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Cafe owner tells mother breastfeeding 'offensive'


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126 replies to this topic

#1 Ranunculus

Posted 26 February 2013 - 06:54 AM

And so it continues..

What is the offensive part of breastfeeding? I don't get it?  huh.gif

#2 daturah

Posted 26 February 2013 - 06:59 AM

Ugh, I'm over hearing about it.  Peeps, just breastfeed. If anyone has a problem with it, do what the lady in the article did. I am tired of getting my knickers in a knot about it.

#3 FeralFemboside

Posted 26 February 2013 - 07:01 AM

That such bs can happen in Newtown, which is chock full of lefties AND parents with young kids tells me that publicising this stuff is important.

I lived in that area for 10 years, I suspect the owners won't know what hit them! Here's their Facebook page.

#4 Sweet like a lemon

Posted 26 February 2013 - 07:08 AM

What part of boobs is offensive? Oh yes, the nipple. The part people don't see when you're breastfeeding. I'm over the whole shame of female bodies. The "Too Rude" stars covering the nipple in wardrobe malfunctions but not the breast. The media frenzy around wardrobe malfunctions and topless females and most definitely over women being told feeding is offensive. 50% of the population either have boobs or are going to get boobs - get over it or start treating men the same.
Had she been wearing a push me up and out cleavage enhancer with a low cut dress I wonder how many complaints would have been made.



#5 axiomae

Posted 26 February 2013 - 07:18 AM

Love the responses on their Facebook page. Wonderful! Keep at it!

#6 Escapin

Posted 26 February 2013 - 07:25 AM

As a local who goes there, I've got to say, I'm pretty shocked. Sattelite is very pro gay/lesbian/transgender/alternative anything really! It's pretty out there.

I'd love to join you for the feed-in today but I only just weened DD last week! At 22 months original.gif And she is the size of a 3yo for max impact...

#7 B.feral3

Posted 26 February 2013 - 07:32 AM

If the owner needed to respond to a complaint, he should have done so by telling the complainant to pull their head in.

#8 glasnost

Posted 26 February 2013 - 07:37 AM

I am from Sydney and same as PPs, Newtown would be the last place I would imagine something like this happening. On paper it would be one of the most "liberated" suburbs in Australia.

I wish I was there to cheer this women on. If the owner has been quoted correctly, she is a complete nutter. An "offence to humanity"? Oh the irony.

#9 HeroOfCanton

Posted 26 February 2013 - 07:48 AM

QUOTE (daturah @ 26/02/2013, 07:59 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Ugh, I'm over hearing about it.  Peeps, just breastfeed. If anyone has a problem with it, do what the lady in the article did. I am tired of getting my knickers in a knot about it.

Yeah? What happens when I'm 'over' hearing about human rights abuses, or neglected children?
Let's all just get over it all I suppose.

and this:
"We at Satellite are not mother-haters nor children-haters, however, when complaints are received on any matter, we do have a duty to act on them,"
from the cafe is crap.
If they have a complaint about someone doing something perfectly natural AND LEGAL, they should tell the complainer to leave.

#10 FeralFemboside

Posted 26 February 2013 - 07:54 AM

QUOTE (Escapin @ 26/02/2013, 08:25 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
As a local who goes there, I've got to say, I'm pretty shocked. Sattelite is very pro gay/lesbian/transgender/alternative anything really! It's pretty out there.

I'd love to join you for the feed-in today but I only just weened DD last week! At 22 months original.gif And she is the size of a 3yo for max impact...


I'm saying this as a lesbian (so it angers me on all sorts of levels) but it would not surprise me if an element of anti-heteronormativity endgendered the complaint in the first place. There's no shortage of hostility about the fact that Newtown is now full of "breeders". (I hate that word, but it is the one that gets thrown around so I'm using it here.)

#11 SnazzyFeral

Posted 26 February 2013 - 08:04 AM

The thing that got me was the way they apologised and then "liked" all the anti-breastfeeding comments under that apology and tried to blame it on facebook. It was a woman that called breastfeeding and offence against humanity BTW.

#12 Purelle

Posted 26 February 2013 - 08:04 AM

I couldn't help myself I commented. What a disgrace sad.gif

#13 chookpea

Posted 26 February 2013 - 08:05 AM

In Newtown of all places!  Was very surprised to read this.  All good there will be a boycott, but once this blows over after a week or two, it will be business as usual for them unfortunately.
Never been there before and don't plan to go there at all now

#14 Eirinn

Posted 26 February 2013 - 08:12 AM

QUOTE (SnazzySass @ 26/02/2013, 09:04 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The thing that got me was the way they apologised and then "liked" all the anti-breastfeeding comments under that apology and tried to blame it on facebook. It was a woman that called breastfeeding and offence against humanity BTW.


Yep, and the staff have been telling their customers that "offence against humanity" is a misquote. I know the mother in question and it is not a misquote at all.

Not a very sincere apology if they then go and undermine her like that.

#15 Cat People

Posted 26 February 2013 - 08:22 AM

I wonder if there really was a complaint.  And then the gutless person didn't own up when she asked the other people in the cafe if they were offended.





QUOTE (daturah @ 26/02/2013, 07:59 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Ugh, I'm over hearing about it.  Peeps, just breastfeed. If anyone has a problem with it, do what the lady in the article did. I am tired of getting my knickers in a knot about it.


