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*Warning termination mentioned*. I need urgent advice on termination please :(

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30 replies to this topic

#1 bigsigh

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:18 PM

Please, don't judge me. This is a horrible situation and I am in a crisis situation and just need some support.

I have just found out I am pregnant and my life is in ruins. My husband left me for another woman 3 months ago and my life is falling apart. I have always said I would never terminate but I have no other choice, I cannot in any way raise a child as I have no way to do this with my 3 children and no support, money or way out of this hole.

My pregnancy is further than 12 weeks. sad.gif I didn't know I was pregnant because I have been having spotting and irregular light bleeding, I thought it was stress from the relationship dissolution, but now I know it was pregnancy.

I have booked in to have a termination in Sydney this week, but the cost is so high and I cannot afford it. I don't have credit cards or savings, my husband has left me in a terrible financial situation. My family are overseas and can't help and I am going to have to sell a lot of things to pay for this. I don't have time to sell on ebay so I will need to sell them to a pawn shop and I'm not sure I can raise the money.

I have been googling all day and I can't find any support services. I have a health care card which reduces the cost slightly but not enough. I thought i might be cheaper to travel interstate if there were better options but I can't seem to find pricing.

Does anyone know where I can get assistance or guidance in any state for a reduced cost service?

Thank you in advance sad.gif

#2 HRH Countrymel

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:20 PM

Have you spoken to Family Planning?  They would be my first call.

#3 9ferals

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:23 PM

Yes, talk to Family Planning, they should know what your options are.
Marie Stopes Clinics are another place who will give you information too.
Hopefully one of these organisations will be able to help you find a service that is right for you.

Good luck with dealing with a very difficult situation OP.

#4 feralisles

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:27 PM

You do get a medicare rebate OP, so although you have to have the full amount up front some of it you can claim back.  You could try talking to the doctor at the centre to see if she is able to reduce the gap for you, given your circumstances (some will, some won't).
The womens health centre I used to work for had a little money put aside to assist women needing terminations when they were unable to pay.  That wasn't in Sydney, but perhaps you could phone some of the Sydney centres to see if they can help at all.
Just be aware that the longer you leave it the harder, more risky and more expensive it becomes.
Is there any chance your ex would help - even if only to save on extra child support payments?

#5 bigsigh

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:28 PM

Thank you .

I have not spoken to family planning yet, I only found out today so I have been at home trying to find information and deal with it. I have looked over the family planning websites but there isn't a lot of information. I have a few numbers to call in the morning for more general advice, but I can't rest until I have a solution.

#6 1miss2littlemen

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:28 PM

Hi OP, I am not sure where you are but there is a place in Brisbane called 'Children by choice' and they may be abe to help you find a place and talk you through original.gif they are nutural party and dont swing either way but may be able to help you find what you are looking for. Hope this helps, I am sorry that you are in such a cruddy situation sad.gif

#7 bigsigh

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:31 PM

Lisles thanks, the cost I was quoted is around $800 out of pocket after rebate, I don't know why it's so much for a 15 minute procedure.

And no my poor excuse of a husband has just dumped us like trash and moved on with his new life, he isn't paying any child support either. I have contacted his parents today but they won't speak to me.

#8 bluecardigans

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:36 PM

Just googling, but looks like only $285 out of pocket. Less with a Health Care Card Cost
How much will it cost?
The cost of the termination procedure is made up of different components eg. procedure itself, anaesthetic and theatre fees, drugs and equipment used. The total cost to you on the day will be approximately $700 including ultrasound scan. Medicare offers a rebate of $415 for the procedure, which can be claimed back immediately. The rest of the fee is non refundable, though some Private Health Funds may cover a proportion of the cost. This means you will be (700-415 ) = $285 out of pocket for the whole procedure. If you have an IUD (intrauterine device) fitted at the time of the procedure, it will be slightly more. For women who have a Health Care Card, the fees are lower. For women who are in very disadvantaged circumstances, some of the fee may be waived, so that essentially she is "bulk billed", provided she has a Medicare card.

Edited by Display anemone, 05 February 2013 - 05:38 PM.

#9 Madeline's Mum

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:38 PM

It shouldn't cost that much, a Sydney clinic near Surry Hills costs about $360.

Ring Marie Stopes, they'll be able to give you a comprehensive overview of the procedure, cost and rebates.

I believe RU486 has recently been legalised and is available from certain GPs.

#10 Neriah

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:41 PM

If in NSW - you can contact Family Planning Talkline on 1300 658 886 for contraceptive, reproductive and sexual health information and referral. The Talkline staff provide callers with information, advice and options across a wide range of reproductive and sexual health issues. Lines are open Monday to Friday 8.30am to 5pm. I also second contacting Marie Stopes. Perhaps you should discuss the financial side of it with your ex, see if he will pay half or all of the costs (but this really depends on whether you want to involve him or not). Can a GP help? Did you have the pregnancy confirmed by one who can discuss your options with you? If you are on centrelink payments you can apply to have your payments paid a couple of weeks in advance when there are exceptional circumstances and a lump sum of money is required. You should then get some back via Medicare I believe.

