Jump to content

Did four kids push you over the edge?


  • Please log in to reply
19 replies to this topic

#1 thelms

Posted 20 February 2013 - 08:35 AM

I have three beautiful children (5, 3 & 1yrs) and can't get the thought of number four out of my head.

I work part time (stressful at times), DH has a great job that whilst it can be stressful, it's not too demanding time wise, he is home a fair bit.

Life is hectic but doable and enjoyable most of the time.

I am worried that if we have a forth baby it may push us over the edge (trying to juggle house, work, school etc)... I would expect the first year to be difficult but after that do things settle down? Is four a lot more work than three?

What's your experience?



#2 MotherClucker

Posted 20 February 2013 - 08:42 AM

Yes but only because 3 & 4 came at the same time and I had a 1 and 3 year old at the time roll2.gif

I still went back for #5 though so it couldnt of been that traumatising.

I think where there is a will, there is a way. You will be fine. I am guessing you have up and down days now and the same will apply when/if #4 comes.  

You have some nice gaps. I say go for it original.gif

#3 pippityroo

Posted 20 February 2013 - 08:48 AM

Nope, I've managed fine. My 3 were 5, 3 & 18mths when #4 came along. (Now 6, almost 4, 2 & 6mths).

It's been no more hard work than it was with 3. You kinda just gotta deal & get on with it. The older 2 are pretty good at helping if I needed (especially my 6yr old), so it's not as full on. We all adjusted pretty quickly, and after a few days it was like #4 had always been with us.

I'm eager for #5, but that won't be for another 5 years, IF I manage to convince the husband.

#4 crazyhappy

Posted 20 February 2013 - 11:07 AM

hasn't pushed me over the edge yet - however our 4th child is only 3 months old. I expect it will get harder when he is on the move.

I haven't found it more work in terms of household work, I am used to being woken overnight and already needed to be organised with 3 kids to make sure we all got to where we need to go on time. The things I have found difficult aren't really because he is the 4th child, but just because he hates the car and screams when I have to take the other kids to swimming etc.

4 is my limit though, I know that I would feel to stretched with more and I like to be able to spend time with each child indivdually. I guess everyone has different limits. My DH and I are so happy to have 4 and its perfect for us even though its very busy.

#5 gizboo

Posted 20 February 2013 - 11:13 AM

Nope. I found 4 to be easier then 3!
#4 is turning 2yo tomorrow and we survived unscathed so far original.gif

DD2 turned up 3wks after DD1 started school (so all were under 5yo at one point), so we had to balance out school runs, with other activities. I think we were lucky in that she has always been pretty easy going. No edges in sight, so far!

#6 SummerStar

Posted 20 February 2013 - 03:06 PM

I've managed. And it's easy enough because I have older children who help out alot. But she has by far been my most difficult child, though I wouldn't be with out her now, I probably wouldn't have gone again had I known... If that makes sense.
Couldn't imagine life without her now though.
She's cured me of ever contemplating any more though... That's for sure.

Edited by SummerStar, 20 February 2013 - 03:07 PM.


#7 CafeCat

Posted 20 February 2013 - 03:09 PM

We have five so four must have been okay  wink.gif

One thing I have realised is when they were younger things were a lot easier to manage. This year with five kids across three different schools and all with differing interests/sports/activities plus two full time working parents things are starting to get a little stretched. I think I may be looking over the edge of that cliff for a soft landing place some day soon - I don't think I could get a more diverse lot of kids if I tried.

#8 emwill

Posted 20 February 2013 - 03:16 PM

No, it's a really nice balance in our house, we were blessed with 2 boys and 2 girls and although there are large age gaps between them, they always have another sibling to play with, ask for help, snuggle with etc.
I only wish the age gaps hadn't been so big (just they way it turned out for us - no reason other than that) as it feels like we play 'deja vu' with the younger two after having done it with the older two. Some days it feels like my life is on repeat original.gif

Edited by emwill, 20 February 2013 - 03:18 PM.


#9 KBM

Posted 20 February 2013 - 03:36 PM

I struggle with 3!  But DH is fifo so, half the time, Im doing it by myself.

Now that older two are nearly 8 and 6, its the bickering and argueing that drives me batty.  I think I liked it better when they were babies, waking me every 2 hours, changing horrible pooey nappies and not being able to do anything for themselves.

I think you know in yourself what your own personality is like and how much you can handle without going nuts.

#10 bec4

Posted 22 February 2013 - 11:05 AM

No, but 5 did.  rolleyes.gif

I think it is just because they are so far apart in age and all have different interests and lots of sports etc.  Some days I want to just jump off the cliff.


Our oldest isn't even living at home anymore, I don't know whether this has made is harder or easier.

Bec

Edited by bec4, 22 February 2013 - 11:06 AM.


#11 kabailz13

Posted 22 February 2013 - 11:31 AM

We made the jump from 3 to 5 with our twins.

