Jump to content

Birthday party v birthday present
Feeling awfully guilty


  • Please log in to reply
11 replies to this topic

#1 Bony Mum

Posted 09 February 2013 - 09:58 PM

So my DS is about to turn 6 and really wants a big birthday party at one of the "play shops" (eg, Monkey Mania, Lolliepops), and he also wants a semi expensive toy. Problem is I can't afford both, I'm currently on maternity leave and though I'd love to pay for all of it, I just can't afford it with the rest of the bills coming in.
Just wondering if anyone else has told their child they can have one or the other, and how it went down?
And is there anything wrong with a BBQ in the park in Feb, considering how hot it's been as an alternate?
I'm feeling major guilty about this, as I said I'd look into how much it would cost plus I took him to the shops so he could point out presents he'd like to have.

#2 OneProudMum

Posted 09 February 2013 - 10:05 PM

If the toy was something he is going to get a lot of enjoyment out of and he is likely to take good care of it, I would just tell him that he is not having a party at the play centre this year. The option would be a party in the park or no party.

#3 Justaduck

Posted 09 February 2013 - 10:13 PM

I would ask him which he would like most & let him pick

#4 April girl

Posted 09 February 2013 - 10:31 PM

Where are you located?


#5 Gembac8019

Posted 09 February 2013 - 10:49 PM

I'd do either of the following:

a) instead of a ''big'' party at the playcentre, maybe just pick 3 friends to have come along instead..? and still get the toy..

or b) have it at a massive park with a good playground and let them have a big party there..

#6 Bony Mum

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:46 AM

I'm in Canberra, so there are heaps of cool parks around for birthday parties.

#7 Carmen02

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:55 AM

Ive told my DD and DS that for many years and they have picked bigger toy over a party and they have been happy for it in the end. Things are way to expensive now days its to hard to give children everything we want to give them!

#8 CountryFeral

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:57 AM

My nephews are very gregarious little chaps and get invited to parties of assorted levels of OTTness practically every weekend.  And thoroughly enjoy them.

A few years ago we were in the midst of a massive family health drama and nephew #1's birthday was looming - my sister and her husband had neither the time not the energy to organise a party.

#1 took two special friends to the cinema followed by dumplings at the Chinese restaurant.

They had such a lovely time that he has requested similar each year hence - he is old enough now to understand that you cannot have a 'big party' AND a 'big gift' and as he gets partied out during the year he much prefers a sophisticated 'dinner and a movie' than hosting his own big party!

#9 shellyb

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:02 PM

My kids will alternate party year with bigger present year. It was my son's 7th b'day on saturday and he wanted to go to sizzler so we went there with the family then to the football's family day along with his sister and cousin. He had an awesome day and is currently building some of his lego he scored for his birthday biggrin.gif

#10 IsolaBella

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:16 PM

We do one or the other.

DS2 was meant to have a party for his 5th birthday but as he was having friend issues at Kinder we canned the party idea and he got an ipad2 instead. Funnily enough they both would have cost the same.

So it will be this year for his 6th birthday party that he will have his first 'real' party.

DS1 had at party at 5&6 but no party for his 7th.

We do 5th birthday as it is 4yo Kinder year and usually they have friends to invite by then,  6th as it is first year of school. I am hoping to alternate party years from now on. Also scaling down invites to close friends and Bowling/movies type thing.



#11 Ritaroo

Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:24 PM

Maybe as the parent and adult in the situation you can just tell him party or toy and see which one he chooses. If it goes down like a lead balloon with him, tough.

#12 DamiansMama

Posted 15 February 2013 - 01:55 PM

QUOTE (broncosbabe @ 09/02/2013, 11:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I would ask him which he would like most & let him pick


Absolutely. Just ask. In my case I know he will want a party, so I don't give him a present nor does he ask.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Video: 10-week-old baby sounds like she says 'I love you'

It’s mixed in amongst garbled baby talk, but this 10-week-old's apparent attempt at telling her parents that she loves them has made her an internet star.

I only enjoyed pregnancy after booking my caesarean

To say I became obsessed is something of an understatement. Everywhere I went I found cause to be reminded of my impending pain.

When your bundle doesn't bring immediate joy

One mum says joy is very a personal feeling and expecting all new mums to feel it in the months after their baby born may do more harm than good.

