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How young is to young for daycare

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#1 samoocha1991

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:02 PM

Hi all I'm a mum of 2 and my 4 year old already goes to day care Wednesday & Fridays they are wonderful there and are an excellent set of people.  I'm trying to decide whether to send my 4 month old there on a Friday.

I need time to study in the course im doing and cant seem to find it, what's everyone elses thoughts.

Feeling very guilty already unsure.gif

babygirl.gif  babygirl.gif

#2 msro82

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:06 PM

DD started at 4.5 months and was fine :-)

#3 Milly Molly Mandy

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:06 PM

You need to not worry about what anyone else thinks and go with what you need and want to do (hopefully those two things match)

#4 her mum

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:07 PM

Depends what you think and what your priorities are I think.

Me personally, I couldn't do it until they're walking as it just seems that then they would be able to have fun as they're no longer at an age that they just want to be held for a good part of the day, which isn't really going to happen at daycare given the number of kids to carers.

I have friends that sent their kids at 8 weeks because they really needed to be able to go back to work.

I don't think it's a decision someone else can make for you.

#5 bubmakes3

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:07 PM

My DS started one day per week from 6 months. He was fine!

#6 HRH Countrymel

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:08 PM

My nephew was going full time from the age of 6 months.  He is now 9 and one of the most delightful, well adjusted little boys you could ever wish to meet.

One day - to allow you to study? Don't feel guilty, feel empowered that you have this option and are able to utilise it to get ahead.

#7 Mose

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:10 PM

Hey there.

There is a special forum further down the main page where you can find all sorts of interesting threads on the topic of daycare.

In answer to your question, I really think this is an extremely personal decision.  For me, I held out until DS was over 12mo - even though both DH and I could see that psychologically I would personally be better off back at work.

If we were ever lucky enough to have number 2, I would probably try and get as close as possible to 12mo again.  It made me happy to think he could crawl and pull himself up to see what was on the activity tables, and that for me, outweighed the desire to return to work.

But I have many colleagues who have cheerfully put their children in daycare from 3 or 4 months old, and have no regrets about doing so.

Of course you want your little one to be happy, but part of their happiness is "whole family happiness" - which they may not be getting if you are constantly stressed about your studies.  

Also, if they were genuinely too young...the centre would say so.  All centres have a minimum age (usually either 6 weeks or 3 months), and that is really the minimum at which the centre says before that they are too young and the centre cannot adequately cater to their needs.  Once you have passed your centre's minimum age then it is really a very personal choice of what is best for your whole family.

#8 The Falcon

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:10 PM

4 months is fine, mine started that age with no problems, though I would say that if your budget would strech to 2 days that would actually be kinder as 1 day can make it a bit harder to settle in.

#9 samoocha1991

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:14 PM

Thanks everyone, I didnt put my first one into daycare untill 2 original.gif so will trial if for a month or so and see how it goes can always stop it if its not suiting.

#10 jibsi

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:14 PM

Hi OP,

I think you have to do whatever you feel comfortable with, ensuring the needs of your family are met.
At the end of the day it really doesn't matter what other people think or do with their families because everyone's situation is different.

Personally I think babies under 12 months are a bit young for daycare, but that is just my opinion, doesn't mean I'm right or wrong. I've been fortunate enough to keep my 2 at home with me until they turn 1 but I realise not everyone can (or wants) to do that.

It also depends on your baby too, some cope better than others with separation.

#11 Especially*K*

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:15 PM

As much as it pained me to see a 2month old at my previous daycare from 6am to 6pm, I think it is ultimately the age that the mother/parents feel comfortable.

Plus, Its only for one day.

#12 outdoorgirl81

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:16 PM

QUOTE (kate789 @ 05/02/2013, 03:10 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
4 months is fine, mine started that age with no problems, though I would say that if your budget would strech to 2 days that would actually be kinder as 1 day can make it a bit harder to settle in.

I think it is a very personal choice, my daughter started 1 day a week just before 6 months at a centre I was happy with.

Just wanted to respectfully disagree with above opinion (only my opinion also) At this age TBH I think they do respond best to 1 or 1 care with a parent like figure (not always possilble or  what is best for the family/ mother though). Not suggesting not to use 2 days a week if that is best, but if you only wanted to use 1 day I don't think there is anything to be gained from the extra day in terms of " settling in" etc.

#13 Roobear

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:25 PM

QUOTE (outdoorgirl81 @ 05/02/2013, 03:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Just wanted to respectfully disagree with above opinion (only my opinion also) At this age TBH I think they do respond best to 1 or 1 care with a parent like figure (not always possilble or  what is best for the family/ mother though). Not suggesting not to use 2 days a week if that is best, but if you only wanted to use 1 day I don't think there is anything to be gained from the extra day in terms of " settling in" etc.

2 days was definitely kinder to DD who started daycare at 13 months for one day a week. After 4 weeks of being very unhappy the centre suggested putting her in a second day to help her cope. Within a 2 weeks she was waving me good bye at the door and after a few more weeks at 2 days I cut her back to 1 day no problem.

Personally I try to avoid daycare under 12 months if I can but their are personal circumstances where it is unavoidable. DD went to daycare one morning a week aged between 7-9 months so I could finish off my degree. I am better off and she is better off having a mum with better job opportunities and who is more financially secure original.gif

Edited by Roobear, 05 February 2013 - 02:27 PM.

#14 GamerMum

Posted 05 February 2013 - 02:32 PM

DD started on two days a week at 4 months because I had to work. I was taking her with me up until then and I wasn't getting anything done. She's now 5 months and will be starting 3 days a week this week as my work hours have increased.

She loves it, the other kids there love her, and the carers are wonderful! I would love to have her with me all the time, but it's just not possible. I hate dropping her off, but she doesn't mind at all. Tounge1.gif

#15 samoocha1991

Posted 06 February 2013 - 08:33 AM

So booked my 4 month old in yesterday to go fridays couldnt sleep all night so this morning I took her right back out original.gif WAY TO SOON FOR ME. Will juggle study but baby's are only little once!!!  hheart.gif

Edited by samoocha1991, 06 February 2013 - 08:33 AM.

#16 RunDMC

Posted 06 February 2013 - 04:31 PM

Hi Op, I read another thread today where the OP got a babysitter in for the day so she could have a day off. Could you do something like that, get a babysitter. How about a high school student in for a couple of hours a few afternoons a week to play with your kids while you are at home studying?

#17 samoocha1991

Posted 07 February 2013 - 09:04 AM

QUOTE (RunDMC @ 06/02/2013, 05:31 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi Op, I read another thread today where the OP got a babysitter in for the day so she could have a day off. Could you do something like that, get a babysitter. How about a high school student in for a couple of hours a few afternoons a week to play with your kids while you are at home studying?

Saw this to am definatly going to look into finding someone what a great idea!!!

#18 Propaganda

Posted 07 February 2013 - 09:19 AM

I think it depends on what you're comfortable with.

I wasn't comfortable with leaving my daughter in the care of a centre until she was over 3. I wanted for her to be able to communicate any problems she might have verbally so if anything was amiss, I could find out about it.

I might feel differently when I have another child.

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