Jump to content

Outgoing messages


  • Please log in to reply
20 replies to this topic

#1 unicorn

Posted 13 February 2013 - 10:37 AM

Mine is going to be very boring, something like "Hi this is blah & blah, phone is unattended at the moment, leave a message or ring the mobile" type thing. We receive phone calls from general members of the public for DH's business and other things so it needs to be concise and easy to understand.
I think those messages that are along the lines of "hi you have reached (male voice says male name), (female voice says female name) and (child voice says child's name) and our pets rufus, moggie and tweety bird" or "hello, hello can you hear me, oh yeah answering machine" are really naff.
What does your OGM say?

#2 FeralFerretOfDoom

Posted 13 February 2013 - 11:45 AM

Ahhhh... memories.

Our message these days is very mundane, but when I was a uni student 20-odd years ago, living with my sister, we had a message that said:

"Hello, I'm the answering machine. At the moment (Ferret's sister) is a microscopic speck contemplating the vast entirely of the universe, while (Ferret) is having an in-depth conversation with a teapot. Please leave a message and one of them will get back to you just as soon as the phone stops thinking it's a hedgehog."

We got a number of messages that were just hysterical laughter.

Edited by FemboFerretOfDoom, 13 February 2013 - 11:46 AM.


#3 WhimsicalDragonfly

Posted 13 February 2013 - 11:47 AM

roll2.gif

#4 niggles

Posted 13 February 2013 - 11:52 AM

My phone says "Hello. Your call cannot be answered at the moment and you cannot leave a message."

So bascially the person gets charged for a phone call for no good reason. It's a nightmare but I've read the manual a million times and I cannot figure out how to turn the normal "Please leave a message after the beep" back on again.

#5 Ireckon

Posted 13 February 2013 - 11:53 AM

Much like Ferret's, we had one that said ( before we ever had kids etc)

" uh...this is the toaster. The answering machine has just left.....Not sure where it went...but if you leave a message, I'll try and get it to the toast makers"

MIL made a point of telling us how stupid it was. She was not my biggest fan when DH and I were just dating.

Our best one was one we did whilst having a party. The whole crowd yelled out
"WE'RE NOT HERE! lEAVE A MESSAGE!"



#6 unicorn

Posted 13 February 2013 - 11:56 AM

laughing2.gif

#7 Country (deci)Mel

Posted 13 February 2013 - 12:03 PM

I'm sure I got a share house once simply because my name would help to make the stupid wacky answering machine message sound better!

Unfortunately for the message maker my friends would leave messages that would start with a sigh and often then continue with "Hasn't that idiot tired of that lame a*sed joke yet?"

Later in that house a different flatmate installed one of those 'commander systems' that he'd scored from somewhere he used to love, love, love transferring calls (had put an extension in EVERY room in the house!) and placing callers on hold - an IT nerd who moved in (oh OK it was DP!) hacked it so that it would give little 'Your call is important to us' messages - but we also recorded a little 'hold muzak' that if you listened closely was actually a very rude song about the telephone obsessive!

Happy days!

I have neither an answering machine nor the telstra thingy now, and our phoneline infrastructure is such that I don't even get the 'someone else is calling you' beeps.

#8 MissNess

Posted 13 February 2013 - 12:08 PM

My OGM on my mobile is

Sorry I can't get your call but if you leave your name, number and a short message and a reason to call you back I'll get back to you. No, "I'm your mother" is not a good reason.

I'm so sick of people who prefer to call back 4 or 5 times in a matter of minutes without leaving a message or leaving vague "Call me" messages when they do bother. I need to know how to prioritise my return call.

#9 Country (deci)Mel

Posted 13 February 2013 - 12:21 PM

QUOTE (~*Twilight~Zone*~ @ 13/02/2013, 01:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Years ago we had a very tacky song on our answering machine.

It went

"hey how ya doing, sorry ya can't get through why doncha ya leave ya name -n- your number -n- we'll get back to you"


De La Soul - yeah!



#10 kpingitquiet

Posted 13 February 2013 - 12:24 PM

I'm never motivated to change mine from the computer-generated stock msg. So yep.

#11 fillesetjumeaux

Posted 13 February 2013 - 02:13 PM

I've just recently changed mine - the old one dated from when the boys were crawling, and would disappear with the handset:

"Hi, we can't find the handset to take your call right now.  Darcy and Leo have probably hidden it.  If you leave a message, we'll get back to you as soon as we find it."

Now it's just "Hi, you've reached the Fillesetjumeaux family.  We can't take your call right now, but if you leave a message, we'll get back to you as soon as we can."

#12 Bluenomi

Posted 13 February 2013 - 02:19 PM

I may or may not have had part of a Def Leppard song as my message at one stage  wwhistle.gif To be fair the lyrics were an answering machine message  biggrin.gif

These days I have the boring 'I can't take your call right now, leave a message' style recording.

