Jump to content

6 week old - resettling at 40 minutes
Deja vu!


  • Please log in to reply
5 replies to this topic

#1 lovedupmumma

Posted 12 February 2013 - 10:10 AM

OK, so DS3 is 6 weeks old today, and I am getting a distinct sense of deja vu.

Goes down fine for a sleep (daytime), then wakes after 40 mins and is really hard to resettle. It look like he's having a fight with his wrap and he grizzles, whimpers and cries. No amount of patting or replacing the dummy settles him, and if I leave him he gets so worked up it takes ages to calm him (ie picking up and rocking). I am hesitant to pick him up straight away like I did with DS1, I try to resettle in the cot, but here he is in my arms as I type.

This happened with DS1 in particular and I think the mistake there was we allowed him to become overstimulated and sleep was a problem for a VERY long time. DS2 was better at this age, but still the same 40 min/ one sleep cycle thing.

So my question is, what are your tips for resettling when they wake at this age but need more sleep? He's too young IMO for letting him cry it out, and that seems to make it worse and go on for longer, but am keen not to have a repeat of past sleep problems. I just have too many people to look after these days for that!

#2 lucky 2

Posted 12 February 2013 - 10:30 AM

At 6 weeks he is at the peak of unsettled behaviour (peaks around 6-8  weeks of age).
Most people are going to say do what you can and do what you need to do, just as you have done, ie he didn't sleep with your strategies so you picked him up, that is the only thing you could have done in the circumstances.
What alternative did you have?
If the only alternative is to ignore his cries/needs (aka crying it out) then you have done the right thing by him by picking him up to comfort him.
He needs that support from his carers until he developmentally ready not to need that support, he is far too immature at the moment.
The link below is pretty extensive and has lots of research based information on baby behaviour and tips/strategies for help with soothing, sleeping and crying.
http://www.purplecrying.info/
All the best.

#3 Lokum

Posted 12 February 2013 - 10:43 AM

Maybe he's grizzling and fighting when he wakes after 40 mins because he HAS had enough sleep and wants to get up and have a cuddle?

My DS1 was a catnapper and had 40 minute sleeps (but lots of them) until about 6-7 months old. He would go to sleep, wake after 40 minutes and want to get up for a feed or play. If we didn't attend to him he'd grizzle, but only because he wanted to get up. Once up, he'd be happy with a cuddle, but we'd try to get him back to bed within an hour or so (longer as he got older.)

After 6  months, he started waking cranky, as he really did need a longer sleep but wasn't able to get through to the next sleep cycle, and then I helped him. I had to lie on the bed next to the cot reading, and at the 35 0\or 40 min mark, as soon as he stirred, I'd scoop him up and cuddle him until he'd got through to the next sleep cycle. When he was sleeping deeply again, then I'd lay him back in the cot. Within a couple of weeks, he was reliably sleeping 2 or 3 sleep cycles by himself and happy again.

But catnapping per se wasn't a problem, only when it became clear that lots of 40 min naps was no longer working for him. Up until 6 months they worked great for him. He was a great sleeper, went to sleep easily and quickly (< 5 minutes) nearly his whole life - but we cuddled him to sleep until he was 18 months old. Is now a brilliant toddler sleeper, in his own bed, never gets out. I don't think self-settling in the cot is necessarily important to being a good sleeper. In our experience, more cuddles = better sleep.

#4 José

Posted 12 February 2013 - 10:44 AM

How is the night time sleep? My ds is now four months. He can sleep for hours during the night but in the day very very rately sleeps beyond one sleep cycle.  DH and I tried resettling for about two weeks and had a really low success rate. Nurse/ sleep consultant said to stop attempting to resettle.  She said he is able to resettle himself as he does so at night and if he wanted to in the day he would.  We cant force it. Hopefully once he starts crawling his sleep will be longer.  Im not sure if this experience is helpful to you or not? Maybe u need to go with the short day sleep for now?

#5 lovedupmumma

Posted 12 February 2013 - 11:11 AM

Sleep at night is good so long as the weather is cool. 1am and 5am feeds after about 8pm the last feed before bed. When the weather is hotter he wakes more frequently at night but over all good.

Lokum, I really don't think he's ready to be up after 40 mins as the grizzling doesn't stop when he's up. DS1 was a shocking cat napper which was OK at the time, but this one has to go to school drop off and pick up and generally get shunted around and if there hasn't been a good slab of sleep in the day the night is a really unsettled.

Also I am trying to make the most of the days when I have DS2 at home with me because he needs some of my time. He's off to school next year and I want to spend some time playing with him not resettling the baby.

