Edited by Yours+Mine+1, 29 May 2014 - 11:42 PM.
Jump to content
12 replies to this topic
Posted 21 February 2013 - 10:42 PM
Go to court and get some orders in place and get your son back before his life is completely screwed. I have a 9 year old boy. Couldn't imagine him going through all that crap.
Posted 21 February 2013 - 11:06 PM
Find the money for court this is your son we are talking about, if it means you eat 2 minute noodles for a year then so be it. I know I would do what ever it took to get my son back if he was in that sort of environment.
Posted 21 February 2013 - 11:15 PM
I was reading and you kind of lost me at the part where you couldn't take your son to important appointments because you had work. Yep, it would be more convenient if he took him, but that's not happening.
You need to start taking him, and you need to go to court. Step up.
Posted 21 February 2013 - 11:35 PM
Sounds like your son really needs to be out of that environment. If DOCS got involved it must be pretty bad. The schooling, money and work issues sound difficult, but they seem like secondary concerns at the moment. It sounds like your son is at risk if he is being left unsupervised, his mental health needs aren't being met and there are potentially issues to do with poverty if his dad has a very limited income. Maybe your son has behavioural and possibly mental health issues because of the dad and the environment, rather than necessarily being innately difficult.
I don't think it's such a big issue if your daughter isn't having regular contact with her dad. Her dad's place sounds like a pretty bad environment for a child right at the moment.
It sounds like you're the only one at the moment who is in a position to advocate for your son and make sure he's OK.
Posted 22 February 2013 - 06:12 AM
I agree, get legal advice.
DS seems better in your care. Sounds like your XH is being a childish 9yo too instead of a parent.
You know in your heart, it's hard work to get him back but he's your son and you want whats best for him.
Besides Legal Aid, try and find a local Women's Centre, they can offer support and help you find legal advice and other services that you can use. You don't have to do it alone.
Posted 22 February 2013 - 06:25 AM
If he is running away, report it to DOCS. If he is complaining about being hit, or your XH is complaining he 'can't handle him', call DOCS. Get him back on the radar.
Phone the family court and ask them what you need to do to get parenting orders. It may not be as costly as you think.
Posted 22 February 2013 - 06:52 AM
Go to the family court. Ask if there are any pro bono lawyers that can help - there are plenty of legal advice centres around where you can see a lawyer for free. Even if you have to go a few times.
If you make enough noise, ask for help enough, someone will help you. Even if you have to fill our forms yourself, google information about what to put in them .... you need to do it. Help your son as that sounds like an absolutely tragic situation that is just on the decline.
Posted 22 February 2013 - 06:53 AM
Do what you have to do - everything else comes second.
if I dont work we dont eat/pay rent/live I have zero help from centerlink apart from a pittace of FTB.
Go down to centre link and make an appointment with a social worker. Tell them you are quitting your job to take care of this situation. You will almost surely get payments and information on other services available. Make an appointment with a financial counsellor if you don't know how your going to cope of limited income - get a strict budget in place. Once you have care arrangement sorted you can go back to work. For now, your son is more important than staying off benefits.
Posted 23 February 2013 - 07:38 AM
Given you currently don't get barely any ftb then: if you reduced work hours or went part-time you would have a lower pay and that may qualify you for higher ftb and rent assistance so you may actually not be too much worse off dropping a day or so of work.
Posted 23 February 2013 - 09:38 AM
I would also be trying to get your son back.
right now he is a difficult 9 year old. If things dont' get under control a bit more for him, he will soon be an off the rails teenager, and it is very hard to get control back then.
seize the moment and try to do something now to sort this out and get your son a stable environment.
1 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users
At just 37 years of age, with two young sons, Vicki was diagnosed with inflammatory breast cancer. Now her family wants all women to know the symptoms.
Pregnancy and birth is an intriguing process no matter where you are in the world. One soon-to-be father gleans wisdom from a new guide.
It’s not surprising that IVF is often seen as a negative journey towards the ultimate positive, but having a glass-half-full approach can make a big difference to the experience.
A mum explains why she and her husband are choosing to gift their leftover embryos to help strangers achieve their dream of parenthood.
Just as every baby is unique, so is every pregnancy. And that means morning sickness can vary a lot, too.
Why is it that the word ‘mumsy’ has connotations of such a negative nature – but seems to be the only other option apart from ‘yummy’?
As the waiting game of late pregnancy continues, this mum considers a few things that might hurry things up a little.
It has been a little over a month since William Tyrell disappeared from his grandmother's home, 33 long sleepless nights for his family as they mourn the absence of their cheeky young boy.
Babies born in the summer are much more likely to suffer from mood swings when they grow up, while those born in the winter are less likely to become irritable adults, scientists claim.
Suddenly single with a baby and an 11-year-old son, Tara O?Connell developed an app to improve the lives of mothers who were similarly overwhelmed.
As soon as your baby enters the world, everything else takes a back seat - even the necessities of daily life such as eating are severely compromised, right when you need energy the most.
The Live Lighter campaign will take people inside the human body to show the internal dangers of being overweight.
A new mum's first month of motherhood didn't pan out as expected when she lost a family member weeks after her baby's birth.
Facebook and Apple are hoping to provide women with the freedom to build their careers without the added pressure of having children at or by a certain age.
The idea of making a 'pregnancy contract' with your partner may sound a bit silly at first, but it can help make the transition to parenthood a lot smoother.
Burping babies vs burpees – yes, new mums and personal trainers live in different worlds. But they can work together - once you find the right match for you and your lifestyle.
Police say that an incident in which a man pulled on a woman?s pram while walking a popular Sydney route late last month was a misunderstanding.
Three weeks ago, my auntie, a midwife, developed a fever. Sitting here in Sydney basked in Australian sunshine, that shouldn't be big news.
One mum shares her frightening experience and vows to never take her health for granted again.
Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.
Top 5 Articles
Capture life more easily with the Canon Powershot D30. Shockproof, waterproof and dustproof, you can take it almost anywhere and shoot beautiful images, time after time. Enter now!
I am five years into this parenting gig and I’ve learnt that sleepless nights and changing dirty nappies are child’s play.
It's nice to celebrate a child making the shift from nappies to 'big kid' undies, but do we really need a semi-realistic used toilet cake to do it? Here are some of the best and worst cakes parents have used at 'potty parties' around the world.
Plan ahead - and do it now - to ensure festive season expenses don't break the bank.
A sequel is coming soon to the 2011 hit book 'Go the F*** to Sleep' - and this time, it's about mealtimes.
Handmade crafts to decorate and personalise your child's next birthday - from banners to cake decorations, we've got gorgeous party finds from Etsy.
Creative and practical storage ideas for the kids' toys and books can also add some stylish decor to your home. Visit babyology.com.au for more stylish modern finds for hip kids & parents.
Megan Gale has posed topless for magazine's 'sexiest people' issue, five months after welcoming her son.
Maybe the mum I saw in that waiting room, seemingly disconnected from her baby, doesn’t have the support she needs.
Starting a family doesn't always mean moving into a bigger house - not yet, anyway.
What's in a name?
Looking for a classic name, or an unusual name? Our Baby Name Finder is for you, search or browse to refine your shortlist.