#13 Jadeerebecca

Posted 13 February 2013 - 02:20 PM

Mine is just the usual now but i have a friend who tricks you..
she says helloo (how she normally does) then goes on to say she cant hear you.
Meanwhile i fall for it almost everytime. At the end she laughs and says to leave a message.

#14 Banana Pancakes

Posted 13 February 2013 - 02:22 PM

QUOTE
Years ago we had a very tacky song on our answering machine.

It went

"hey how ya doing, sorry ya can't get through why doncha ya leave ya name -n- your number -n- we'll get back to you"


We had this as well but my Father made my sister and I sing it. Oh the shame  blush.gif , he thought it was hilarious.

This is my favourite answering machine message ever!

Edited by Banana Pancakes, 13 February 2013 - 02:22 PM.


#15 elizabethany

Posted 13 February 2013 - 03:04 PM

When I was young and silly I had this, now I just have a random british dude that came with the phone.  Freaks out the randoms, as it is NOTHING like me or DH.

#16 mummygirl

Posted 13 February 2013 - 03:14 PM

Ours used to be

"Hi, we are probably home. If you are a telemarketer, p*ss off!! Everyone else, leave a message and if we are home we will pick up or call you back soon"

#17 Mummy Em

Posted 13 February 2013 - 03:14 PM

When I was in student housing the boys used to often answer the phone with smart intros such "city morgue- you stab 'em, slab 'em."

#18 Bubblicious

Posted 13 February 2013 - 03:25 PM

QUOTE (Mummy Em @ 13/02/2013, 04:14 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
When I was in student housing the boys used to often answer the phone with smart intros such "city morgue- you stab 'em, slab 'em."


When under the influence of alcohol whilst living in a share house, I would answer the phone with one of these:

Bobs BBQ, you kill em, we grill em
Penrith morgue, you kill em, we chill em

Or the one that got the most laughs, simply saying

Telephone!

My message now is stock standard and boring

#19 Zephie Chugger

Posted 13 February 2013 - 04:43 PM

I've changed my some many times.....

Hi, I'm out having a life call my mobile on ##### if you would like to join me or leave a message if you have don't have my mobile  (in my 20's)

another, People I'm working call back when I'm home after 6pm

Dam I missed your call I need to talk to you please call again

Sorry cant hear you I must be asleep  leave a message if you are awake

and so on I hardly returned people messages.

Now  stock standard and boring and I call people back original.gif

My mobile once said  Zephie phone is in her pocket when she finds out you called she will call you back love (my partner)





#20 Lickety Split

Posted 13 February 2013 - 04:55 PM

Mine currently says "No I haven't had the baby yet. If you are calling for another reason, please leave a message."

#21 chickenpants

Posted 13 February 2013 - 07:04 PM

I have had to start ours off with our phone #

"You have reached [phone number].  [Name] and [Name] can't take your call at the moment so please leave a message."

I tried so many variations - our number appears to be very similar to that of a local dentist, so we came home quite often to messages about wanting to book appointments, 'I broke my tooth can I come in tomorrow', 'I won't be able to make my appointment can I reschedule' and so on.

Now that the numbers come first the random messages have decreased.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

RPA hospital contacting mums after discovering vaccine storage fault

Sydney's Royal Prince Alfred Hospital (RPA) is trying to contact women who had babies at the facility after discovering a fault in a refrigerator containing vaccines.

'Nutella' not a baby name, French court says

A French court has blocked parents from naming their baby girl after the hazelnut spread Nutella, arguing it would make her the target of mockery.

Why I'm never calling myself 'just a mum' again

I’ve grown three human beings. I feed them, dress them, teach them, care for them and love them 24 hours a day. Yet for eight years, when I meet new people and they’ve asked me what I do, I tell them: “I’m just a mum”.

Rosie Batty named 2015 Australian of the Year

One year ago, Rosie Batty could not have imagined she'd be where she is. Tonight the grieving mum who put domestic violence on the national agenda was named Australian of the Year.

Five reasons to hug more

Hugging – some of us thrive on it, even depend on it – and then there are those who don't care for it really. So, are they missing out?

Help - my three-year-old has started throwing tantrums

My daughter never went through the "terrible twos" but began throwing wild tantrums shortly after her third birthday.

That's commitment

First peek at Sonia Kruger's daughter Maggie

"She smells so good, I could eat her," Kruger tells co-host David Campbell.

Mum assists in own caesarean surgery

A mum who partly delivered her own twins during a caesarean has encouraged other women to take control of their birthing experience.

How to handle common childhood regressions

Regression can be a natural and common part of development prompted by a variety of factors, but that doesn't make it less frustrating.

