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Birthday party v birthday present
Feeling awfully guilty


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#1 Bony Mum

Posted 09 February 2013 - 09:58 PM

So my DS is about to turn 6 and really wants a big birthday party at one of the "play shops" (eg, Monkey Mania, Lolliepops), and he also wants a semi expensive toy. Problem is I can't afford both, I'm currently on maternity leave and though I'd love to pay for all of it, I just can't afford it with the rest of the bills coming in.
Just wondering if anyone else has told their child they can have one or the other, and how it went down?
And is there anything wrong with a BBQ in the park in Feb, considering how hot it's been as an alternate?
I'm feeling major guilty about this, as I said I'd look into how much it would cost plus I took him to the shops so he could point out presents he'd like to have.

#2 OneProudMum

Posted 09 February 2013 - 10:05 PM

If the toy was something he is going to get a lot of enjoyment out of and he is likely to take good care of it, I would just tell him that he is not having a party at the play centre this year. The option would be a party in the park or no party.

#3 Justaduck

Posted 09 February 2013 - 10:13 PM

I would ask him which he would like most & let him pick

#4 April girl

Posted 09 February 2013 - 10:31 PM

Where are you located?


#5 Gembac8019

Posted 09 February 2013 - 10:49 PM

I'd do either of the following:

a) instead of a ''big'' party at the playcentre, maybe just pick 3 friends to have come along instead..? and still get the toy..

or b) have it at a massive park with a good playground and let them have a big party there..

#6 Bony Mum

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:46 AM

I'm in Canberra, so there are heaps of cool parks around for birthday parties.

#7 Carmen02

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:55 AM

Ive told my DD and DS that for many years and they have picked bigger toy over a party and they have been happy for it in the end. Things are way to expensive now days its to hard to give children everything we want to give them!

#8 CountryFeral

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:57 AM

My nephews are very gregarious little chaps and get invited to parties of assorted levels of OTTness practically every weekend.  And thoroughly enjoy them.

A few years ago we were in the midst of a massive family health drama and nephew #1's birthday was looming - my sister and her husband had neither the time not the energy to organise a party.

#1 took two special friends to the cinema followed by dumplings at the Chinese restaurant.

They had such a lovely time that he has requested similar each year hence - he is old enough now to understand that you cannot have a 'big party' AND a 'big gift' and as he gets partied out during the year he much prefers a sophisticated 'dinner and a movie' than hosting his own big party!

#9 shellyb

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:02 PM

My kids will alternate party year with bigger present year. It was my son's 7th b'day on saturday and he wanted to go to sizzler so we went there with the family then to the football's family day along with his sister and cousin. He had an awesome day and is currently building some of his lego he scored for his birthday biggrin.gif

#10 IsolaBella

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:16 PM

We do one or the other.

DS2 was meant to have a party for his 5th birthday but as he was having friend issues at Kinder we canned the party idea and he got an ipad2 instead. Funnily enough they both would have cost the same.

So it will be this year for his 6th birthday party that he will have his first 'real' party.

DS1 had at party at 5&6 but no party for his 7th.

We do 5th birthday as it is 4yo Kinder year and usually they have friends to invite by then,  6th as it is first year of school. I am hoping to alternate party years from now on. Also scaling down invites to close friends and Bowling/movies type thing.



#11 Ritaroo

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:24 PM

Maybe as the parent and adult in the situation you can just tell him party or toy and see which one he chooses. If it goes down like a lead balloon with him, tough.

#12 DamiansMama

Posted 15 February 2013 - 01:55 PM

QUOTE (broncosbabe @ 09/02/2013, 11:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I would ask him which he would like most & let him pick


Absolutely. Just ask. In my case I know he will want a party, so I don't give him a present nor does he ask.




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