Jump to content

You know you are a parent when...
**fluff**


  • Please log in to reply
19 replies to this topic

#1 *concerned*

Posted 15 February 2013 - 08:59 PM

I was just having a shower and when I went to get the shampoo I found a piece of plastic toast from the kids cooking toys in there too. It barely registered, then I realised that it would only not register with a parent and had a chuckle.

So give us your ending to the topic title... other ones I thought of were:

- you hear a noise that wakes you up and instead of thinking "Is someone breaking in?' you think "What's wrong with the baby?"
- Easter is a perfectly legitimate time for the kids to have chocolate for dinner  ph34r.gif

#2 podg

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:03 PM

When there's someone looking into the gap between the bowl and the seat saying ' Look (sister) I think I can see mummy's poo coming!'

#3 Jenflea

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:04 PM

Your husband inserts a disc into this computer and it doesn't work, so he opens the drive thingy and an old credit card comes out.
Our daughter went through a phase of sticking things into slots...heater vents, computer disc drives, you get the picture.

#4 Rach_V

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:07 PM

... you find yourself wandering around the house randomly singing "We're riding in a hellllllliiiiiicopter, the rotor blades go wocka, wocka, wocka, etc etc."

... a trip to the supermarket minus the kids is as good as a trip to any day spa!

... It's NYE and YOU'RE the designated driver for your OWN parents!!!

#5 MintyBiscuit

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:07 PM

You're stupidly proud when one of the first words your child has learned context for is poo

#6 ~Nic~

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:07 PM

QUOTE (*concerned* @ 15/02/2013, 09:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
- Easter is a perfectly legitimate time for the kids to have chocolate for dinner  breakfastph34r.gif



... you know that most mornings, you will need to avoid the lego / matchbox car booby trap that your 3yo has left on the floor next to the bed.

#7 Black Velvet

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:09 PM

You hear a kid call out Mum in the shops and you automatically turn around even when your kids aren't with you.

#8 Mumof32b!

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:10 PM

You hold out your hands to catch vomit without breaking the conversation you are having at the time  sick.gif

#9 Loz07

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:10 PM

You check on your child/baby playing when they stop making noise, not when you can hear them having a whinge/grizzle.... wink.gif

#10 Cranky Kitten

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:11 PM

...you don't bat an eyelid at the statement (accompanied by much gagging and coughing from child) "well, don't stick your foot so far down your throat then!" coming from your husband at bath-time.


Or you open your bag to find your keys, but instead pull out 3 matchbox cars, a tube of teething gel and a half chewed piece of toast before you find them.

#11 *concerned*

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:14 PM

I remembered another one I forgot to add...

- when you can't find your mobile phone and looking in the decorative pot with sticks in it is a legitimate place to look...

#12 iheartu

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:16 PM

You rock an imaginary infant, while standing in a shop/cafe/pub.

All manner of poo talk is normal.

10pm is a late night.







#13 opethmum

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:21 PM

Poo does not scare you no matter how it is presented.

When you hear a child cry you think "thank goodness it's not mine" and when it is "oh gosh damn it"

The fifteen minute conversation you have with your DD why daddy/mummy does not need help with going to the toilet results in being told by said child that you like cleaning up pooey nappies.

When you do not require weight measures any more because you compare them to your child's size.

When getting to bed before 8:30 is a good night.

When you are at work/anywhere sans child humming the tunes of your child's toys and their favourite songs.

#14 Alacritous~Andy

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:22 PM

QUOTE (iheartu @ 15/02/2013, 09:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You rock an imaginary infant, while standing in a shop/cafe/pub.

All manner of poo talk is normal.

10pm is a late night.


I caught myself patting the "bottom" of a bag of flour while waiting at the checkout once.

#15 ~Mintie~

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:23 PM

- when you have had poo floating in your bath (thanks bath buddy!)
- when you've had milky snot drip into your mouth ( holding baby up above my head, wriggling him about and obviously not enough attention to detail..)

#16 dogma

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:37 PM

When you wake up with one arm and one leg hanging off the side of the bed while your pint sized sleeping partner is spreadeagled across 7/8ths of it... When you're so used to listening to the Wiggles that you have it on even when by yourself... When you'll sing and dance on a public street to entertain same pint sized poppet... When you hear yourself saying "we are not going to the park unless you put your knickers on"...

#17 surprizzzed

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:38 PM

You need to go to the toilet and you automatically start walking to the parent's room at the shopping centre even though you're alone (I did this today!)

#18 FlamingoG

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:42 PM

When you find yourself complimenting the 'good farting' going on.

And when internet shopping is all about finding baby clothes not handbags.

#19 Flaxen

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:49 PM

Having your child sleep through the night is a godsend, but strangely annoying too, because you still wake up at the usual times they wake up, then cant get back to sleep cause you are thinking, "any minute now, any minute now...."  (It took a good two weeks of DD sleeping through the night before i stopped waking up myself.)




When out and about, the smell of a pooey nappy fills you with dread and you secretly hope its your friends child who needs changing, not yours  ph34r.gif


The back seat of your car is unrecognisable- and slightly resembles the toybox thats coincidentally empty, with the addition of kicked-off tiny shoes, socks and and the half eaten bit of toast from yesterday.

Getting excited over shoe shopping is no longer related to a new pair of heels on sale, rather a pair of functional childrens shoes, in the right size, and costing less than your last petrol reciept.

#20 ~nikki~

Posted 16 February 2013 - 02:10 AM

When your in a hotel for a romantic night without the kids, take of your bra to get in the spa and a dummy falls out!




