Jump to content

You know you are a parent when...
**fluff**


  • Please log in to reply
20 replies to this topic

#1 *concerned*

Posted 15 February 2013 - 08:59 PM

I was just having a shower and when I went to get the shampoo I found a piece of plastic toast from the kids cooking toys in there too. It barely registered, then I realised that it would only not register with a parent and had a chuckle.

So give us your ending to the topic title... other ones I thought of were:

- you hear a noise that wakes you up and instead of thinking "Is someone breaking in?' you think "What's wrong with the baby?"
- Easter is a perfectly legitimate time for the kids to have chocolate for dinner  ph34r.gif

#2 podg

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:03 PM

When there's someone looking into the gap between the bowl and the seat saying ' Look (sister) I think I can see mummy's poo coming!'

#3 Marchioness Flea

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:04 PM

Your husband inserts a disc into this computer and it doesn't work, so he opens the drive thingy and an old credit card comes out.
Our daughter went through a phase of sticking things into slots...heater vents, computer disc drives, you get the picture.

#4 Rach_V

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:07 PM

... you find yourself wandering around the house randomly singing "We're riding in a hellllllliiiiiicopter, the rotor blades go wocka, wocka, wocka, etc etc."

... a trip to the supermarket minus the kids is as good as a trip to any day spa!

... It's NYE and YOU'RE the designated driver for your OWN parents!!!

#5 MintyBiscuit

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:07 PM

You're stupidly proud when one of the first words your child has learned context for is poo

#6 ~Nic~

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:07 PM

QUOTE (*concerned* @ 15/02/2013, 09:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
- Easter is a perfectly legitimate time for the kids to have chocolate for dinner  breakfastph34r.gif



... you know that most mornings, you will need to avoid the lego / matchbox car booby trap that your 3yo has left on the floor next to the bed.

#7 Black Velvet

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:09 PM

You hear a kid call out Mum in the shops and you automatically turn around even when your kids aren't with you.

#8 Mumof32b!

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:10 PM

You hold out your hands to catch vomit without breaking the conversation you are having at the time  sick.gif

#9 Loz07

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:10 PM

You check on your child/baby playing when they stop making noise, not when you can hear them having a whinge/grizzle.... wink.gif

#10 Cranky Kitten

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:11 PM

...you don't bat an eyelid at the statement (accompanied by much gagging and coughing from child) "well, don't stick your foot so far down your throat then!" coming from your husband at bath-time.


Or you open your bag to find your keys, but instead pull out 3 matchbox cars, a tube of teething gel and a half chewed piece of toast before you find them.

#11 *concerned*

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:14 PM

I remembered another one I forgot to add...

- when you can't find your mobile phone and looking in the decorative pot with sticks in it is a legitimate place to look...

#12 iheartu

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:16 PM

You rock an imaginary infant, while standing in a shop/cafe/pub.

All manner of poo talk is normal.

10pm is a late night.







#13 opethmum

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:21 PM

Poo does not scare you no matter how it is presented.

When you hear a child cry you think "thank goodness it's not mine" and when it is "oh gosh damn it"

The fifteen minute conversation you have with your DD why daddy/mummy does not need help with going to the toilet results in being told by said child that you like cleaning up pooey nappies.

When you do not require weight measures any more because you compare them to your child's size.

When getting to bed before 8:30 is a good night.

When you are at work/anywhere sans child humming the tunes of your child's toys and their favourite songs.

#14 Alacritous~Andy

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:22 PM

QUOTE (iheartu @ 15/02/2013, 09:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You rock an imaginary infant, while standing in a shop/cafe/pub.

All manner of poo talk is normal.

10pm is a late night.


I caught myself patting the "bottom" of a bag of flour while waiting at the checkout once.

#15 ~Mintie~

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:23 PM

- when you have had poo floating in your bath (thanks bath buddy!)
- when you've had milky snot drip into your mouth ( holding baby up above my head, wriggling him about and obviously not enough attention to detail..)

#16 alxase

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:30 PM

Packing for a holiday becomes a week long ordeal with several lists involved and you still forget something.
You haven't added a photo of yourself on Facebook since you became a mum but you have clogged up everyone's news feed with a bazillion photos of your kids.

#17 dogma

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:37 PM

When you wake up with one arm and one leg hanging off the side of the bed while your pint sized sleeping partner is spreadeagled across 7/8ths of it... When you're so used to listening to the Wiggles that you have it on even when by yourself... When you'll sing and dance on a public street to entertain same pint sized poppet... When you hear yourself saying "we are not going to the park unless you put your knickers on"...

