Jump to content

Outgoing messages


  • Please log in to reply
20 replies to this topic

#1 unicorn

Posted 13 February 2013 - 10:37 AM

Mine is going to be very boring, something like "Hi this is blah & blah, phone is unattended at the moment, leave a message or ring the mobile" type thing. We receive phone calls from general members of the public for DH's business and other things so it needs to be concise and easy to understand.
I think those messages that are along the lines of "hi you have reached (male voice says male name), (female voice says female name) and (child voice says child's name) and our pets rufus, moggie and tweety bird" or "hello, hello can you hear me, oh yeah answering machine" are really naff.
What does your OGM say?

#2 FeralFerretOfDoom

Posted 13 February 2013 - 11:45 AM

Ahhhh... memories.

Our message these days is very mundane, but when I was a uni student 20-odd years ago, living with my sister, we had a message that said:

"Hello, I'm the answering machine. At the moment (Ferret's sister) is a microscopic speck contemplating the vast entirely of the universe, while (Ferret) is having an in-depth conversation with a teapot. Please leave a message and one of them will get back to you just as soon as the phone stops thinking it's a hedgehog."

We got a number of messages that were just hysterical laughter.

Edited by FemboFerretOfDoom, 13 February 2013 - 11:46 AM.


#3 WhimsicalDragonfly

Posted 13 February 2013 - 11:47 AM

roll2.gif

#4 niggles

Posted 13 February 2013 - 11:52 AM

My phone says "Hello. Your call cannot be answered at the moment and you cannot leave a message."

So bascially the person gets charged for a phone call for no good reason. It's a nightmare but I've read the manual a million times and I cannot figure out how to turn the normal "Please leave a message after the beep" back on again.

#5 Ireckon

Posted 13 February 2013 - 11:53 AM

Much like Ferret's, we had one that said ( before we ever had kids etc)

" uh...this is the toaster. The answering machine has just left.....Not sure where it went...but if you leave a message, I'll try and get it to the toast makers"

MIL made a point of telling us how stupid it was. She was not my biggest fan when DH and I were just dating.

Our best one was one we did whilst having a party. The whole crowd yelled out
"WE'RE NOT HERE! lEAVE A MESSAGE!"



#6 unicorn

Posted 13 February 2013 - 11:56 AM

laughing2.gif

#7 CountryFeral

Posted 13 February 2013 - 12:03 PM

I'm sure I got a share house once simply because my name would help to make the stupid wacky answering machine message sound better!

Unfortunately for the message maker my friends would leave messages that would start with a sigh and often then continue with "Hasn't that idiot tired of that lame a*sed joke yet?"

Later in that house a different flatmate installed one of those 'commander systems' that he'd scored from somewhere he used to love, love, love transferring calls (had put an extension in EVERY room in the house!) and placing callers on hold - an IT nerd who moved in (oh OK it was DP!) hacked it so that it would give little 'Your call is important to us' messages - but we also recorded a little 'hold muzak' that if you listened closely was actually a very rude song about the telephone obsessive!

Happy days!

I have neither an answering machine nor the telstra thingy now, and our phoneline infrastructure is such that I don't even get the 'someone else is calling you' beeps.

#8 MissNess

Posted 13 February 2013 - 12:08 PM

My OGM on my mobile is

Sorry I can't get your call but if you leave your name, number and a short message and a reason to call you back I'll get back to you. No, "I'm your mother" is not a good reason.

I'm so sick of people who prefer to call back 4 or 5 times in a matter of minutes without leaving a message or leaving vague "Call me" messages when they do bother. I need to know how to prioritise my return call.

#9 CountryFeral

Posted 13 February 2013 - 12:21 PM

QUOTE (~*Twilight~Zone*~ @ 13/02/2013, 01:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Years ago we had a very tacky song on our answering machine.

It went

"hey how ya doing, sorry ya can't get through why doncha ya leave ya name -n- your number -n- we'll get back to you"


De La Soul - yeah!



#10 kpingitquiet

Posted 13 February 2013 - 12:24 PM

I'm never motivated to change mine from the computer-generated stock msg. So yep.

#11 fillesetjumeaux

Posted 13 February 2013 - 02:13 PM

I've just recently changed mine - the old one dated from when the boys were crawling, and would disappear with the handset:

"Hi, we can't find the handset to take your call right now.  Darcy and Leo have probably hidden it.  If you leave a message, we'll get back to you as soon as we find it."

Now it's just "Hi, you've reached the Fillesetjumeaux family.  We can't take your call right now, but if you leave a message, we'll get back to you as soon as we can."