Lessons learned from my toddler

Blogger Kiran Chug explains why she is going to let her toddler make more decisions for himself.

Family welcomes first baby girl in more than 100 years

The Silverton family has heard the phrase "it's a girl" for the first time in four generations.

When a community of kindness steps in

In future when someone I care for, or even someone I barely know, is experiencing a difficult time, I will not overthink it. I'll follow my heart.

Mum in Business: Jac Bowie

Jac Bowie is the founder of Business in Heels, one of the fastest growing women’s networking events in Australia. She shares her story, including how she juggles work with a young family, and ways to work smarter.

What not to say to a mum of twins

Being a mum of identical twin boys stirs up great interest and fascination. It also opens itself up to nosy, invasive questions, as well as huge assumptions.

The mums suing over unplanned babies

A mother-of-five who calls her two youngest sons "miracle babies" is just one of many mums seeking financial compensation for their children's unplanned conceptions.

Video: Dad sings 'Hallelujah' to his daughter every year

It's a gorgeous song to begin with, but this dad's version of Hallelujah, sung for his young daughter, is especially touching.

Constipation in babies when starting solids

While starting solids can be frustrating and messy (yet also fun!), introducing solids can also play havoc on tiny digestive systems.

Parents reunited with baby snatched from hospital

A mother whose newborn baby was snatched from hospital has spoken of her joy and relief at getting her daughter back.

In defence of the bumpie

Are bumpies - bump selfies - really "exhibitionism of the weirdest kind"?

Life on the other side of the fence: Why I'm child-free and quite content

Acknowledging that motherhood isn't a bed of roses – to begrudge lack of time, sleep, money and spontaneity – is sacrilegious and a no-no, especially by mother superior-types.

'Go the F*** to Sleep' author's new book for frustrated parents

A sequel is coming soon to the 2011 hit book 'Go the F*** to Sleep' - and this time, it's about mealtimes.

Win a $200 Pumpkin Patch voucher

Fill out this quick survey and tell us in 25 words or less your best pregnancy or parenting tip - you'll go in the draw to win a $200 Pumpkin Patch voucher.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Losing yourself to motherhood

While watching your baby grow into a unique little person is exciting and wondrous, the intensity of meeting everyone else?s needs can ever so sneakily overtake your own needs for self-care.

Vote for a chance to win $5000

The first ever Essential Baby Awards, celebrating the best in baby products. We?re inviting you to have your say. Simply vote for your favourite products to win a $5000 VISA debit card.

Tearing during delivery: the facts

Almost all women will experience bruising, grazing or tearing after a vaginal birth. Depending on the degree of tearing, there are various treatments available.

6 tips for a day out with a baby and toddler

Outings can be lots of fun with the kids, but there are inevitable challenges. Here's some information about days out to help you be a little more prepared.

Why I invited a dozen people to watch my son's birth

I sent invitations on burgundy scrapbooking paper stamped with a field of poppies, and told each person why I wanted him or her there. I warned that there would be nudity.

Getting labour started: tips for a natural induction

When your baby?s due date comes and goes without so much as a pop - let alone a bang - it can be disheartening. Mums and a doula share their stories of natural inductions.

7 mistakes old hands make with new babies

As I sat across the table from my friend ? me, a seasoned mother of three; her, a brand new mum ? I thought of all the mistakes an old-hand parent can make when visiting a newborn baby.

That's my boy: a dad's diary of the first 4 months

Unbearable anxiety, unspeakable joy, constant exhaustion and bouts of frustration ... The many shocks of first-time fatherhood resound in a dad's diary of his son's early months.

One of the most important things a new mum can do

Finances may not be as cute as a newborn, but with many women?s working arrangements changing post-baby, monetary matters need attention too.

Baby news for Isla and Sacha

Congratulations are in order for Aussie actress Isla Fisher and her husband, Sacha Baron Cohen.

Personalised baby gifts

We've scoured the internet to find gorgeous personalised keepsakes and nursery decor to record baby name and dates. They make great gifts for christenings, name days and birthdays! (All prices in AU.)

 

Vote to win

What are your favourite baby products?

The first ever Essential Baby Awards, celebrating the best in baby products. We?re inviting you to have your say. Simply vote for your favourite products to win a $5000 VISA debit card.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.