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1st birthday or 40th birthday?
Which one would you go to?

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42 replies to this topic

#1 jenchristo

Posted 21 February 2013 - 08:58 PM

We have been invited to 2 birthdays on the same day at the same time. We got the invites the same day.

1st: Have known them for 1 year. See them most weeks (as part of a group). 30 minute drive. Casual party in park. Know many of the other attendees.

40th: Have known them for 10 years. See them every 2 or 3 months. 1 hour drive. Catered party in pub. Don't know many other guests.

Due to the locations, can't really go to both. Would be early for one then late for other.

I can't decide. DH is no help. Which party would you go to?

#2 Charlies Angel

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:04 PM

No brainer. The 40th.

Adult friends of a decade trump new friends of last year. But be sure to decline graciously and make separate plans to acknowledge their little one's birthday.

#3 intd242

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:06 PM

Agree. The 40th. With a card and gift for the 1st. original.gif

#4 green apples

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:07 PM

OMG, adult party without a doubt!

#5 FeralLIfeHacker

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:08 PM

Yeah even though it sounds like you currently have more contact with the first and know more people invited, you can't not go to someone you've known for 10 years because of someone you've known for a year and a baby at that.

Send around something nice for the baby and go to the 40th.

#6 GreenEgg

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:09 PM

Depends, do you have to take kids to the 40th  ph34r.gif

#7 Ice Queen

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:12 PM

No brainer.

Get a babysitter and go to the 40th!  biggrin.gif

#8 *melrose*

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:12 PM

40th for sure.

#9 jenchristo

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:12 PM

Kids are included for the 40th, but they have their own area and entertainment original.gif

#10 SusieGreen

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:14 PM

Without a doubt.

#11 CallMeFeral

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:15 PM


The child will likely have a party every year or two.
The adult's next big bash will probably be in 10 years.

And lots of other reasons!

#12 baddmammajamma

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:16 PM

Juice boxes in the park versus a catered pub party? New friend versus old? 40th all the way! original.gif

#13 Gegemite

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:38 PM

40th without a second thought.

#14 Epitome

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:45 PM

Attend the party where the guest of honor will be able to actually remember that you came along.

#15 bryce's-mummy

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:47 PM

DH goes to 40th- you go to 1st.

#16 Academic

Posted 21 February 2013 - 09:50 PM

I also say 40th.

#17 Taff

Posted 21 February 2013 - 10:13 PM

QUOTE (melbelle @ 21/02/2013, 10:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Attend the party where the guest of honor will be able to actually remember that you came along.

same as the above
Kind regards

#18 SuboptimallyPooks

Posted 21 February 2013 - 10:20 PM


I had my son's 1st birthday recently and quite a few people didn't attend. We kept it casual anyway, after all, what is a one year old gonna know? A few people who couldn't come sent cards and gifts or called us on his birthday. That was great.

#19 I*Love*Christmas

Posted 21 February 2013 - 10:23 PM

40th Birthday hands down. Even better that kids can go and be entertained. Awesome!

#20 ~Nic~

Posted 21 February 2013 - 10:29 PM

Ok, I am going to go completely against the grain here and say if it was me, I would go to the 1st birthday. Reason being that I am an absoute textbook introvert and the thought of being at any party where I only know a couple of people literally terrifies me. I would go to the 1st birthday, and make a point of organising lunch with the person from the 40th a day or two later.

I'm clearly in the minority though original.gif

Edited by ~Nic~, 21 February 2013 - 10:29 PM.

#21 becstar101

Posted 21 February 2013 - 11:00 PM

QUOTE (bryce's-mummy @ 21/02/2013, 10:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
DH goes to 40th- you go to 1st.

Out of curiosity, Why do you think it should be done this way?

I'd go the 40th all the way!

#22 Guest_Sunnycat_*

Posted 21 February 2013 - 11:28 PM

The 40th, you've been friends with them for over ten years.

#23 Peppery

Posted 22 February 2013 - 05:44 AM

Definitely the 40th!

#24 HRH Countrymel

Posted 22 February 2013 - 06:12 AM

QUOTE (melbelle @ 21/02/2013, 10:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Attend the party where the guest of honor will be able to actually remember that you came along.


Send a lovely present to the one year old though.
I suggest a book, one that you write a nice message inside the dust jacket of, that way no-one will even remember you didn't attend but for the life of the book it will be remembered that you acknowledged it!

#25 loges

Posted 22 February 2013 - 06:49 AM

Yep 40th...

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