I'm over hearing this sort of response.  The title of the thread was obvious.  Don't open it if you're "over" it.


#16 julz78

Posted 26 February 2013 - 08:31 AM

Obviously the owner is not sorry at all, she is sorry about all the bad attention it is bringing her and her cafe. Part of me would like to go there and get the boobs out feeding my 2 year old then let her run amok in the cafe but I wouldn't waste my time or money. Its ridiculous this happened did she not see the huge fuss about the woman who was breastfeeding at the pools? I think there needs to be some sort of fine or other deterrant for businesses who discriminate against breastfeeding women like this.

#17 Orangedrops

Posted 26 February 2013 - 08:32 AM

Eirinn, you know Regan? I wonder if I know you. Small world.

#18 adl

Posted 26 February 2013 - 08:43 AM

I live in the area and also am shocked,  its a very tolerant place or used to be.... well thats just another business we wont go to...
  

vote with your feet and $$$ ....

I overheard my local cafe owner tell an older woman who was complaining/ commenting  about all the prams and babies, that is was the lcoal mothers group that meet regularly etc... yes and pay for said owner to ski in Japan each year etc,  she definitely realises where her bread is buttered....



#19 Froger

Posted 26 February 2013 - 08:45 AM

QUOTE (Femboside @ 26/02/2013, 07:54 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm saying this as a lesbian (so it angers me on all sorts of levels) but it would not surprise me if an element of anti-heteronormativity endgendered the complaint in the first place. There's no shortage of hostility about the fact that Newtown is now full of "breeders". (I hate that word, but it is the one that gets thrown around so I'm using it here.)

I haven't been to Newtown for over 10 years (so I have no recent experience to go on), but based on my experiences there back then, this is the first thing that crossed my mind when I found out where this incident happened.

Edited by SarahM72, 26 February 2013 - 08:48 AM.


#20 Kay1

Posted 26 February 2013 - 08:56 AM

This used to be my favourite cafe back when we lived in the area pre kids. It seems to have changed owners since then but I am still outraged that this could happen. It really saddens me to think of the possibility that it is an 'anti heterosexual' sentiment being expressed.... on so many levels that I hardly know where to start. sad.gif The irony is also astounding. There can surely be little more 'human' than a breastfeeding baby and mother.

I read this just yesterday and thought it was pretty insightful although it starts out a bit slow.

Breastfeeding blog post.




#21 RealityBites

Posted 26 February 2013 - 09:04 AM

Ugh. Just ugh. So frustrating.

#22 Sentient Puddle

Posted 26 February 2013 - 09:07 AM

QUOTE
This used to be my favourite cafe back when we lived in the area pre kids. It seems to have changed owners since then but I am still outraged that this could happen. It really saddens me to think of the possibility that it is an 'anti heterosexual' sentiment being expressed.... on so many levels that I hardly know where to start.  The irony is also astounding. There can surely be little more 'human' than a breastfeeding baby and mother.

I read this just yesterday and thought it was pretty insightful although it starts out a bit slow.

Breastfeeding blog post.

Loved that blog post!

#23 Froger

Posted 26 February 2013 - 09:10 AM

Kay1 - that blog post was very good, and reflects my own thoughts on the matter. It does make sense as to why people generally find breastfeeding in public so unacceptable.

Edited by SarahM72, 26 February 2013 - 09:18 AM.


#24 FeralFemboside

Posted 26 February 2013 - 09:15 AM

That blog post was super, especially the conclusion:

QUOTE
I have been wondering for days now what “discreet” even means in the context of public breastfeeding. I now realise that what it  means is that the woman in question must show through her body language  that she knows that she is in breach of the rules of the public sphere. The  specific position of her body, or her cover, is not really the issue. The issue  is the body language of apology (I think the code word being used is modesty). She needs to show that she is sorry for taking up public space with her private activity. Then it would be OK. Then she could be excused.  

  Being proud or even nonplussed about breastfeeding our babies is an issue, not because we are being public exhibitionists, but because we are (even if we didn’t realise it) openly challenging the rules of the public sphere. We are being unapologetically, overtly female it what is still, essentially, a male space. That is what is so offensive – the brazen transgression of these long-standing, unwritten rules.  
  
[As a final aside, it has also dawned on me that this is probably also at the heart of the ‘debate’ over whether small children should be allowed to be children in cafés, restaurants, etc… and why so-called “mommy blogging” is the object of such derision.]

Particularly the first paragraph I've quoted. I think the author has hit the nail exactly there.

Edited by Femboside, 26 February 2013 - 09:17 AM.


#25 BetteBoop

Posted 26 February 2013 - 09:27 AM

QUOTE (Femboside @ 26/02/2013, 09:15 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
That blog post was super, especially the conclusion:


Particularly the first paragraph I've quoted. I think the author has hit the nail exactly there.


I agree with every word of it. No one ever tells men how that they need to behave modestly in public spaces. Not ever.

They own public spaces so they can do as they like in them.

I went to Westfield on the weekend and saw 2 shirtless men and I was only there for a brief period of time. Why aren't people outraged at that? Taking your shirt off in a public space is something that might offend elderly people.

I can guarantee no one approached this blokes and said they were being offensive.

I'm sick to death of this issue too. You would honestly think women have only just invented breastfeeding this century and that their primary goal is not feeding their baby but flashing their tits.

Cos so many women are just desperate for any reason to show their tits in public right?




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