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

11 things that will happen when you're breastfeeding

After having three children and various degrees of success feeding them all, there's one thing I can tell you: virtually nothing will go as planned.

Surgery for baby born with a tail

A baby born with a tail has had it removed after doctors feared the birth defect might cause long term damage to his lower body.

When 'skin to skin' becomes a family affair

An adorable photo of a little boy and his dad enjoying skin to skin contact with newborn twins is melting hearts everywhere.

35 hilariously weird 'top tips'

Who would have thunk it? We never knew there were so many uses for feminine hygiene products. 

Pregnancy skin woes: acne, dry skin, itchy skin

Here are some of the most common skin complaints in pregnancy and how to tackle them, face on.

Watch this fun dance class for babywearing dads

Is there anything sexier than a babywearing dad?

Parents, this is how to cut grapes to avoid choking

One mum has learnt a harrowing lesson about the best way to cut grapes to make it safe for toddlers and little kids to eat.

When your kids have totally different temperaments

Sometimes it has felt like whiplash parenting. She perches watchfully while I vacuum; he tries to climb on and go for a ride.

How do our stress levels influence our baby?

Since having my second baby a number of people have commented on how placid, content and settled he is and, similarly, many have commented on how this is a reflection of how I am with him.

Separation anxiety isn't just for kids

Despite its prevalence, most doctors tend to be reluctant to diagnose adult patients with separation anxiety.

A charm bracelet, a boy, and my beliefs questioned

I was staring at the face of my son, realising that my once steadfast decision to be open minded was quickly unravelling at the seams.

Why I'm so grateful for Hayden Panettiere's PND honesty

There are baby steps and giant leaps forward. But there are steps backwards, too. And, oh, how they can hurt your heart.

The heartbreaking story of little Moko

The mother of 3-year-old Moko Rangitoheriri said she should have picked up on the signs. {Warning: distressing content}

Kate Beckinsale and teen daughter recreate birth photo

Kate Beckinsale has recreated her daughter Lily's birth photo, 17 years after she was born.

The adult-size stroller you'll want to test drive

It's one of the biggest baby related purchases they will make, so it makes sense that parents-to-be get a chance to road test a stroller.

Pregnancy announcement shows the reality of IVF

It's a long way from baby booties or bump shots people have become accustomed to in social media pregnancy announcements.  

Soleil Moon Frye welcomes fourth baby

"Punky Brewster" is a mom again, for the fourth time. Soleil Moon Frye announced the birth of her baby boy, Story, on Instagram Wednesday.

Mum breastfeeds baby found abandoned on the street

A woman has been praised as a "beautiful mother" after breastfeeding a baby which had been abandoned at the side of a street. 

A birth with a difference: the 'natural caesarean'

We've shared stories of gentle caesareans before, but a new video shows a new option called a 'natural caesarean'.

Baby name inspiration by music genre

If you're all about the music, then you'll need a musical name for that baby. We've got all the lists for you by music genre.

Giving effective instructions to toddlers

One of the most common errors made by parents is in how they give instructions to their children.

 
Advertisement
 

Top 5 Articles

Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

The babies who are one in 70 million

Bethani Webb was excited to find out she was pregnant, but the first time mum did not realise she was carrying four babies not one.

Cafe offers breastfeeding mums a free cup of tea

A Sydney cafe is offering breastfeeding mums free cups of tea in a bid to show support for the right of women to nurse their babies wherever they choose.

To snip or not to snip? When the decision is not clear cut

Jamie Oliver, who considered a vasectomy, is to be a father again. A fellow dad reflects on his own decision 11 years ago

Doctors stunned by rare twins born almost six weeks apart

To everyone's surprise, Kristen Miller "kept doing better each day", keeping her second baby safe.

Baby book ideas for modern parents

Before my son was born I was given a lovely baby book full of blank pages waiting to be filled with weights and heights and first words.

The adorable smile of a baby seeing his mum clearly for the first time

There is no doubt seeing their child smile for the first time is an unforgettable moment for parents everywhere.

Mum tells how toddler 'nearly hung himself' in cot mishap

When Alison Johnson put her 18-month-old Caleb down for a nap, she had no reason to believe her son was in any danger.

Babies are still switched at birth? Yes, it can happen

All my panic and tears aside, my biggest question looking back is about the kind of security measures used in the maternity ward.

Doctors slammed for taking selfie with newborn

Everyone who visits a mum in hospital in the days following childbirth wants to get a photo with the new baby.

ergoPouch Twosie Sleepsuit for winter breastfeeding

Finally, there's a way to keep warm while breastfeeding through winter.

Health check: How long does sex 'normally' last?

What to do with this information? My advice would be to try not to think about it during the throes of passion.

When breastfeeding sucks: fixing common problems

From niplash to tight boobs, biting to milk supply issues, Pinky McKay looks at common breastfeeding issues and how to solve them.

10 things I've learnt in my first six months with twins

Six months on we're all still alive, and the more we get to know each other the easier the days become.

Mum's loving kiss leaves baby fighting for life

Kirsty Carrington thought nothing of giving her newborn son a kiss, little did she know it would leave the baby fighting for life.

When doing chores is your new 'me time'

After children, 'me time' looks a little different.

Get going: 14 travel strollers for families on the move

A stroller can make or break travelling with a baby or toddler. Here are 15 great single travel stroller options.

10 ways toddlers are terrific

It always pays to remind yourself of how terrific toddlers can be - they're little like this for such a short time

 

Vintage Toys

The toys of your childhood

Take a trip down memory lane with these vinage and retro toys that you may have had in your childhood or your parent's childhood.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.