QUOTE
She said he is able to resettle himself as he does so at night and if he wanted to in the day he would. We cant force it.


Good point, the nights are OK although it can be hit and miss rolleyes.gif

#6 Lokum

Posted 12 February 2013 - 03:43 PM

QUOTE (lovedupmumma @ 12/02/2013, 12:11 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Lokum, I really don't think he's ready to be up after 40 mins as the grizzling doesn't stop when he's up. DS1 was a shocking cat napper which was OK at the time, but this one has to go to school drop off and pick up and generally get shunted around and if there hasn't been a good slab of sleep in the day the night is a really unsettled.


Fair enough, sounds like he's not happy, especially if there's flow-on to the night sleeps. Try pick him up and cuddle him through to the next sleep cycle, but get to him BEFORE he really rouses? This does require watching like a hawk though, so is rather time consuming.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

How to tell if your child has a speech or language problem

 Left untreated, children who start school with speech and language difficulties face an increased risk of reading and writing difficulties, more bullying, poorer peer relationships and less enjoyment of school. So, what should parents expect of children at different ages?

Finding your tribe as a new mum

How was my renegade mother's group different from my first? They were my kind of people. My tribe.

Following your child's emotional roadmap

Psychologist Angharad Candlin will guide parents through their child's emotional development during her seminar at the Essential Baby and Toddler Show in Sydney this weekend.

Delivery room surprises: when gender predictions are wrong

Out of all the questions asked of mums-to-be, “Do you know what you're having?” would be right up there in popularity. Sometimes,

The fertility battle we don't talk about

“You’re nowhere near menopausal,” my doctor cheerily informed me, and my heart sank. I don’t want to live with worry about pregnancy anymore.

'My morning sickness was so bad I'm not having any more kids'

“All the horrible stuff was totally worth it to have my son. But there is absolutely no way I could go through it all again.”

The 'no children' wedding invite

It was the wedding of one of my oldest and dearest friends, and she had invited me to be her bridesmaid. It was quite an honour. But there was one problem.

Baby Dylan recovering well after spending five days alone

 For up to five days he lay alone after his mother died of a suspected drug overdose, but eight-month-old Dylan Micallef has made an incredible recovery.

Win a $200 Pumpkin Patch voucher

Fill out this quick survey and tell us in 25 words or less your best pregnancy or parenting tip - you'll go in the draw to win a $200 Pumpkin Patch voucher.

The mystery of William Tyrell, little boy lost

The question remains: How does a little boy simply vanish without a trace?

Woman fights off robber, then gives birth

A thief in the US got more than he bargained for when he try to rob a woman who was nine months pregnant because he figured she would be an easy target.

Video: Two-year-old tells mum off for laughing at her

This little girl is not happy that her mum started laughing during her performance - so she tells her exactly how she feels about it.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Losing yourself to motherhood

While watching your baby grow into a unique little person is exciting and wondrous, the intensity of meeting everyone else?s needs can ever so sneakily overtake your own needs for self-care.

Tearing during delivery: the facts

Almost all women will experience bruising, grazing or tearing after a vaginal birth. Depending on the degree of tearing, there are various treatments available.

6 tips for a day out with a baby and toddler

Outings can be lots of fun with the kids, but there are inevitable challenges. Here's some information about days out to help you be a little more prepared.

Why I invited a dozen people to watch my son's birth

I sent invitations on burgundy scrapbooking paper stamped with a field of poppies, and told each person why I wanted him or her there. I warned that there would be nudity.

Getting labour started: tips for a natural induction

When your baby?s due date comes and goes without so much as a pop - let alone a bang - it can be disheartening. Mums and a doula share their stories of natural inductions.

7 mistakes old hands make with new babies

As I sat across the table from my friend ? me, a seasoned mother of three; her, a brand new mum ? I thought of all the mistakes an old-hand parent can make when visiting a newborn baby.

That's my boy: a dad's diary of the first 4 months

Unbearable anxiety, unspeakable joy, constant exhaustion and bouts of frustration ... The many shocks of first-time fatherhood resound in a dad's diary of his son's early months.

One of the most important things a new mum can do

Finances may not be as cute as a newborn, but with many women?s working arrangements changing post-baby, monetary matters need attention too.

When punishment goes too far

What should you do when a stranger goes too far when disciplining their child in public?

Personalised baby gifts

We've scoured the internet to find gorgeous personalised keepsakes and nursery decor to record baby name and dates. They make great gifts for christenings, name days and birthdays! (All prices in AU.)

 

My Wellbeing

Making time for me

We look at your wellbeing, covering health, relationships, beauty and fashion, mind and body.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.