Jump to content

..


  • Please log in to reply
12 replies to this topic

#1 Yours+Mine+1

Posted 21 February 2013 - 07:59 PM

.

Edited by Yours+Mine+1, 29 May 2014 - 11:42 PM.


#2 The Tiger

Posted 21 February 2013 - 10:42 PM

Go to court and get some orders in place and get your son back before his life is completely screwed. I have a 9 year old boy. Couldn't imagine him going through all that crap.

#3 butterflydreaming

Posted 21 February 2013 - 11:06 PM

Find the money for court this is your son we are talking about, if it means you eat 2 minute noodles for a year then so be it. I know I would do what ever it took to get my son back if he was in that sort of environment.

#4 her mum

Posted 21 February 2013 - 11:15 PM

I was reading and you kind of lost me at the part where you couldn't take your son to important appointments because you had work. Yep, it would be more convenient if he took him, but that's not happening.

You need to start taking him, and you need to go to court. Step up.

#5 Magnus

Posted 21 February 2013 - 11:35 PM

Sounds like your son really needs to be out of that environment. If DOCS got involved it must be pretty bad. The schooling, money and work issues sound difficult, but they seem like secondary concerns at the moment. It sounds like your son is at risk if he is being left unsupervised, his mental health needs aren't being met and there are potentially issues to do with poverty if his dad has a very limited income. Maybe your son has behavioural and possibly mental health issues because of the dad and the environment, rather than necessarily being innately difficult.

I don't think it's such a big issue if your daughter isn't having regular contact with her dad. Her dad's place sounds like a pretty bad environment for a child right at the moment.

It sounds like you're the only one at the moment who is in a position to advocate for your son and make sure he's OK.

#6 Yours+Mine+1

Posted 22 February 2013 - 05:12 AM

.

Edited by Yours+Mine+1, 29 May 2014 - 11:41 PM.


#7 ~char~

Posted 22 February 2013 - 05:59 AM

You really need to get legal advice.



#8 Natbub0610

Posted 22 February 2013 - 06:12 AM

I agree, get legal advice.

DS seems better in your care. Sounds like your XH is being a childish 9yo too instead of a parent.

You know in your heart, it's hard work to get him back but he's your son and you want whats best for him.

Besides Legal Aid, try and find a local Women's Centre, they can offer support and help you find legal advice and other services that you can use. You don't have to do it alone.

Good Luck!!


#9 Feral*Spikey*

Posted 22 February 2013 - 06:25 AM

If he is running away, report it to DOCS. If he is complaining about being hit, or your XH is complaining he 'can't handle him', call DOCS. Get him back on the radar.

Phone the family court and ask them what you need to do to get parenting orders. It may not be as costly as you think.

#10 FauxPas

Posted 22 February 2013 - 06:52 AM


Go to the family court.  Ask if there are any pro bono lawyers that can help - there are plenty of legal advice centres around where you can see a lawyer for free.  Even if you have to go a few times.

If you make enough noise, ask for help enough, someone will help you.  Even if you have to fill our forms yourself, google information about what to put in them ....  you need to do it.  Help your son as that sounds like an absolutely tragic situation that is just on the decline.

#11 Crinkle cut

Posted 22 February 2013 - 06:53 AM

Do what you have to do - everything else comes second.


QUOTE
if I dont work we dont eat/pay rent/live I have zero help from centerlink apart from a pittace of FTB.


Go down to centre link and make an appointment with a social worker.  Tell them you are quitting your job to take care of this situation.  You will almost surely get payments and information on other services available.  Make an appointment with a financial counsellor if you don't know how your going to cope of limited income - get a strict budget in place.  Once you have care arrangement sorted you can go back to work.  For now, your son is more important than staying off benefits.

#12 Illiterati

Posted 23 February 2013 - 07:38 AM

Given you currently don't get barely any ftb then: if you reduced work hours or went part-time you would have a lower pay and that may qualify you for higher ftb and rent assistance so you may actually not be too much worse off dropping a day or so of work.



#13 seepi

Posted 23 February 2013 - 09:38 AM

I would also be trying to get your son back.

right now he is a difficult 9 year old. If things dont' get under control a bit more for him, he will soon be an off the rails teenager, and it is very hard to get control back then.

seize the moment and try to do something now to sort this out and get your son a stable environment.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

What you need to know about pregnancy and health insurance

It's not just waiting periods that couples need to consider - there are other factors to consider when thinking about health insurance.

Yummy mummy

Nicole Trunfio breastfeeds baby on Elle magazine cover

Australian model Nicole Trunfio has taken the concept of multitasking to a fashionable new level for Elle Australia.

Warnings after baby girl died while sleeping in bouncer

Parents have been warned about the dangers of letting babies sleep in bouncers and swings following the death of a three-month-old girl.

Coping with fatigue as a parent

Sleep deprivation is a real hazard of caring for a baby. But there are ways to manage the challenges of fatigue better.

A very 21st century issue: parents, parks and smart phones

It's not all the parents, and it's not all the time, but there is often at least one doing it. And sometimes, that 'one' is me.

Appliances

Faulty washing machines linked to house fires

More than 80,000 faulty Samsung washing machines pose a fire threat in homes throughout Australia despite a nationwide recall of the machines.