#18 surprizzzed

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:38 PM

You need to go to the toilet and you automatically start walking to the parent's room at the shopping centre even though you're alone (I did this today!)

#19 FlamingoG

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:42 PM

When you find yourself complimenting the 'good farting' going on.

And when internet shopping is all about finding baby clothes not handbags.

#20 Flaxen

Posted 15 February 2013 - 09:49 PM

Having your child sleep through the night is a godsend, but strangely annoying too, because you still wake up at the usual times they wake up, then cant get back to sleep cause you are thinking, "any minute now, any minute now...."  (It took a good two weeks of DD sleeping through the night before i stopped waking up myself.)




When out and about, the smell of a pooey nappy fills you with dread and you secretly hope its your friends child who needs changing, not yours  ph34r.gif


The back seat of your car is unrecognisable- and slightly resembles the toybox thats coincidentally empty, with the addition of kicked-off tiny shoes, socks and and the half eaten bit of toast from yesterday.

Getting excited over shoe shopping is no longer related to a new pair of heels on sale, rather a pair of functional childrens shoes, in the right size, and costing less than your last petrol reciept.

#21 ~nikki~

Posted 16 February 2013 - 02:10 AM

When your in a hotel for a romantic night without the kids, take of your bra to get in the spa and a dummy falls out!




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Tell us what you think

to WIN 1 of 2 $500 Coles/Myer gift cards

Dealing with a toddler's morning tantrums

Your schedule is not important to your two-year-old, and you cannot convince her otherwise. So what can you do?

Child in suitcase 'could have died eight years ago'

A child whose remains were dumped in a suitcase in the South Australian bush is believed to have been a girl aged between two-and-a-half to four.

MP breastfeeds baby during parliamentary session

An Argentinian mum and politician has caused a stir on social media after being filmed breastfeeding her baby.

My baby's first seizure

It was 1am on a cold winter's night when I woke suddenly to the screams of my 12-month-old son. Our lives were about to change forever.

Portable pools 'more dangerous than permanent ones'

Inflatable and portable children's pools may be required to be sold with compulsory fencing to prevent backyard drownings, with some experts even floating the idea of a ban.

Heartbreaking moment mum kisses her one-week-old goodbye

At 11.07am on April 2 this year, Sarah Marriott welcomed baby Sebastian into the world.

The amazing Tee Pee bed and kid-friendly Frankie Bunk bed

These kids' beds definitely fit the brief of providing personality and personal space for little people who are moving up in the world.

The funny things kids say when you're pregnant

Since becoming noticeably pregnant, my son has taken more of an interest in the sibling he'll soon have.

The real problem with having one child

In this age of political correctness, it seems the one subject still subject to discrimination is that of the Only Child.

Six-week-old baby found dead, believed stabbed

A neighbour heard a child screaming before a baby was found dead, believed to have been stabbed, in a house in Newcastle.

The fire hazard in more than 70,000 Australian homes

So far, 206 Samsung washing machines have caught fire and some have exploded. But many remain in people's homes.

How having a baby can bring on OCD

We all know that having a baby can turn your life upside down - and it can also bring a raft of new anxieties and worries.

IVF gender selection being considered for Australian parents

Couples using IVF may be able to choose the gender of their babies and women could be financially compensated for donating their eggs.

The best age to get married (according to the latest study)

Not too young, and not too old. That's reportedly the best age to get married. Not everyone agrees.

Yes, you can get pregnant before your period returns post-baby

After giving birth, the last thing you want to think about is contraception. But you can get pregnant before your period comes back.

Fellow diner rewards mum after toddler's tantrum

Parents of toddlers everywhere know the feeling. After working up the courage to take your child out for lunch or dinner in public you are rewarded with a mid-meal meltdown. 

IKEA begins massive safety campaign after two toddler deaths

Two children were killed when pieces from their Malm furniture line tipped over.

Beaneasy: sweet nursery furniture with a twist

If you're looking to introduce an organic element into your baby's nursery but want to step away from natural timber, we have the perfect alternative.

A dad's guide to hyperemesis

I am in no way qualified to advise women on how to cope with hyperemesis, but I've learnt some lessons that might be worth sharing with other partners.

Woman adopts best friend's four daughters after cancer tragedy

Best friends share everything - and for these two life-long friends, that includes family.

Baby Leo's mum excluded from $500K trust 'for her own protection'

Samuel Forrest didn't want his wife as a trustee of their baby Leo's half million dollar trust for her own "protection", it has emerged.

