Jump to content

You know you are a parent when...
**fluff**


  • Please log in to reply
20 replies to this topic

#1 *concerned*

Posted 15 February 2013 - 08:59 PM

I was just having a shower and when I went to get the shampoo I found a piece of plastic toast from the kids cooking toys in there too. It barely registered, then I realised that it would only not register with a parent and had a chuckle.

So give us your ending to the topic title... other ones I thought of were:

- you hear a noise that wakes you up and instead of thinking "Is someone breaking in?' you think "What's wrong with the baby?"
- Easter is a perfectly legitimate time for the kids to have chocolate for dinner  ph34r.gif

#2 podg

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:03 PM

When there's someone looking into the gap between the bowl and the seat saying ' Look (sister) I think I can see mummy's poo coming!'

#3 Marchioness Flea

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:04 PM

Your husband inserts a disc into this computer and it doesn't work, so he opens the drive thingy and an old credit card comes out.
Our daughter went through a phase of sticking things into slots...heater vents, computer disc drives, you get the picture.

#4 Rach_V

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:07 PM

... you find yourself wandering around the house randomly singing "We're riding in a hellllllliiiiiicopter, the rotor blades go wocka, wocka, wocka, etc etc."

... a trip to the supermarket minus the kids is as good as a trip to any day spa!

... It's NYE and YOU'RE the designated driver for your OWN parents!!!

#5 MintyBiscuit

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:07 PM

You're stupidly proud when one of the first words your child has learned context for is poo

#6 ~Nic~

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:07 PM

QUOTE (*concerned* @ 15/02/2013, 09:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
- Easter is a perfectly legitimate time for the kids to have chocolate for dinner  breakfastph34r.gif



... you know that most mornings, you will need to avoid the lego / matchbox car booby trap that your 3yo has left on the floor next to the bed.

#7 Black Velvet

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:09 PM

You hear a kid call out Mum in the shops and you automatically turn around even when your kids aren't with you.

#8 Mumof32b!

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:10 PM

You hold out your hands to catch vomit without breaking the conversation you are having at the time  sick.gif

#9 Loz07

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:10 PM

You check on your child/baby playing when they stop making noise, not when you can hear them having a whinge/grizzle.... wink.gif

#10 Cranky Kitten

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:11 PM

...you don't bat an eyelid at the statement (accompanied by much gagging and coughing from child) "well, don't stick your foot so far down your throat then!" coming from your husband at bath-time.


Or you open your bag to find your keys, but instead pull out 3 matchbox cars, a tube of teething gel and a half chewed piece of toast before you find them.

#11 *concerned*

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:14 PM

I remembered another one I forgot to add...

- when you can't find your mobile phone and looking in the decorative pot with sticks in it is a legitimate place to look...

#12 iheartu

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:16 PM

You rock an imaginary infant, while standing in a shop/cafe/pub.

All manner of poo talk is normal.

10pm is a late night.







#13 opethmum

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:21 PM

Poo does not scare you no matter how it is presented.

When you hear a child cry you think "thank goodness it's not mine" and when it is "oh gosh damn it"

The fifteen minute conversation you have with your DD why daddy/mummy does not need help with going to the toilet results in being told by said child that you like cleaning up pooey nappies.

When you do not require weight measures any more because you compare them to your child's size.

When getting to bed before 8:30 is a good night.

When you are at work/anywhere sans child humming the tunes of your child's toys and their favourite songs.

#14 Alacritous~Andy

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:22 PM

QUOTE (iheartu @ 15/02/2013, 09:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You rock an imaginary infant, while standing in a shop/cafe/pub.

All manner of poo talk is normal.

10pm is a late night.


I caught myself patting the "bottom" of a bag of flour while waiting at the checkout once.

#15 ~Mintie~

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:23 PM

- when you have had poo floating in your bath (thanks bath buddy!)
- when you've had milky snot drip into your mouth ( holding baby up above my head, wriggling him about and obviously not enough attention to detail..)

#16 alxase

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:30 PM

Packing for a holiday becomes a week long ordeal with several lists involved and you still forget something.
You haven't added a photo of yourself on Facebook since you became a mum but you have clogged up everyone's news feed with a bazillion photos of your kids.

#17 dogma

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:37 PM

When you wake up with one arm and one leg hanging off the side of the bed while your pint sized sleeping partner is spreadeagled across 7/8ths of it... When you're so used to listening to the Wiggles that you have it on even when by yourself... When you'll sing and dance on a public street to entertain same pint sized poppet... When you hear yourself saying "we are not going to the park unless you put your knickers on"...

