Jump to content
kindergartener being violent
4 replies to this topic
Posted 22 February 2013 - 08:52 PM
Why would a little 5 yo boy suddenly start showing aggression to classmates and peers and how do I respond to it?
It is in the form of kicking and punching and seems unprovoked and random. He seems to find it amusing and despite warnings and threats it continues. We have talked about keeping hands to ourselves and gone through the empathetic reasoning but to no avail. He has been at big school 3 weeks and is beginning to become known for all the wrong reasons.
How should I manage it? What to do from here?
Posted 23 February 2013 - 11:48 AM
I'm sure this is very stressful for you!
The first thing I'd be doing is sitting down with your son's teacher, as cinnabubble suggested, and seeing if he/she has any insights and suggestions. I imagine that most experienced teachers of young children have seen behavior like this from some kids.
Does your son have a "currency?" I took a quick check of your post history & it sounds like he's a dinosaur fan. Perhaps you can put together some VERY simple behavioral guidelines (with him & his teacher), like 3-4 core, easy to understand goals. Reward with dinosaur stickers for every period of school that he follows the rules. Reinforce with a small treat (doesn't have to be food or a toy -- could be time together in the pool, or computer time, etc.) either at the day if he reaches a certain level. Both you & the teacher should try to "catch him being good" and praise him for THAT behavior regularly.
On a different note, have you ever consulted with a good developmental paediatrician or child psych? I ask because it seems you've voiced concerns in the past about defiant/unmanageable behavior -- I appreciate that it's so hard to tell what's normal "bad" behavior in a 3, 4, 5 year old -- but at the same time, it would be a shame for your son to get a reputation for all the wrong reasons if there are actually underlying causes for his behavior. I offer this with my "ADHD Mum" hat on.
I have found that schools & teachers can be very collaborative when they feel as if the parents are aware of/concerned about their child's poor behavior and have an open mind about the possibility of other issues (rather than just saying "Oh, boys will be boys" or "The teacher should know how to address this.")
Good luck sorting everything out. I hope your son settles in well soon.
Posted 23 February 2013 - 01:35 PM
BMJ is right on this one (as she usually is). I've seen similar behaviour end up with a diagnosis which really improved things for the child and their family. Not saying that this is your little boy's issue but that you should work with your child's teacher to work out what is happening before it gets any worse.
Posted 23 February 2013 - 01:53 PM
Have there been any repercussions for his violence? Warnings and threats only work if they are followed through.
As there are no obvious triggers, I would look at either a medical condition (including psych), or if there needs to be a change in parenting techniques.
1 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users
To celebrate Essential Baby reaching half a million Facebook fans, we have a Mountain Buggy Swift to giveaway to a lucky fan.
You're out shopping with your little one and they're incessantly whining that they want a treat. It's easy to say no ... the first time, at least.
A jacket similar to the one found with the remains of a brutally murdered little girl in South Australia has been identified on eBay.
Shelley Parker had to keep driving buses until the date her baby was due and will have to rush back to work at the end of this week after being denied paid parental leave on a "technicality".
It has to be the most original way ever of promoting a children's book donation day.
Some parents who conceived through a sperm donor will be wary of telling the child, while others prefer to deal with it early on. But recent research suggests it makes little difference either way.
We've probably all seen a passed-out bridesmaid at one wedding or another, but it usually happens towards the end of the night.
Pregnant TV meteorologist Katie Fehlinger has hit back at haters who called her a "sausage in casing".
I didn't want to say anything negative to my pregnant friend, but I wish I'd been more honest.
Harper had seen rain from the comfort of indoors before, but had never had the pleasure of being outside and experiencing it first hand.
Many people suppose that it must be much more tiring to have a baby in middle age, but all the mothers in the playground look exhausted, whatever their age.
An American reality TV star has been busted with a cheating website account, according to US media.
A little girl is more alert and starting to talk after being hit by a car a week ago, but still faces a long recovery.
Q: My almost-3-year-old is starting to figure out that he can lie when asked if he ripped the book, threw the food, hit his brother, etc. Totally normal, I know. How do we respond?
A mum-to-be experiences the frustration of dealing with Centrelink, myGov and everything in between.
Singer Kelly Clarkson has announced she is pregnant with her second child during a concert in Los Angeles.
At least three sites are republishing Ashley Madison's user data on the public-facing internet.
There are a fair few ways to distract yourself and beat pains while in labour, but it's probably a rare woman who chooses her dance her way through it.
Baby Jacob, whose photo of him born at just 27 weeks was deemed 'too graphic' for a fundraising site, has died.
Niall Pilkington's death last summer apparently raised little alarm in Bellefontaine, Ohio. Tragic accidents happen, after all.
When a group of researchers studied nearly 3500 mothers and their babies, they noticed a curious pattern.
Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.
Top 5 Articles
Thirty seconds was all it took to turn a shopping trip into my worst nightmare.
George has overtaken William in the official rankings of most popular British baby names - and Game of Thrones is still having an impact on parents.
What's more important, a baby or a baseball? That's a question this dad seems to struggle with.
It's not often you hear the words labour and luxury in the same sentence but for some, a 5-star start to parenthood is exactly what they seek. And with a number of private hospitals now offering packages which include a post-birth stay at a sumptuous first class resort, many mums are choosing to recover in style.
Most women carry a smidge of baby weight after giving birth. If you're lucky enough to have an older child in the house, they can keep you on track with your weight loss goals.
Is it too soon to be reading to my two-month-old son? If not, what should I read?
Sibling rivalry is an act of competition, but if your children feel involved and special, this type of jealousy will be minimised.
I remember when I was trying to decide if I could combine motherhood and furthering my university education.
To celebrate dads and families, we are giving away a Picos Pack from Pacapod Australia filled with a few extra goodies ENTER NOW
A mother has had a frantic race to the hospital after her daughter was hit by a car, just four weeks after her infant son died.
A six-month-old baby girl is trapped in the Thai capital in a bitter custody wrangle between her Thai surrogate mother and her biological father.
A mother of six has been denied access to IVF treatment in order to have another child over concerns about her parenting skills.
Exhausted parents from around the world are singing the praises of a "miracle" book which promises to put even the most restless child to sleep in just minutes.
Parenthood can make you feel bad, but you're not alone.
The British royal family criticized paparazzi on Friday for what it called their increasingly dangerous attempts to photograph young Prince George.
"Anti-vaxxers" face not being able to send their children to childcare centres or kindergarten if they refuse to have them immunised.
Giving birth in a hospital surrounded by medical experts is tough enough, but some women deliver babies without a clean sheet to lie on.
When their son Jacob was born at just 27 weeks, Christina and Jeff Hinks were thrown into an uncertain world.
Bugaboo sure likes to keep things fresh, and with the Australian spring/summer season coming up, there are two new Bugaboo pram releases.
Mum's room or their own room? Cot or bassinets? Deciding where twins will sleep can be tricky.
Get your free ticket to The Essential Baby & Toddler Show and save $20 - register online now!