#12 Bluenomi

Posted 13 February 2013 - 02:19 PM

I may or may not have had part of a Def Leppard song as my message at one stage  wwhistle.gif To be fair the lyrics were an answering machine message  biggrin.gif

These days I have the boring 'I can't take your call right now, leave a message' style recording.

#13 Jadeerebecca

Posted 13 February 2013 - 02:20 PM

Mine is just the usual now but i have a friend who tricks you..
she says helloo (how she normally does) then goes on to say she cant hear you.
Meanwhile i fall for it almost everytime. At the end she laughs and says to leave a message.

#14 Banana Pancakes

Posted 13 February 2013 - 02:22 PM

QUOTE
Years ago we had a very tacky song on our answering machine.

It went

"hey how ya doing, sorry ya can't get through why doncha ya leave ya name -n- your number -n- we'll get back to you"


We had this as well but my Father made my sister and I sing it. Oh the shame  blush.gif , he thought it was hilarious.

This is my favourite answering machine message ever!

Edited by Banana Pancakes, 13 February 2013 - 02:22 PM.


#15 elizabethany

Posted 13 February 2013 - 03:04 PM

When I was young and silly I had this, now I just have a random british dude that came with the phone.  Freaks out the randoms, as it is NOTHING like me or DH.

#16 mummygirl

Posted 13 February 2013 - 03:14 PM

Ours used to be

"Hi, we are probably home. If you are a telemarketer, p*ss off!! Everyone else, leave a message and if we are home we will pick up or call you back soon"

#17 Mummy Em

Posted 13 February 2013 - 03:14 PM

When I was in student housing the boys used to often answer the phone with smart intros such "city morgue- you stab 'em, slab 'em."

#18 Bubblicious

Posted 13 February 2013 - 03:25 PM

QUOTE (Mummy Em @ 13/02/2013, 04:14 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
When I was in student housing the boys used to often answer the phone with smart intros such "city morgue- you stab 'em, slab 'em."


When under the influence of alcohol whilst living in a share house, I would answer the phone with one of these:

Bobs BBQ, you kill em, we grill em
Penrith morgue, you kill em, we chill em

Or the one that got the most laughs, simply saying

Telephone!

My message now is stock standard and boring

#19 Zephie Chugger

Posted 13 February 2013 - 04:43 PM

I've changed my some many times.....

Hi, I'm out having a life call my mobile on ##### if you would like to join me or leave a message if you have don't have my mobile  (in my 20's)

another, People I'm working call back when I'm home after 6pm

Dam I missed your call I need to talk to you please call again

Sorry cant hear you I must be asleep  leave a message if you are awake

and so on I hardly returned people messages.

Now  stock standard and boring and I call people back original.gif

My mobile once said  Zephie phone is in her pocket when she finds out you called she will call you back love (my partner)





#20 Lickety Split

Posted 13 February 2013 - 04:55 PM

Mine currently says "No I haven't had the baby yet. If you are calling for another reason, please leave a message."

#21 chickenpants

Posted 13 February 2013 - 07:04 PM

I have had to start ours off with our phone #

"You have reached [phone number].  [Name] and [Name] can't take your call at the moment so please leave a message."

I tried so many variations - our number appears to be very similar to that of a local dentist, so we came home quite often to messages about wanting to book appointments, 'I broke my tooth can I come in tomorrow', 'I won't be able to make my appointment can I reschedule' and so on.

Now that the numbers come first the random messages have decreased.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Special offer: The Baby & Toddler Show 2014

At The Baby & Toddler Show, you?ll find everything you need to get ready for your new arrival and guide you through the early weeks and years of parenting.

An open letter to Tony Abbott: please salvage our super

We face financial ruin, but most of us don?t realise it. If we don?t act together to salvage our superannuation, I have no doubt the new GFC will be the Girls? Financial Crisis.

'I'm happy to know I'm changing lives': surrogate mum of two

I know that once the baby is born, I will focus on the gift I have given, and watch the parents with their new child. I can't wait for that day.

Birth trauma and the issue of informed consent

There is a perception that women should just be happy they have a healthy baby in their arms. But for women who experienced birth trauma, there's a lot more to it.

Tips for managing pollen allergies and hayfever

They're simple tips, but they can have a big impact on those who suffer from hayfever and pollen allergies.

Ada Nicodemou shares tribute to her stillborn baby

Just over one month since Ada Nicodemou and her husband lost their second son, the Home and Away star has shared a touching poem for her baby.

Mum causes stir breastfeeding on train

?To the woman breastfeeding her kid on the train. Seriously! On the train?" began the letter of complaint.

10 things they don?t tell you about being pregnant

As I slowly waddle my ever-changing pregnant body towards the finishing line of my due date, it?s becoming increasingly clear there are a lot of things they just don?t tell you about pregnancy.