When they were born, the others were 2, just 5 and 9 (4 kids 5yrs and under). It has been hard at times and not as enjoyable as it was when the other kids were little but I believe that is more to do with their being twins than the 4th or 5th child.

Lately I've even found myself wondering about #6!!! OMG someone shoot me Tounge1.gif

#12 podg

Posted 22 February 2013 - 11:49 AM

It certainly has us teetering. While our marriage is solid and I wouldn't choose a kid to send back, four under 6 is a very busy and challenging time. I spend most of my time running just to keep on top, my house is a mess (round the edges), and if I was to get sick I don't know how we'd cope.

Last week the car had to go in, we spent most of Thursday at the doctor's and my washing machine was on the blink all week. I had a bit of a cry on the Friday evening when I hadn't managed to bake a cake for DH's birthday, it had been very stressful.

#13 thelms

Posted 22 February 2013 - 12:06 PM

Thank you for your experiences...

I think we will gamble it and pray we don't get twins!!

#14 Bam1

Posted 22 February 2013 - 01:26 PM

QUOTE (thelms @ 22/02/2013, 01:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Thank you for your experiences...

I think we will gamble it and pray we don't get twins!!


Pray hard!  I don't think #4 would have pushed us over the edge if he hadn't brought #5 as well!

#15 FeralLIfeHacker

Posted 22 February 2013 - 11:58 PM

No #4 was a delight and easy peasy, somewhere around #5 or 6 I lost the plot laugh.gif .  Probably didn't help that 5 and 6 were only 13 months apart.  I was just saying to someone today that there are whole periods of time during that stage that I don't even remember ohmy.gif

#16 mumandboys

Posted 23 February 2013 - 05:24 AM

I have 4, I was like you, yearning for a 4th.  Mine are similarly spaced to yours.

I'm struggling to stretch myself across the 4 kids and their different needs.  I often worry that I'm not meeting anyone's needs (and I only have two in school).

My youngest will turn 3 this year, and as a PP said, I think it actually gets busier as they get older - which is scary, quite frankly.

Having said all that, I don't have any regrets, and I no longer yearn for another.  So I take that as a sign that #4 was meant to be!

#17 kabailz13

Posted 23 February 2013 - 05:07 PM

QUOTE (thelms @ 22/02/2013, 10:06 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Thank you for your experiences...

I think we will gamble it and pray we don't get twins!!


hehehe I started a thread the month before I got pregnant with our twins asking how many people really have twins as #4 and #5 Tounge1.gif

Good luck! biggrin.gif

#18 Rolex

Posted 24 February 2013 - 07:12 AM

QUOTE (kabailz13 @ 23/02/2013, 05:07 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
hehehe I started a thread the month before I got pregnant with our twins asking how many people really have twins as #4 and #5 Tounge1.gif

Good luck! biggrin.gif

Hahahaha, I remember that Kelly!!  
(I am under a new username now wink.gif )

I have #4 on the way now but my other kids will be 12, 10, 8.  Hopefully everything will fall into place!

#19 SummerStar

Posted 24 February 2013 - 07:14 AM

That's a similar age gap to my kids, it's way easier in my opinion than having them all close together. I have friends with them all close and they are more flat out than I am.
But what I'm finding is there's always someone there to entertain the youngest but when it's just me and her it can be a bit trying. I can't give her the constant attention the kids can because I have stuff to do around the house too.

#20 librablonde

Posted 24 February 2013 - 07:24 AM

For me, once I had more than 3 kids, 2 extra ones made no real difference to the chaos. So now we have 5 and it's great. Very hard, messy, loud, sticky,  maddening, exhausting... but great original.gif




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Exclusive Black Friday Sale!

Get over 40% off selected products, including prams, baby carriers, cloth nappies, sleeping bags and much more! 24 hours only, on May 6 - register now for your special code.

Kelly Clarkson shares first photos of son

Kelly Clarkson has shown off the first photos of her son, Remington Alexander Blackstock.

5 childbirth myths that need to be busted

Birth is an unpredictable, mysterious process that intrigues us all, and there is a lot of misinformation out there.

Mum of three fatally shot by toddler while driving

A US mother has been shot by her toddler while driving on a highway in Wisconsin.

All you need is one minute to work out

The seven-minute-work out is old news. Research shows the effectiveness of going hell-for-leather for just one minute.

Pregnant women needed to join diabetes study

Pregnant woman in country Australia will help Adelaide researchers figure out why cases of type 1 diabetes have doubled over the past two decades.

Just announced: the Mountain Buggy Unirider

It's the perfect solution to combat those toddler meltdowns when they no longer want to be in a pram but can't walk long distances.

Authorities euthanise dog that fatally bit a newborn baby

A pit bull mix that fatally bit a 3-day-old infant last week has been euthanised, authorities said.

The push for Medicare to fund lactation consultants

While meeting with a lactation consultant can make an enormous difference to a new mother, it's not a service that is available through the public health system.