#18 surprizzzed

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:38 PM

You need to go to the toilet and you automatically start walking to the parent's room at the shopping centre even though you're alone (I did this today!)

#19 FlamingoG

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:42 PM

When you find yourself complimenting the 'good farting' going on.

And when internet shopping is all about finding baby clothes not handbags.

#20 Flaxen

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:49 PM

Having your child sleep through the night is a godsend, but strangely annoying too, because you still wake up at the usual times they wake up, then cant get back to sleep cause you are thinking, "any minute now, any minute now...."  (It took a good two weeks of DD sleeping through the night before i stopped waking up myself.)




When out and about, the smell of a pooey nappy fills you with dread and you secretly hope its your friends child who needs changing, not yours  ph34r.gif


The back seat of your car is unrecognisable- and slightly resembles the toybox thats coincidentally empty, with the addition of kicked-off tiny shoes, socks and and the half eaten bit of toast from yesterday.

Getting excited over shoe shopping is no longer related to a new pair of heels on sale, rather a pair of functional childrens shoes, in the right size, and costing less than your last petrol reciept.

#21 ~nikki~

Posted 16 February 2013 - 02:10 AM

When your in a hotel for a romantic night without the kids, take of your bra to get in the spa and a dummy falls out!




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Get your FREE Baby & Toddler Show ticket!

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

A solo birth, a wasp swarm and a forest fire: mum and baby's amazing story of survival

Desperate, out of petrol and low on food, a new mother lit a fire in the hope of attracting attention.

Boy found on swing died of hypothermia and dehydration, autopsy finds

The story was chilling and heartbreaking: a three-year-old boy was found dead in a Southern Maryland park, his mother pushing him on the swing.

Child's play and laughter help battle fatigue

Feeling fatigued? Uh-huh, thought as much. Join the queue.

Dad shares entertaining 'how to hold a baby' clip

For many new dads, their own child is the first baby they have ever held. So one dad has posted an instructive YouTube video titled "How to Hold a Baby".

The Australian baby with 100,000 Facebook fans

She may be only eight months old, but Egypt has already amassed more than 100,000 fans and received a letter from royalty - Hollywood royalty that is.

Public welcome outside church for Princess Charlotte's christening

Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have invited well-wishers to see Princess Charlotte outside church in Sandringham on day of her baptism.

Tongue tie: what you need to know

Tongue and lip tie can lead to many problems for babies - and their parents. Here are the signs of tongue tie and how it's treated.

My daughter is small but that doesn't matter

My daughter may be small, but it's my job as her parent to refocus back where it belongs - on who she is as a person

Wet wipes linked to rise in allergic reactions

The government has issued a health warning after a rise in allergic skin reactions has been linked to a preservative found in some wet wipes.

Gay couple in their 80s first to wed in Dallas after Supreme Court ruling

Love may have won, but it came with quite the wait.

William Tyrrell's family marks birthday with cake and renewed appeal

The family of missing boy William Tyrrell will mark his fourth birthday on Friday making a cake to share with friends and family as NSW police renewed their public appeal for information on his disappearance.

What all parents should know about safe babywearing

A picture of Ryan Reynolds always gets the girls talking, and a recently shared photo has done exactly that - but this time, it's for all the wrong reasons.

Baby's head shape reveals potentially fatal condition

Thinking her baby just had an unusually shaped head, a mother was shocked to discover it was instead linked to a dangerous condition.

'Help - my toddler hits me!'

My toddler has started hitting when he gets frustrated, is feeling ignored, or just thinks it might be fun.

Why IVF success rates may not be what you think

Transparency, accountability and responsibilityare essential measures to protect IVF vulnerable patients.

On the 10th anniversary of my son's death

This day marks a significant day. Today marks 10 years since I lost my son Kai.

Mother-in-law 'from hell' inspires survival guide

The happily ever after Nicola Milan had imagined wasn't to be – and she blames her mother-in-law.

Name your baby Quinoa, win a $10K gift card

Choosing a name for your little bundle of joy is always a major decision. It can be something traditional, trendy, creative … or inspired by the menu of your favourite chain restaurant.

Owning a pair of nail scissors does not make me a hairdresser

It's been a whole year since sleeping in until 10am. A whole year since having a peaceful shower.