Overcoming a fear of the dark

A toddler's fear of the dark is very normal, but there are ways parents can help children through this stage in their development.

Kids, TV and movies: how young is too young?

It seems you don't have to throw the TV and iPad out the window - it all boils down to moderation, supervision and interaction.

Video: Baby's first birthday is a special day for mum, too

?A baby?s first birthday is also mum?s first birthday.?

The day Supernanny came to tea

Prince William's favourite celebrity child trainer Jo Frost puts Bryony Gordon and her toddler through their paces.

Tales from the homefront

When you're at work you sort of assume that your house is basically just sitting there quietly doing nothing until you return. However, since spending my days at home, I've learned this couldn't be further from the truth.

The words I hated hearing as new mum

It was less than a week after my son was born that I first heard it - from my mother.

To the pharmacist who sold me baby formula

On the rare occasion I catch sight of you at school, or around town, I think back to our earliest exchange. I?m sure you have no recollection of it at all.

Babies may benefit from autism therapy

Children showing signs of autism don't usually receive early intervention until well into toddlerhood or later, but a new study suggests infants with symptoms of the developmental disorder might benefit from therapy from as early as six months.

Knatalye and Adeline born with an everlasting bond

Knatalye Hope and Adeline Faith are a lot like any other identical twin girls, but there is one dramatic difference: they're joined at the chest and shares several internal organs.

The question this dad wishes he'd asked his wife

I should have seen that my wife wasn't the same person I'd fallen in love with, but we were both too focused on simply trying to get by.

Why we should talk about the deaths of the Hunt children

The deaths are too horrible even to think about. Yet we owe it to the children - Fletcher, Mia and Phoebe Hunt - to think long and hard about it all.

Baby dies of meningococcal weeks after vaccine application denied

A six-month-old girl has died from meningococcal disease just weeks after an application for government funding of a vaccine for the most deadly strain of the virus was rejected.

Finding the right balance when playing with your kids

Being too involved in our children?s play and not allowing our kids enough free time for unstructured activities can mean our kids miss out on the value that play offers.

Creative DIY light shades

The Pop Light light shade comes in a flat pack already made - it's up to you to design it as you'd like.

The battle of iParenting versus imagination

Have we forgotten how to be imaginative, resourceful parents?

Why movement is so important for your baby's growth

Letting your child move as much as possible in the early years ? using all senses, engaging in the real world, preferably outside ? will help them grow up healthier, smarter, calmer and stronger.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Special offer: The Baby & Toddler Show 2014

At The Baby & Toddler Show, you?ll find everything you need to get ready for your new arrival and guide you through the early weeks and years of parenting.

Losing yourself to motherhood

While watching your baby grow into a unique little person is exciting and wondrous, the intensity of meeting everyone else?s needs can ever so sneakily overtake your own needs for self-care.

Tearing during delivery: the facts

Almost all women will experience bruising, grazing or tearing after a vaginal birth. Depending on the degree of tearing, there are various treatments available.

6 tips for a day out with a baby and toddler

Outings can be lots of fun with the kids, but there are inevitable challenges. Here's some information about days out to help you be a little more prepared.

Why I invited a dozen people to watch my son's birth

I sent invitations on burgundy scrapbooking paper stamped with a field of poppies, and told each person why I wanted him or her there. I warned that there would be nudity.

Getting labour started: tips for a natural induction

When your baby?s due date comes and goes without so much as a pop - let alone a bang - it can be disheartening. Mums and a doula share their stories of natural inductions.

7 mistakes old hands make with new babies

As I sat across the table from my friend ? me, a seasoned mother of three; her, a brand new mum ? I thought of all the mistakes an old-hand parent can make when visiting a newborn baby.

That's my boy: a dad's diary of the first 4 months

Unbearable anxiety, unspeakable joy, constant exhaustion and bouts of frustration ... The many shocks of first-time fatherhood resound in a dad's diary of his son's early months.

One of the most important things a new mum can do

Finances may not be as cute as a newborn, but with many women?s working arrangements changing post-baby, monetary matters need attention too.

Single, pregnant - and 51

She first became a mum at 49 - now, two years later, Tracey Khan is pregnant with her second child.

Personalised baby gifts

We've scoured the internet to find gorgeous personalised keepsakes and nursery decor to record baby name and dates. They make great gifts for christenings, name days and birthdays! (All prices in AU.)

 

Reader offer

2 FOR 1 TICKET OFFER

For Shopping, For Advice, For Baby & You. Enjoy a special day out with fabulous shopping from over 200 brands, leading parenting experts offering advice on a range of topics, and amazing children?s entertainment

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.