I hope it all works out for you. I am sorry that you are in this situation. I don't believe you will get any judgement here, nor should you. Take care.

#11 Stacey*

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:43 PM

Can you get a FTB advance payment? They normally only take 2 days to appear in your bank account.

#12 Madnesscraves

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:44 PM

I believe her biggest issue is she's past 12 weeks which may make it more costly?

I'm so sorry you're in this situation OP. I agree speak to family planning and also your GP. They can surely direct you where best to go for your situation.

bbighug.gif is what you need right now! Best of luck with everything OP.

#13 BetteBoop

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:44 PM

OP, I feel so sad for you. It's hard enough to be going through a marriage break up without having an unplanned pregnancy added to the situation.

You can call any abortion clinic directly to make an appointment. Every clinic has limits on how many weeks pregnant you can be in order to access a safe termination.

Can you contact your ex and let him know you need money and what for? He may not want you to proceed with the pregnancy either so he may choose to ante up the cash.

QUOTE (Madeline's Mum @ 05/02/2013, 05:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It shouldn't cost that much, a Sydney clinic near Surry Hills costs about $360.

Ring Marie Stopes, they'll be able to give you a comprehensive overview of the procedure, cost and rebates.

I believe RU486 has recently been legalised and is available from certain GPs.

OP is in her second trimester. $800 after the Medicare rebate is fairly standard. For low income earners, they may be prepared to offer a discount, but this is at the discretion of the clinic.

#14 KT1978

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:48 PM

Can you ask to pay a deposit, and the rest over a few weeks?

Can you ask to pay a deposit, and the rest over a few weeks?

#15 Madeline's Mum

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:50 PM

My apologies, I didn't realise it was on an incline based on gestation. I was going off information based on a much younger gestation.

Apologies again, OP.

#16 Feral_Pooks

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:53 PM

OP, how much do you need to pay? Can you get an advance payment from Centrelink. Usually you can get an advance up to $500, and then they dock your payments a little til it is paid back. Contact Centrelink and ask to speak to a social worker, perhaps they can help make the process easier for you this way.

#17 Jacki:)

Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:58 PM


#18 Missy Shelby

Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:00 PM

Another one that was going to suggest Family Planning as an avenue to investigate.

I hope that it all works out ok for you OP.

#19 bluecardigans

Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:07 PM

QUOTE (Madeline's Mum @ 05/02/2013, 06:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
My apologies, I didn't realise it was on an incline based on gestation. I was going off information based on a much younger gestation.

Apologies again, OP.


I think the Centrelink advance sounds like a good option if at all possible.

#20 Feral.K.

Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:29 PM

I hope you can find a way to get the funds to cover it and I really feel for you OP.

I have to say, I had absolutely no idea that terminations were not free / fully covered by Medicare in Australia or, at the very least, free to Health Care Card holders. I am stunned to hear this is not the case.

#21 noi'mnot

Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:36 PM

It's also worth calling your local public tertiary maternity hospital.

Best of luck OP, you're in a tough situation. Xxx

#22 MrsWidget

Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:38 PM

I'm so sorry you find yourself in this situation. Do you have friends that can help? Also do you have anyone who could take you to thecappointment? I'm in Melbourne or I'd offer.

#23 bigsigh

Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:39 PM

QUOTE (kyte @ 05/02/2013, 07:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I hope you can find a way to get the funds to cover it and I really feel for you OP.

I have to say, I had absolutely no idea that terminations were not free / fully covered by Medicare in Australia or, at the very least, free to Health Care Card holders. I am stunned to hear this is not the case.

From the information I have found there are some circumstances where womens health organisation assist, but they are very limited in who they can provide help to. One public hospital in Victoria do a few for medical reasons for no cost, but otherwise, it's out of pocket costs no matter your financial situation.

The cost of this procedure out of pocket is 3 weeks rent for me, and will mean I will likely be evicted if I can't come up with the money but even that wouldn't qualify for severe hardship when there are other women who are in worse situations who need help.

Thanks ladies but centre link is no help, because i've used all the assistance I could when my husband moved. The SKB just paid my rent.

Thank you all for the information, I have some numbers to call tomorrow, hopefully one of those places can assist.

#24 Snot stew

Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:40 PM

What a horrible situation.  Thinking of you.

#25 CallMeFeral

Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:45 PM

QUOTE (kyte @ 05/02/2013, 07:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I have to say, I had absolutely no idea that terminations were not free / fully covered by Medicare in Australia or, at the very least, free to Health Care Card holders. I am stunned to hear this is not the case.

Me too! That's awful sad.gif  It seems ridiculous to have this as something that can't be accessed by all when necessary sad.gif

All the best OP, what a horrible situation. And what a b*st*rd.

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