'I had a lotus birth and I loved it'

Lotus birthing is not all that common, but for a number of women it feels like the most natural thing to do.

7 things you might not know about postnatal depression

Despite its widespread nature, there is still a great amount of mystery surrounding PND - and it's important to try unravelling as much of that as we can.

Is your family's car part of the world's biggest safety recall?

More than 50 million vehicles recalled for potentially lethal airbag fault - is your car affected?

Why drinking water can be deadly for babies

H2O is one of the necessities of life, but for babies a seemingly harmless amount of water can be fatal.

Mother-in-law faceplants during proposal

He had it all planned: a romantic proposal on a windswept beach. The whole family would be there so they'd all be able to celebrate the joyous moment together.

A preschooler suddenly goes mute - and it's not just shyness

When our son stopped talking, our sense of loss was painful and acute.

The mums who ask for a 'wife bonus'

They run their homes like domestic CEOs and work tirelessly to improve their family's social standing. And now, according to a new book, they want an annual perk from their husbands.

Woman shares photo of dimple on breast to warn others of cancer risk

A widely-shared Facebook photograph of a British woman's breast has raised awareness of a more subtle breast cancer symptom.

Starting a family despite a low sperm count

"I'd never really failed a test - how could I fail this particularly manly test?"

It's official: we must better protect our kids from toxic lead exposure

New guidelines have been released, aimed at reducing children's harmful exposure to lead. But they still don't go far enough.

Trouble-shooting toddler social skills

Chances are your toddler's behaviour is all completely normal - but here's how to tackle some common social problems.

Helping your first-born welcome a sibling

We did sigh with joy at the arrival of a royal princess - but, mostly, we sighed with pity at the sight of Prince George being taken to meet her.

Farewell, daytime nap

I've been in denial and I'm not too proud to beg, but it appears I must accept the fact that you have gone. I need to let you go.

The identical triplets who are one in 50 million

The father of identical triplets born in a Texas hospital says his three daughters, including conjoined twins, are "a miracle" sent by God.

Seven questions you should be asking about your health cover

If the last time you assessed your health cover was five years ago, there?s a chance it may no longer suit your needs. To ensure it?s still right for your family, click here for seven questions to ask.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

How to use gas effectively in labour

Many women in labour don't use gas effectively and suffer more side effects than benefits. Here's how to get the most out of this pain relief option.

'He has gastro but that's okay, right?': sick kid etiquette

We cannot place all children who are sick in a bubble till they recover, but we can give other parents a choice about exposing their kids to them.

Ada Nicodemou: 'I can never be completely happy again'

Home and Away actress Ada Nicodemou has opened up about the loss of her stillborn baby.

10 things to consider when you're thinking about trying for a baby

Before you start tracking your menstrual cycle and reading up on the best positions to get pregnant, there are a few other things you may want to consider.

How special surgery and IVF can create a post-vasectomy baby

Cricket legend Glenn McGrath and his second wife Sara are expecting their first child together, thanks to IVF and a delicate surgical sperm retrieval process that helped the couple to conceive.

Belle Gibson's mother 'disgusted and embarrassed'

The mother of disgraced wellness blogger Belle Gibson has accused her daughter of lying about her childhood in an attempt to garner public sympathy.

Doctor's mobile phone 'left inside c-section mum'

A new mum claims a doctor left his mobile phone inside her after delivering her baby via caesarean section.

I'm a mum and I'm following my dreams

I want my kids to know that no matter what happens in life, you can still be who it is that you've always wanted to be.

Those first daycare days

I had this innate 'mum' moment the other day.

'If one person had listened, my life would have been so different'

Katherine's father will die in prison for the horrifying sexual abuse of his daughter. Yet she is the one with the true life sentence.

This new plan undermines breastfeeding and baby health at everyone's expense

Mothers, babies, the health system and the wider society are going to pay the price of this new budget.

Couple to celebrate terminally ill baby's birthday in unique way

Baby Jai Bishop has lived at Starship Hospital for the past seven months, with his parents flying back and forth from Hokitika, 1100km away, to be by his side.

Life On Mars

It's men who need 'retraining', not women

We are all responsible for our own behaviour. Telling victims to harden up is wrong.

Baby Gammy's dad tries to claim charity money

The biological father of baby Gammy has reportedly tried to access charity money raised for the little boy's medical costs.

Where are the childcare places?

It?s all very well to encourage women to work if they choose to, but how can the measures lead to increased workforce participation when women are once again left holding the baby?

The pain of not having babies and not knowing why

After seven years of wishing, hoping, crying, punching pillows and shouting "why me?!", the end result is more than I ever thought possible.

Getting your family finances in order

Whether you're after a new car for a growing family, a bigger house, or are just fixing up your finances, here are the basics on borrowing.

Mum shares graphic selfie to warn against tanning

A mum has shared a graphic photo of her skin cancer treatment as a warning to others.

Does parenthood make us happier?

We can certainly gain higher levels of happiness when we become parents, but the trick is to not get overwhelmed by the pressures of raising our kids.

No, having a dog is not like having a human child

It's obvious these people dote on their pets, but they're barking up the wrong tree.

 

Top baby names

Baby Names

The numbers are in and we can now bring you the 2014 top baby name list for Australia.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.