The 83 children who were tragically let down in the last decade

Over a 10-year period, 83 children died from domestic violence abuse in NSW, with three quarters of the victims aged five years or under, the NSW Ombudsman has revealed.

Expert Q&A: Gross motor skill development in toddlers and preschoolers

Dr Katie Heathershaw answers questions about jumping, toe walking, riding a bike and being pigeon toed.

Is it reasonable to expect your partner to give up drinking in pregnancy?

From the moment that I fell pregnant with my son, I realised just how much my life had already started to change.

Stroke victim joins class action against makers of popular contraceptive pill

"I was terrified I would always be this way. The pill needs to come with a much higher warning."

Sexy time

Why you should get excited about scheduling sex

Unfortunately, the belief that sex should always be spontaneous is a myth. It just isn't.

When newborn photoshoots get messy

When it comes to newborn photoshoots, it is all about the timing.

Orphaned baby daughter Ayla wakes from coma

Former All Black Jerry Collins' critically injured orphaned daughter has awoken from her coma and is able to bottle-feed.

Dad takes miraculous catch while feeding baby

One American father has taken multitasking to a new level at a Cubs-Dodgers baseball game at Wrigley Field.

'Samuel is our firstborn, and he will never be forgotten'

Having lost their firstborn at one day old, the Carrolls were overjoyed to welcome their daughter Isobel into the world a year later.

Channel 10's Sarah Harris expecting first child

The Studio host Sarah Harris doesn't mind if her first baby is a boy or girl, but she does hope it is born with one thing in particular.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

27 funny ultrasound pictures

Ultrasounds give you a look at your growing baby ... and sometimes what appears to their womb-buddy, or your bub in an amusing position.

The top 6 misleading parenting terms

From 'morning sickness' to 'the terrible twos', there are many parenting terms that are misleading.

When 'good' nannies go bad

While most nannies take pride in their work, there can be some who have a hidden side.

Woman hospitalised for skinny jeans injury

Beware: skinny jeans might be bad for your health.

Gauze seeding: the bacteria-breeding birth trend

A number of women having caesarean deliveries are now taking steps to give their baby a better 'microbiome' start in life.

Jimmy Fallon writes new children's book for dads

Jimmy Fallon, host of NBC's The Tonight Show, recently wrote a children's book about every father's secret wish for their baby's first word to be "dada" - not "mama".

28 names for babies born in winter

Looking for some baby name inspiration for a bub born during the colder months? Here are 28 options from around the world to consider.

The horrible act that sparked a brawl at child's birthday party

The uncle of the seven-year-old girl at the centre of the brawl at child's birthday party in Sydney's west has described the events leading up to the alarming show of violence.

Babies 'benefit from iPads at a young age': study

More often than not, you'll read that screen time for children should be kept to a minimum - but some scientists are now challenging this way of thinking.

Do mums really just obsessively talk about their children?

Natalie Reilly describes three main types of conversations mothers have. And, surprise, they're not all about kids.

Why some dogs might attack babies or young kids

A baby's smell, the noises it makes and even its gaze can contribute to the potential for a dog attack.

Mum demands refund for 'beargina' christening cake

It was meant to be a tasteful cake to help celebrate a three-year-old's christening.

5 things no one warns you about after giving birth

How many times have you been warned about all the sleepless nights you have to 'look forward to' when you become a parent?

Police officer sang nursery rhyme as heartbreaking photo was taken

A police officer arrived at a devastating scene on Thursday: a car crash resulting in all passengers being thrown from the vehicle.

Don't worry, working mums: Just leave Dad in charge at home

Want to open the boardroom doors for women? Encourage - heck, praise - dads who stay home with their children.

Hilaria Baldwin shares post-baby selfie

Just two days after giving birth, actor Alec Balwin's wife posted a post-baby picture on social media.

'Help - my child won't ever do what I ask!'

Compliance is part of the parent-child relationship, but so is resistance. It's all natural.

Postnatal depression support gets $23 million boost in NSW

The Baird government will include $22.8 million in Tuesday's NSW budget to expand a program designed to help parents at risk of postnatal depression (PND).

'I'm just as tired, scared and stressed as you': stay-at-home dad's plea

I'm really lucky to have two great kids, but I found it really tough with so much being aimed at the mothers and not the fathers.

 

FREE TICKET

Get your FREE ticket to the Baby & Toddler Show

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.