Confirmed: men gain weight when they become dads

Men who become fathers experience weight gain and an increase in body mass index, a measurement of body fat based on height and weight, according to a new, large-scale study

Carer investigated over washing machine photo posted 'for a laugh'

She said the photo of a boy with Down syndrome in a washing machine was taken just for fun, but no one else was laughing.

Mum's premature labour nightmare after high tea salmonella outbreak

An opulent high tea at a luxury Melbourne hotel has left 44 people with salmonella poisoning - including a pregnant woman, who went into early labour.

The day my son started a fire

Would you know what to do in a fire emergency? How safe is your home and family?

Prince George celebrates second birthday

Prince George's second birthday has been marked by the release of an official picture showing the toddler smiling as he is held by his proud beaming father.

Which beauty treatments are safe in pregnancy?

Is it safe to use fake tan, hair dye and nail varnish during pregnancy?

The five ways I know my 'baby' is no longer a baby

The truth is, I can no longer deny that my walking, babbling, somewhat-independent little miss is no longer a bona fide 'baby'.

Review: Cybex Platinum PRIAM pram

I'm not usually one who believes in love at first sight but that's exactly what happened when I first saw the Cybex PRIAM.

Get your FREE Baby & Toddler Show ticket!

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Tell us what you think

to WIN 1 of 2 $500 Coles/Myer gift cards

Why I'm choosing to be a single mother right from the start

I believe that you get out of families what you put into them, and I will give mine my all.

Mother and baby units are a necessity for mental health, not a luxury

I have had two postnatal psychotic episodes. The first when my eldest child was six weeks old, and another after my second child was born.

30 French baby names

French names are always in fashion, but a few have risen in popularity in recent years.

New mum's Spanish maternity nightmare

A British woman who gave birth in Spain has told of her ordeal after spending weeks trying to convince medics the baby girl was hers.

Preparing Rover to be a good dog with baby

Some friends of ours say that it's dangerous to have a dog around a newborn and that we should start looking for a new home for him. Is it?

Company offers to ship working mums' breast milk home

First Apple and Facebook announced they would pay $20,000 towards the cost of their female employees freezing their eggs, now IBM in the US has come up with an innovative new policy aimed at retaining female employees.

Prince William speaks of his pride at wife Kate and 'little joy of heaven' Charlotte

The Duke of Cambridge opened up about family life and his plans for the future in an interview to mark his first day as an air ambulance pilot.

'Glowing' eye saves baby Mason's life

A simple photo taken in front of an evening fire gave new mother Sarah Bowers the power to save her baby's life. 

Parenting and decision overload

Of all the advice people told me before having a baby, no one warned me about the amount of decisions involved.

Proof that toddlers can't be left unsupervised - ever

Parents of toddlers all know the moment when realise your child is being suspiciously quiet. It can only mean one thing - trouble!

Meet Jeremy Ryan, The Voice contestant with seven kids

If you have trouble recalling the ages of Jeremy Ryan's seven children on The Voice, you're not alone. So does he.

Baby's adorable reaction to wearing glasses for the first time

Getting glasses can be a formative moment in a person's life.

Police officer buys supplies for family after mum of six caught shoplifting

When a mum of six was caught shoplifting nappies, clothes and shoes for her kids, the last thing she expected was for a stranger to pay for her haul.

Why pregnant women on antidepressants shouldn’t panic about birth defect claims

The risk of having uncontrolled depression is far greater than the small increased risk of birth defects that may be associated with specific antidepressants.

Arrests made over children's birthday party brawl

Police have raided properties and arrested a number of people over a brawl at a child's birthday party at a play centre in Sydney's west.

Family shares awesome drone baby announcement

Looking for a creative way to share some big news? Look to the skies, like this family did.

Young warrior Owen defies doctors' predictions

Little Owen DiCandilo's name means "young warrior", and it's a description that perfectly fits the inspiring 18-month-old

Advice for dads: when to approach your wife for sex

The exhaustion that comes with caring for young children often means romance between parents becomes a thing of the past.

I might be fat, but I don't need saving

I've been fat for pretty much most of life, besides a few crazy moments of being less-fat, but for the most part I've existed on this earth with a little more meat on my bones than desirable.

The rookie mistakes we make as parents

Since the dawn of civilisation, generation after generation of new parents have had to rely on instinct, trial and error - and sometimes get it wrong.

 

FREE TICKET

See Pinky McKay live in Sydney

Get your free ticket to The Essential Baby & Toddler Show and save $20 - register online now!

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.