Help needed for ASD teenager
How do you remove facial hair
, Feb 14 2013 11:39 AM
10 replies to this topic
Posted 14 February 2013 - 11:39 AM
This is not my usual stomping ground, and I am posting on behalf of a friend who has an ASD grandson who recently turned 13. If I am in the wrong section could a moderator please shift me over.
Nutshell background. This young man's mother died from brain cancer when he was about 8, his father works full time and the boy goes to a special school and has aids whilst there. Family and friends fill in any child care gaps and his paternal grandmother has him staying with her quite often. The maternal side don't have much to do with him at all and never have, not even when their daughter was alive, or when she was too sick to look after herself never mind her son. Their choice, that's fine.
Recently he has entered puberty, and although he has taken under arm hair and pubic hair in his stride, facial hair is something else entirely. He doesn't like it, he doesn't want it, BUT he won't let his father or grandmother anywhere near him with a razor. An epilady type shaver has been suggested, but he really doesn't like or want anyone touching his face. Neither plucking nor laser treatment are options, and we are not sure what his reaction to waxing would be. So, does anyone out there in EB land have a suggestion as to how this could be resolved?
Posted 14 February 2013 - 11:48 AM
If he can't deal with the facial hair and the like perhaps under a guidance of a gp/paed specialist have him sedated or given medication to ease his anxiety and then remove unwanted hair with view to letting him do it himself so he can have control over that in the future.
Good luck and I hope that this process can be easier over time.
Posted 14 February 2013 - 11:54 AM
Along the lines of opethmum's post, is it possible to combine sedation with the more permanent removal options out there?
Obviously done with direct consultation with medical professionals.
Posted 14 February 2013 - 12:00 PM
Can he use and electric razor and do it himself? I'm assuming he only has ASD and no other motor control issues.
Posted 14 February 2013 - 12:08 PM
My cousin is ASD in a group home he shaves with an electric shaver he also lost his Mum my Aunt is now married to his dad and he calls her Mum. He is 33
Posted 14 February 2013 - 12:10 PM
I'd get a psych involved to help him work through the anxiety and an OT to help with the practicalities of how to shave.
I think it is outrageous to consider permanent hair removal unless you have done everything possible and he is still distressed. Permanent hair removal is permanent and altering his body permanently for what may well be a temporary problem is not right.
Posted 14 February 2013 - 12:10 PM
VioletRose - I am an aspie and sometimes there are huge sensory issues to overcome and the machines coming at you can be so overwhelming and then there is the sensations of the hairs coming out and that can be so huge hurdles to overcome. I can on occasion can feel the removal of hair even in the shower with my razor it is freakish, so I can empathise with this teens distress.
Posted 14 February 2013 - 12:15 PM
Thank you everyone, I'll suggest those things to my friend.
He does have other issues, including anxiety and motor control, but his mother allowed him to have/do or eat anything he wanted (he lived for years on chips and fish fingers), so his boundaries were never challenged. It has been a long hard road getting him to accept anything new, and bribery has played a large part in that. Fortunately he is quite open to straight out 'if you do x then you can have y' type of bribery, but that hasn't worked for this. I'll pass along your suggestions and see how it goes.
Thank you again.
Posted 14 February 2013 - 05:58 PM
Not sure where you are,but your friend may be interested in this Asperger's Syndrome in the teens
You might also cross post this in the special needs area, for more help.
Posted 14 February 2013 - 07:04 PM
Posted 14 February 2013 - 07:56 PM
Trouble with facial hair is that it is so fast growing and thick he needs something he can deal with on a daily basis eventually (so creams and waxing probably isnt going to work).
I would suggest getting the school involved, they have probably had plenty of experience with other teen boys with the same issue and part of his education would involve teaching him self care skills and life skills (also generally the kids are more receptive to a teacher or aide assisting them with this than they would with a parent/family member who they are more likely to resist against). An electric razor, probably one that uses batteries rather than having to be plugged in (reduce the risk of a mishap with powerpoints or water) and using social stories to introduce him slowly and gently to the idea, to be able to feel the razor maybe on his hand for short periods so he can feel the buzzing, without it being near his face, having a male family member, friend or teacher show him how they shave with the same type of razor.
Just suggestions, my ASD child is a girl, my NT DS has only just started shaving at 15 and he uses an electric razor, much quicker and easier than dealing with razors and shaving cream.
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