

#37 sueratbag

Posted 06 March 2016 - 06:30 PM

Months later now. How are you going?

#38 Bravelove

Posted 21 March 2016 - 01:27 PM

Months later and everything is going great. We have moved out to our own little house in a new suburb and we are both very happy. My family and my partners family have been so supportive and caring. We've been able to afford most things for baby, my mother bought the pram as a gift so that was so great and helpful. We are both very excited for our little baby girl 💗 to arrive. Things really did turn out okay and for the better actually. This baby really helped my partner and I see how much we care for each other and this was just another thing we wanted too share together. I'm so lucky and I never forget it ever. Money is tight but were by no means struggling.. And if we are smart it should stay that way. XXXX thank you all for your love and advice. You really saved me for a while there xx

#39 Silverstreak

Posted 21 March 2016 - 05:49 PM

Wow, fantastic update, congratulations!

#40 sueratbag

Posted 21 March 2016 - 06:18 PM

Great to hear!

Thank you for reposting. Best wishes to you and your BF and dear little girl.

#41 SummerHaze

Posted 30 May 2016 - 08:27 PM

have you talkd with him on this theme before? if he likes kids then he will not react badly, you must calm down

#42 Bravelove

Posted 11 September 2016 - 04:26 PM

Olivia Eden was born on the 14th of July 2016 at 2:29pm. She was a c section because she was breech but I knew beforehand so the c section was planned. Guys thankyou! For all the support! OllieBug is beautiful amazing magic ! Our lives are filled with joy and laughter everyday with this amazing human we made together. We've come so far. Everything is beautiful and perfect. I transitioned to being a mother incredibly easy ! I love her so completely. Both our families have joined and love each other because of this one little baby. I have a great support system. I have a group of young mothers who I see weekly and my partner and I are so strong . We are an amazing team. I thought I'd give an update because this thread saved me and my daughter there for a while. I can't imagine my life without her ! She sleeps wonderfully. Full 6 hours at night. She's formula fed because she has a terrible lip tie that was fixed but she refused the breast after that. I don't really mind because she is happy and healthy and has a full belly. She is smiling and giggling and honestly it lights up my life ! THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT !

#43 Lou-bags

Posted 11 September 2016 - 04:28 PM

Such a beautiful update! Brought a little tear to my 38+ week pregnant lady eyes!

Thanks for coming back to update.

#44 TheFirstNoel

Posted 11 September 2016 - 04:33 PM

Awww lovely! Congratulations! You've totally got this, enjoy it!

I remember being 20 and bringing my baby girl home... *sniff sniff*

#45 born.a.girl

Posted 11 September 2016 - 05:56 PM

Lovely update, thankyou.  :)

#46 twin2

Posted 11 September 2016 - 06:38 PM

Thank you for the update I have thought about you often over the last few months and am glad things are going well

#47 just roses

Posted 11 September 2016 - 06:47 PM

Such a great update, OP! So glad things are working out so well xx

#48 Abcde-La-A

Posted 11 September 2016 - 06:59 PM

What a lovely update. Congratulations on your precious daughter.

#49 Yetski

Posted 11 September 2016 - 07:12 PM

How beautiful!!! Much love to you and your little family xoxoxo

#50 Hopefully helpful

Posted 11 September 2016 - 07:16 PM

Congratulations and what a lovely update. You deserve every happiness, long may your joy continue. X

0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users


'My parenting style is Survivalist'

A helicopter or tiger mum, I am not.

8 mums reveal their favourite nappy bags

We asked a bunch of mums which nappy bags they love the most.

Why you shouldn't bother throwing a big first birthday party

If you're feeling the pressure to host an all-out, over-the-top shindig for your baby's birthday, I hereby grant you permission to throw the rules out the window.

The 24 baby names on the verge of extinction this year

If you're on the hunt for the perfect baby name and don't want a chart-topper like Oliver or Olivia, then do we have the list for you.

'My mum doesn't seem that interested in my baby'

Q: My mother and I have always been close, but now that I have a baby, she has not helped out as much as I thought she would.

New guidelines: "Bottle-feeding mums need support too"

Breast is best, but mums who can't, or choose not to breastfeed need support too.

Dads also struggle to 'have it all', study finds

Men and women both experience work-family conflict.

Language development may start in the womb

Study found babies can recognise foreign languages before birth.

Meet the baby born from an embryo frozen for 24 years

Experts say little Emma is a record breaking baby.


Top 5 Articles


From our network

Five things you need to know about flu and pregnancy

As the 2017 flu season begins in earnest, here?s what you need to know to protect yourself and baby.

Mum tips to keep your pre-baby budget in check

Money might be funny in a rich man's world (or so ABBA told us), but for the rest of us it's a major consideration – particularly before having a baby.

5 easy ways to make your maternity leave last longer

Maternity leave is a special time for you, your partner and your new little bundle. The last thing you want is for financial worries to stand in the way of that joy.

10 ways to keep your 'buying for baby' costs down

Becoming a parent is full of surprises – not least of all finding out that, for such small beings, babies cause a lot of chaos and expense.

5 ways to prepare to go from two incomes to one

Here are some ideas for getting that budget in shape, ready for being a one income family.


Baby Names

Need some ideas?

See what names are trending this year.

Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.