Why it's perfectly natural to dislike other people's children

Members of a popular forum are fiercely debating whether it is acceptable to dislike a friend's child.

Woman gives birth on plane, names baby after airline

A pregnant woman who unexpectedly gave birth on a flight has named her new baby after the airline, Jetstar.

Heartwarming photos show the joy of adoption after foster care

Children living in foster care can feel like their future is less than clear. But that uncertainty disappears the day they are adopted by their "forever family" 

'Oh my god, it's a baby!' Mum shocked to give birth

When the cramps started to kick in, Klara Dollan just assumed a painful period was starting.

Mum's Facebook plea: 'Help me find my daughter's father'

Kerryn has a unusual present planned for daughter Imi's 13th birthday celebrations - she hopes to be able to be able to give the soon-to-be the teenager her first ever photo of her dad.

Is it possible for your house to be too clean?

Our houses are cleaner than ever before. But how clean is too clean? Could a sterile home be putting your family's health at risk?

Millions of Monkeys: puzzles that grow with your toddler

Here's a puzzle that grows with them; the Puzzle Grow Pack by Millions of Monkeys.

Baby names from Britpop

If you grew up in the 90s you might want to look to the genre of Britpop music for baby name inspiration.

What to eat and drink when you have gastro

When you catch a bug that causes acute infectious gastroenteritis (gastro), your stomach and intestinal tract become inflamed, causing diarrhoea, nausea, vomiting, abdominal cramping and pain. The last thing you probably feel like doing is eating.

'To this day, I owe her my life'

Would I have survived if I hadn't crossed that street?

Why baby Sonny needs you to vaccinate your children

Caitlin is a firm believer in the importance of immunisation to protect children from harmful and deadly diseases.

Five-year-old's photo captures beauty of motherhood

There is no make-up or special outfits and hairdos, but the five-year-old boy who took this picture captured the essence of motherhood as well as any professional photographer.

Babies know whether you are naughty or nice

Studies have shown that infants in the first months of life try to avoid dealing with social wrongdoers - for example, sharing less with them and helping them less - and they expect others to, too.

 
Advertisement
 

Top 5 Articles

Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

The babies who are one in 70 million

Bethani Webb was excited to find out she was pregnant, but the first time mum did not realise she was carrying four babies not one.

Exclusive Black Friday Sale!

Get over 40% off selected products, including prams, baby carriers, cloth nappies, sleeping bags and much more! 24 hours only, on May 6 - register now for your special code.

Cafe offers breastfeeding mums a free cup of tea

A Sydney cafe is offering breastfeeding mums free cups of tea in a bid to show support for the right of women to nurse their babies wherever they choose.

To snip or not to snip? When the decision is not clear cut

Jamie Oliver, who considered a vasectomy, is to be a father again. A fellow dad reflects on his own decision 11 years ago

Doctors stunned by rare twins born almost six weeks apart

To everyone's surprise, Kristen Miller "kept doing better each day", keeping her second baby safe.

Baby book ideas for modern parents

Before my son was born I was given a lovely baby book full of blank pages waiting to be filled with weights and heights and first words.

The adorable smile of a baby seeing his mum clearly for the first time

There is no doubt seeing their child smile for the first time is an unforgettable moment for parents everywhere.

Mum tells how toddler 'nearly hung himself' in cot mishap

When Alison Johnson put her 18-month-old Caleb down for a nap, she had no reason to believe her son was in any danger.

Babies are still switched at birth? Yes, it can happen

All my panic and tears aside, my biggest question looking back is about the kind of security measures used in the maternity ward.

Doctors slammed for taking selfie with newborn

Everyone who visits a mum in hospital in the days following childbirth wants to get a photo with the new baby.

ergoPouch Twosie Sleepsuit for winter breastfeeding

Finally, there's a way to keep warm while breastfeeding through winter.

Health check: How long does sex 'normally' last?

What to do with this information? My advice would be to try not to think about it during the throes of passion.

When breastfeeding sucks: fixing common problems

From niplash to tight boobs, biting to milk supply issues, Pinky McKay looks at common breastfeeding issues and how to solve them.

10 things I've learnt in my first six months with twins

Six months on we're all still alive, and the more we get to know each other the easier the days become.

Mum's loving kiss leaves baby fighting for life

Kirsty Carrington thought nothing of giving her newborn son a kiss, little did she know it would leave the baby fighting for life.

When doing chores is your new 'me time'

After children, 'me time' looks a little different.

Get going: 14 travel strollers for families on the move

A stroller can make or break travelling with a baby or toddler. Here are 15 great single travel stroller options.

10 ways toddlers are terrific

It always pays to remind yourself of how terrific toddlers can be - they're little like this for such a short time

 

ENTER NOW

Do your kids love bananas?

This is the comp for you! We have $800 worth of Myer gift cards and boxes of Australian Bananas to be won. Entry is simple: just post a pic of your little one enjoying a banana in the comments of the FB post to enter.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.