Disgruntled dad's pram ad goes viral

When buying a second hand pram, there are lots of things to take into consideration. 

Man discovers he's a dad after finding 55-year-old letter

Discovering you are about to father a baby is startling enough - never mind finding out you have a 61-year-old son.

15 thoughts mums have during a tantrum

Ranging from mild to feral and triggered by events both minor and major, tantrums certainly keep life interesting.

Natural pain relief in the early stages of labour

While managing labour pains on your own can be daunting, there are a number of natural pain relief options to help you cope until you are admitted to hospital.

Forgotten Baby Syndrome claims the life of toddler

One baby dies every eight days in the back of a car in the US, victims of 'forgotten baby syndrome'.

For a brief time, I was touched by an angel

For a brief time, I was touched by an angel. You stole my heart, and changed me into the women I am today.

Chrissie Swan has reached her "sex quota"

Chrissie Swan says she and her partner have sex once a year due to her fear of falling pregnant.

Chinese woman gives birth to quintuplets

After six years of trying for a baby, a couple’s dreams have come true many times over after the mum gave birth to quintuplets this week.

Five-year-old shoots nine-month-old brother dead

A nine-month-old baby boy died on Monday after he was shot in the head by his five-year-old brother in their grandfather's home.

'Is that baby yours?'

She is my daughter. I gave birth to her. I nurse her. But she doesn't have any of my genes.

Episiotomy in childbirth: not just 'a little snip'

Episiotomies have a place in maternity care – and can occasionally save lives – but should not be performed routinely.

Win an Octonauts prize pack

To celebrate the launch of Octonauts Live! Operation Reef Shield, a spectacular underwater adventure live on stage, we are giving away an amazing Octonauts prize pack to one lucky fan.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Stars help save choking babies

It's an important lesson to learn, but one that busy new mums and dads might overlook until it's too late.

New Girl star Zooey Deschanel pregnant

Actress Zooey Deschanel is expecting her first child with her producer boyfriend Jacob Pechenik.

16 times 'dad reflexes' saved the day

Of course, in some cases they may be the ones who actually got their child into a precarious position in the first place, but we'll ignore that for now.

Couple's 'non-traditional' pregnancy announcement goes viral

Knowing you are not the father of your pregnant wife's baby would usually indicate a rocky relationship ahead for traditional parents.

The trials and tribulations of identical triplet newborns

Pip Donnelly is still playing spot the difference with her newborn identical triplets, Isabelle, Georgina and Frankie.

Win an Octonauts prize pack

To celebrate the launch of Octonauts Live! Operation Reef Shield, a spectacular underwater adventure live on stage, we are giving away an amazing Octonauts prize pack to one lucky fan.

Earthquake baby thriving five years on

Jenny Alexis is lucky to be alive after spending four days buried in the rubble of the 2010 Haitian earthquake, but now she's a thriving five year old.

Please don't say I'm lucky because I was adopted

On the one hand I was having a regular life with friends and sports and sleepovers and school. But I was also always wondering: Did my mother love me? What was wrong with me?

An open letter to non-parents who offer advice on child-rearing

Kitty, when you’re the parent of my child you’re welcome to wade in with an opinion – but until then, I’d prefer you to have a supportive ear and a glass of wine ready.

Couple arrested over baby gun video

A US couple faces charges after investigators say they found mobile phone videos showing the woman's 12-month-old daughter putting a handgun in her mouth.

NSW Health dumps 10-year limit on frozen embryos

A 10-year time limit on storing frozen embryos that were created with donor sperm has been dropped by the NSW government.

How my happy-go-lucky husband became a monster

Sharan Nicholson-Rogers watched her husband change from a happy-go-lucky police officer into an unpredictable man prone to violent and emotional outbursts.

Dads-to-be experience hormonal changes, too

Dads-to-be experience hormonal changes in line with their pregnant partners, a new study shows.

'They were just doing their job': mum of toddler killed in police chase gone wrong

"They were just doing their job. I feel so sorry for them. It is all just too sad."

Miscarriages to be formally recognised by NSW government

Women who miscarry will be able to obtain an optional "recognition of loss" certificate as a formal recognition of their often heartbreaking loss.

Cafe cubby house 'too noisy' for neighbours

Teenage parties, domestic disputes, or raucous late night pubs are the things that usually come to mind when you think neighbourhood noise complaints.

Dad films baby playing with snake

Most parents would not consider a snake an appropriate playmate for their baby, but a US dad who filmed his daughter playing with a python has defended himself against criticism.

Clever breastfeeding products

Check out this range of products designed to help make your breastfeeding journey more enjoyable, manageable and convenient.

 

Back to School Offer

Findababysitter.com.au

We've got you covered for this school year. Use www.findababysitter.com.au to meet local nannies now.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.